I Shouldn't Be Telling You This: Success Secrets Every Gutsy Girl Should Know (6 page)

Your handshake.
This is one of the first ways the interviewer connects with you, and you need to do it right. Driver says to make certain the web of your hand is positioned in the web of the interviewer’s and that you point your thumb to the sky. Also, tilt back your hand a little—that’s what Driver calls “the pauper’s handshake.” It acknowledges the other person’s power, she says. You’re saying, “I know who’s in charge here.”

Your sitting position.
Once you’re sitting down, Driver recommends you move the chair about thirty degrees, so it’s slightly off center. Being directly face-to-face often makes the other person anxious.

Your head and your eyes.
Keep your head level when listening. Janine points out that lots of body language is literal and holding your head level translates as—yes, you got it—levelheadedness. Most people, she says, are comfortable with eye contact about 60 percent of the time, so don’t overdo it. She recommends that you occasionally glance away while speaking, giving the other person a break, and look to your bottom left—it signals that you’re having an internal dialogue or, in other words, considering what the interviewer is saying.

Your legs and feet.
I can’t help it—I often check out a job candidate’s feet and legs, and from what Janine says, so do many prospective employers. Do not cross your legs, she advises. Keeping both feet on the ground signals that you, well,
have both feet on the ground.

Pacifiers.
These are body gestures we use to calm ourselves. Hands can be terrible offenders—they sometimes flail and fuss when we’re nervous. Driver says that women rely on two pacifiers in particular. One is touching the dimple just below our necks, especially when we’re asked an awkward question such as “Why is there a six-month gap in your résumé?” Driver suggests instead grabbing your chin between your thumb and forefinger (it looks thoughtful). The other bad pacifier is playing with your cuticles. Getting a manicure the day before the interview can help you resist the tendency to do that. Driver says that if you feel the urge to move out of nervousness, do some toe crunches since the interviewer won’t notice those.

I have to add one more nervous habit: playing with your hair. I’ve had young women right out of college practically give themselves new hairstyles during interviews. If you know you do this, consider wearing your hair up or back.

Your manners.
BE ON TIME. That’s critical. Almost 60 percent of the managers in the
Cosmo
survey viewed lateness as a major problem/deal breaker. I once sent home an editorial assistant candidate without even conducting the interview because she was ten minutes late. Who wants an assistant who can’t be on time?

Do not arrive with any kind of beverage. I feel I should say this because at
Cosmo
we once had a guy who was applying for an assistant position show up with a jumbo-size iced coffee and sip it through the interview. Before taking a chair, wait for the interviewer to sit down first or gesture for you to do so. And turn off your damn cell phone. It’s so lame when someone’s phone rings and they have to fumble for it in their bag.

And while we’re on the subject of manners, I want to point out here that you absolutely must follow up with a thank-you note. Snail mail or e-mail? One top career expert I know says that the era of the handwritten thank-you note is dead. “By the time it arrives,” she says, “they’re already onto the next candidate.”

But some people are funny; they like and expect the old-fashioned kind of note. In fact, when we asked in the
Cosmo
survey what managers preferred, 50 percent said e-mail and the other half said they’d want a handwritten note. If you’ve interviewed with someone on the older side or it’s a conservative company, you might want to cover yourself both ways. Shoot off an e-mail saying “A handwritten note will follow, but I just wanted to say how much I enjoyed talking to you. The job sounds terrific.”

Show Them the Love

For years I tried to analyze why I loved talking to certain job candidates whereas others, even those with great skills, left me cold. What I finally decided is that some people seem more fully engaged in the process, more excited and delighted to be there. There’s even a little bounce to their step when they walk into the room, and you may sense that bounce even when they’re sitting in the chair talking to you. They want the job, and they’re not afraid to show their passion. It’s another way of going big or going home. And you know all that stuff I just told you about things like the right shoes and a perfect handshake? They might not even matter all that much if you get
this
right.

Recently I bumped into Frank Farrell, the executive recruiter who had first called me to interview for the job as editor in chief of
Redbook
, and it gave me a chance to finally ask him a question. After I’d been offered the
Redbook
job, Frank had phoned and congratulated me, and before he signed off, he had told me never to change the way I came across during an interview. I was so caught up in the moment, I hadn’t asked him to elaborate, but later I’d wondered what he’d meant exactly. This was finally my opportunity to inquire. He told me I’d just seemed very passionate about my work and the job we were discussing. “You turned beet red when you were talking about it,” he said. I nearly died when he shared that info, and I’d hardly recommend you go into an interview looking as if you’ve strayed too close to a blowtorch. But you get the point: I’d shown the love that day, and it had worked.

Unfortunately, some job candidates tamp down their passion. Maybe they’re afraid that seeming effusive will make them look goofy and unprofessional. But here’s what you must remember: it’s the hot tamale who wins the day, not the girl who’s as cool as a cucumber. As soon as you meet the interviewer, try to be fully present. Take in the space, the ambience, the person, and if something about the situation moves you, go ahead and say so—like “I really like the open floor plan here. It must be a great environment to work in.”

When you answer questions about your educational or work history, let your enthusiasm about different projects and situations come through (e.g., “It was so much more than I could have hoped for in an internship. I had the chance to actually write up the newsletter and work with a designer to put it together. I loved every minute of it.”). You don’t want to sound like a phony, though. Be authentic, sharing the positive feelings you experienced. And under no circumstances should you say anything negative about a previous school, company, or boss, even if the interviewer opens the door to it.

It’s important, too, that your answers be intelligent, so anticipate in advance what questions you are likely to be asked (researching the job and the company will give you direction about what questions might arise) and prepare responses. When I asked one college grad in an interview a few years ago what her favorite magazine was—a question she could easily have anticipated—you know what her answer was?
Glamour.
That sure wasn’t showing the love!

Some tricky questions may be shot at you—about a low GPA, for instance, or a firing, or a gap in your résumé. You should not only prepare answers but also rehearse them so you don’t sound awkward responding. Your answers should be concise and nonevasive, and you should frame things as positively as possible. Instead of “I was never superhappy with my major, so I don’t think I did as well as I could have,” say, “As much as I enjoyed my courses, I felt really passionate about my work at the campus radio station and poured a lot of my energy into that.”

And remember that showing the love means not making things disproportionately about
you.
That may sound hardhearted, but as I said before, most employers don’t
care
about your personal needs. They want to know what you can do to meet
their
needs. So don’t make comments that reflect any urgent desires of your own—such as “I really need to find a job in Denver” or “I’m anxious to get my foot in the door.” In the SHRM survey I initiated, many managers said they didn’t like hearing the phrase, “It’s my dream job.” Why? In part because it seems insincere but also because
it’s all about you
! Instead make comments such as “The work you’re doing here is very exciting. I think I could make an important contribution.”

Eventually the interviewer will ask if you have any questions. Never, ever,
ever
let the phrase “No, I think you’ve answered everything” escape from your lips. You need to have three or four smart questions ready, and it’s nice to have them on a note card you take out so you really seem prepared. Good questions are those that show that you not only want the job, you are prepared to knock the ball out of the park once you have it. So ask, “What would a successful year in the job look like?” or “What did you most value in the person who left?” You’ve done a Google search of the field and the company, of course, and one of your questions could be about emerging trends. Interviewers love it when questions relate to them and their accomplishments (“I’ve heard you made some exciting changes recently. What has the outcome been?”).

Ask for the Business

The first major job I ever went after was editor in chief of
Child
magazine, and I wanted it sooo badly. I made it through two interviews and was invited to a third with the publisher and the president of the company’s magazine division. I knew I must be one of the final candidates. At the end of the meeting, the publisher asked if I had any additional questions. Without even realizing what I was about to say, I told her no (I’d already asked my three questions and then some), but there was something I wanted to add. “I’ve loved learning about the position,” I said. “It sounds incredibly exciting, and I know I could take the magazine exactly where you want to go.”

I got the job. Not long afterward the publisher took me to lunch, and just as we were finishing, she looked at me and smiled. “You know what we really liked about you at that final interview,” she said. “We liked that you asked for the business.” I hadn’t heard that phrase before—I’d simply been acting instinctively that day, hungry for the job—but I later learned that it’s a phrase commonly used in sales. A good salesperson closes a meeting by boldly asking for the order. And that’s what you need to do at the end of an interview. Come right out and say you want it: “It’s been great hearing you talk about the position. I’d love to work here, and I think I could do a terrific job for you.”

A salesperson I know puts it this way: “In the case of a tie, the person who wants it the most wins.” Let them know you want it. Just don’t look desperate. Saying it once should be enough. And under no circumstances should you grab the interviewer around the ankles!

Another Special Note for Gen Y

Over and over again, I hear people who hire complain that Gen Y job candidates are often too familiar-acting in interviews. Maybe it’s because they grew up interacting more casually with adults than previous generations. It can really rub baby boomers and members of Gen X the wrong way. And those are the people who most likely will be interviewing you for jobs.

Let me give you a few examples. During a job interview, a candidate asked one of my top editors at
Cosmo
a question about our celebrity coverage. After the editor responded, the candidate replied, “Good answer.” Your role as a job candidate does not involve critiquing the person interviewing you!

And here’s a real doozy. A year or so ago, a woman who came in for an exploratory interview announced upon meeting me, “You’re adorable. I want to wrap you up and take you home.” Ugh. The only person I wouldn’t mind hearing that comment from is George Clooney.

In an attempt to be charming and not appear uptight, do not be cutesy or try to seem buddy-buddy with the interviewer. In fact, unless you are talking about work matters, avoid any personal statements or questions that include the word “you” or “your.” A Gen Y job candidate asked me lately, “How’s your day going so far?” and even that seemed just too nosey.

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