How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (14 page)

BOOK: How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series)
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“I will stop thinking about cigarettes.”

“God is ashamed of me for smoking.”

“God will punish me for smoking.”

Living under the “law” never changes you. If you focus only on what you shouldn’t do, you will be pulled more powerfully to do it.

 

“The power of sin is the law”

(1 C
ORINTHIANS
15:56).

Hitting the Target with Positive Truth


Target #1
:
God’s purpose
for me is to display Christ’s character.

– “Christ lives in me to conform my character into His character.”

– “I will glorify Christ by accurately representing Him to everyone I encounter.”

– “I will yield to His control and do what is best for my body and my spirit.”


Target #2
:
God’s priority
for me is to change my thinking.

– “Christ lives in me to give me the strength to change my thought patterns.”

– “I will release my guilt to God and gain control over my thinking to line it up with God’s thinking.”

– “I will replace my defeated thinking with positive promises of victory from God’s Word.”


Target #3
:
God’s plan
for me is to rely on Christ’s power to change me.

– “Christ lives in me to change me.”

– “I will give Christ increasing control of my life and my habit in order to taper off gradually.”

– “I will give Christ total control of my life and my habit in order to quit cold turkey.”

 

E
XAMPLE OF
H
ITTING
T
ARGET
#3

B
REAKING THE
H
ABIT OF
S
MOKING

Those who break the habit of smoking either taper off or go cold turkey.

Tapering Off

“I will give Christ increasing control of my life and my smoking habit in order to taper off gradually.”


By carrying a limited number of cigarettes for each day along with a gradual cutback schedule


By limiting buying cigarettes to only certain days of the month


By buying only one pack at a time


By entrusting my cigarettes to a friend so that I have to ask for one or by keeping them in an inconvenient place


By setting restrictions on when, where, and around whom I will smoke (outside, when I take a walk around the block, not around loved ones, etc.)


By breaking patterns of when I would normally smoke (not smoking while on the phone, immediately after a meal, in the car, before going to sleep)


By making myself accountable to someone who is willing to help


By memorizing and personalizing 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 and dwelling on it when I want a cigarette

 

“Do you not know that your [my] body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you [me], whom you [I] have received from God? You are [I am] not your [my] own; you were [I was] bought at a price. Therefore [I will] honor God with your [my] body”

(1 C
ORINTHIANS
6:19-20).

Quitting Cold Turkey

“I will give Christ total control of my life and my smoking habit in order to quit cold turkey.”


By refusing to purchase cigarettes


By not looking at cigarette ads


By choosing not to dwell on the “comfort” of smoking


By doing another preplanned activity when I desire a cigarette (especially doing something with my hands)


By finding a substitute when I want something in my mouth (chewing gum, hard candy, ice, or a toothpick)


By eliminating the unnecessary activities that cause me to want to smoke


By memorizing Romans 14:21 and 1 Corinthians 6:12

 

“It is better not to eat meat or drink wine or to do anything else that will cause your brother to fall”

(R
OMANS
14:21).

Negative Reinforcement

Q
UESTION
:
“What is negative reinforcement?”

A
NSWER
:
Negative reinforcement means presenting negative truths or reasonings to aid with decision making. For example, “What is the
truth
about tobacco?

Tobacco smoke contains more than 200 known poisons. Those who smoke two packs a day shorten their life expectancy by eight years. Tobacco…
61


Is the most common cause of lung cancer


Is a major cause of hardening of the arteries, which in turn causes strokes and most heart attacks


Is a major contributor in mouth and throat cancers, which can disfigure a person for life


Causes emphysema, making breathing very taxing, which in turn causes death


Produces chemicals that erode the lining of the stomach, which in turn causes gastric ulcers


Increases the risk of bladder cancer


Slows down physical healing


Produces carbon monoxide and retards the growth of a fetus in a mother who smokes, which also increases the risk of premature birth and infant death


Contributes to heart disease, the leading cause of death in men

 

“‘Everything is permissible’

but not everything is beneficial
.

‘Everything is permissible’—but everything is not constructive”

(1 C
ORINTHIANS
10:23).

Chewing Tobacco

Q
UESTION
:
“Isn’t chewing tobacco better than smoking tobacco?”

A
NSWER
:
Absolutely not! Apart from the obvious yellow teeth stains and unpleasant taste (especially for the spouses of users), smokeless tobacco…
62


Causes cavities and tooth decay due to high quantities of sugar


Possesses coarse particles that damage gums and erode tooth enamel


Can lead to gum and tooth disease


Is a common cause of mouth and throat cancer


Can cause leukoplakia


Contributes to increased heart rate and blood pressure


Increases the incidents of heart disease and heart attack

The American Academy of Otolaryngology states that spit, chewing, and smokeless tobacco are “not a safe alternative to smoking. You just move health problems from your lungs to your mouth,” providing a more potent nicotine rush to the blood.
63

 

“The prudent see danger and take refuge but the simple keep going and suffer for it”

(P
ROVERBS
27:12).

Smoking

Q
UESTION
:
“What does God think about smoking?”

A
NSWER
:
According to 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, smoking is a sin against the physical body because it causes sickness, disease, and possibly early death. But your salvation is not contingent upon it. Romans 10:9-10 says, “If you confess with your mouth, ‘Jesus is Lord,’ and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved.” God’s desire is for us to walk in freedom from any addiction or unhealthy habit. God’s plan for our lives is good, and if we choose to shorten our lives due to this kind of vice, we may miss opportunities of ministry and the privilege of touching the lives of other people whom He had planned for us to influence.

 

“I urge you, brothers, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God—this is your spiritual act of worship”

(R
OMANS
12:1).

Compulsive Spending

Q
UESTION
:

H
ow can I stop my compulsive spending?”

A
NSWER:
You must first discover the need you are trying to meet through compulsive spending. What is the driving force behind it? Then you must commit to trusting God to meet your need and determine to please the Lord in the way you manage the financial resources He gives you.

 

Before you purchase anything, ask yourself:

“Is this purchase a true
need
or just a
desire
?”

“Do I have adequate funds to purchase this without using credit?”

“Have I compared the cost of competitive products?”

“Have I prayed about this purchase?”

“Have I been patient in waiting on God’s provision?”

“Do I have God’s peace regarding this purchase?”

“Does this purchase conform to the purpose God has for me?”

“Is there agreement with my spouse [if you are married] or accountability partner about this purchase?”

 

“Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions”

(L
UKE
12:15).

 

In order not to be caught off guard or fall into deeper debt, make a plan that includes some of these practical steps that will enable you to develop healthy spending habits.

B
REAKING THE
H
ABIT OF
O
VERSPENDING
64


Avoid preferred shops and pick new stores to make your needed purchases.


Check with stores before leaving home to ensure they have the things you need.


Confine orders from catalogs, the Internet, and TV shopping channels to only those items already on your shopping list.


When you feel the desire to go shopping divert your attention to another enjoyable activity.


Keep only one credit card for emergencies.


Limit your window shopping to after hours or when you have no means of making purchases.


Never shop when you are tired, depressed, excited, or lonely.


Plan your shopping trips to tempting locations late in the day so you will arrive with just enough time to limit yourself to purchasing necessities before the doors close.


Put off buying anything you are hesitant about purchasing.


Shop only when you have a shopping list, and purchase only items that are on the list.


Tell your spouse, friend, or shopping buddy exactly what you plan to buy when you shop.


Use cash, check, or debit card when you make your purchase.


Use mail-order catalogs to purchase specific items only, not for browsing or compiling a list of items for purchase.


When thinking about purchasing an item, ask yourself:
Do I really need this? Can I afford it?

T
HE
P
LAN FOR
F
UTURE
P
URCHASES


Formulate a realistic weekly, monthly, quarterly, and yearly budget with the help of a financially responsible person, and keep to it.


Develop and implement a savings plan.


Enter purchases in your checkbook and deduct them from your balance on the day they occur or within the next few days.


Start a list of any expensive items you would like to purchase in the future, do three cost comparisons on each item, and then determine when you can realistically save the money to purchase each item.


Disclose all of your purchases and the cost of each to your spouse, friend, or accountability partner.


Purchase and wrap gifts early for loved ones you will be visiting throughout the year in order to avoid making superfluous or more expensive purchases during your visits.

 

Pray before walking into a store to purchase an item and ask, “Lord, is this a hasty decision or a well-planned one? Is this just my will or Your perfect will?” Remember…

“The plans of the diligent lead surely to plenty, but those of everyone who is hasty, surely to poverty”

(P
ROVERBS
21:5
NKJV
).

F. How to Help with Accountability Questions

Bethany Hamilton would be the first to say she has not made the journey from shark-attack victim to national surfing champ alone. It would be difficult to imagine a more supportive family than hers. Along with them, friends, fans, and a close-knit church community have cheered this surfer continuously.

Encouragement is important. But when it comes to shedding old habits, learning new ones, and achieving goals once thought unobtainable, nothing is more critical than accountability. For Bethany, that has come, first and foremost, in the form of her surfing coaches. She admits, “There are times when the last thing I feel like doing is running another mile…” And that is why she has a coach who pushes her “farther and harder than I ever think I (or any human!) can go.”
65

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