How to Ditch Your Fairy (8 page)

Days walking: 63

Demerits: 5

Conversations with Steffi: 8

Doos clothing acquired: 0

Game suspensions: 1

Public service hours: 3

Hours spent enduring Fiorenze

Stupid- Name’s company: 2.75

W
e should have been given several demerits. We arrived less than a minute before the bel (that’s one), our ties crooked (two), our hair messy (three), shirts untucked (four), the echo of our yeling (five), only just faded away. We were laughing and panting and then Steffi hugged me and the sensation of him being so close, of inhaling his sweat, feeling the heat rising from our bodies, drove al thoughts from my head. It was so intensely sublime that when he let go of me I almost fainted. But hugging like that should have been our sixth demerit. (It’s only okay if you’ve just scored a goal or your team’s just won.)

There were oceans of coaches and teachers around. A sea of brown and gold coaching jackets, and the brown suits of the teachers. They must’ve seen and heard us. It should’ve been at least six demerits each, and another game suspension for me, but they didn’t say a word.

Steffi’s getting- out- of- trouble fairy had covered me too. What a stelarly doos fairy. How could he not believe?

Rochele was waiting for me. “Helo, Stefan,” she said, straightening my tie.

“Hey,” he said. “See you later.”

“Later,” I repeated, watching him walk away. He was the doosest boy in the world. Much dooser than Sholto Pak Sung or any of the other crush-inducing seniors.

He turned back to wave. “See you in Fencing!”

“Fencing,” I repeated.

Rochele snapped her fingers in front of my eyes. I jumped.

“Do I have your attention? Have you forgotten it’s our physical today?”

“Oops.” I’d completely forgotten. Al students have to have a monthly physical examination on account of the school having to make sure we are in tip- top condition at al times. It is wholy tedious and you have to make up the missed class in your own time either at lunch or after school. Given that I had public service after school, that meant lunch was now gone. I sighed. Rochele grabbed my hand and puled me at great speed down the hal to testing without breaking into an actual run (one foot on the ground at al times). I tucked in my shirt as best as I could with my other hand.

We made it through the door just as the bel rang. Phew.

Before I could even sit down, one of the nurses handed us both a container and led us to the bathroom, neither smiling nor saying anything to us. Nurses are under strict instructions not to fraternize with students. She stood outside to wait until we were done.

Despite having completely forgotten I was due for a physical, I did, in fact, need to pee. Had I remembered, I’d have drunk liters to make sure of it. Nothing worse than sitting in testing, drinking and drinking and drinking, then waiting and waiting and waiting until you need to go, then going back and forth to the bathroom with the nurse through several false alarms. When you can’t pee, having a nurse standing outside waiting makes your bladder even more nervous.

Fortunately this time it wasn’t an issue for either of us. We handed the nurse our containers. I for one am always happy to relinquish a container ful of pee. I’m repulsed by how warm it is.

You’d think after so many years of giving urine samples I’d’ve learned not to be a baby about it. You’d be wrong.

We washed our hands thoroughly, waiting til the door swung shut behind the nurse, before talking.

“So you and Stefan … ,” Rochele began.

My cheeks got hot.

“Woo-hoo! I knew it! He does like you! And without a stupid fairy making him! I mean, why else would he come sit at our table when he and Fiorenze just got together?”

“They broke up.”

“I knew it!”

My cheeks felt even hotter. “He didn’t say anything about linking.” I hoped the heat on my face didn’t show. “I think he just wanted to see what it was like walking to school.”

“That’s right, Charlie, he just wanted to walk to school with you even though it takes so much longer than taking the bus.” Rochele finished drying her hands. “We should go back in. You don’t want to accrue any more demerits.”

We returned to the waiting room and sat in the two remaining empty chairs—unfortunately, not next to each other, not that we were alowed to talk. None of the other students bent over their tablets were in my year or streams so I didn’t know them, though some I knew by sight, and obviously everyone knew Cassie-Ann Zahour.

Cassie-Ann was in final year A-stream basketbal. It was rumored she’d already been offered five endorsements, not to mention contracts for several top teams. A book was being run on which ones she’d take. She was wholy destined to be an Our. I’d had many daydreams of feeding the bal to her under the post while she scored and scored and scored. Back when I’d thought I’d be in a basketbal stream.

Rochele’d had a crush on her for as long as I could remember and was mournful that the odds of being promoted from B-stream to A-stream basketbal while stil only a first year were vastly low, in the vicinity of zero, in fact. She would have to wait until she graduated and hope that some day they wound up on the same team.

I turned to the med form on my tablet, wishing, once again, there was a same- as- last- time button you could press, but no, you had to start from scratch, giving them your name, DOB, ID, class, electives, etc., etc. al over again before you even got to your diet, sleep patterns, and al the other health questions. Wholy maddening; vastly numbing.

I was last to transmit my form and so was last to be caled in for a physical. I had plenty of time to think about Steffi. Was he interested in me in more than a friend way? I had no idea. That hug had seemed way more than friendly. But maybe it was just the exhilaration of having conquered Malett.

He always seemed pleased to see me. But he hadn’t tried to hold my hand or kiss me like he had with Fiorenze Stupid- Name. Not that I’d let him kiss me—I was against being expeled. But maybe her al- boys- wil- worship- the- ground- you- tread- on fairy had made him rush things?

I wondered what it would be like having Steffi’s fairy. I wouldn’t use it for evil like, say, kidnapping Fiorenze and dumping her on an island far, far, far away. Al I wanted was to stop racking up endless demerits. Not to mention it being the perfect antidote to my mom’s knowing- whather-kids- are- up- to fairy. How wondrous would that be?

Did Steffi like me? Was it a friend thing waiting outside my house to walk to school with me? Or a boyfriend thing?

“Charlie Steele?”

I folowed the nurse into the windowless testing room, roled up my sleeve, and presented my arm for puncturing. A vial of blood and a skin swab later, I was ushered into Dr. Tahn’s office.

Frang, blast, and dung.

Tahn is my least favorite doctor. I cal her Dr. Ha Ha. She thinks she has a humor fairy so everything she says is hilarious. It’s best to laugh at her jokes no matter how unfunny. She acts like she’s your friend, and always, always wants to know how you’re feeling, how you’re
really
feeling. At my last physical I’d only been walking everywhere for a month, so I hadn’t yet racked up that many demerits, plus I’d gotten the businesslike Dr. Baranova.

I sighed and sat down.

“We’re quite the walking cloud of gloom, aren’t we, Charlie?”

I never know how I’m supposed to respond. Should I agree and get the heart- to- heart over and done with? Or should I disagree, in the forlorn hope that the heart- to-heart can be avoided?

I grunted noncomittaly.

“I see you’ve been accruing many demerits. You’re a regular demerit queen, aren’t you?”

I smiled to demonstrate that I was amused, even though I wasn’t.

“So what’s going on, Charlie? Trouble at home? Are your parents beating you? Ha ha!”

“No, Doctor, no beatings.”

“Wel, whatever it is, Charlie, if you keep accruing demerits at this rate you could end up in the principal’s office.”

I shuddered. The principal’s office was practicaly a synonym for

“expeled.” I didn’t want to find out exactly what
velvet glove, iron
fist
meant.

“We need to work together to keep you out of her office.”

“Yes, Doctor.” I failed to suppress a yawn.

Tahn’s eyebrows shot up. She looked down at her screen. “Says here you’ve been sleeping wel.”

“Yes, Doctor, when I get to bed I fal asleep right away.”

“And yet you’re yawning?” She poked at the screen. “You’re doing public service?”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“You were logged out of your session last night at five a.m.”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“Perhaps that is why you’re yawning?” she said. “You’re not getting to bed early enough for a sufficient night’s sleep.”

“Yes, Doctor.”

“Charlie, lots of students in their first year at Sports have difficulty adjusting. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. If there’s something going on at home you should let me know. We want to work with you to solve your problems.”

Her screen beeped.

“Your blood work is excelent. Your physical adjustment to Sports High is going very wel indeed. Now we only have to help with your mental adjustment. I’ve scheduled an appointment with one of the counselors at lunch today.”

I nodded, trying not to let my dismay show. Now I’d have to make up the class (Accounting) this physical had replaced during my dinner break. I’d been hoping to do as much homework as possible during lunch and dinner so I wouldn’t have a repeat of last night’s disaster and resulting five a.m. bedtime. Sigh.

“You’d better hurry along to your next class if you don’t want to get another demerit.”

“Thank you, Doctor.”

I jumped up and without actualy running got out of there as fast as I could. I had five minutes to make my next class. Piece of cake.

I glanced at my timetable. Fencing. And it was stil in Merckx.

Dung.

No way was I going to make it on time. Yet another demerit to be worked off. On the other hand, Steffi seemed to like me and I was positive that my fairy was getting lighter.

But at first recess Steffi and Fiorenze were side by side, dangling their feet in the pond and feeding the ducks (though both taking off your shoes and feeding the ducks are infractions). I had to blink to keep from crying. Crying is also an infraction.

For just a second I thought about transferring to another school.

Or kiling them both.

I didn’t know what I’d expected. Stupid-Name’s fairy had worked on him yesterday. Why not today? As long as Fiorenze and her fairy were around it didn’t matter whether Steffi liked me or not.

“I’m sorry, Charlie,” Rochele said, handing me a protein bar—

mangosteen again, erk!—and puling me away. “C’mon, let’s shoot some hoops. I can show you some new drils.”

Days walking: 66

Demerits: 4

Conversations with Steffi: 8

Doos clothing acquired: 0

Game suspensions: 1

Public service hours: 16

Hours spent enduring Fiorenze

Stupid-Name’s company: 2.75

B
y Saturday I had racked up eleven (eleven!) additional demerits, bringing my grand total to seventeen, or it would have except that ten more hours of public service got me down to seven and kept me from getting any more game suspensions. Missing my cricket match on Saturday had been malodorous in the extreme, but at least I’d been able to do another three hours of public service and thus end with only four demerits.

It was stil my worst week ever. On top of my inevitable lateness demerits, I managed to forget to recharge my tablet so that I had to

borrow a crappy one from tech support, as wel as forgetting my Statistics and Health homework. According to the counselor, Ms.

Wilkinson, whom I now had to see twice a week (frang, blast, and dung), it was one of the worst weeks for a first year student ever.

And had thus been
duly noted
.

On the bright side, I got through the rest of the week without encountering Danders Anders again. If only I could say the same about Steffi and Fiorenze. Them I saw every day, holding hands, giggling, staring into each other’s eyes. Yet Steffi walked to school with me in the mornings as if Fiorenze and her fairy didn’t exist.

When I asked about her he’d shrug or say they’d broken up. By recess they’d be back together again.

It hurt so much it was hard to think about anything else. Why hadn’t Steffi stayed in Ravenna where he belonged?

Despite us never issuing an invitation, they sat with me, Rochele, and Sandra at both recesses, lunch, and dinner. Or, rather, mostly not me because I was in the library doing homework, which was preferable to watching the two of them.

I no longer believed in their breakups. They would be together forever.

It was seven a.m. on Sunday, the one day of the week I get to sleep in, and there I was waiting for Rochele. She had continued not to take
no
for an answer. So even without ravening, rabid, rapid wolves chasing me, I was going to Fiorenze Stupid- Name’s house to learn how to get rid of my fairy.

I realy hoped Stupid- Name’s mom would find me a better one.

I wondered if I’d get to look at her mysterious book. The one Fiorenze had told me about. What was it caled? That’s right,
The
Ultimate Fairy Book
. It better be.

Nettles and Mom and Dad were stil asleep. Except for that one awkward walk home with Dad, I’d barely seen my parents al week. I missed them. I even missed Nettles. I couldn’t remember the last time we’d cooked together or she’d done my hair. Nettles is vastly gifted at hair. I even missed her yeling at me about my lack of creativity and originality.

There was a loud knock. I grabbed my backpack, slung it over my shoulder, and opened the door.

The early- morning sunlight made Rochele’s skin gleam and her dress golden. I closed the door behind me and saw that the dress was gray, not gold. It floated, making her look just how I imagined a fairy would.

“Wow!” I picked up the hem, discovering layers. The top few slid through my fingers. “So soft. Like it’s made of clouds or something.”

“Just silk.” Rochele twirled. The layers flared out and floated softly through the air. I’d never seen such a beautiful dress before.

“So I’m guessing the designer fair was a success.”

Rochele grinned. “It’s vintage, by Our Diviya, would you believe! From before she died, so not only did she
really
design this one, I found pictures of her wearing it!”

“No!”

“Yes! Guess how much it cost?”

“I can’t. Knowing your fairy—ten cents! Seems like the better the clothes she finds you, the cheaper they are.”

Rochele smiled hugely. “Five dolars. The woman was convinced it was a mistake. She checked through the inventory list, then the master list, and finaly rang Our Diviya’s headquarters. And five dolars it was! I
love
my fairy. This is the best dress ever! And you should see the black leather coat my fairy found for Sandra!”

I sighed. While they’d been finding the best clothes of al time, I’d been clearing another quadrant of weeds and glass.

“How about the boots?”

I looked down. “Is that suede?”

“Blue suede.”

“Blue suede shoes.”

“Boots,” Rochele said.

“Were they courtesy of your fairy?”

“Oh, no. They were a regular bargain. My fairy doesn’t do shoes.

You know that. Sandra got a green pair. But don’t worry,”

Rochele said, squeezing my hand. “My fairy found something for you as wel.”

“No!”

“Yes.” She opened up her backpack and puled out a plastic bag.

“Here,” she said, handing it to me.

I took it and puled out a dress. Emerald green and slinky. “No way!” I said, staring at it in wonder. The dress seemed to have been made out of fairy dust. “It’s gorgeous.”

“Also Our Diviya. See? It’s bias cut. That’s her trademark. Go hang it up. You have to treat it gently. It’s vintage.”

“Thank you, Ro. You’re the doosest!” I dashed upstairs, hung it up carefuly, and then dashed back down again.

Rochele grinned. “Can’t wait to see you wear it.”

I shut the front door behind us. “Off to the witch’s place.”

“Fio’s not
that
bad.”

“Yes she is.”

“I have vastly pleasing news for you on that front. Are you ready?”

“Sure. Tel al.” We walked to the end of the street and then headed downhil toward the river. It felt weird folowing the route to school on a Sunday. But Fiorenze’s house was in the poshest neighborhood, on the other side of the river, overlooking the ocean.

It would take us at least two hours to walk there. Lots of time for catching up on gossip.

“Fiorenze and Stefan have broken up.”

A tiny electric spurt of happiness went through me and then just as quickly disappeared. “Again. How many times is that now?

They’l be back together within nanoseconds.”

“I don’t think so.” Rochele screwed up her nose. “Fiorenze was at the fair too.”

“No. She was out in public? On her own?”

Rochele teeth- sucked. “Not on her own. She was with Tamsin.

Her mother. Gosh, that woman has a talent for scaring the boys away. Anyway, Fiorenze came up to us, said hi, how goes it, what have you bought, burble, burble.”

“She came up to you? Volunteered conversational openings? She burbled? Did she seem entirely healthful? No sign of fever?”

“I know! It was odd in the extreme. She asked some questions about you.”

“She did? About me? Maybe it was just because she knows you and me are friends. She
is
in your basketbal stream.” It amazed me that just saying the word “basketbal” sent a ping of sadness through me.

“Oh!” Rochele’s face brightened. “That’s my other piece of news. We’re not in the same stream anymore!”

“We’re not?” I repeated, not understanding.

“No. I’m A-stream now!”

I screamed and hugged her and she squeezed me back, lifting me a little way off the ground. “No! No! No!” I shouted.

“Yes! Yes! Yes!” she shouted back at me.

“How is that even possible?!”

“You know Elena shredded her ACL Friday—”

“Yup.” I touched my knee superstitiously. We were al afraid of blowing out our knees. “Oh, of course!” Why hadn’t I thought of it?

Elena out meant they’d need a backup for her backup. Elena is a center. Rochele is a center. I smacked my forehead. “I’m so slow!”

Or rather so caught up in my own troubles. Selfish, selfish, selfish.

I hugged her again. “Congratulations! Wow! They picked a lowly first year! You’re in A-stream
already
! Beyond-words doos!

You’l be in the starting lineup by the end of the year!” And basketbal stil won’t even be one of my electives. “Stop thinking bad thoughts, Charlie,” I told myself sternly. “Stop being selfish and sorry for yourself.”

“Don’t be sily,” Rochele said.”I’l just be happy if I get some minutes coming off the bench!”

“I always knew you’d be the first of us to make A-stream. I’m so happy for you!”

“Thanks. I’m wholy happy for me too! And, you know, I just bet they’l be holding new basketbal tryouts soon. Elena’s out for months. They’ve lost so many players, they’l have to get at least a couple of new ones.”

“That’s right!” I wouldn’t have to wait til next year to get into basketbal!

Rochele’s grin widened. “We’l be playing together again. Soon, I bet. Now, I believe I was revealing some doos Fiorenze gossip.”

I nodded. “She was asking you many questions.”

“So, I asked Fiorenze where Stefan was, and she said, and I quote, ‘I don’t know.’ ” Rochele looked at me expectantly.

“That’s it?” I said. That didn’t mean anything. “She doesn’t have to know where he is al the time.” I didn’t know that.

“But she said it with a shrug in her voice as if she didn’t
care
where he was and then she changed the subject. Trust me. They are wel and truly broken up.”

I tried to imagine what a shrug in a person’s voice would sound like and failed. “If you say so.” But I didn’t believe it. I’d had enough of Steffi’s on- again off- again linking with Fiorenze. I didn’t believe a word either one of them said.

“I say so.”

We turned the corner onto Malett, the steepest street in New Avalon. Below us the river glittered and there were already two blimps floating over the skyscrapers of the city.