A broken sound shot out of her. It rang in his ears as he ran his tongue over the nub he’d already stimulated to a throbbing head. His cock pulsed with need while his stomach muscles tensed and his balls grew so heavy he groaned at the near-pain. Her taste was as perfect as her headlong response, so he braced her back against the counter, opened her legs wider and put his lips around her clit to suck her in.
She screamed. It was airless, so high-pitched it almost had no sound, but it was a scream.
It was the most magnificent sound he’d ever heard.
As much as he longed to keep her wrapped up in that madness forever, he heard the sudden shortening of her gasps and felt the impossible tension thrumming through her body reaching a fever pitch. In a heartbeat he rose, taking her up with him as he did so, her one leg still over his upper arm while he glued his hands to her ass. He plunged into her even as he set her on the edge of the counter, bringing her other leg up to maximize his penetration.
Yes.
Pleasure stabbed into him even as he stabbed into her, impaling his cock into her tight, slick depths again and again until it was all he knew and the sweet sheath gloving his hardened flesh convulsed.
Her voice broke, a wildly abandoned sound that called his name. Hearing it shattered the last of his control. Then he heard nothing but his own roar of satisfaction as he came harder and more sweetly than he ever had in his life.
“This is going to be awkward. Painfully awkward.”
“It’s not going to be awkward.” Rude didn’t roll his eyes—he was too busy scanning the airport’s short-term parking area for a spot—but Sass heard it in his tone. “You’ve known my parents almost half your life. How the hell is picking them up at the airport awkward?”
“I’m picking them up
with you
. That’s how it’s awkward. Oh, look.” She pointed to a car pulling out. “Line yourself up and get in there.”
“That’s what she said.”
She laughed, then decided to be irritated because she didn’t want to laugh, even if it was her favorite kind of joke. But she also didn’t want to be irritated with the man behind the wheel of the black SUV that looked like it could pull double-duty as a tank. She didn’t want to be irritated with him because other than insisting that she accompany him to pick up Mama Coco and Papa Bolo from the airport, Rude had been the brightest spot in a weekend filled with bright spots.
Their flour fight had made an ungodly mess of both the apartment and them, but she’d been content to live with the mess while enjoying the gnocchi they’d eventually made together. As she did, she’d reveled in his company, even as she’d slowly been driven crazy by feel of the pale, pasty crust forming on her skin. Clean-up had been just as much fun as getting dirty, as they’d finally wound up in a hot, steaming shower together.
That was where the tone of their intimacy had changed—or perhaps a better description would have been
deepened
—and if she thought about it, it still freaked her out.
Condoms had always been an absolute staple in her world, holding a place just below oxygen, gravity and sunlight on her list of necessities, despite having been on the Pill since her late teens. It was never a good idea to use a condom in a wet environment like a shower or hot tub, and she’d always avoided that particular scenario because of it. But getting clean with Rude had sounded like so much fun that it had never even crossed her mind.
Even more remarkably, the thought of protection had stayed out of her mind until he’d asked if she was on birth control, and by then he’d had her so aroused with his awesome magic fingers that she’d been more than happy to nod yes. Then her back had been up against the tiled wall, one of her arms around his shoulders for support, the other holding onto the shower’s interior towel bar, and her legs clamped around his hips as he plunged into her like a fucking piston.
Concern over something like an STD was virtually zero, because like her, Rude had a long history of being obsessed with safe sex…until now.
Apparently somewhere along the way, they’d both lost their minds.
She didn’t want to think about what that meant, since she was already wigged out about it. Technically speaking, she knew sensation-wise there would be a slight difference in having nothing between them. But that physical closeness was
nothing
compared to the psychological effect the removal of that barrier was having on her. It was as though some invisible defense she’d had installed around her feelings had also been stripped away. Maybe it was weird, but the physical existence of a condom had somehow represented the comfort of emotional distance for her. Now that it was gone, it was like she was flying without a net. As crazy-exhilarating as that was, there were times when it also had her so scared she could barely breathe.
“Help me remember, Sass, we’re on Level 3, Row D.” An icy blast of wind gusted through the covered garage as they headed toward the terminals. She hunched her shoulders against it before she found herself huddled beneath his arm, his steps quickly guiding her through the automatic doors. His big body’s warmth radiated like a blessing through her tailored trench coat that, while looking fabulous with its wide belt and lapels, wasn’t big on keeping the cold out.
“Damn, that felt like winter.” His arm tightened around her as the doors closed behind them and the bustle of airport madness hit them full-force. “You’re so small I thought you were going to blow away.”
“I hate to say it, but I think it’s time to say goodbye to our nice, mild autumn and get ready to hibernate for the next few months.”
“Hibernating with you could be a lot of fun.” Glancing around at the baggage carousels he looked up at a sign. “Okay, this is international baggage claim. Mom and Dad will be coming in upstairs, on the domestic flight level.”
A crazy fit of nerves struck hard. “Seriously, I could wait here while you—”
“Shut up.” He pulled her onto a long, ascending escalator, stood her on the stair above him, and turned her so that he could look her square in the eyes. “I told you straight up that I’m not going to hide that we’re together, and neither are you”
The arrogance of that statement sparked a hint of anger, and she frowned at him. “You really think you get to dictate to me what I can and can’t do?”
“So you do want to hide that we’re together? You’re ashamed to be with me? You never seemed to care about being with any of the losers you had with you at family get-togethers.”
“Don’t be ridiculous.” Horrified that he’d even say those words aloud, she laid a hand on his cheek and brushed her thumb over his lips, trying to erase the words. “I never cared about being with those guys because they didn’t mean anything to me.
You
do. Oh God,” she interrupted herself with a shocked gasp. “I can’t believe I just said that. But… oh shit, it’s true. You actually mean something to me. I mean, I don’t know what, exactly, but this does explain why I feel like I’m about to throw up all over your shoes.”
“Sassy Pants, it would’ve been great if you’d stopped about a sentence or two back. But I get it,” he added when she looked up at him with a sound of distress. Chuckling in such a manly way she wanted to clobber him, he opened his warm, black wool coat and pulled her flush against him, closing her in a bubble of solid comfort. “You’re coming to care about me, and you care about my parents. You want everyone to be cool with us being together, and it’d break your heart if they didn’t approve. But remember, other people don’t fucking matter, baby. The only people who matter in this relationship are you and me. That’s it.”
“It wouldn’t break my heart if they didn’t approve.” And there she was, once again saying the exact opposite of what she thought, because the disapproval of his family
would
break her heart. Rude was Mama Coco and Papa Bolo’s youngest biological child, whereas she was the youngest of the strays they took in. She came with a lot of baggage—baggage they knew about. Like the loving parents they were, Mama Coco and Papa Bolo no doubt had high hopes for their son to find someone who fit him on every conceivable level. Someone who came from the same kind of solid background that he did, someone who knew how to continue that harmonious and beautiful stability. Someone he could build a life with.
She wasn’t anything like that.
“Sass, look at me.”
Only then did she realize she’d buried her face in his neck. That show of spinelessness pissed her off enough to make her jerk her head up and try to look like she wasn’t completely freaking out. “I’m fine, Rude, okay? Just remember that I’m not into any huge and sloppy PDAs in front of them or anyone in general, all right? Seriously, whenever I see a couple getting into one, I just want to find the nearest hose and—”
The last word got swallowed by his mouth. Hers stilled, then molded against his a half-second later even as her body flowed against his. One of her hands came to slide into his crisp, soft hair, while the other snuck under his coat to cup the curve of his rock-hard, well-toned ass.
God, she adored his ass.
The mental chaos of PDAs, complicated relationships, approval or disapproval over being together with her former enemy vanished, and a wave of peace rolled in. He did this for her, she marveled as she gave herself over to Rude’s kiss. With a touch, a glance, a kiss, he pushed the world away when it was closing in, and he made it quiet inside her. He vanquished her fits of anxiety before they could poison her, and he helped her find the strength to stand tall when she wanted to curl up in her Nowhere Place and hide. She couldn’t help but wonder if he had any clue how much he gave her. If she could give him even a fraction of it back, her world would become just about perfect.
Sass? What the hell…
Sass
?”
Rude’s head lifted and, still lost in the lush heat of his kiss, it took Sass a second to realize someone was calling her name from high above. Blankly she peeked over the lapel of Rude’s coat still wrapped around her, and spotted Scout and Ivar near the top of the descending escalator, arms around each other and loaded down with carry-ons.
“Oh. Scout.” Shocked, Sass felt her face heat when she realized she’d been caught in one those PDAs she supposedly despised, and started to move away. Rude’s arms locked tight, and the message was received loud and clear—she wasn’t going anywhere. “Uh, hey. Welcome back, Mr. and Mrs. Fournier.”
“I’m hyphenating, and what the hell are you doing here?” At last they passed each other, with Scout turning so she could continue to gawk up at them. “Besides kissing Rude, I mean?”
“You’re hyphenating?” This came from Rude, and he also turned to watch the couple descend toward the international baggage carousels. “I think Frankie’s gotten you monogrammed sheets as a welcome home thing, so don’t tell her that, she’ll lose her shi—”
“
Rude
.” Sass put her fingers over his mouth, grinning. “You can’t yell that out in public. They’re little kids around.”
“Geez, you’re going to be like Tonya when you become a mom, I can see it now.” His eyes smiled into hers, and his hand came up to hold her palm to his lips so he could place a lingering kiss in its cradle. “Batshit crazy in love with her kid and hyper-protective over every word that enters that kid’s world.”
When you become a mom…
“Sass, Rude! Wait right there, I’m coming up to you guys.”
Scout’s shout from below skipped off Sass’s brain without leaving a mark. She was too busy wrestling with the enormity of what he’d just said. It was amazing how differently she and Rude viewed the world. He automatically assumed that everyone would live the life his parents had lived—get born, grow up, settle down with a significant other, and start having babies to kick off the cycle all over again. Her thought process, though… it never went down that road. Hell, there wasn’t any road, at least that she could see. She had no assumptions about what her future was going to be, except that maybe it would reflect her past.
And what reflection was that, precisely?
Nothing.
Maybe that meant she had nothing to give a child.
“I don’t know how to be a mom.” The words shot out of her as they topped the escalator. She hopped onto stable ground like the moving stairway was made of lava and turned to face him while tension made her stomach roll up into a ball of acid. “I’ve never even
thought
of being a mom. I can’t mom.”
“Hey.” Catching her by the shoulders, Rude held her in place when she would have run to the other side of the terminal. Or maybe even the other side of the state. “Take a breath and look around you, Sassy. No one’s forcing you to be anything you’re not ready to be, yeah? The world’s not closing in and you’re not ever going to be trapped into anything that doesn’t make you happy. It’s okay to not be okay with things that make you uncomfortable.”
She inhaled slowly, because he was right. She needed the air. “I’m not saying I’m anti-mom. I’ve just never thought of becoming one until this very second, and…” She lifted a furtive shoulder. “It threw me for a second, that’s all. Really. It’s no big deal.”
“For what it’s worth, I think you’d be a first-class mother who’d be a little on the crazy side, like Tonya. You know how rough the world can be, so you’d naturally want to protect your kid from all the bad things that you know are out there.”
The way he put it made her smile, and the last echo of alarm faded. “You think Tonya’s crazy when it comes to Sabrina?”
“Babe, she’s a nut job, but that’s the way it’s supposed to be,” he added, moving to fold his arms around her and lowering his head until his brow rested on hers. “When you have your whole world wrapped up in a single person, going insane is understandable. Suddenly your focus is all about doing everything you can to protect that person and make them happy. That’s how you parent—just love them until you’ve lost your damn mind. It’s not rocket science.”
When he put it like that, it sounded almost easy. “I think I could do that.”
He gave her a squeeze. “I know you can.”
“Is that the way you’re going to do be a dad?”
“Hell, yeah. I’m even looking forward to it. That’s how crazy I already am.”
She smiled, picturing a wildly over-protective Rude holding a baby in his arms, and the mental image spawned a warm glow deep inside. “You’re going to make a great dad someday.”
The arms around her tightened, until she was up on her toes and her mouth was a breath from his. “Someday. But that’s a long way off. Right now all I’m interested in is being the man you can go to when shit gets crazy and you need a place where you can feel safe. You just need to get it through your head that I can be that place for you.”
That warm glow began to burn, so beautifully it took her breath away, and she tried to fight with a quick shake of her head. “I don’t need you to be anything but who you are.” With that, she brought his lips to hers and tried to keep that glow from taking over her world.