I Sacrifice Myself (9 page)
Read I Sacrifice Myself Online
Authors: Christina Worrell
Tags: #romance, #vampire, #erotica, #love, #horror, #life, #death, #paranormal, #supernatural, #werewolf, #sacrifice, #sexual, #free, #cheap, #spine tingler
Some of the other hunters in the room
disagreed, though, with our leader’s decision and hesitated.
I boldly turned towards Dimitri, who had not
moved towards me at all, the whole time we’d discussed him. I was
surprised at that, but I knew deep down, that my Dimi was in there.
I just had to wake him up. I had to bring him to life.
I took a deep breath and walked to my
boyfriend. He eyed me, but never moved an inch. Any other vamp
would have drained me by now. When I was within arm’s reach, he
took stock of all the weapons pointed in his direction. Then, like
a snake, he bit into my neck. It was strange being on this end of
things. I was always the one doing the fang sinking.
The initial bite stung like a wasp or a
small knife wound. All the hunters had tensed, but thankfully they
didn’t shoot. Something else I was grateful for, the items were
mounting. I would owe the whole compound when all was said and
done.
Dimitri finally wrapped his arms around me
and pulled me close. I could feel his warmth. He was not cold, but
he also was not the same temp as me.
Was he really dead? We’d always thought of
vamps as bloodthirsty, deceased, and diseased creatures of the
night. Could they be, well tamed? Could I bring him back enough so
he could still be our hunter, just a bit more feral. Solo missions
possibly? Could a vampire possibly switch sides and fight for good?
So many questions and not enough answers.
I felt a strange haze settle over my mind.
My blood was not toxic to him apparently. My heart beat in frenzy
now, with hope, with yearning, and disturbingly enough with
desire.
He let go and pulled back, only enough to
turn his head towards my ear, his breath still excited me.
didn’t have a choice though, if this didn’t work, he’d die.
He released me and backed away. Apparently
he wouldn’t kill me. I was a humble meal ticket, that all but threw
myself down at his feet. I was also the only reason he was still in
existence.
Dimitri still smelled like my Dimi, he was
not covered in flesh and blood. He was still human to me, too much
so. My arms ached to hold him.
When he reached the far side of the small
cell, I backed away as well, keeping my eyes on him.
I heard the door unlock and open as I
reached it.
Ian posted three guards on Dimitri and
ordered me to eat and sleep. I followed those directions. Even with
a heavy heart I managed to eat a banana and take a three hour
nap.
When I woke, in Dimitri’s bed, I was
confused. It didn’t take long for the recent events to hit me.
Reality hit me, sharp and clear. My chest felt like something was
dying inside of it and it would burst open at any moment.
Dimitri was a vampire. I had a choice, a
difficult one, before me. Turn him back, let him die, or let him
change me and we escape this place. I knew we could. All I had to
do was convince Ian to allow me to be alone with Dimitri, again.
I’d unlock the gate and we’d flee. He’d change me and we’d
run.
My choices were clear, my mind and heart not
so much.
With a deep sigh, I tugged my pants on, and
pulled a brush through my hair. I struggled to comprehend both
sides of this.
Emotionally I was drained, mentally I was
lost, and momentarily I was virtually fucked. I stood between a
rock and a hard place, or rather death and losing someone to the
ultimate and eternal sleep.
The wound he had inflicted on my neck
earlier, was nearly healed, and would not scar. I ran my fingers
lightly over the spot, right under my ear lobe. I could still feel
his mouth there. He kissed the same, if you could call that a kiss,
a kiss of death or ‘baiser la mort’.
Later that afternoon, I was temporarily
allowed back in to see Dimitri. Ian had barely been given the go
ahead to keep my lover alive. I knew I didn’t have long before they
staked Dimi. I had to make my decision quickly.
When I reached his cell my heart hammered,
my pulse jumped, and I nearly went to my knees. My hand reached for
the bars as the heavy door behind me slammed shut. I was alone with
him. What would I choose? Was love more important?
Would he leave here with me and not attack
or hurt anyone on the base? Even if he swore, I couldn’t be sure.
Their lives were precious.
Slowly and carefully, I unlocked his cage.
My strong and deadly man, eyed me wearily, and the door to the
room. He knew I was alone with him, and he could easily be on me
before I closed his cell door, and he could escape with or without
me. That is, if he got passed the main door.
Dimitri didn’t move a hair. He simply
watched me come to him as I closed the cell door firmly behind
me.
I had the key of course, which was crazy. He
could kill me and open the cell without any effort. It was unlikely
he’d get out the main door. They wouldn’t open it even if he held
me hostage, or so I thought. I’d taken my life into my own hands
and they could not spare me for the rest in the base.
Dimitri also knew this. At least I was
hoping he did.
down my spine, and heat through my body. It touched secret places,
places only he’d touch.
stood unblinking in the corner, unmoving, waiting for me to
speak.
I could not let him die.
I turned and put my back to him.
He swiftly encased me in his steel
arms.
He thought I meant to have him turn me, for
us to run from here.
preferred to do.
closed my eyes again and sagged against him.
neither could he. My temptation, which stood so blatantly before
him, would not be denied.
Within seconds he had taken his fill.
My heart slowed. My legs collapsed, and I
struggled to remain upright and on my feet. After what felt like
eternity, but was only a second, his vise-like grip was all that
held me up. The others would think he was draining me I was
sure.
holes in my neck.
I was woozy and needed him to keep me from
falling flat on my face.
Despite the fact I was probably about three
to three and half quarts short of blood, I managed to remain not
only awake, but aware.
When I’d healed enough, he set me on his
bed. I thought he’d go back to his dark corner but he joined me
instead. He curled up behind me. Thoughts of his body floated
freely through my mind, all intently headed straight for the
gutter. I was doomed, and he knew it. It was only a matter of time
before the whole base did.
haunting, and brought back memories of us in this very same
position. His warm breath tickled my ear, as it had so many times
before. His hand found its regular spot, like he was still my Dimi,
not a blood sucking and demonic creature that sought to drain us
all as soon as he was free.
of us.
After an hour had passed, I sat up slowly,
careful not to anger the beast that lay ever so still behind me. He
never restrained me or blocked me. He was strong enough, even as a
newborn, to crush me instantly.
He allowed me to leave. I yearned to turn
and run back to him, to wrap myself around him, and to give into
what we both wanted. Part of me knew, deep down, that his fantasy
was the only one that ended up with us together.
As I reached the main door, I heard them
click their safeties on their guns off. The door unlocked and they
let me out, peering in at Dimitri.
I needed to finish something before my
decision was made.
With my head bowed, my steps heavy, and
breathing ragged I made my way to the star-lit court yard. I was
alone, and always would be, might as well get used to it. Dawn was
three hours away and I knew he was right. They’d stake him, as the
sun peeked from the horizon, as life wakened and continued without
us. I was out of time.
Tears pooled in my eyes and made a slow path
down my face. A guard silently patrolled within ear shot of me, but
never came close.
I must have sat there on the cold, stone
bench for some time, with my face wet and the soft breeze tickling
it.
Ash came to me and settled beside me. He
offered me no comfort or demands for answers. He simply sat beside
me and waited for me to speak.
After some time I finally found the words I
needed him to hear.
painful it was for him to sit here with me, to show support when
everything screamed at him to put the monstrous demon nearby I
loved so dearly down.
I knew he was right, this was only hurting
him more, the longer I delayed. Yet, he needed to hear it. I was
cruel and not fit to be his friend.
he’d been holding. Now shame flashed through his eyes, and
defeat.
New tears fell but not for my Dimi. For the
pain I could sense within my ex. I was the monster, free to wound
all those around me, to tear them down.
up and stalking down the hall. At wrongly assumed he was just done
with this conversation. Later I would find out differently.
I jumped up and ran to get my sword and
knives. I needed to release this mounting frustration before I
killed myself. No one questioned my actions while a vampire was on
base, and still alive, well undead.
I jumped into my car, not the Hummer, and
shot out of there faster than the guard could relay the office to
inform Ian.
I turned my stereo on, hit play not caring
which CD I had put in it last, and watched the scenery fly by
faster than the speedometer needle. I reached ninety before I was
officially off base.
Unconsciously I must have known all along I
would head here. As I exited the car I heard the screams.
Death was always near by. I could sense it
better than a mortician.
I jerked my blades free, donning only the
sword and sheath, leaving my jacket behind. The sword swung
precariously off my shoulder, ready to remove more heads.
I headed towards what sounded like a newborn
nest. The elder I had decapitated wasn’t here randomly, it had
sired another. Two at least by my count, if you included the
newborn that had attacked Ian.
I stealthily made my way inside the two
story building and upstairs. My eyes could barely comprehend the
mayhem surrounding me. Rotting corpses, drained of blood, assaulted
me and my nose. Innards were now spilled like sausages at my feet,
ready to tangle me up and take me out.
I could hear the rumors now, taken out by an
intestine in battle. I fell on my own sword.
I shook my head and worked my way carefully
around the bloody mess, trying to block the macabre visual effects.
Flies buzzed in swarms on the more decayed… bodies? Parts? I had an
iron stomach but not if flies and maggots were involved.
Sweat dripped off my brow into my eye, I
refused to swipe it away and be distracted. More sweat made tiny
salty rivulets down my spine, soaking the waistband of my leather
pants.
I felt my power tingle slightly as it warned
me of the vampire crouching just beyond the corner I’d just come
to. It was waiting for me to make a mistake, to lower my guard or
even walk blindly into his trap.
Not this hybrid. I may have had a death wish
but not before I rolled a few heads. I let the sheath that held my
sword drop to the floor as I pulled it free and prepared to
swing.
disagreed, though, with our leader’s decision and hesitated.
I boldly turned towards Dimitri, who had not
moved towards me at all, the whole time we’d discussed him. I was
surprised at that, but I knew deep down, that my Dimi was in there.
I just had to wake him up. I had to bring him to life.
I took a deep breath and walked to my
boyfriend. He eyed me, but never moved an inch. Any other vamp
would have drained me by now. When I was within arm’s reach, he
took stock of all the weapons pointed in his direction. Then, like
a snake, he bit into my neck. It was strange being on this end of
things. I was always the one doing the fang sinking.
The initial bite stung like a wasp or a
small knife wound. All the hunters had tensed, but thankfully they
didn’t shoot. Something else I was grateful for, the items were
mounting. I would owe the whole compound when all was said and
done.
Dimitri finally wrapped his arms around me
and pulled me close. I could feel his warmth. He was not cold, but
he also was not the same temp as me.
Was he really dead? We’d always thought of
vamps as bloodthirsty, deceased, and diseased creatures of the
night. Could they be, well tamed? Could I bring him back enough so
he could still be our hunter, just a bit more feral. Solo missions
possibly? Could a vampire possibly switch sides and fight for good?
So many questions and not enough answers.
I felt a strange haze settle over my mind.
My blood was not toxic to him apparently. My heart beat in frenzy
now, with hope, with yearning, and disturbingly enough with
desire.
He let go and pulled back, only enough to
turn his head towards my ear, his breath still excited me.
“
You cannot change me, but
you can join me…” his whispered offer tickled more than my ear, it
tickled my heart and soul.
didn’t have a choice though, if this didn’t work, he’d die.
He released me and backed away. Apparently
he wouldn’t kill me. I was a humble meal ticket, that all but threw
myself down at his feet. I was also the only reason he was still in
existence.
Dimitri still smelled like my Dimi, he was
not covered in flesh and blood. He was still human to me, too much
so. My arms ached to hold him.
When he reached the far side of the small
cell, I backed away as well, keeping my eyes on him.
I heard the door unlock and open as I
reached it.
Ian posted three guards on Dimitri and
ordered me to eat and sleep. I followed those directions. Even with
a heavy heart I managed to eat a banana and take a three hour
nap.
When I woke, in Dimitri’s bed, I was
confused. It didn’t take long for the recent events to hit me.
Reality hit me, sharp and clear. My chest felt like something was
dying inside of it and it would burst open at any moment.
Dimitri was a vampire. I had a choice, a
difficult one, before me. Turn him back, let him die, or let him
change me and we escape this place. I knew we could. All I had to
do was convince Ian to allow me to be alone with Dimitri, again.
I’d unlock the gate and we’d flee. He’d change me and we’d
run.
My choices were clear, my mind and heart not
so much.
With a deep sigh, I tugged my pants on, and
pulled a brush through my hair. I struggled to comprehend both
sides of this.
Emotionally I was drained, mentally I was
lost, and momentarily I was virtually fucked. I stood between a
rock and a hard place, or rather death and losing someone to the
ultimate and eternal sleep.
The wound he had inflicted on my neck
earlier, was nearly healed, and would not scar. I ran my fingers
lightly over the spot, right under my ear lobe. I could still feel
his mouth there. He kissed the same, if you could call that a kiss,
a kiss of death or ‘baiser la mort’.
Later that afternoon, I was temporarily
allowed back in to see Dimitri. Ian had barely been given the go
ahead to keep my lover alive. I knew I didn’t have long before they
staked Dimi. I had to make my decision quickly.
When I reached his cell my heart hammered,
my pulse jumped, and I nearly went to my knees. My hand reached for
the bars as the heavy door behind me slammed shut. I was alone with
him. What would I choose? Was love more important?
Would he leave here with me and not attack
or hurt anyone on the base? Even if he swore, I couldn’t be sure.
Their lives were precious.
Slowly and carefully, I unlocked his cage.
My strong and deadly man, eyed me wearily, and the door to the
room. He knew I was alone with him, and he could easily be on me
before I closed his cell door, and he could escape with or without
me. That is, if he got passed the main door.
Dimitri didn’t move a hair. He simply
watched me come to him as I closed the cell door firmly behind
me.
I had the key of course, which was crazy. He
could kill me and open the cell without any effort. It was unlikely
he’d get out the main door. They wouldn’t open it even if he held
me hostage, or so I thought. I’d taken my life into my own hands
and they could not spare me for the rest in the base.
Dimitri also knew this. At least I was
hoping he did.
“
Have you made your
decision, my kitten?”
down my spine, and heat through my body. It touched secret places,
places only he’d touch.
“
I have.”
stood unblinking in the corner, unmoving, waiting for me to
speak.
I could not let him die.
I turned and put my back to him.
He swiftly encased me in his steel
arms.
He thought I meant to have him turn me, for
us to run from here.
“
No, feed. Give me time to
save you.”
preferred to do.
“
I have no time. They will
stake me with the dawn. It’s now or I die.”
closed my eyes again and sagged against him.
“
Feed,” I demanded. I knew
their thirst was ten times what mine was and my blood, if it did
not poison them, would be like fine wine before a
fireplace.
neither could he. My temptation, which stood so blatantly before
him, would not be denied.
Within seconds he had taken his fill.
My heart slowed. My legs collapsed, and I
struggled to remain upright and on my feet. After what felt like
eternity, but was only a second, his vise-like grip was all that
held me up. The others would think he was draining me I was
sure.
“
Stop… stop Dimi…” My
attempt was weak. With perfect hearing, he heard my whisper. The
name I used often, in the past, with such affection had gained his
attention. I was sure nothing else would have done so.
holes in my neck.
I was woozy and needed him to keep me from
falling flat on my face.
Despite the fact I was probably about three
to three and half quarts short of blood, I managed to remain not
only awake, but aware.
When I’d healed enough, he set me on his
bed. I thought he’d go back to his dark corner but he joined me
instead. He curled up behind me. Thoughts of his body floated
freely through my mind, all intently headed straight for the
gutter. I was doomed, and he knew it. It was only a matter of time
before the whole base did.
“
I still want you
Shade.”
haunting, and brought back memories of us in this very same
position. His warm breath tickled my ear, as it had so many times
before. His hand found its regular spot, like he was still my Dimi,
not a blood sucking and demonic creature that sought to drain us
all as soon as he was free.
“
I still love you too,
Dimi.”
of us.
After an hour had passed, I sat up slowly,
careful not to anger the beast that lay ever so still behind me. He
never restrained me or blocked me. He was strong enough, even as a
newborn, to crush me instantly.
He allowed me to leave. I yearned to turn
and run back to him, to wrap myself around him, and to give into
what we both wanted. Part of me knew, deep down, that his fantasy
was the only one that ended up with us together.
As I reached the main door, I heard them
click their safeties on their guns off. The door unlocked and they
let me out, peering in at Dimitri.
I needed to finish something before my
decision was made.
With my head bowed, my steps heavy, and
breathing ragged I made my way to the star-lit court yard. I was
alone, and always would be, might as well get used to it. Dawn was
three hours away and I knew he was right. They’d stake him, as the
sun peeked from the horizon, as life wakened and continued without
us. I was out of time.
Tears pooled in my eyes and made a slow path
down my face. A guard silently patrolled within ear shot of me, but
never came close.
I must have sat there on the cold, stone
bench for some time, with my face wet and the soft breeze tickling
it.
Ash came to me and settled beside me. He
offered me no comfort or demands for answers. He simply sat beside
me and waited for me to speak.
After some time I finally found the words I
needed him to hear.
“
I loved you Ash, I really
did. I was content…”
“
But not happy,” he
finished.
“
There was always something
about him. Maybe his strength, his honor, and his hidden pain that
drew me.”
“
I don’t want to hear how
damned perfect and in love you were.”
“
Are,” I
whispered.
“
Whatever,” he replied
sadly.
painful it was for him to sit here with me, to show support when
everything screamed at him to put the monstrous demon nearby I
loved so dearly down.
I knew he was right, this was only hurting
him more, the longer I delayed. Yet, he needed to hear it. I was
cruel and not fit to be his friend.
“
We are the same, Dimitri
and I. You and I are not, and we were frowned on. You know this. I
need a mate who can match me, Ash, in everything.”
“
You were the same, you are
no demon now. He can never be your mate Angelissa,” Ash replied so
quietly, it was as if he never said it, but he did and I heard
him.
he’d been holding. Now shame flashed through his eyes, and
defeat.
New tears fell but not for my Dimi. For the
pain I could sense within my ex. I was the monster, free to wound
all those around me, to tear them down.
“
What you never saw was
that I was strong enough for you, Shade. I just wasn’t like him.
He’s the reason we’re not together. The reason I can’t hold you and
kiss you. He’ll take you with him if I don’t end him
now.”
up and stalking down the hall. At wrongly assumed he was just done
with this conversation. Later I would find out differently.
I jumped up and ran to get my sword and
knives. I needed to release this mounting frustration before I
killed myself. No one questioned my actions while a vampire was on
base, and still alive, well undead.
I jumped into my car, not the Hummer, and
shot out of there faster than the guard could relay the office to
inform Ian.
I turned my stereo on, hit play not caring
which CD I had put in it last, and watched the scenery fly by
faster than the speedometer needle. I reached ninety before I was
officially off base.
Unconsciously I must have known all along I
would head here. As I exited the car I heard the screams.
Death was always near by. I could sense it
better than a mortician.
I jerked my blades free, donning only the
sword and sheath, leaving my jacket behind. The sword swung
precariously off my shoulder, ready to remove more heads.
I headed towards what sounded like a newborn
nest. The elder I had decapitated wasn’t here randomly, it had
sired another. Two at least by my count, if you included the
newborn that had attacked Ian.
I stealthily made my way inside the two
story building and upstairs. My eyes could barely comprehend the
mayhem surrounding me. Rotting corpses, drained of blood, assaulted
me and my nose. Innards were now spilled like sausages at my feet,
ready to tangle me up and take me out.
I could hear the rumors now, taken out by an
intestine in battle. I fell on my own sword.
I shook my head and worked my way carefully
around the bloody mess, trying to block the macabre visual effects.
Flies buzzed in swarms on the more decayed… bodies? Parts? I had an
iron stomach but not if flies and maggots were involved.
Sweat dripped off my brow into my eye, I
refused to swipe it away and be distracted. More sweat made tiny
salty rivulets down my spine, soaking the waistband of my leather
pants.
I felt my power tingle slightly as it warned
me of the vampire crouching just beyond the corner I’d just come
to. It was waiting for me to make a mistake, to lower my guard or
even walk blindly into his trap.
Not this hybrid. I may have had a death wish
but not before I rolled a few heads. I let the sheath that held my
sword drop to the floor as I pulled it free and prepared to
swing.
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