How to Defeat Harmful Habits (Counseling Through the Bible Series) (8 page)

“Does it diminish my witness for Christ?”

Let David’s prayer be your own personal prayer:

“Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting”

(P
SALM
139:23-24).

At the 2000 Olympics in Sydney, Australia, Marion Jones won three gold medals in the 100-meter, 200-meter, and 1600-meter relay, as well as two bronze medals in the long jump and 400-meter relay. Her strong, athletic build and speed, along with her sweet smile, charmed the world and challenged young women to pursue their Olympic dreams.

But seven years later, those medallions of achievement no longer hung from the track and field queen’s neck. They were taken away by the International Olympic Committee, leading to Jones’ painful admission: “Making the wrong choices and bad decisions can be disastrous.”
³⁰

“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it”

(H
EBREWS
12:11).

From September 2000 to July 2001, Marion Jones trained more intensely than ever and had improved her running times and recovery periods. But the peak performances weren’t due to modifications in diet and exercise. Jones had gotten swallowed up in the performance-enhancing promises of steroids, and they were paying off.

Her former coach originally told her he was giving her flaxseed oil, but she later realized it was an illegal substance, something Jones emphatically denied publicly for years. In 2004 she made the following statement: “I have never, ever used performance-enhancing drugs.”
³¹
However, misguided choices marred her reputation.

“If anyone competes as an athlete, he does not receive the victor’s crown unless he competes according to the rules”

(2 T
IMOTHY
2:5).

Marion Jones’ misplaced dependency on performance-enhancing drugs led to catastrophic consequences for her. The need to excel, to maintain an edge over her competitors, to retain her five Olympic medals drove Jones not only to lie to the public for years about her habitual steroid use but also to federal investigators. In 2008 she served a six-month federal prison sentence for those lies as well as for her involvement in a check fraud scam.
³²
The Bible says, “There are six things the L
ORD
hates, seven that are detestable to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked schemes, feet that are quick to rush into evil, a false witness who pours out lies and a man who stirs up dissension among brothers” (Proverbs 6:16-19) .

The deepest longing of the human heart is to have intimacy with God through a loving, personal relationship with Him. God created each of us with this desire to seek Him. He knows He alone can fulfill us, and anything less will ultimately fail us! Everything and everyone except God is subject to death or decay, destruction or dissipation.

“You, O L
ORD
, sit enthroned forever;
your renown endures through all generations…
In the beginning you laid the foundations of the earth
,
and the heavens are the work of your hands
.
They will perish, but you remain;
they will all wear out like a garment
.
Like clothing you will change them and they will be discarded
.
But you remain the same, and your years will never end”

(P
SALM
102:12,25-27).

Uncontrolled habits often represent our own attempt to meet our God-given inner needs for love, significance, and security through unhealthy dependencies on people, things, or activities.
³³

As you examine your habits, give honest answers to the following questions:

•
Are you seeking to meet your inner need
for unconditional love through sensual pleasure?

The Bible says,

“Among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity…Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving”

(E
PHESIANS
5:3-4).

God created you to have a loving, personal relationship with Him:

“The L
ORD
appeared to us in the past, saying: ‘I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness’”

(J
EREMIAH
31:3).

•
Are you seeking to meet your inner need
for significance through achievement?

The Bible says,

“Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him”

(C
OLOSSIANS
3:17).

God created you to find your significance in His relationship with you:

“‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the L
ORD
, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future’”

(J
EREMIAH
29:11).

•
Are you seeking to meet your inner need
for security through acquisitions?

The Bible says,

“He who fears the L
ORD
has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge”

(P
ROVERBS
14:26).

God created you to be secure in His relationship with you:

“You also were included in Christ when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory”

(E
PHESIANS
1:13-14).

Unfortunately, many of our efforts to meet these three inner needs have little or no connection to the provisions and promises of God. If you have developed behavioral patterns that make you
dependent
on anything or anyone other than your heavenly Father, you can find freedom by
seeking Him
now!

“‘You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,’ declares the L
ORD
, ‘and will bring you back from captivity’”

(J
EREMIAH
29:13-14).

Before the sober-faced judge, Marion Jones called herself what she believed was her new identity:
a liar and a cheat
. But what she felt she had become didn’t have to be permanent. Change is always possible; forgiveness is always available.

Following her court appearance, Marion read,

It’s with a great amount of shame that I stand before you and tell you that I have betrayed your trust. I have been dishonest and you have the right to be angry with me. I have let them [her family] down, I have let my country down, and I have let myself down. I recognize that by saying I’m deeply sorry, it might not be enough and sufficient to address the pain and hurt that I’ve caused you. Therefore, I want to ask for your forgiveness for my actions, and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me.
³⁴

What “music” to God’s ears!

“The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise”

(P
SALM
51:17).

As happened with Marion Jones, behavior springs from beliefs, and what you tell yourself greatly influences your actions. If you are struggling with trying to overcome a bad habit but having little success, it may be that you are entertaining self-defeating thoughts. You need to be aware that

“the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart”

(H
EBREWS
4:12).

Check the list of wrong beliefs below to see whether your thoughts are helping or hurting your efforts to rid yourself of an un-Christlike habit.

“I cannot control this habit. It’s simply too strong for me.”

“It shouldn’t be this difficult to change; something must be wrong with me.”