Hope(less) (6 page)

“That there are more ears than usual,” he tossed over his
shoulder as he opened the door for me, a reminder that others could hear what
we said.  We moved out into the hallway.  A werewolf fun fact to keep in mind
at all times… their excellent hearing.

Sam typically stayed very open with me, but something definitely
felt different about tonight.  I followed him down the hall, our footfalls
echoing softly on the hardwood floor.

Despite my effort to not react in any way to the oddities I
kept noticing, a tension built inside of me.  Not about the Introductions.  I’d
grown used to those.  They could throw as many unmated at me as they wanted.  I
knew it wouldn’t work.  In the two years, not once had I felt any physical
interest in any werewolf.  There’d been some nice ones I’d enjoyed talking to,
but nothing more.  No spark that Sam insisted I’d feel.  He’d stressed that
whatever I felt, the male would feel infinitely stronger, a compulsion that
they wouldn’t be able to deny.

No, the tension kept building as I puzzled over what Sam hid,
whatever made him act so nervous and guilty at the same time.

When we didn’t turn to go to the commons, but instead down
the hall I knew housed the infamous Introduction room, his odd behavior made
sense.  It appeared they would be going old school for my last Introduction.  Sam
had stressed a formal Introduction could be dangerous to me, so I could
understand his nervousness and guilt.  But I didn’t understand why they thought
this necessary.  Did they really think the results would be different?

“Sam, you should have told me first,” I scolded under my
breath, trying to make it as quiet as possible.  I knew others would probably
hear it anyway.

He said nothing as he stopped and opened the door at the end
of the hall.  He motioned me inside.  The windowless room with the same
comfortable log cabin design as the rest of the compound, held only a few chairs
set to the side for Elders to wait and observe.  Having Elders in the room meant
disputes were resolved quickly and without bloodshed.  It also meant better protection
for the female.

Near the center of the room, ten worn X’s taped to the floor
formed a gentle arch.  A few feet away, a solid line ran from one side of the
room to the other, separating the front and back halves of the room.  Each side
had a door.

According to tradition, five werewolves would enter from the
opposite door, which led outside, and remain in the room for five minutes.  The
Elders present would watch my reaction to these werewolves and their reactions
to me.  Five minutes gave enough time for me to introduce myself to them.

It seemed pointless to me though.  Through their own
admission, true mates would know within a minute of meeting each other.

All ten marks came into play during Introductions for older
unmated were-females.  Once Introductions started, unmated males traveled from
distant states until the Elder network announced a claim.

By nature, the males competed aggressively for a mate since
fewer females were available to men.  Sam had told me statistically the birth
rate was about three to one - male to female.  Some thought it nature’s way to
keep the werewolf population low.  Other’s disagreed, arguing with the very
persuasive logic that it didn’t make sense when human females appeared to be evolving
to fill in the need.

Understanding the seriousness of this Introduction, I stood
near the door I’d entered.  If trouble broke out, I would step through the
sturdy, thick door, lock it behind me, and run like hell.  It wouldn’t slow a
determined werewolf.  Without an Elder standing between an oncoming werewolf
and me, I wouldn’t stand a chance.  Declared a safety zone, I would remain in the
hall beyond to wait until the Elders calmed whatever disruption might occur.

Although the setting had changed, the rules hadn’t.  They
couldn’t force this on me.  It was up to Nature.  One more weekend to play it
cool and then… done.

The Elders began to enter behind me.  During the informal Introductions
in the commons, two to three Elders always remained nearby.  If informal Introductions
called for at least two Elders, I knew to expect more for a formal Introduction.

Sam already sat on a folding chair to my left.  Gradually, four
more filed in; four men, including Sam, and one woman.  I’d met Nana Wini two
years ago while still learning about Introductions.  A kind and patient
teacher, she’d explained so much to me.  Having her here comforted me and I
looked forward to talking to her afterward.

Once the last Elder sat, without pause, the outer door
opened and ten men stalked in.  I successfully kept my feelings from my face,
but I knew they would smell my confusion.  Ten?  It explained the extra
protection by the Elders.

Werewolves in their fur were all powerful and vicious, Elders
more so because of their position in the pack.  In addition to the increased
number of Elders, the ages of the werewolves positioning themselves on the X’s
ranged from young to old without restriction.  Screw Nature.  No way would I be
even remotely interested in someone old enough to be my father.  Especially
when I had no clue who my father might be.

Wanting to get the Introduction over with, I stepped forward
so the toes of my socks rested just behind my safety line, and met the eyes of first
man.  Nodding a greeting, I turned with military precision and paced to the
next taped X to meet the second man’s eyes.

Continuing, I slowly walked down the line meeting the eyes
of the third then the fourth, saying, “I’m Gabby.  Thank you for coming.”  I
paced past the fifth and sixth ensuring I made eye contact with all the
werewolves standing on the tape and said, “I’m glad I could meet you.”

Once I’d met the eyes of each man, they all stepped back
from the tape and left.

I stayed on my side of the tape watching their retreating
forms.  The door on their side of the room opened so they could file out.  It
felt weird not learning their names as I usually did in an informal Introduction. 
But I knew this typical of a formal Introduction.  Any interested werewolf
would remain on their taped mark allowing the others to step back to leave. 
This would give Sam a moment to note them.  Anyone on his list would have an
opportunity for a second Introduction where we would actually converse.  The
second round had more danger.

Movement in the recently vacated doorway broke my chain of
thoughts.  The doorway stood empty for only a moment before ten more entered.

Breaking protocol, I glanced at Sam.  He watched the men
entering the room still not making eye contact with me.  Without narrowing my
eyes like I really wanted to, I focused on the men making their way to their marks. 
In this group, all of them aged over forty.  I repeated the process from the
first group meeting each of their eyes and walking past them while introducing
myself.  One appeared to have the start of a black eye.

I thanked them for meeting me and watched one remain on his
mark while the rest marched out.  The remaining man watched Sam make a note
then nodded at me before turning to leave.

Again, ten more filed in as soon as the room emptied.  This felt
wrong.  Too rushed.  They weren’t even waiting the full five minutes once the
men stood on their marks.

Instead of moving forward toward my line, I put my hands
behind my back and kept my eyes on the ground thinking.  The rules said that
the Elders would not interfere unless they perceived danger.  They would not
speak unless it was imperative to my wellbeing to ensure no outside influence
to any decision I might make regarding my choice of mate.  That rule made it
impossible to ask Sam for an explanation and actually get an answer.

Why did they change the pattern now?  Why on the last
visit?  What were they trying to accomplish using this method over the informal
Introductions?  The unmated males entered ten at a time and faster than the
normal five minutes.

I looked at the taped line by my toes.  The crisp tape
looked new even though I’d heard from Henry and Paul, still my best sources of
information these past two years, that it hadn’t been replaced in years.  It looked
new because it had never been walked on, never crossed.  You leave by the door
you enter.  That’s the rule.  Rules are meant to be broken.  Answers waited beyond
the opposite door.

Decided, I looked up and stepped to the line meeting each of
the unmated males’ eyes.  While doing so, I noted dried blood under one
werewolf’s nose.  “It’s nice to meet you,” I said and waited, saying no more. 
As one, they stepped back to leave and the door swung open.

“A moment please,” I called out, pausing their progress before
they reached the door.  All ten turned to look back at me.  I broke protocol
and crossed the line.  Since none of them acknowledged any interest in me, I
hoped I’d be safe enough.  I could feel the Elders watching me, but didn’t look
at them or the unmated males as I walked toward the open door.

“Gabby, wait,” Sam called.

I heard him stand and follow me.  Hearing him caused my
stomach to dip.  It meant stepping through the door could compromise my
wellbeing.  But staying inside wouldn’t get me answers.

Stepping out onto a packed dirt path, I looked around.  The
light spilling from the door behind me illuminated a small area.  Trees crowded
toward the building leaving a small gap of about twenty feet between the tree
line and the roofline, causing early dusk.  In that cleared space surrounding
the back door, I saw about twenty men waiting quietly near the trees.  I
frowned, puzzled.  I’d expected to see much more given the rushed Introductions. 
Something still felt off.

Closing my eyes, I breathed deep, concentrating.  Tiny
sparks flashed around me in the darkness.  Sam, I saw, stood to my right.  His
spark glowed steadily not blinking at all.  The group of twenty was different.

Some of the werewolves’ lights blinked like strobes.  Some
faster, some slower.  Some so slow, I at first thought they might have left. 
As I studied them, it began to make sense.  I wasn’t seeing werewolves running
quickly all over the place, rather an arrhythmic indication of a werewolf’s
location.  I focused beyond the twenty.  Lights too numerous to count stood out
in the darkness.  It would take hours to get through the Introductions.

I opened my eyes already knowing that the group of twenty
had doubled.  I studied their faces noting more bruising and blood.  Some men dressed
in jeans and shirts, while others wore clothes too filthy from fighting to identify. 
Seeing the filth and blood, I understood why they wanted to rush the Introductions. 
Too many werewolves had arrived for this and the mating challenges the Elders
feared had begun.

I didn’t say anything.  I couldn’t.  Anger churned in my
stomach at Sam for not telling me.  I felt tricked and yet sad for the men
waiting.

“Sam,” I said turning my gaze on him.  There was nothing
playful in my look.  I wanted to tell him that I would never forgive him for
this, but knew the werewolves listening would take my words as a rejection.  It
would take away what little hope they had facing these numbers.  Instead, I let
my look conveyed everything I felt.

Had all the prior Introductions been a farce, a game to keep
me from running until they could arrange the real thing?  How strongly were
they determined to see me mated?  Would they let me leave unmated?  Had my
thoughts of college been a dream?  No.  Not a dream.  I wouldn’t give up.

He lowered his gaze breaking eye contact, something he never
did first.  Good.  He knew.

Blinking slowly, I turned away studying the growing crowd. 
I’d lived among them enough to know not to show intimidation.  They respected
strength.  With their hearing, I didn’t need to raise my voice.  Even those
still hidden within the trees would hear me.

“No more fighting.”  Using all the authority I could muster,
I said, “There’s no need to wait and fight for your place in tonight’s Introduction. 
I will meet you all.  Start a line here and I’ll walk it.  If I am not right
for you, there is no need for you to remain after I’ve passed you.  You may
leave and know that I am honored with your presence here tonight.”

Men stepped silently from the trees, moving to create a line
as I’d asked.  With so little space between the building and the tree line, the
line extended around the corner of the building.  Men kept emerging from the
woods until roughly five hundred of them gathered.  Even with the line
extending around the corner, the men crowded several lines deep.  Too many for
a single line.

Starting at the right, toward the front of the wing housing
the Introduction room, I moved to the first man, nodded stoically, and then
turned to start walking slowly down the line.  The Elders kept pace with me.  I
didn’t bother pausing to meet anyone’s eyes.  Only my scent mattered to them.

As I asked, those without a strong interest, turned to walk
back into the woods allowing those behind them to step forward into their place
in line.  I paced the line several times in silence so all would get their fair
chance.  As I paced and the number remaining decreased, my mood lightened.  Sam
made note of names as needed.

Soon only a handful of men remained.  While my future loomed
brighter, theirs dimmed.  I truly felt for them, but I’d experienced no
attraction to any of them… no pull that Sam and other Elders and werewolves had
assured me I would feel when meeting the one.  I nodded solemnly to those
remaining and watched them melt back into the trees.  A triumphant smile wanted
to break free, but I contained it not wanting to offend anyone.  Finally, my
duty was complete.  I breathed deeply of freedom, ready to go back to my room.

Behind me, the Elders moved, reminding me of their
presence.  My mood shifted.  The anger and betrayal from their lack of warning
resurfaced.  With a stiff back and tight mouth, I made my way back toward the
door and the waiting Elders.  I didn’t meet any of their eyes.