How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (6 page)

BOOK: How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series)
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A. What Is Characteristic of All Habits?

In 2007, the hidden habits of Michael Vick exploded into public view. A police raid on Vick’s Bad Newz Kennels in rural Virginia turned up gruesome evidence of a savage dogfighting operation. Investigators alleged that for six years, Vick and friends from his childhood bought, bred, and sold pit bulls, which fought to the death in kennel matches with gambling purses as high as $26,000.
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Ghastly reports of barbaric cruelty began to emerge. Dogs that lost fights or didn’t perform well had been tortured mercilessly—beaten, shot, drowned, electrocuted. International media pounced on the news with the ferocity of Vick’s own vicious pit bulls. The public outcry was deafening, the revulsion palpable.

In truth, pit bulls simply behave as they are trained. They develop learned behaviors and, consequently, can become brutal killers, or beloved pets, or brilliant service dogs for law enforcement, search and rescue teams, and therapy.
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In the same way, a habit is a
learned behavior
that becomes a powerful force in your life, whether for good or bad, for virtue or vice. And, in the end, all wrong habits—whether perceived as good or bad—lead to death.

“There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death”

(P
ROVERBS
16:25).

A
LL
H
ABITS
A
RE

H H
ABITUAL
—They occur with regularity.

A A
UTOMATIC
—They happen without thinking.

B B
EHAVIORAL
—They outwardly reflect inner morals and character.

I I
NTENSE
—They grow stronger and more ingrained with repetition.

T T
ENACIOUS
—They persist and become hard to change over time.

S S
ATISFYING
—They are purposeful and provide a degree of pleasure.

 

Your habits reflect your heart and communicate your devotion either to God or to the things of this world.

“No servant can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other”

(L
UKE
16:13).

B. What Constitutes Four Categories of Habits?

Upon being indicted by a federal grand jury for dogfighting and other charges, Michael Vick’s impulse was to…lie. Habitually. He lied to the media, the public, teammates, team owners, and eventually to a federal grand jury and judge.
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Especially heartbroken by the immense betrayal was Atlanta Falcons’ owner Arthur Blank, who had “bet the future of the franchise on the young quarterback, awarding him the largest contract in the history of the NFL…and stood by him as the charges piled up and Vick fell from grace.”
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Still, Vick had no intention of halting his harmful habits, daringly defiant of the lifelong consequence that lay in wait. Michael was like those described in Romans 1:21:

“Although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.”

Scripture uses words like “strongholds,” “slavery,” and “bondage” to paint a picture of being a prisoner to sin. Although you may not be enslaved to the more visible vices (e.g., drunkenness, gambling, or gluttony), you may be held captive to a seemingly “acceptable activity.” Even behavior that appears “good,” such as volunteer work, can be wrongly motivated and overindulged to the degree that it goes beyond God’s will and thus becomes sin.

No behavior, whether viewed as harmless or helpful, is to have mastery over us. If it does, then it has enslaved us. The Bible clearly states, “A man is a slave to whatever has mastered him” (2 Peter 2:19).

Harmless Habits

Some habits are common to many but cause injury to none. They are at best innocuous and at worst irritants (e.g., nail biting and hair twirling, cracking knuckles and popping gum, belching and bellowing). The Bible offers this insight: “A fool shows his annoyance at once, but a prudent man overlooks an insult” (Proverbs 12:16).

Heart Habits

The heart that is not right in God’s sight produces wrong attitudes and emotions that result in ungodly “heart habits” (e.g., envy and jealousy, prejudice and pride, ungratefulness and unforgiveness). The Bible directly states this truth: “Out of the heart come evil thoughts” (Matthew 15:19; see Jeremiah 17:9).

Hidden Habits

Some habitual actions are often not recognized as harmful addictions because they are not recognized as being habitual or regarded as being negative. They are viewed as “good behaviors” done to excess, which turns them into “bad” behaviors and “hidden habits” (e.g.,
excessively
helping and rescuing others, working and cleaning, apologizing and procrastinating, shopping and spending). The Bible cautions against such excess: “The man who fears God will avoid all extremes” (Ecclesiastes 7:18).

Hard Habits/Addictions

Destructive habits create a damaging climate for everyone, making them “hard habits” (e.g., verbal and emotional abuse, drunkenness and divisiveness, vulgarity and violence, stealing). The Bible explains, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death” (Proverbs 14:12; see also Galatians 5:19-21).

Imelda—Compulsive Spending and Her Shoes, Shoes, and More Shoes

It was a compulsive shopping spree that lasted 20 years, and millions of Filipino people believe they footed the tab.

At the side of the corrupt President Ferdinand Marcos, his wife, Imelda Marcos, believed she was “a symbol of pride of the Philippines” and that her impoverished people expected her to wear expensive jewelry, clothing, and shoes—
lots
of shoes .
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The photos released in the late 1980s stunned the world—Imelda posing beside her shoe collection, a casual “Exhibit A” that supported allegations of gross corruption. The grand total tallied…2,700 pairs of shoes!

That’s when the calculations began: If Imelda wore a different pair of shoes every day, it would take over seven years to “see her store” of shoes. And if she changed shoes three times a day and never wore the same pair twice, it would take almost two-and-a-half years for her to stroll through her colossal collection. And because of her compulsive spending, Imelda most assuredly would continue to make many more additional purchases. Obviously, hundreds, if not thousands, of shoes would have never actually been worn.
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Following the ouster and exile of Ferdinand Marcos in 1986, subsequent Filipino governments accused the notorious pair of stealing $10 billion.
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These governments tried to recover their losses, but to little avail. Despite hundreds upon hundreds of lawsuits and court cases, neither Ferdinand nor Imelda ever saw prison time. Ferdinand died in exile in Hawaii in 1989. Imelda—nicknamed the “Iron Butterfly”—was indicted and convicted, but her cases were either overturned or dismissed due to technicalities.

The alleged $10 billion theft by Ferdinand and Imelda bought a lot more than just shoes: two palaces, dozens of country homes, private and commercial real estate in New York, crates of gold and pesos, and plenty of reserves in bank accounts around the world. In 1978 at a price tag of $10 million, Imelda began building the Coconut Palace, a presidential guesthouse on Manila Bay that was constructed with chemically treated coconut lumber. All elements of the coconut tree were used to create the tropical palace, which was completed in 1981.

Imelda had hoped her first guest would be Pope John Paul II, for whom the Coconut Palace was actually commissioned. But the pope declined. Given the backdrop of a poverty-stricken nation, he perceived the idea of such a stay as ostentatious.
25

The spending habits of both Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos stand in stark contrast to the life of Christ and couldn’t be more contrary to the call of Scripture. Instead of compulsive buying, Jesus says, “Sell your possessions and give to the poor. Provide purses for yourselves that will not wear out, a treasure in heaven that will not be exhausted, where no thief comes near and no moth destroys. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Luke 12:33-34).

C. What Characterizes Those Controlled by Addictions?

Alone in prison, Michael Vick began considering the vast weight of his wrongdoings…and the gracious God of his youth. He contemplated his high school years, when he’d given his life to Christ and first begun reading the Bible. Finally, his future became clear: “The only thing I could do in prison was fall back on God,” he said. “I wanted to do things right.”
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As Vick yielded to Christ, his life began a remarkable transformation. Tony Dungy, retired coach of the Indianapolis Colts, began mentoring the imprisoned athlete. After his release, Vick began working with The Humane Society, traveling the country, speaking at churches, schools, and community events, imploring would-be dog fighters and gamblers to shun the gruesome sport that ravaged his life.

In 2009, Vick was reinstated into the NFL and went on to play for the Philadelphia Eagles. The following year, he became the Eagles’ starting quarterback. In 2010, he played in his fourth career Pro Bowl, was named the Associated Press Comeback Player of the Year, and received the prestigious Ed Block Courage Award for steadfast commitment to sportsmanship and courage.
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Bad choices replaced by good ones led Vick to finally achieve what God had in mind for him all along—a yielded life—a life not controlled by addictive behaviors but by God. Certain characteristics are common among those who, like Vick, repeatedly practice addictive behaviors. These characteristics become so automatic that those who have them are often oblivious to their destructive damage.

Those controlled by addictive habits…
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Become mastered by multiple bad habits

Even though the Bible says, “‘Everything is permissible for me’—but not everything is beneficial. ‘Everything is permissible for me’—but I will not be mastered by anything” (1 Corinthians 6:12).


Don’t obey the law or those in authority

Even though the Bible says, “Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities” (Romans 13:1).


Think their addictions resolve their problems and give them peace

Even though the Bible says, “If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river” (Isaiah 48:18).


Don’t keep their bodies pure or treat them with respect

Even though the Bible says, “Let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit” (2 Corinthians 7:1).


Do not practice self-denial, self-discipline, or self-control

Even though the Bible says, “The grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men. It teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age” (Titus 2:11-12).

D. What Is a Harmful Habit Checklist?

During the course of Michael Vick’s fall from football fame—and his reinstatement to the game—he lost many of his previous fans, but then gained many new ones. Still others remain in a wait-and-see mode, skeptical that his conversion may be one merely of convenience. Neither fans, detractors, nor skeptics, however, are nearly as important to Vick as the peace he says he has made with his Lord. “The main thing is, I don’t want to disappoint God.”
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