How to Date a Werewolf (14 page)

“I’m very sorry. I’ll pay you back for that. Just give me the total.”

“Are you working?” I asked.

“Not exactly. I’m kind of in between jobs at the moment.” He shuffled his cowboy-boot-clad foot.

“Right. Look, Uncle Ernie, I’m not trying to lecture you, but...” All right, so I’d been known to offer a lecture or two in the past. So what? This time he deserved it. “You need to get your act together. There’s a lot at stake for me. I can’t have my customers thinking I run some sort of illegal business, and that’s exactly what they will think.” Or good-looking neighbors might start thinking something shady was going on with my life.

“Everything will be fine. I promise, doll.” He fiddled with his graying ponytail. “Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it.” His amber-colored eyes danced under the lights. He held my chin and a smile yanked at the corners of his mouth.

“Oh, Ernie. I worry about you.” I embraced him. He hugged back.

The woman behind the register eyed us between checking out customers. Her sleek blond ponytail pulled at the skin around her eyes, adding emphasis to her annoyed expression. Jennifer hid behind a rack of panties, waiting for the commotion to quiet. The pink hue of her cheeks matched the store, and let me know she was embarrassed by the attention Ernie had attracted.

“By the way, did you just follow us here in a black car?” I pulled away from our embrace. That was a stupid question for me to ask. Of course he hadn’t. Uncle Ernie wouldn’t be brandishing a gun. Unless I’d only imagined a gun. The mind can see funny things sometimes.

“No, I’m in my truck. The big red one, you know.” He glanced over his shoulder and blew a kiss in the general vicinity of the area outside the store.

I looked over his shoulder for the recipient of the air kiss. “Yeah, but did you follow us?” Maybe the black car tried to chase Ernie when he followed us. Everything seemed so confusing. My head spun with the mayhem.

“No, I just happened to be in the mall and I spotted you. I’ve been meaning to stop by and see you for some time now.”

It was better that he didn’t. I needed his drama around me like I needed a bottle of Rogaine.

“See that woman out there?” Uncle Ernie pointed toward the front of the store.

A tall, lanky woman with multicolored hair stood outside the door and picked at her nails. Was her hair mostly blond, red or brown? I had no clue. All colors mingled throughout her mane. Oh well, it didn’t matter, because Ernie seemed pleased--based upon the expression on his face. If he liked her, then I liked her. She was fine by me.

“Yes, I see her.” How could I not with her rainbow hair.

“She’s my lady friend. She works here at the mall, over at Bath and Body Works.”

Hmm, I wondered if she could get me a discount. They had an incredible lotion that helped with razor burn.

“I’m very serious about her. She might be the one. And the sex is--”

“Please. I feel queasy as it is. I’m thrilled to hear she might be the one. But I just don’t need the details. I’m very happy for you.” I frowned and took another long look at the woman. More details about her, other than the sex, would have been nice because lord knows my mother would ask, but I didn’t feel like going into that discussion. Not to mention, I didn’t have the time. My hot date would be waiting.

“Listen, I’ve got to skedaddle. Tell your dad I’ll call him soon. And you take care, sweetheart,” Ernie said.

I nodded as Ernie squeezed me in another big hug. “Be careful,” I whispered.

Ernie scampered out of the store while I glanced around the space to see how many frowning faces watched.

When the excitement died down, Jennifer slid back over. “What was that about?”

“Honestly, I have no idea.” I really didn’t want to talk about it. If we could just pick out my underoos and get the heck out of there, I’d be one happy camper.

“All right. Now that that’s over, let’s find you some sexy little things that will blow Jack’s mind. You’ll look so hot he won’t be able to resist.”

“I still don’t know why I let you talk me into this. He’s not going to see anything under my clothing.” Although, if my dream was any indication, maybe soon he would. That was one dream I wouldn’t mind coming true.

“Rylie, Rylie, Rylie.” She shook her head in pity. “Are you serious? I’ve seen the way you look at him. If I poured steak sauce on him, it would be all over. Drool leaks out of your mouth whenever you catch a glimpse of him. And he ogles you the same way.”

“He does not.” I chuckled. “What kind of steak sauce are we talking here?”

Jennifer rolled her eyes, then swept me over to another display and snatched up coordinating lacy garments. I had a feeling I wouldn’t get much say in what I chose.

But things were moving along nicely, and I figured in no time at all I’d be out of there and on my way to dream-date time. Until, in a flash, that all changed.

Chapter 9

How to Date a Werewolf Rule # 9:

“Big Bad Wolf” is not a pet name.

So many styles and so many sizes. With my head buried under a rack, I searched for my size, then Jennifer screamed.

“Oh. My. God. Is Lily wearing a t-shirt that says
Get a Mate Is a Fake
?”

“What did you just say? Ouch.” I whacked my head on the display on my way up. A nice goose egg would be an attractive accessory for a lovely evening. Maybe I could disguise it as a hat.

“You heard me. Look. I can’t believe it,” she said.

I scanned the area for Lily. My mouth fell open.

“Unless my eyes are seeing things, yes, she is wearing the extremely clever expression across a shirt. I need to make her eat that shirt.” Lily wore a very noticeable bright pink shirt.

“Do you think she copyrighted that slogan?”

“Ugh. Very funny. Why is everyone following me while I’m trying to buy underwear? Couldn’t they at least do it when I’m buying, oh, I don’t know, say laundry detergent?”

“I’ll say one thing, she’s clever. I’ll give her that. Maybe she should be in the marketing business. What did you say she does again?” she asked.

“She’s a nurse.” I smirked.

“What? She treats sick people? I hope I never end up in her hospital.” She winced.

“I can’t believe her.” I threw down the bras. “She’s officially stalking me. Is she looking at us?” I diverted my eyes so she wouldn’t know I had spotted her. “Try not to let her see you looking her way. Please just let her go away.”

“Oh, she just saw me eyeing her,” Jennifer whispered.

“Damn. I hope she doesn’t cause a scene.” Lily had to be the person who followed us earlier. It wasn’t a coincidence she was here at the same time. It wasn’t as if she lived close by. No, I was convinced she had been in that dark sedan, following us all the way here. But did she really have a gun? My imagination had probably played tricks on me.

Lily had a bitter smile plastered on her face. If the store employees thought my Uncle Ernie was bad wait until they got a load of Lily the Lupine.

“You think she was the one following us?”

“Had to be.”

Lily strolled around the store, acting as if she didn’t know we existed. My gaze followed every move she made, since she now knew we were aware of her presence. I’d have to be on guard. She could make a move at any moment.

She picked up a bra, set it down, then picked up a lotion from the round table in the middle of the store. She studied the lacy unmentionables with a menacing smirk on her face and, all the while, watched me from the corner of one evil little eye. Then she strutted to the back of the store, apparently ignoring us. I didn’t know what her next move would be, but it couldn’t be good. What did she want from me? I felt as if she wanted me to suffer, maybe feel her heartache.

“Come on, we’ll ignore her. If we don’t acknowledge her, she’ll leave. You need to try on these bras. Now march to the fitting room.” Jennifer had amassed bras in her arms, one of each color and style.

“What for? I told you my size. I don’t need to try them on. Plus, we don’t have the time. I want to get out of here.”

“I know for a fact you say you’re a B cup when in fact you are an A cup.” She grabbed my arm and escorted me toward the dressing room. Lily was in the back of the store at that point, pretending not to notice us. She knew where we moved, though, as if she had eyes in the back of her head. Hell, for all I knew she did.

“I’m a
full
A. Thank you very much. And I don’t even want to know how you know that little detail.” I pretended to be offended. To keep my delusion of being a B cup alive, I puffed out my chest. We’d been best friends for too long for her to not know my real cup size, and I knew it.

She pushed me into the tiny dressing room and tried wedging her body in next to mine.

“It is too small in here for you too. Wait outside,” I said as I shut the door in her face.

She stuck out her tongue as the door shut. I shimmied out of my blouse and bra.

Stuffed into the garments Jennifer chose, I yelled out to her. “Hey, this black one with the little pink ribbons really makes my boobs look bigger.” I studied my reflection, admiring the pretty black and pink bra. I didn’t have much to work with, but every bit of help I could get I’d take.

“And, boy, do you need that.”

“Argh.” I jumped back and hit the side of the little partition, almost falling down. “What the hell? What are you doing?”

“That bra doesn’t help you much. The only help for you is a surgeon.”

“You’re crazy, do you know that?” I held my shirt over my chest.

Lily’s face peeked down at me from over the top of the adjacent dressing room. How the hell she’d slipped in there without us noticing, I’d never know.

Jennifer burst through the door. “What the heck are you screaming about in here?” There was no need to answer her when she looked up to see Lily’s wild eyes staring down at us. Lily glared with her usual devilish smirk, clearly very proud of her feat.

“Shoo. Shoo.” Jennifer swatted in the general direction of Lily’s face with a thong. She tiptoed, trying to reach the top, stretching as high as she could. I didn’t even want to know how Lily managed to climb up there.

“Is everything all right in here?” The woman’s name tag read
Beth
and underneath
Manager
. Uh-oh. We would surely be kicked out of the store faster than I could say Miracle Bra. Beth tapped her foot and eyed us like we were insane. Heck, we probably were. She frowned and placed her hands on her narrow hips. She wore black pants and a black low-cut V-neck blouse, apparently the store uniform. Her hair and eyes matched the dark shade. Beth’s mouth was set in a thin line as she waited for an answer. Lily slinked away as if nothing were out of sorts.

“Everything’s fine. I’ll take everything. And this one too as soon as I change into my clothing.” I pointed to the bra that I wore and then handed her every other garment in the room. Jennifer couldn’t complain about my lack of intimates now. I had plenty, thanks to nuttier-than-a-pecan-pie Lily.

The door to my dressing room was wide open, and several people gawked. One woman grabbed her husband and escorted him away from the scene. Lily waltzed out of the store as if she never gave her actions a second thought--her mission accomplished. Apparently, she was on cloud nine after having embarrassed me. Jennifer looked down and walked to the other side of the store. Far away from me.

The manager rang up the items and stuffed them into a bag. I hotfooted it out the door.

“Jen, wait up. It was your idea to go shopping in the first place.” I sprinted to catch up. She was already at the glass doors. She mumbled something and shook her head.

Every noise or person made me jump. I expected Lily to pop out at any moment. To my surprise, she was nowhere in sight. It wouldn’t be long until she came prowling around again, though. I needed to be ready for her next time. I made my way out the door and smacked right into Martin’s chest.

“Oh, I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”

Jennifer turned around and watched us.

“Hi, Rylie. What are you doing here?” he asked.

“Um, shopping.” I gestured toward my bag.

“Duh, of course. It’s just I’m surprised to run into you here.”

“Yeah, well, I was doing a little shopping.”

He looked down at the pink bag and I could have sworn he tried to sneak a peek at my lingerie purchase.

“It was nice seeing you again,” I said.

He beamed and I hoped he didn’t take the last part of the conversation literally.

“It was nice seeing you too,” he said as I walked away.

I waved over my shoulder.

“So that was Martin,” Jennifer said as she opened the car door.

As I plopped down in the car, I said, “Yes, that’s him. I can’t believe I forgot to tell you. He came in to see me today.” I threw my shopping bag in the backseat.

“Who?” Jennifer climbed behind the steering wheel.

“You know, Martin. Lily’s ex-main squeeze for all of two weeks. He asked me out.”

“Get out. No wonder she’s following you. You’ve been trying to steal her man. What did he say?” She guided the car back onto the road.

I looked around. So far no one appeared to be following us. “I am not trying to steal her man. I don’t think Lily even knows he was there to see me and ask me out. But, if she does, it’s because he told her. Or she has a wiretap in my office. Which, actually, wouldn’t surprise me.”

“So he asked you out? What did you say?” Jennifer had resumed her mild-mannered driving persona. She steered the car onto the highway.

“I declined, of course. I told him I couldn’t date clients. He wanted me to pretend he wasn’t a client anymore.”

“Ouch. I can’t imagine being in your shoes. That’s a sticky situation,” she said.

“Tell me about it. Poor guy. I offered to fix him up with someone else.”

“Good luck with that,” she said.

“Okay, I’m going to ask again, and don’t tell me it’s top secret. Why did you take a defensive driving course?” I asked.

“Court ordered.” Jennifer didn’t take her eyes off the road.