Holding a Tender Heart (3 page)

The thought still rankled. Her mother's fingerprints were on all the major decisions of her life. “Purpose, my girl!” mother would say if she were here—just as she had during Debbie's four years of college. The truth was that getting a job and looking classy weren't the goals Debbie had in mind for herself. She glanced at her watch and shot up from the breakfast table. She couldn't be late for this interview! That would not go down well with Mr. Fulton, much less her parents.

Debbie tried to dull the stab of regret with a final rush through the house. She grabbed her keys and forced herself outside and into the car. She pulled out of the driveway and drove above the speed limit for the first mile. The trip into Lewistown soon slowed to a crawl as the traffic increased and cars had to make their way around
the occasional buggy and horse clip-clopping along the side of the road. Since she was late, this should stir her angst, but it didn't. She felt more relaxed the more buggies she passed. They reminded her that the world she lived in wasn't all that important. Seen from the inside of a buggy, life passed in slow motion. The fields inched past buggy doors. Time stretched out, it seemed, and took its time to go by. Debbie smiled at the thought of how the Amish, despite their slow pace, seemed to have more time than anyone else. They savored each hour. They never seemed to rush about like she was at the moment.

She swung deftly around another buggy. She glanced at the horse as she went past. The animal plodded on with its nose close to the ground, looking tired from the uphill climb. She waved to the young woman and child inside. The woman responded with a smile and a wave. Who they were, Debbie had no idea. The Snyder County Amish Church Districts were spread over the long valley, and no one knew everyone, even among the Amish. The Amish had the time and the confidence to wave back—even to strangers. Debbie liked that.

Debbie fought the traffic for several more minutes and eventually arrived at the warehouse buildings of Destiny Relocation Services. They were the local branch of a national chain of movers that had more than 250 outlets in the United States.
What an appropriate name for my first job
Debbie thought as she parked her car. Destiny! Was this hers?

Mr. Fulton probably hoped people would find the company's name a comfort as he hauled their belongings across the country. Perhaps the name suggested that destiny had played a hand literally and divinely in a major and, no doubt, unsettling life experience. Perhaps she could also find purpose and meaning here. Wouldn't that be something?

Debbie entered the front door and gave her name to the young woman at the desk.

“Mr. Fulton will be with you in a moment,” the woman told her with a smile. “I'm Rhonda Clemens.”

“Good to meet you!” Debbie returned the smile and then took a seat in the small waiting room. Moments later Mr. Fulton appeared. “Hello, Debbie. Glad you could come in today.”

“Good morning, Mr. Fulton.” Debbie stood. “I'm sorry I'm a little late. I hadn't counted on the traffic.”

“Ah, what does it matter for today?” Mr. Fulton waved her in. “You're the only interview I've scheduled this morning. So let's see what we can do for you. Please have a seat.” Mr. Fulton motioned toward a chair. “How are your parents?”

“They're fine,” Debbie replied as she sat down.

Mr. Fulton beamed. “Good, good. So I hear you're graduating this weekend? From Franklin & Marshall?”

Debbie nodded.

“Fine old school. I see you majored in sociology and anthropology. You earned good grades, I assume.”

Debbie nodded. “An ‘A' average I hope, but I haven't gotten my final grades for this semester.”

“Now, now,” Mr. Fulton chided, “don't be modest about it. I wouldn't expect anything else from Herbert Watson's daughter.” He grinned. “What are your plans this summer?”

“Working, I hope.”

“Anything beyond that? Any vacation plans?”

What was she supposed to say? Debbie wondered. No doubt Mr. Fulton expected answers like a Disney World trip or a church mission outing. Perhaps travel out West, a vacation in Yellowstone, or spending time in the Bitterroot Mountains. None of which she'd planned. What she really wanted was a summer spent on the Beiler farm where she'd get up at five o'clock each morning, eat breakfast as part of the large family, and then help with chores. But if she gave that kind of an answer, Mr. Fulton would probably turn her down on the spot.

“I'm staying in the area,” she told him.

“Well, you might wish to spread your wings a little next year,” Mr. Fulton offered. “Our company offers two-weeks paid vacation time. That's enough to get most anywhere folks wish to go.”

Debbie found nothing to say in reply, so she just smiled and nodded.

Mr. Fulton went on. “I've looked over your application and, of course, knowing your parents, I have no qualms about your ability to do a good job here. The job is yours…if you want it.”

“Yes, I do want it! That's very kind. Thank you, Mr. Fulton!”

“Well then, that's just fine. When can you start?”

“Whenever you wish! Sometime after this week, I guess.” Debbie searched for more words to say. The interview had been so short, and she hadn't expected to be hired on the spot.

“Fantastic!” Mr. Fulton glowed. “How about next Tuesday then? You'll have your own office in the back. Sally Wells, from billing, will give you the basic training you'll need.”

“Thank you so much!” Debbie gave Mr. Fulton her best smile. A little rush of joy ran through her. Her first full-time job!

Mr. Fulton rose. “Give my regards to your parents. I'll see you at eight o'clock on Tuesday. Don't run late now. Work begins at eight o'clock sharp.”'

“I'll be here!” Debbie said as she rose and offered her hand. “And thank you again, Mr. Fulton.”

“You're welcome, Debbie. Glad we can take you on. You'll do well with us, I'm sure.”

Mr. Fulton showed her to the lobby. As she went past the front desk, Rhonda gave her a little wave. Debbie waved back and smiled. Next week she'd be a part of this place. Her destiny, no doubt! It warmed her heart yet also left an emptiness inside. Perhaps she expected too much from life. Perhaps she was being idealistic. A job was a job, and she was thankful to be able to earn a living. Interest in the work would no doubt grow as time went on.

As Debbie drove back toward Beaver Springs, an idea formed. She ought to celebrate! But with whom? Mom was at work, and so was Dad. Either of them would go out to eat with her tonight if she asked—tired though they'd be from their day's work. But no, there must be a better idea. Debbie thought the matter over for a moment. Yes, there were people she could celebrate with—if she dared.

Would the Beilers think her crazy if she stopped by for lunch? No, if there was a danger of that, it would have happened years ago. They were always glad to see her. For this moment, at least, she would pursue her dream. She would step into an Amish home and relish the feel of it. Lois and her mom, Saloma, might only have sandwiches ready for a quick bite to eat, but they would have plenty, and that would be enough.

Debbie drove faster and whipped her car around a few buggies. Now she was the one who buzzed past the slow-moving vehicles as she dashed around another buggy on Route 522. She pressed on, and a few minutes before twelve turned in at the Beilers' lane. She brought her car to a stop beside the buggies parked near the barn. There was no sign of anyone around, but that only meant they were inside the house or in the barn hard at work. Everyone was home. She knew the buggies well enough to figure that out.

Debbie climbed out of her car, walked up to the front door, and knocked.

Verna opened the door and wrapped her arms around Debbie's neck. “
Ach
, it's so
gut
to see you again! You haven't been by in a long time.” Verna let go and stepped back. “I had begun to think you'd forsaken us.”

Debbie laughed and stepped inside. “If you only knew! I've been busy, what with graduation this weekend and…”

“Oh!” Lois gasped from the kitchen doorway, her face almost glowing. “That's so
wunderbah
, Debbie. A real college education! You ought to be so happy you can't sleep at night.”

“It's not that big a deal, Lois, really,” Debbie said. But by the look
on Lois's face, Debbie could see she wasn't convinced. As usual, Lois thought all things
Englisha
were the best things that could happen to a person.

Ida stuck her head through the kitchen doorway. “Hi, Debbie! You're just in time for lunch.”

“I hoped you'd say that,” Debbie admitted. “I've missed you all.”

“So tell me about the college thing.” Lois's face still glowed.

Debbie winced. “Like I said, it's not that big a deal, Lois. At graduation we all wear hats with tassels, some professors make speeches, we get our diplomas, and we go home. Then it's back to our normal lives.”

“Oh, but that's so
wunderbah
!” Lois said. “So it's Saturday? May I come? I'd love to see the ceremony for myself.”

Debbie hesitated. “I don't know about that, Lois. Your parents, you know…”

“I'll convince them,” Lois said, though a tinge of doubt was in her voice.

“I have more news!” Debbie said. “I just got my first full-time job!”

Lois's hands flew to her face. “Now I'm so jealous I could turn green, Debbie. A real job!”

Debbie smiled at her friend's enthusiasm. “Work away from home is not all it's cooked up to be, I'm sure.”

Lois didn't appear convinced, but before she could say anything more, Saloma appeared.

“Debbie!” she said. “Surely you're staying for lunch? Or have you eaten already?”

Debbie smiled. “I'd love to stay if you don't mind.”

“It would be a joy,” Saloma told her. “You're almost part of the family, you know.”

Oh, if that were only true!
Debbie thought.

Lois announced in a loud voice, “Debbie found her first job today, and she's celebrating.”

“That's
gut
,” Saloma said. “I'm glad for you, Debbie.”

Debbie knew that Amish women seldom worked outside their homes. She'd heard they sometimes worked during
rumspringa
, but she didn't know if Saloma had done that. Except for
rumspringa
, the Beiler daughters would probably never work outside their community either. Saloma was congratulating her because she rejoiced with those who rejoiced. That was the kind of people the Beilers were. “Thank you,” she said. “I'm grateful to have a full-time job in this market.”

“So why are we wasting time then?” Saloma waved her hands toward the kitchen. “
Daett
and Emery just got in the washroom, and the sandwiches and soup are ready.”

“Come then!” Lois led Debbie to the kitchen table. Debbie slipped onto the back bench. This was her familiar spot since childhood on those occasions when she'd eaten with the Beiler family. Debbie felt a tear slip down her cheek. She really shouldn't be this affected by a simple lunch. The emotion probably came because she'd thought too much about her future the past few days. And now she was thinking about her past at this house with this family. Since she was an adult with a job, there would probably be fewer occasions like this. No doubt meals with the Beilers would become just a memory in a few short years. Memories of the Beiler place would become ever more distant as the years rolled past. No wonder she was sad. She did the best she could to hide the tears. Who among the Beilers would understand such an emotion?

“Hi, Debbie!” Bishop Beiler boomed as he came in through the washroom doorway. Water droplets still clung to his lengthy gray beard. “What a nice surprise.”

“It's good to see you too,” Debbie said.

Emery nodded to her but didn't say anything as he sat down. He was much like his older brothers. Mostly they ignored this
Englisha
friend of their sisters who appeared and disappeared at irregular intervals.

Bishop Beiler stroked his moist beard. “Well, looks like we only have sandwiches and soup, but let's give thanks nonetheless.”

He only teased, Debbie knew, as they bowed their heads together for prayer. She reached up to wipe a stray teardrop on her cheek.

Three