Hookah (Insanity Book 4) (11 page)

“Do-Do,” I repeat the words. “The Dodo. That’s where it came from?”

“Exactly. Except that this is the kind of stuff historians will tell you,” the Pillar says. “I’m not saying he didn’t pick the name to reflect on his stuttering. But that wasn’t just it.”

“There is a bigger picture?”

“There is always a bigger picture if you open your eyes. The dodo is also an extinct bird. And it couldn’t fly. There are only records of it, and some claim they see it every now and then, but without concrete evidence.”

“Are you saying Lewis was pointing to the bird, too? Why? I don’t see a connection.”

“Of course you see a connection, an immense one, for that matter.” The Pillar points downward, right underneath the chopper.

I look, but it takes me a moment to see it.

Don’t get me wrong. It’s huge. Immense, like he said. But that’s the reason I couldn’t grasp what I was seeing at first.

But now I do. There is no question about it. One of Nazca Lines is of a Dodo. And I am staring at it right now.

St Peter’s, The Vatican

T
he White Queen couldn’t believe her eyes.

Standing at the basilica’s entrance, the world in front of her had slipped into chaos. It had begun a few hours back after Alice left yesterday. A few tourists began shouting and fighting with one another. But it wasn’t much. The police took care of the matter immediately.

And then last night the news of the plague had spread everywhere in Italy. Rome in particular had spiraled into a mad hole of swearing and kicking, something its people were naturally attracted to.

Then the madness escalated at the speed of light.

People everywhere were simply trying to hurt others. You couldn’t really make out what the fighting was about, since it was usually caught in its last stages, where fighters uttered no coherent sentences.

It reminded Fabiola of all the wars in the history of the world. Wars that last as long as thirty years, if not more. At some point in, you’d ask either side what they were fighting for, and you could not get an answer. Because none of them remembered what had started this.

This was what the Vatican was turning into. The world was turning into.

Now Fabiola was standing before the basilica, appalled by the fighting taking place in the piazza.

This was a place where people from all over the world came to share common beliefs. This wasn’t a place to fight one another, let alone kill one another.

But she had made her decision.

She was allowing the uninfected people to enter the basilica for shelter—it was easy to pick them out; they simply didn’t want to hurt anyone else.

Fabiola was about to face a peculiar decision. In a few moments, she was going to close the doors to the basilica and shelter herself with the uninfected. Something she hated to do, because she hated to give up on anyone, even the damned – like her.

Nazca Desert, Peru

L
anding in the middle of the Dodo artwork, I am starting to feel like the Alice in Wonderland in the book all over again.

I mean, most of my journey is about meeting up with the weirdest of the weird characters like in the book. It’s like my mind is being opened up to so many ideas and worlds it’s driving me crazy. So many times I find myself an observer, yet I can’t help but want more.

Curiouser and Curiouser.

“So let’s get this straight,” I ask the Pillar as we stand alone in the middle of the desert, the chauffeur having taken off again with the kids, “Lewis Carroll knew about this Dodo mark in Peru and decided to mention it in his book?”

“No, that’s not it.” The Pillar has picked up his cane again, looking around as if searching for an address in this endless maze of desert sands. “The Dodo is Lewis’s alter ego, sort of mocking everyone who mocked his stuttering, but at the same time Lewis knew something about the Nazca Lines.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“Don’t you get it?” The Pillar stares back. “Lewis Carroll knew something of the creation of this world. Like his knowledge of Wonderland, he knew of the past secrets of this real world.”

“Let’s just hypothetically say that’s true.” I don’t buy any of it. “What does this place have to do with it?”

“I don’t know what it is exactly. All I know is that the drug industry in the world was created by the likes of the Executioner, who was once a Wonderland Monster—“

“And I assume you’re one of them.”

“Yes, Alice. I was a drug lord,” he says as if it’s about the norm. “And when I was in the business, the Dodo was a major meeting place to pick and hand over certain packages and money. Don’t ask me why. What matters is that we’re waiting for the man who met with Lewis Carroll and told him how to cook the plague two years ago.”

“Okay.” I calm myself, trying to cope with too many puzzles. I remind myself that finding the cure is my priority. “So this man who met Lewis here is supposed to just arrive?”

“He usually does when he sees someone waiting here. It’s not like you’d find two people arriving here every day.”

“I suppose so,” I say. “So who is he, the man we we’re waiting for?”

“He is a nobody.”

“Excuse me?”

“Like I said. We’re waiting for nobody.” The Pillar points at the vast emptiness.

“Excellent,” I resist rolling my eyes this time. “I see nobody on the road.”

The Pillar turns to me with a smirk on his face. “Funny, that’s exactly what Alice said to the King of Hearts in the book, Alice Through the Looking Glass.”

S
urprisingly, I do remember this part in the book, when Alice tells the King of Hearts, ‘I see nobody on the road.’ It’s in the chapter called The Lion and the Unicorn in Alice Through the Looking Glass.

In the book, the King of Hearts replies and says, ‘I only wish I had such eyes. To be able to see Nobody! And at the distance too!’

The whole idea of that part is that Lewis Carroll had listed Nobody as a character in the end of the book. Talk about Carrollian madness.

“One of the most underestimated characters of Wonderland.” The Pillar points toward a hazy figure arriving on a bicycle in the horizon.

“That’s Mr. Nobody, I assume,” I say. “The man who we’re supposed to meet.”

“Here is the catch,” the Pillar explains, flashing a wide fake smile at Mr. Nobody. “Those few men who pass valuable information through the desert are all called Nobodies in the drug industry. Why? Because you’re not supposed to know their names or see them again. Get it?”

“So you drug people used Lewis Carroll’s book references in your sick business.”

“On the contrary,” the Pillar says. “Nobody and the Executioner lived in Wonderland once.”

Before I can comprehend this, Nobody arrives.

He is a bald man, sweaty, too heavy for the meek bicycle he’s riding. He grips a large handkerchief, the size of a beach towel, and uses it to mop sweat off his forehead.

Who drives a bicycle in the desert?

“Nobody looks exhausted,” I comment.

“That’s a double entendre, dear Alice.” The Pillar amuses himself. “Do you mean Nobody looks exhausted, or nobody looks exhausted?”

“What’s your business here?” Nobody demands in a suspicious tonality.

“The Executioner sent us,” the Pillar begins. I assume the word hasn’t spread yet about the Executioner’s death. “We want to ask you about a certain man you met here two years ago. The one who asked you to cook that hookah plague.”

“Ah.” Nobody grins. “I remember him. I’ve also seen the plague’s effect in the news. So what’s in it for me? Why should I tell you about him?”

“What do you want?” I say. “Money?”

“I have enough of that,” Nobody says. “Offer me something I can’t resist, or I will tell you nothing.”

The Pillar and I exchange brief glances.

“What can a somebody offer a Nobody?” The Pillar rubs his chin.

“If I were you, I’d make it fast,” Nobody says. “In case you haven’t heard, the plague has wreaked havoc all over the world. At this moment, people are killing each other in the streets. Whole towns are at war with their neighboring towns.”

“What?” I haven’t had the chance to check the news since I landed in Mushroomland.

“The world is ending much sooner than you think.”

Buckingham Palace, London

T
he Queen of Hearts stared down from her balcony at the hordes of citizens wanting to break into the palace and kill her.

If it hadn’t been for her guards, she’d have been killed and eaten by those lunatics by now. Those awful human beings. Not only had they humiliated her and every Wonderlander in the Circus, but now they wanted to kill her.

“Margaret!” the Queen yelled. “You ugly Duchess!”

“Yes?”

“What happened with sending someone to find out if the Pillar found a cure?”

“I contacted the Cheshire, who said he’d send someone after him,” Margaret said. “But I haven’t heard from him since then. Besides, the citizens ransacked many phone towers. It’s hard to connect with anyone now.”

“So you failed, as always.” The Queen stepped up that tall chair so she could shout at Margaret in the face. “I should have your head chopped off,” she said. “Who thought Lewis Carroll would just pop up and lash this madness onto us. He’s about to destroy the world before I can have my fun torturing everyone.”

“I have an idea, My Queen,” Margaret said.

“What now? All your ideas are as ugly as you.”

“I saw a video of Lewis Carroll looking for the drug for his migraines, which isn’t sold in this world, as you know.”

“Of course I know it. We used to call it Lullaby. The one pill exclusively made to handle Carroll’s hallucinations.”

“He’s been walking around like a madman, killing pharmacists to stop the headaches. Why not fool him into thinking we have it and bring him here?”

“Here?” The Queen’s eyes widened. “You know how much I’m afraid of him.”

“He scares us all, but every monster has his weakness. Besides, you can always bring down a man with the power of your endless guards,” Margaret said. “They could torture him until he tells us about the cure. Bear in mind that the migraine is killing him. We could give him something that’ll worsen it. He will then be weak enough to spill the truth.”

“The truth.” The Queen waved her hands, the chair underneath her rattling a little. “Everyone wants to know the truth these days. Look, this is your last chance to make things right. Find him and bring him to me – on his knees, if you can.”

“Of course, My Queen. I’d say an hour or two, and you will have him in here.” Margaret said, having no idea how she could catch a monster like the Lewis Carroll man.

Nazca Desert, Peru

“H
ow about we make you a somebody.” The Pillar grins back at Nobody.

“You can’t keep living your life being a nobody.”

Nobody doesn’t find it funny.

But seriously, we have nothing to offer this man in this forsaken desert.

“Then I’m sorry.” Nobody turns around, about to drive away. “I can’t help you.”

“Wait,” the Pillar says. “I have something for you.”

What could the Pillar possibly have?

And in a most devastating moment, the Pillar pulls out a golden key and shows it to Nobody.

It’s the key the Hatter took from me.

“Is that what I think it is?” Nobody stares at it with hungry eyes.

I stare at the Pillar as well, only I’m both furious and feeling betrayed.

Did he really fool me last time, playing me all along to get the key?

“It is,” the Pillar tells Nobody. “One of the Six Impossible Keys.”

“Thank you.” Nobody snatches the key from the Pillar’s hands while I’m still cemented in place with disappointment. “Now, tell me what you want exactly?”

“What’s the cure to the plague?” That’s me asking. That’s me talking. It helps me put the Pillar’s betrayal behind my back for now.

“There is no cure,” Nobody says, tucking the key in his pocket.

Furiously, I pull him by his sleeves and roar in his face. “I swear if you don’t tell, I will make a somebody out of you, a somebody you will not like at all.”

“But what I’m saying is true.” He is choking in my hands. I can’t help but notice my violent episodes are increasing. And I’m not sure if I like this side of me. “The man who cooked it said so. A plague that can’t be cured.”

“Who is the man who cooked it?” I tighten my grip.

“They call him the Scientist.”

“No name? Just the Scientist?”

“Yes, I swear to God.”

“Where can I find this Scientist?”

Nobody is reluctant to say for a moment. He glances toward the Pillar, who’s smoking his cigar, fully amused by my anger.

“Tell me!” I shout at Nobody.

His face reddens more, bubbling now, staring pleadingly at the Pillar.

“He’s unable to talk, Alice,” the Pillar remarks. “You think you’re hurting him, but you’re actually killing him.”

My hands snap away from Nobody. I stare at them as if they aren’t mine. What’s happening to me?

“The Scientist lives in Brazil,” Nobody says, breathing heavily. “He is attending a festival at the moment.”

“Having a party while the world is ending,” the Pillar says. “Neat.”

“I’d go find him now if I was you,” the panting Nobody says.

“Suddenly caring about the world?” The Pillar raises an eyebrow.

“You don’t understand,” Nobody says. “It’s not just any festival. It’s the famous Brazilian Hookah festival!”

Nazca Desert, Peru

T
he moment Nobody tells us where to go next, the Pillar’s chopper shows up in the air, ready to pick us up.

“This is when I usually disappear,” Nobody says and starts to frantically pedal away.

“You’re going to let him leave with the key?” the Pillar says.

It’s times like these when I don’t know what to do with him exactly. The kids shouting my name in the air distracts me from staring back at the Pillar. I turn and walk in their direction, smiling like a kid myself.

Again, it’s funny how little things, like a child’s smile, make all the sense in this world of continuous nonsense. Even the Keys to Wonderland don’t matter much all of a sudden.