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Authors: Teresa Southwick

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“Nothing. I'm fine.”

“The hell you are.” He set the macaroni and cheese on the island, then took her elbow and guided her to the kitchen table where he sat her in a chair. “You're going to tell me all about what's bothering you.”

“But you have a d-date.” Then the sobs started and she felt horrible because she was really happy for him. Dating was a good thing.

He pulled one of the other chairs closer and sat in front of her. “It can wait. But you need to talk to me, April. I can see how unhappy you are. Hell, you've been unhappy since that night at the diner. You said breaking up with Will would be the best thing, but I'm not seeing it.”

She drew in a shuddering breath and brushed tears from her cheeks. “Gosh, and here I thought I'd been hiding it pretty well.”

“You don't have to do that with me, honey.” There was sympathy in his eyes. Will's eyes. “And it's pointless to try. I can see through you. Always could.”

“Good to know.” She sniffled.

“This is about Will.” It wasn't a question.

“Since I can't hide anything from you... Yeah,” she admitted. “This is about Will. I really miss him.”

“Me, too.”

“This is so stupid.
I'm
so stupid.” She shook her head. “Here I am feeling sorry for myself when you've suddenly got an empty nest.”

She looked at him, really looked. He was still a handsome man who had the passage of time stamped on his face and silver in his hair. This is what his son would look like, but she wouldn't be there beside Will to share the good and bad things that left a mark on a life. The realization made her deeply and profoundly sad.

“Look, April, I love my family. You know that. But—” He stopped and listened for a few moments. “Do you hear that?”

“No. What?”

“It's called quiet. That's the absence of noise. And there's something else.”

April glanced around the kitchen and tried to figure out what he meant. But she had no idea what he was talking about. “I don't feel anything.”

“The energy level is as it should be.”

“I don't understand.”

“Because you're young.” He sighed. “It's like this. A man of my age likes his peace and quiet. Some would call it boring. I prefer to think of it as tranquility.”

“Okay,” she said hesitantly.

“Do I miss them?” He shrugged. “I would if they moved halfway around the world, but right now not so much. If I need a dose of chaos, I can pick up the phone and see if it's okay to drop by their house. Then I come back here to chill out.”

“Or go out. With Josie,” she teased.

“That, too.” He grinned. “Don't get me wrong. I wouldn't trade the experience of having my daughter here and getting to know my grandson so well. I would do anything for them. But I'm fine being by myself.”

“I'm glad.”

“But you're not. Fine, I mean.” He took her hand in his big warm ones. “Just so you know, I'm aware of the little scheme Kim came up with to get you and Will together.”

“How?”

“Not much happens in this town that I don't know about. I heard things and put two and two together. Then she confessed everything when she got back from the honeymoon and heard he left town.”

His words finally sank in. “Wait, she was pushing Will and me together? She claimed it was about closure for me. So I could move on.” And it all worked out so well, she thought.

“Yeah, that was her cover story. But she was matchmaking. You and Will are pretty stubborn—”

“Will might be.” After all they'd been to each other he still left. “But not me,” she protested.

“Right.” He smiled and apparently decided not to argue that point. “Anyway, she felt strongly that if you two gave it another chance, you'd see that you belong together. That's why she talked you into making him fall for you. It meant you'd have to spend time with him and rekindle what you had before. But she didn't expect that you would actually dump him.”

“If you suspected, why didn't you tip Will off to what was going on?” Although she remembered when she confessed the ruse, Will had said he suspected something was up. Like father, like son.

“I thought this whole conspiracy had a decent shot at succeeding,” Hank admitted. “And I wouldn't mind you and Will together. I'd have liked that very much.”

“Me, too.” Unexpectedly she smiled. “But your approval means a lot to me. Even if there's no Will and me to approve of.”

“Of course I approve. You're a very special woman. Not like that one he married. I never liked her.”

“Neither did Kim.” She would have to conclude that was a family thing.

“I know.” Hank looked down for a moment, then met her gaze. “My kids think I'm not observant, but they'd be wrong. I just pick and choose what I say and when I say it.”

“Probably smart.”

“I'm a cop and have been for a lot of years. Details are important and I don't miss them.”

“I've always suspected that about you,” she said.

He gave her a small smile. “I'm not blowing my own horn here, just stating facts. And I have a point.”

“Which is?”

“From the time you turned sixteen years old I've seen the way my son looks at you, April. He's loved you since then and I don't think he's ever stopped.”

“Then why did he go—?” Her voice cracked and she caught her bottom lip between her teeth.

“Some misguided sense of honor. The boy knows I want to retire and that the job is his if he wants it.”

“I wasn't aware. Will never told me the sheriff's job could be his.”

“I've always taught him and his sister to finish what they start. The lesson took real well with him. He's got this thing in his head that leaving Chicago is something to be ashamed of on top of his marriage not working out.”

“I see. Then it's really up to him, isn't it?” She nodded sadly. “Thanks for telling me this, Hank.”

“I thought you should know.” He stood up and folded his arms over his chest. “You're like a daughter to me and I want the best for you.”

“That really means a lot.”

“And this has to be said. Will is my son. I love him and mostly I'm proud of him.” He shook his head in exasperation. “But when it comes to romantic relationships he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer.”

“He loves his career and I love mine. We just aren't meant to be.” She smiled sadly. “I guess we are both stubborn. Neither of us would bend.”

“He just can't see what's in front of him, what's good for him,” Hank said. “And it's not easy for a father to watch and not say anything, to let him figure it out for himself. Sometimes you have to walk around with duct tape over your mouth. Metaphorically speaking.”

“Well, you're a wise man, Hank Fletcher. And I'm glad that you know I didn't really mean it when I said he's not the man for me. The thing is, he never asked me to go with him...” She lifted her shoulders in a shrug. “On the bright side, at least no one in town pities me this time.”

“I didn't pity you last time,” Hank said. “It's Will I feel sorry for. I think that job in Chicago is sucking the life out of him and there's nothing I can do. I was hoping you could talk him out of going back.”

“I didn't try. If I had, he would only resent me and that would ultimately destroy us. He had to want to be with me enough and—” she shrugged “—he didn't.”

“I know it. Don't like it,” he added, “but I know it's true.”

April stood and hugged him. “Thank you for listening to me whine.”

“Didn't sound like complaining to me, but anytime you need to talk, I'm here for you, honey.” He gave her a good squeeze, then stepped back. “You're not alone, you know that. I'm always here for you. You might not be family by blood, but you are by choice and heart. Sometimes that bond is even stronger.”

Tears gathered in her eyes again, but this time she smiled. “I'm so lucky to have you.”

“I'm the lucky one.”

“It's possible you'll get even luckier tonight,” she teased. “Say hi to Josie for me.”

“Will do.”

April left and walked across the dark alley, letting the tears roll down her cheeks unchecked. There was no one to see now. No one to put on a front for. The good news was that she hadn't lost the family who'd taken her under its wing so many years ago.

The bad news was that she was finding out that losing Will for the second time was twice as painful.

Chapter Fifteen

W
ill looked around the Chicago
squad room of the Twelfth Precinct. There were rows of desks with phones, files
and computers. The walls had multiple bulletin boards with wanted posters and
notices. Activity and excitement hummed in the air. He waited to feel excited
about being back, but there was nothing. Since he'd returned a couple weeks ago,
he figured the feeling probably wasn't going to happen. There were no windows
and even if he could look out one, he would see brick buildings and dingy
storefronts in this area of the city. No mountains and clear, blue sky.

Everyone had greeted him with assurances that he'd been missed
and there were case files stacked up on his desk to prove it. If all went well,
one of them would be closing in a little while.

He'd received an anonymous tip about a drug deal going down and
it had turned out to be reliable. He and Pete had made three arrests and the
perps were cooling their heels in holding. That would soften them up for
interrogation.

During the takedown a crowd had gathered. That always happened,
but this time there was something different. As he was cuffing a kid only a
little older than his nephew, there'd been a woman in his peripheral vision. His
heart had jolted as if he'd been smacked in the chest. For a split second he'd
thought she was April. And in that second his emotions ran the gamut from pure
exhilaration that she'd changed her mind and followed him to fear for her safety
in a fluid and dangerous situation.

His concentration slipped and the kid obviously felt it because
he'd twisted away and run. Will chased him and easily brought the kid down. In a
slimy puddle. His jeans and T-shirt were never going to be the same. Even worse,
the woman wasn't April.

“Welcome back to the Twelfth,” he muttered to himself.

Pete Karlik walked over and sat at his desk that faced Will's.
“They just brought the drug seller up from holding. He's in interrogation room
one.”

“Okay.”

Pete's sharp blue eyes narrowed. “Something bugging you?”

“Nope.”

His partner was thirty-five years old, smart and built like a
bull. He'd been married to his high school sweetheart for fourteen years and
they had two kids—a boy who was thirteen and a ten-year-old girl. As far as
anyone here at the precinct knew the guy had never cheated on his wife. Chicago
born and bred, Pete was a good cop who loved his city and would do anything to
keep it safe. Dedication like that was something special, something reserved for
a hometown boy.

After studying Will for several moments, he nodded. “So, how do
you want to handle this? We both know this kid is a low-level flunky. He's
expendable to them but could give us information, names, to bring down the
organization. Or at least put cracks in it. If we can get him to crack.”

“Good cop, bad cop?” Will suggested. He'd played both roles and
so had Pete.

The other man looked doubtful. “He's young, but I'd bet the
farm he doesn't scare easy. He's hanging out with some really bad guys.”

“Okay. You don't think we can rattle him.” Will thought for a
moment. “We can lay out his options. Reality check.”

“Maybe.” His partner mulled that over. “If we can imply that
the other two scumbags are rolling on him, it could give us leverage to make him
see the light.”

Will nodded. “Only one of them gets a deal and that would be
the first one who talks.”

“Okay. Let's work it that way.” Pete pushed his desk chair back
to stand up when his phone rang. “Karlik.” He listened and the frown on his face
said there wasn't going to be meaningful information forthcoming from the perp.
“Okay, Sarge. Thanks. You just saved us a trip up there.”

After his friend disconnected from the call Will said, “He
lawyered up.”

“Yeah.” Pete's expression grew darker. “You're good, Fletcher.
Keep it up and you might just make detective someday.”

“You're a funny guy.” But this situation wasn't the least bit
funny. “So much for taking down the big boys.”

“Sometimes I wonder why we bother.” Pete pounded a fist on his
desk. “Do you ever feel like you're one step behind the bad guys?”

Will folded his arms over his chest. “Try five steps.”

“And we'll never catch up.”

He'd never heard his friend so pessimistic. “Since when did you
turn into a glass-half-empty kind of guy?”

“Mine's not half-empty,” Pete said. “I don't even have a
glass.”

This wasn't like the “Crash” Karlik Will knew. He suspected
whatever was causing it was bigger than the job. “What's bugging
you
, pard?”

“It's Ryan.” The man rubbed a hand over his face. “He was at a
party that was raided by the cops. They found drugs. A lot. Regular pharmacies
should be so well stocked. Street stuff there, too. The guys who answered the
call knew me and gave me a heads-up. Abbie and I decided to let them bring him
into the precinct and scare the crap out of him.”

“Geez, man.” Will's closest experience to having kids was his
nephew. They'd had a very short discussion about girls and birth control. He
felt guilty for not being more a part of the boy's life. But if Tim had been
arrested at a party where illegal substances were found, he'd probably freak.
And there was one question he'd ask. “Did Ryan use?”

Pete met his gaze, worry stark in his own. “He swears he
didn't. His mother and I tend to believe him. Yeah, I know all parents say this,
but he's a good kid.”

“Of course he is. You and Abbie raised him.”

“I don't want to stick my head in the sand either. If he's got
a problem we need to know so we can help him.”

“Yeah.”

Will thought about the teens he'd busted in Blackwater Lake for
spray painting structures and egging cars. Neither of them had asked for a
lawyer and didn't know to do it because they'd never been in serious trouble.
Things didn't get complicated with arrests and paperwork. He'd been in front of
the situation and made a real, positive difference. It felt good.

“He's grounded now and we have to go to court. If the judge
wants to throw the book at him we're okay with that. Scare the hell out of him.
It's a juvenile record and can be erased. He can learn from this and with luck
it will be a cheap lesson.”

“Sounds like a good plan,” Will agreed.

Pete sighed. “But what if he doesn't learn? What if he goes to
another party when he's not grounded and there are drugs? He was at a friend's
house this time. Someone we know and thought was okay. These are the kids he's
hanging out with. What if—”

“Those two words will make you crazy, man.” Will held up a
hand. “Don't go there.”

“I wish it was that easy.”

“Look, you shouldn't listen to me.” Will blew out a long
breath. “I don't have kids.”

“Why is that?”

“What?”

“Why don't you have kids?” Pete asked.

“Because I married the wrong woman.”

“Yeah, you did, buddy. I never liked her. No offense.”

“None taken. My dad and sister said the same thing.” Will
laughed. “It seems to be the prevailing sentiment.”

“How's your dad doing?”

“Great.” Will missed him. He'd enjoyed having coffee in the
morning, discussing things that happened on the job with the man who knew the
challenges better than anyone. The man who'd offered the job to him.

“Must have been nice to spend some time with the family,” Pete
said.

“It was.” And April.

Just thinking about her made him smile. Then the emptiness
inside him opened wider because he couldn't walk across the alley and knock on
her sliding glass door. He couldn't watch her beautiful face light up with
pleasure at the exact moment she recognized him. There wasn't going to be an
“accidental” meeting outside their back doors that would result in a run
together.

He missed her so damn much.

“What's her name?” Pete asked.

“Who?”

“The one you left behind. The one who should have been your
baby mama?”

Will knew better than to blow off the question. This man had
taught him a lot about interviewing people and could see right through him. “Her
name is April. What gave me away?”

“Besides the fact that you say her name as if you're in
church?” Pete shrugged, the gesture saying it was easy to figure out. “And
you've been different since you got back. It's not job burnout. I know that when
I see it. But your heart's not in it anymore. You had the fire in the belly when
you first got here, but it went out a long time ago.” Pete thought about what
he'd just said. “It's like your heart is somewhere else entirely.”

“Someday you're going to have to tell me how you get into my
head like that.”

“No big secret, man. You let that kid slip away today. That's
not like you. I just knew you were thinking about her.” He grinned. “April. Like
spring.”

“Yeah.”

“And I'll tell you something else, Will. Remember it's worth
what you paid for it.” Pete leaned forward and rested his forearms on the desk.
“I vent about stuff, but I wouldn't change it. Chicago is in my blood. Abbie's,
too. We'll raise our family here and the kids will be fine. But your heart isn't
here anymore. You need to be where you left it.”

“But—”

“No
but
s.” Pete pointed a finger at
him, all Chicago attitude. “That's not a career failure. It's a choice. There's
a difference.”

Will's life flashed before his eyes, but it had nothing to do
with near-death experience. This city was big and there were parts that were
like nowhere else. Beautiful parts. But it was also crowded, noisy, dirty. And
most of all April wasn't here. Pete was right. He had a choice.

“You know,” his partner said, “while you were gone the captain
had me partnered with Jimmy Gutierrez. He's a good cop and has a lot to learn.
Reminds me of you.”

Will nodded. He got what his friend was saying and pulled out
his cell phone, then speed-dialed his sister. The call went straight to voice
mail, but he left a message.

“Kim, I need you to do something for me.”

* * *

April let Kim drag her from the parking lot just inside
Blackwater Lake town limits to the sidewalk on Main Street. Come hell or high
water they were going to the farmer's market and her friend wouldn't take no for
an answer. April wasn't very happy about it, but she wasn't happy about much
these days.

“I could have slept in today,” she complained as her friend
tugged her along.

“Not if you want to get the freshest fruits and
vegetables.”

“I don't. Old and stale is fine with me.” When Will left, he
had taken with him all the color in her life. These days her world was
black-and-white.

“Old and stale isn't healthy.” Kim pointed to the crowd
assembled a distance away at the end of the street where it was blocked off.
“Look at all those people. They're taking the fresh food right out of your
mouth.”

“I'm okay with that. Hey, slow down,” she protested when her
friend linked arms and increased the pace.

“The good stuff is going fast.”

“You should have come by yourself. I'm just slowing you
down.”

“I didn't want to come by myself. I wanted you here.” There was
an edge of aggravation to Kim's voice, but she seemed determined to project
cheerful, friendly enthusiasm.

“What's wrong with you?”

“I'm sure I don't know what you mean.”

April looked sideways, wondering who this woman was and what
she'd done with Kim. “When did you start talking like Scarlett O'Hara?”

“Well, fiddledeedee.” She grinned then drew in a deep breath.
“Isn't it a beautiful day for a—” She stopped and for just a moment there was a
horrified expression on her face.

“For what? Kim, what the heck is going on with you today?
Seriously, you're acting a little weird.”

“Nothing. It's just a beautiful day to go to the farmer's
market with my best friend. I've been busy with back-to-school stuff, and
settling Tim and me into family life. You and I haven't had a chance to really
talk since before I got married. Sensational pictures, by the way. Luke and I
are still trying to make up our minds which ones to order for the album.”

“Take your time.” April felt a little guilty about being such a
grump.

Black-and-white was a very narrow palette. She sighed and
tamped down the tiny bit of envy that wouldn't go away. Just because Kim had
gotten everything she'd ever wanted and April had lost the love of her life for
the second time, that was no reason to compromise a beautiful friendship. She
chalked it up to a very human flaw and resolved to work on it.

“How is married life?” she asked.

“Pretty great.” Kim positively glowed. “I like being a Mrs.
It's nice to have someone to count on. Oh, I know my family is there, but this
is different.”

“I'm really happy for you.” April filled the words with a lot
of phony eagerness and topped it off with a big, fake smile.

“No, you're not.” Kim scoffed. “And I don't blame you. It's
hard being this happy when my best friend in the whole world is miserable. I
can't believe my brother is so stupid.”

“Yeah. About that... Your dad told me your plan,” she put air
quotes around the word, “was nothing more than an attempt at matchmaking.”

BOOK: How to Land Her Lawman
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