How to Liv (13 page)

A few minutes later I was seated in front of the noisy old air conditioner on the couch.  It didn’t work that well so I was glad I hadn’t bothered drying my hair much or the rest of my body for that matter.  It was nice to feel a little damp in this heat.  I was patting a contented Ruby at my side, her head resting in my lap, when Joel came into the lounge room and stood in front of me.  He was only wearing a pair of black shorts, nothing else, and his hair was dripping water down his bare chest.  I guess he had the same idea as me.

“I’m glad Ruby likes you.”

“Mhmm.”  I was glad too, but I couldn’t find the words.  I licked my lips as I watched a drop of water slowly make its way down, down…

“
Liv, I see you left some clothing behind in the bathroom.”

“
Mhmm.”

“Am I right to assume you are wearing absolutely nothing under that pretty little dress?”

My eyes drifted up his chest to his mouth.  I watched as he licked his lips and bared his teeth and then I met his eyes.  “Yep.”  I watched the lust fill his eyes and he swallowed.  I felt the dampness between my legs increase.  My heartbeat became erratic looking at the intent shown in his gaze.  I blinked and looked down at the dog beside me.  “Excuse me Ruby,” I said, gently pushing the sleeping dog aside so I could stand.

Joel’s strong arms immediately lifted me off my feet and my legs automatically flew around his waist and squeezed tightly as our slightly wet bodies collided and clung.  I ran my hands through his dripping wet hair and kissed him hard, his minty fresh mouth opening for my tongue.  He began walking us back to his bedroom.

Once we made it to his room our frantic kisses slowed to something intense and passionate.  He stood me up beside the bed and slowly peeled my dress off.  I in return slowly removed his shorts and there was nothing in our way after that.  We took a moment for our eyes to savour each other’s bodies before lying down on the bed together.  He didn’t ask for control this time and I didn’t try to take control like last time.  There was no dirty talk and we both took our sweet time, exploring, teasing and getting to know each other’s bodies.

This was
different, it was slow, intense and tender.  It was
more
.  It was not sex or fucking, it felt like we were making love…  It was too soon for love, maybe we were ‘making like’… no it definitely felt like more.  I was falling for him… I could see myself falling in love with Joel…
fuck
.  It was all happening so fast and I was scared of getting hurt again.  At the same time it was pure heaven and so I did my best to squash my apprehension, push the fear aside and just enjoy myself.

That wasn’t too hard to do with Joel’s gorgeous body beside me.

We lay on Joel’s bed, our bodies naked, our legs entwined, as the sun beat in through the window. Joel was playing with my fingers that rested on his chest.  I was lying in the crook of his arm, happily sated.

I sighed contentedly. “This is nice.”

He spoke after a moment of silence, “That’s one word for it.”

I pulled my hand from his and lifted myself to hover above him.  I didn’t understand what he meant by his comment and I was about to ask but decided against it.  I’m not sure I wanted to hear the explanation.  I couldn’t look him in the
eyes, I was too scared of what I might see.  Instead I watched my hand as it ran along his bare chest and paused at the symbol high on his right pec.  It was some sort of tribal marking.

“What does this tattoo mean?”

“That one?  That means I was young and stupid and didn’t know what I was doing.”

“That’s it, that’s all there is to it?” I asked with a smile.

“Yep.  This one,” he pointed to the Southern Cross on his bicep, “This was what all the guys were doing.  A group of us got them all done at the same time, Adam has the same one-”

“I noticed that.”

“It was supposed to symbolise, unity with our country, unity with each other.”

“I like it.  What about this one?”  I touched the one on his other arm.

“Ah the red devil.  That was for a similar reason, stupid, we thought we were a gang or something.  It acts as a reminder to behave.”  He wriggled his eyebrows at me and then flipped me back on the bed so he was hovering over me.

“Oh really?”

“Yep.”  His hand ran down my side leaving goose bumps in its wake.  “So I told you mine, you tell me yours.”  His fingers rubbed gently against my hip.  “This is sexy.”

“You think?”

“Fuckin’ oath.”  He moved down to kiss the small blue butterfly tattoo on my hip, his lips and his proximity sending jolts of electricity through me.

“
My best friend Kylie and I both got them when we turned eighteen.  We got them in the same spot, but hers is pink.  We thought we were cool.”  I was unable to hide the sadness in my voice.

“You sound like you regret it?”

“No.  Not if you think it’s sexy.”  He laughed at that.

“
Will I meet Kylie?”

That question made me flinch.  I loved the fact that he was talking in terms of a future for us, a future where we would get to know each other’s friends, but he was never going to meet her.

“No.  Let’s just say we don't talk anymore and leave it at that.”

He eyed me for a moment before changing the subject, placing a kiss on my hip again and asking, “What were you and Raelene talking about in the backyard earlier?”

“Not much really.”

“Me?”  He looked up to me, his lips
hovering my skin.

“Well she was about to say something about you, I think, but then you came outside and rudely interrupted her.”  I rolled my eyes dramatically.  “What were you two whispering about in the kitchen?”

“Nope, I asked you first.”  He smirked, lifting his head, his fingers rubbing small circles on my tattoo.

“Well, she did ask what my intention was with you.”

“That little shit!”

“I think it’s sweet that she cares so much about you.”

“I guess.  So what
are
your intentions?”  His hand slid around my hip to the top curve of my arse.

“I think I just showed you my intentions.” 
I quirked my eyebrows at him.  His hand slid a little lower.

“Is that so?”  His hand moved lower still and cupped my cheek with a gentle squeeze.  Then his mouth moved to my navel and softly kissed me there.

“Mmm.”

My body automatically arched against his mouth.  His tongue traced a circle around my belly button and then he kissed my hip again.

“Your turn,” I said.

He lifted his head in question.

“To tell me what you were talking about,” I reminded him.

He shifted so that he was sitting, looking down on me.

“Right.  She gave me her approval.  She told me I better look after you.”

“Really?”
  I sat up, our chests almost touching.  Joel lifted his hand to push my hair back from my face.

“Yeah… she said you were a keeper.”  His eyes caught mine and held an unparalleled intensity to them. 
“I’m thinking, she may be right.”  He lowered his mouth to mine, not allowing me a chance to respond.

How could I respond to that anyway?  Other than to have a near heart attack at his words, that is
.
The best response was to kiss him back.

Each day that I didn’t see Joel made me miserable.  After he dropped me back home late Sunday I’d had an argument with Ally and everything had gone downhill from there.

Joel kissed me goodbye at the door at about seven o’clock.  I was dead tired.  Our weekend together had been amazing, but with the heat, little sleep and so much physical exertion, I had begun drifting off to sleep at his place, so I asked him to take me home.  We were reluctant to part, but I needed clean clothes and we both needed sleep before work the next morning.

After shutting my front door in a happy daze I was immediately accosted by my sister.

“Where have you been?  And why are you wearing the same clothes you were wearing yesterday?  Oh and we’re
still
out of milk!”

“I’ve been with Joel.”

“
All weekend
?”  She looked stunned, like she couldn’t believe I could get a guy like him, I was quietly still stunned myself.  Ally was in a foul mood and it was ruining my buzz.

“We had a wonderful time, thanks for asking!  And you’re old enough to buy your own goddamn milk!” I snapped before stomping off to my room, really mature like.

I had worked back late both Monday and Tuesday nights, so I had been able to avoid Ally since then.

Speaking of avoidance, Eric and Jess had been avoiding each other all week so far.  Eric hardly left the office at all so no-one in the factory had seen much of him, and Jess had quickly made an exit for the bathroom on the one occasion he was in the staff room at the same time as us.  They both seemed unhappy but neither of them seemed to be able to bring themselves to do anything about it.  It was getting to the point where I was ready to lock them in a room together so they could hash it out.  I’d broached the subject with Karen but she wanted nothing to do with it, so I was on my own.  I knew it wasn’t really my business but then they both kind of involved me and I was working opposite Jess which wasn’t fun.  I was still buzzing from my new relationship with
Joel, I just wanted everybody to have sunshine and happiness like me.  At least like I felt when I was with him or talking to him on the phone.

I hadn’t seen Joel since Sunday night and I missed him.  It was now six o’clock on Wednesday, and I was knocking off work and that meant I hadn’t seen Joel for seventy-one hours.  I hadn’t even spent seventy-one hours
with
him but somehow that length of time without him was, too much.  We’d spoken on the phone on Monday night for about an hour and Tuesday night for about half that, but it wasn’t the same as seeing each other.  I was contemplating going over to his house to surprise him when I collected my bag from my locker and checked my phone.  There was a message from Joel.  It was a couple of hours old.  I was instantly excited to read it:

My boss has me under the pump, will be working to all hours tonight so I might not even get a chance to call.  Sorry.  Looking forward to seeing you on the weekend x

My shoulders slumped. 
Oh.  The weekend?  Did I really have to wait that long?
  Joel’s boss had been taking advantage of daylight savings and getting his team to work at night when it was still light out but also cooler.  The days had been extremely hot and the jobs they were working on were all newly built houses so that meant no air-conditioning or anything.  It made sense to work back late during such a strong heatwave, but it didn’t help my Joel-less situation.

I slammed my locker shut and headed out to the car.  I unlocked it and reached into the glove box for the emergency pack of cigarettes.  I was standing there holding the pack, staring off to nowhere when Eric came into view.

“Eric!”  I called out to him as he headed to his car.

“Hey Olivia,” he said as he reached me.  His shoulders were hunched and he was still looking defeated.

“Oh for fuck’s sake, just talk to her!” I snapped.  He jumped, looking shocked at my words. 
Hell I was shocked at my words.
  “Shit!  Sorry.  I’m just having a moment.”

“Don’t do it.”  He pointed to the pack of smokes in my hand.  “Don’t light it
up, if you do I will have to bum one off ya.”

“I didn’t know you smoked.”

“Yeah, well, I thought you’d given up too.”  He shrugged.

“Yeah I have.”  I put the packet back in the car as Eric watched me in silence.

“I’ve tried… talking to her.”

“
Well try again.  Jess is really difficult to work with right now, she’s not happy and I’m sure it’s because of you.  Here,” I got Jess’s number up on my screen and then thrust my phone at him, “at least you know she’ll answer.”

He gingerly took the phone from me and stood staring at it in contemplation, his finger hovering over the call button.

“Okay.”  He let out a deep breath and hit the screen to place the call, looking nervously around the car park as the phone rang.  “No, it’s Eric.  Please don’t hang up,” he said in a rush.  I couldn’t hear what Jess was saying but by the look on Eric’s face it wasn’t good.  “No, I was just leaving work and Olivia lent me her phone… no mine’s not broken, I don’t have your number… you wouldn’t speak to me any other way…”  His voice softened a little, “Jess, please, this is ridiculous, I can’t get you off my mind… I don’t want anybody else.”  He realised I was still standing in front of him and he took a couple of steps away from me.  “I haven’t had a date in months, you’re all I think about…”  He walked further away and I couldn’t hear anything more that was said.  Moments later he was running back to me, the phone no longer against his ear.  “Do you mind if I send myself a text from your phone, I need Jess’s address from your contacts.”

“Oh I don’t know-”

“She said to get the address off you.  She said I could come over.”  His face broke into a huge smile, he was positively beaming.

“Well in that case, go ahead.”  He sent himself the text and handed the phone back to me.  “Good luck.”

“Thanks.”  Eric gave me a hug.  “Thank you for everything,” he said, squeezing me tighter.  Then he took off in the direction of his car.  I stood by mine and gave him a wave as he passed.  I was about to open my door when I heard Joel’s voice from behind me.

“What was that about?”  He sounded angry.  I spun around.  He
looked
angry too, but I was just excited to see him and I threw myself into his arms.  He didn’t hug me back.  I pulled away a little so I could look up at him.

“Joel?”  He wouldn’t look at me.

“Why were you hugging that guy?”

“I wasn’t, he hugged me.  That was Eric, you met him on Friday.”  The explanation didn’t seem like enough to ease his anger.  “It didn’t mean anything, he’s just a friend.  I helped him sort something
out, he was thanking me, that’s all.”

His arms finally circled me and he leaned in, whispering in my ear, “
Liv, I don’t play fuckin’ games.  If you and I are going to date, you can’t be cuddling up to some other guy.” 

Woah
!  Where did that come from? 
I was stunned.

“I wasn’t cuddling up to him-”

“When I walked into that pub on Friday night, I saw you from the back and I didn’t recognise you because of your hair cut.  I honestly glanced at what I thought was a couple canoodling. You and that guy were whispering to each other, looking all cosy.”  He moved back a little to see me.

“You have to believe me, there is absolutely nothing going on.”  The tense look on his face eased some.  His eyes wandered over my face, searching.

“I do.”  He sighed loudly and his hand squeezed my hip.  “I believe you.”  He half-smiled and I relaxed a little.  “But I also want you to know that I’m a one woman kind of guy and I can only be with you if you are too.”

Well that’s good to know.

“I’m sorry, but I will never be a one woman kind of guy.”  I laughed, wanting to relieve the tension.

“Very funny,” he remarked sarcastically, unable to hide his smile.  “Seriously though, I was insanely jealous when I saw you two cuddling just now.”

“It was
one hug
.”

“I can’t handle it…”  He got that nervous look on his face.  He swallowed.  “I don’t like not knowing where I stand.”

“Eric is a friend.  I’m not interested in anyone but you Joel.  I want to be with you.”

“Good.”

I wrapped my arms around his waist and looked up at his face expecting him to say more.  He didn’t. 
That’s it?  ‘Good’?  I tell you I want to be with you and you say ‘good.’  Gah!  Men!  What about letting me know where
I
stand?
 

“What are you doing here anyway?” I asked instead, deciding to change the subject when it became obvious he wasn’t going to say what I was hoping he would – that he wanted to be with me, and only me, too.

“I’m on a meal break.”

“Oh, you want to head to a
Macca’s or something?”

“I would, but it will have to be a drive thru for me, I
gotta head back already.  I only get half an hour and the job is ten minutes away.”

“You mean
, you wasted your break coming to see me?”

“Well I wouldn’t say
wasted
it.”  He leaned down to kiss me.  It was soft and gentle, and when he pulled away it wasn’t nearly enough.  “I gotta go.”

“Okay.”

I let him go.  He took a step back before taking another one forward again, crashing into me.  His lips crushed mine and I smiled against his mouth briefly before kissing him back.  His tongue entered my mouth and his hands firmly held my head to him. 
Yes, this is what I wanted.
  I kissed him back just as fiercely, threading my fingers through his hair.  We kissed until we were both gasping for air.  Our foreheads rested against each other.

“Okay, I’m going now.”  He leaned down for one last, quick peck and then walked away.  I watched as he got in his
ute and gave me a wave, before turning away and getting in my own car.  We pulled out of our car parks and drove away at the same time, but unfortunately in different directions.

When I got home Ally was cooking dinner, I could smell it as soon as I entered the front door.

“Mmm, that smells good!  What ya cooking?”

Ally looked up from the stove when I entered the kitchen.

“Nothing spesh, just a chicken stir fry.”  She turned back to what she was doing.  “So you talking to me now?”

“I guess.”  I shrugged.  I grabbed a piece of julienned capsicum from the chopping board and started munching.  We hadn’t spoken in days, since our argument, but then we hadn’t seen each other either.

“No Joel?” she asked, looking towards the lounge.

“No.”

“He had enough of you already?” 
Argh!  She annoyed me!
  “God, he’s so damn good looking Libby.  You still seeing him?”

“Yeah, he’s just busy with work.”

“What’s he do anyway?”

“He’s a tiler.”

“So he’s hot, drives a ute,
and
he’s a tradie!  You scored the trifecta!”  She giggled.  I sighed and felt my blood begin to boil.  “Is he good in bed?”  I just glared at her, she could be so crude sometimes.  “Don’t tell me you spent all weekend with him and didn’t give it up?”

“I didn’t say anything of the sort,” I snorted angrily.

“So?”  She turned away from the stove, placed a hand on her hip and glared at me expectantly.

“So, I’m not telling you anything!”

“God, I’m just trying to make conversation, you don’t have to snap my head off!”  She turned away again.

“Just don’t go getting any ideas!  I really like Joel and I don’t-”

“Libby, I’m not gonna steal him from you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”  She rolled her eyes at me and I left the room before I said anything that I might regret.

“I’m
gonna have a shower!” I called out as I walked down the hall.

Fifteen minutes later, we were seated in the lounge room, each cupping a bowl of stir fry, watching TV.  Ally didn’t bring Joel up again and I was grateful.  The last thing I needed was her getting involved in my new relationship - been there, done that.  We steered the conversation onto more routine things.  It was the most civil we had been all week, even though in the back of my mind I was thinking of ways to subtly remind Ally that she was meant to move out.  I knew what she was capable of and it was enough to make me want her and Joel to steer clear of each other as much as possible.  Her living under my roof and being very single was a dangerous combination to be around with Joel, especially when our relationship was so fresh.