Honest Cravings (4 page)

Alison was sitting in her chair in front of the fire. Her mind lingered on Aaron’s words from the night before, about how he’d read her books and used them to introduce her to new sexual highs. Now, she glanced down at the novel he’d left for her on the nightstand before departing for the day—well over three hundred pages wrapped in mystery. Books had always been her joy, but now that she knew Aaron used them as a tool to help her reach subspace and beyond, they held even more meaning.

What new ideas would this book hold? And would he expect a new activity from her as soon as he got home? Her body shivered with anticipation, with the endless possibilities of what might lie within the creamy pages—of what ideas Aaron might want her to have while she waited for them to act it out on their own.

Licking her lips, with the fire blazing in front of her, Alison opened the book to its cover page. The hard spine cracked as she opened it, and she scented the air, inhaling the aged paper, the black letters and the smooth ink. Of all the scents in the world, only a handful of them could compare to how she felt with a new book. Perhaps it was more mental than anything else, knowing a new world waited within the unread pages. While other couples enjoyed their homemade porn videos, Alison would be happier to read a book anytime. And Aaron knew this.

Television and movies were a rare treat, for either when she’d run out of things to read or when she was too tired to do so. Not that the films or television shows ever stoked her mind nearly as well as a book could. She craved the knowledge they brought, even if most of the books she read were fiction.
All books have a bit of truth in them.
Books likely wouldn’t exist at all if it wasn’t for the author putting himself inside the pages alongside his characters.

Curling her legs beneath her, Alison began to read, her gaze floating over the curl of each letter as she fell into a new world. A gorgeous woman, a handsome man and a handful of toys was all it took for Alison to feel completely at home inside the old pages.

At first, the story seemed to mirror her life perfectly. A new couple, a warm cabin and a home far away from public view. Her brow furrowed however, when she came to a few of her submissive mannerisms—not displayed by the woman, but by the man.

Reading further, she was surprised to find the story was not about her Dom or any other male Dom, but a Domme, better known simply as a Mistress. She’d never read a book with a dominant female before. She was used to females being subs, or both partners being complete equals. The idea of a dominant female—of being a Domme herself—frightened her. Much like a word said out of place, the thought of dominating Aaron felt wrong. It didn’t taste right at all.

Still, remembering what Aaron had said, Alison continued to read, ignoring the fact that in this novel, the roles were somehow reversed. The more she read, the deeper she fell into this strange world. The Mistress in the book used collars, leashes and cuffs, much like Aaron used on her. But what made the characters in the book so different were the activities they did with one another.

The woman did what the book called facesitting or queening. The female would essentially squat over the man’s face, practically smothering him until he pleased her to her liking. The whole idea sounded risky, especially when compared to a female sucking a male. At least she could still breathe!

From just this one book, Alison learned about corporal punishment, causing a man pain and then finally, refusing a man—her Aaron—permission to orgasm. Rubbing at her eyes, Alison set the book in her lap. As her clit throbbed from the mental stimuli, her mind refused to believe it was something Aaron would ever want or expect her to do.

Even so, he’d given her the book for a reason. So, taking a breath, she did the same as always. She kept reading. Maybe there was something she was missing, something that could tell her why Aaron had bought the book for her in the first place.

* * * *

Exhausted from her day of reading and frustrated with the ending of her book, Alison rested on her chair, her robe in place. Most nights, her mind would obsess over what she’d read, but tonight, she was more than happy to forget all about it.
He brought home the wrong book.
She was sure of it. The entire time, she had been expecting the woman to remove the man’s chastity belt, to please him, to offer him release. It had never happened, and now she felt just as sexually frustrated as the man in the story probably had.

After stoking the fire, Alison sat back down in her chair, glaring at the book now resting on the mantelpiece. She nearly jumped when she heard the click of the lock on the front door, soon followed by Aaron’s distinct footsteps.

Without looking at him, she buried her hands in her lap and bowed her head. She glanced at him anxiously once he’d reached her side, her robe hanging over her shoulders just the way he liked. She waited patiently for him to untie the rope around her waist, to remove the robe and to kiss her bare skin. None of these things happened. Her body screamed for his attention, but all he did was sit in front of her, his head bowed.

Alison’s cheeks grew hot as her stomach growled, so loudly, in fact, that Aaron lifted his head and smiled.

“Did you not eat today?” he asked with surprise.

“I forgot,” Alison said gently, nodding to her book above the fireplace.

Hell, she hadn’t even stopped to please herself to the edge of a climax after lunch. She’d been so focused on the book and its hidden meaning that she’d forgotten to do much else. Aside from the occasional bathroom break, she’d neglected to clean the house, eat or even nap. Her eyes were heavy, but she made sure he didn’t notice.

“Did you nap?” Aaron asked, as if he could hear her thoughts.

“No, Sir,” Alison said, defaulting to her role as a sub. She hoped it would be enough to show him she was willing and waiting—the same as always.

Either out of concern or as a test, Aaron ignored her formality outside the bedroom, his voice falling silent.

Minutes passed until finally, he spoke. “What did you learn today?”

Unlike most of her books, which seemed to have some sort of magic spell hidden inside, this new one had left her confused. The Dom in her book had been female, not male. And the male sub had acted the way she did every day with Aaron. None of it felt right to her. Surely he hadn’t given her the book as a way to suggest that they switch roles. It was times like this that she wished he would tell her what he wanted. Then again, if their roles had reversed since this morning, he’d have no reason to command her at all.

Before the silence could muffle her words for good, Alison blurted out her frustration, “I thought you and I agreed on being intellectual equals when we first started going together.”

Aaron nodded. “We did.”

“Then why won’t you talk to me? We always talk about my books, and about your work.”

“We did.”

“Did?”

“My rules are not your rules, Alison.”

Alison frowned. “So that was your reason for the book then? For us to reverse roles?” Aaron didn’t reply. “Answer me!”

“Yes.”

Alison was relieved when he didn’t call her Sir, or Miss, or whatever the hell a male sub was supposed to call a dominant female. Hearing the words pass through his lips would’ve sounded just as inappropriate as they probably would’ve felt for him to say them.

Still, he hadn’t been lying the night before when he’d said everything was going to change.
Even the rules?
She’d lived by them for so long, she’d spent so much time training as a sub, she didn’t know how to act or not to act as a Domme.

“You will be yourself, my Dom, like always,” Alison said, her jaw tightening around the words.

“Won’t you at least give it a try?” Aaron asked, picking the book off the mantelpiece and handing it over to her.

“I don’t want things to change.”

“It’s not forever, Alison. It’s just something different. Remember when you first wanted to be a sub?”

Alison nodded.

“You weren’t a sub back then. I’ve been reading your books. I see the pleasure you get from the pain, as I’m sure you know how much it pleases me to give you that pain, but it isn’t fair. I’m jealous of you, Ali. I’ve been wanting to switch roles for a long time now. Let me experience it, just this once. Just for one night. Let me be a sub.
Your
sub.”

Alison bit at the inside of her cheek as she chewed on his words. It made sense. Her desire to be a sub was so strong, it had been all she could think about. Now she wondered how long Aaron had wanted to try her role, and if he’d like it too much to give it back.

Alison inclined her head with a sigh. “Just once,” she murmured.

“That’s all I ask,” Aaron said, settling his hands around her own. “But I should be the one bowing, not you.”

Alison corrected her posture, looking into his eyes. Aaron dipped his head and averted his gaze, just as he’d seen her do so many times before.

Alison lifted his chin with one hand, ignoring the war between being a Domme and a sub that was taking place inside her body. “There are a few things I need, sub.” Alison shook her head. “My pet.” No, that wasn’t right either.

Aaron smirked and bowed his head. “While you try to figure out what to call me, I’ll be thinking of all the things you can do to me once you’ve made up your mind.”

It was a challenge, and one Alison wasn’t likely to ignore.

Chapter Four

“A safe word,” Alison began, after giving her new role some thought. “For you, I mean.”

“I probably won’t need it, but I’ll use the same one I offered to you the first night I brought you home,” Aaron replied, confident as ever.

Alison gave him a sideways glance. “Do I have to use all of the tools inside our chest?” she asked, not even sure if she’d seen them all.

“Of course not, but that’s what this experiment is for. Use whatever you like.” Aaron bowed his head between them.

He seemed so helpless now, like an injured fawn. She’d never seen him so vulnerable before, and all she could think about was taking him in her arms and consoling him.
This isn’t like after a bad day at work. You’re the Domme now. You need to stay in control.
But it was the control over him that she didn’t like.

“It will teach us to appreciate each other’s roles better,” Aaron said when she didn’t speak.

That was the purpose of this test—to show that even though they had their individual roles, they’d always be equals, both in mind and sexuality.
It’s only this once,
Alison reminded herself, heading into their room.

She retrieved her collar and leash from the top of the dresser—right where he’d left them. Grabbing the cool leather, Alison slid the collar between her fingers. With the items in hand, she padded back to the main room, pausing in front of her sub.

“Key,” Alison ordered, holding out her hand.

Aaron dug in his pocket and handed over the key to their chest. Alison placed the key in the pocket of her robe and leaned over him, placing the collar around his neck. It looked horribly out of place on him. Aaron swallowed loud enough for her to hear, and she worked on the buckle, making sure to leave enough space between the leather and his skin to fit two fingers.

“Come, sub,” Alison growled, attaching the leash to his collar. She still didn’t feel right when the words passed over her lips, but every name she could’ve used on him would have felt just as foreign as the one before it. ‘Sub’ would have to do. “You will walk two paces behind me,” she continued, pulling on the leash to indicate he should stand. “No more, and no less.”

“Yes, my Domme,” Aaron said, his voice so low she could barely hear it.

“Speak up when you talk to me.”

“Yes, my Domme,” Aaron said again, a little louder than before.

Wrapping the excess leash around her one hand, Alison led him to their room, the key in her pocket feeling as though it were dragging on the ground, holding her back.
You’re imagining things,
Alison growled under her breath.
It’s just for one night.

“You will tell me if something hurts,” Alison said as they entered the room. It wasn’t a question. She closed the door behind him. “Understood?”

“Yes, Mistress,” came Aaron’s submissive voice.

It didn’t sound right on him. It wasn’t husky at all and sounded more timid than anything else. Cautious. And the name he used grated on her nerves.
He’s just as uncertain about this as I am.
But if that was true, why had he insisted on their switching roles in the first place?
To appreciate one another,
Alison reminded herself. Aaron wanted a small glimpse of the life she lived from her position to better understand his sub. He was always looking out for her, so wanting to take part as a sub made complete sense.

Alison glared at his fully clothed body and contemplated the prospect of disrobing him. She shook her head. The less he looked like her Dom, the man she knew and loved, the better. He could leave most of his clothing on. But his pants… Those had to go. That much she was certain of.

“Remove your pants,” Alison ordered, releasing the leash as she turned away from him.

She retrieved the key from her pocket and unlocked the chest, her breath catching in the back of her throat. She’d never studied the full contents of the chest before, and by the looks of it, this was the first time her Dom had decided to become the sub. She ignored the growing anxiety in her stomach, along with the possibility of her being the one to break him in. She didn’t want him to be disobedient, but she didn’t want him to submit either.

What if their switch in roles caused him to hesitate later on? What if he liked it more than being a Dom?
Don’t you think he has the same concerns about you?
Alison bit at her bottom lip, deep in thought. She almost jumped out of her skin when Aaron cleared his throat, still standing near the doorway.

Knowing she’d be curious about their switching roles later on if she didn’t go through with it now, Alison rummaged through the chest, pulling out a dark piece of fabric. She turned back towards Aaron, her head bowed, avoiding looking at his face. She folded the fabric a few times until it resembled the blindfold he’d used on her so many times before. Without sight, his senses would become heightened, and by covering his eyes, she could always remember them belonging to her Dom, not a shivering sub.