I Want You to Want Me (Rock Star Romance #2) (18 page)

She had a choice, right then. She could—

Oh, who was she kidding? She had no choice. She wanted him just as desperately. “Derek,” she sighed as her mouth opened and their tongues met in a burst of sensation that kick-started the heart she’d neglected for so, so long.

She felt the surge of energy in his body as he tightened around her, and she let herself, go. Just let herself fall into him, into
them
.

“Oh, fuck, V.” One hand slid down her back to grip her
ass. “Oh,
fuck
.” He kissed her under the hot sun, the strains of Mazzy Star’s “Fade into You” weaving around them. His hunger undid her, popped all the bindings from her heart, and she sank into him. The wet heat of his mouth, the urgent licks of his tongue. A shiver coursed through her.

Lowering her to the soft earth, his big, hard body came down on top of her, anchoring her to the ground. He cupped her chin to bring her mouth back to his as his tongue stroked inside, a knee pushing between her thighs.

“Wait.”

She saw the desolation on his features, but she just reached for the quilt, started to drag it over.

“Oh, thank Christ.” He lifted off her and flicked it open. They watched it billow to the ground. She scrambled onto it, laughing as she threw off her T-shirt and unbuttoned her shorts.

She could have him. Right here, in the middle of her wildflowers. Then, every time she came out here she’d get that rush, that tightening, that glorious memory of when she’d let herself go, gave herself completely to this dazzling man.

He reached behind her back, unclasped her bra. Peeling it off and tossing it aside, he cupped her breasts. “You are so beautiful, V.” His mouth covered her nipple, and the outrageous sensual heat made her body rise into his touch. His tongue licked so gently, heat poured through her, melting her.

She grabbed the back of his head, holding him in place. “I’ve never wanted anybody the way I want you.”

His thumb flicked over a nipple, and he moved down her stomach, pressing open-mouthed kisses over her heated skin.

Tugging off her underpants, he tossed them. One finger delved between her folds, and he moaned, eyes closing. His hips thrust, his erection pressing into her hip.

Oh, my God.
Sensation rode through her, so hard, so heady, she didn’t know what to do with herself. The faintest ocean breeze fluttered across the flowers, offering a hint of cool on her blazing hot skin. Her fingers sifted through his silky hair, and she could hardly believe Derek Valencia had come for her. Was here, loving her like she was a feast.

His kisses sucked at her skin, each one placed hungrily, confessing his insatiable need. For
her
. The slide of his finger along her slick length made her bones turn liquid, desire streaming through her. When his finger circled her clit, a crack of pleasure hit with such intensity, a shudder rocked through her.

Nothing had ever felt so good.

“Fuck, V. Look at you.” He shifted down between her legs, his shoulders nudging them apart. And then his tongue was on her, swirling deliciously around her sensitive nub. So good, so, so good. Her body turned hot, electric.

He loved her so ardently she wanted to cry. No one had ever wanted her this badly. Ever.

No, no, that wasn’t it at all. That wasn’t what had her in such a state. It was her.
She’d
never wanted anyone so badly, so wildly. Her body just opened for him in every way. He was pure, clean water, pouring into her every crevice and crack. Filling every hidden part of her.

Tension quickened, tightened. He slid one hand under her bottom, lifting her to his mouth, while the other glided up her stomach until it cupped a breast. He caressed it, flicking a thumb back and forth over her nipple, and when he gently pinched it, her hips shot up. Desire burst deep within, setting off electrical explosions.

She didn’t think she could take any more. It was too intense. She needed to crest, to break, but it didn’t end. All her senses engaged, and she felt everything. The lusty caress of his hand on her breast, the swirling lick of his tongue on her clit, the soft and frantic brush of his hair on her inner thighs. Oh, God, oh—

Every muscle in her body seized, the circuits in her mind shorted out, as she finally hit the peak and went soaring off the edge.

“Derek,” she cried, holding his head tightly against her, rocking her hips, riding out the most intense orgasm of her life. And when she came back into her body, the aftereffects continued to pulse and spark through her veins. She blinked against the sunlight streaking through the limbs overhead. And then she exhaled.

Oh, God, that was
delicious
.

He kissed her inner thigh, then came back up to her and kissed her mouth.

She lifted his T-shirt, and he reached behind his neck and yanked it off. Then, he shrugged off his jeans, reaching into a pocket to pull out his wallet. He fished out a condom, then tossed the wallet aside.

Just as he tore the packet open, she took the condom from him, rising. “Let me.” A new rush of desire hit her hard, making her hands tremble. “You don’t know how badly I’ve wanted to see you. Touch you.”

He shuddered, dropping his gaze to watch her hand grasp his erection. Just the feel of him, insanely hard and throbbing, gave her an aching hunger unlike anything she’d ever felt. She slid her hand along the length of him, and he stuttered out a rough exhalation.

“V.”

“No, let me.” Everything about this man was strong, powerful. He was intensely, uncompromisingly masculine. And she loved it. She had to taste him, so she lowered her mouth and licked him all around the head. He hissed out a breath, as her hands slid around to the back of his powerful thighs and drew him closer, her tongue and lips coasting all around his hard, smooth length. As soon as she got him nice and wet, she sucked him all the way to the back of her throat.

“Fuck, V.
Jesus
.” His hands clamped around her head and his hips thrust, sending him deeper. “Sorry, shit, sorry.”

She shook her head, she loved it. Loved how she excited him. Her tongue traced the vein underneath, then circled the head.

She loved the sounds he made, like he was out of control, loved the way his fingers curled into her hair. She sucked him hard, lodging him deeper into her throat, and he shouted, “Fuck.”

He pulled out, snatched the condom from her, and then eased her onto her back. “I have to have you, V.
Have
to.”

Clasping her hand in his, he brought it over her head as he stretched out over her, his erection gently prodding at her opening, slipping between her folds and sliding deliciously along her length. As if she wasn’t ready enough for him, he continued his assault, striking her clit with each pass.

She moaned, hips undulating, as she reached for his bottom, grasped him, and pulled him tightly against her.

The moment he thrust inside, he let out the sexiest sigh she’d ever heard—like he’d finally made it home. And she was it. Happiness crashed over her. The intimacy with this man, it just overwhelmed her.

“I’m not going to last, V.” His head reared back. “Oh, fuck, I’m not going to last.”

She wanted the moment to last forever, the clear blue sky, the sweet scent of her wildflowers, the desperate thrust of his powerful hips—but she couldn’t hold back the momentum, the barreling rush of desire. Something he did with his hips, the way he snapped them at just the right moment, made his pelvis scrape over her clit, lighting her up. He did it faster and faster, ratcheting her arousal so high and tight she couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think.

Her neck arched as her fingers fisted in the soft cotton blanket. And then her orgasm hit and held her in its relentless, euphoric grip. She pulled her hand out of his, and her arms came up around his back, her fingers digging into his skin. She needed him close, closer, as her feet braced on the ground and her hips rocked up hard, meeting his slamming thrusts.

He buried his face in her neck. “Violet. Oh, fuck.” And then he surged into her, clamping his hands on her hips to hold her in place as he pounded into her. Losing his rhythm, their bodies slick and hot, he cried out with his release. His grip loosened, his thrusts slowly turned languid.

Easing out of her, he rolled onto his back, finding her hand and clasping it tightly in his. His other arm rested over his forehead and he turned to look at her. “I don’t know what the hell that was, but can we do it again?”

She turned, too, holding on to his powerful bicep. “Yeah,” she breathed. She just felt so good. So relaxed, so perfectly content.

He exhaled roughly, squeezed her hand. “Are we good?”

Oh. Her skin went from cooling down to chilled. Oh, God. She wanted to sit up, grab her clothes,
cover
herself. But some twisted sense of civility pinned her to the ground.

Were they
good
?

Did he mistake her for Gen?

She’d thought . . . God, she felt so confused. She’d thought she’d meant something to him. That he had feelings for her. But . . . is that where the whole sex god tag came from? That he could make women feel cherished? Make them think for those few moments they were the object of his feral desire?

He turned onto his side, his palm on her stomach.

Anger whipped through her, and she shoved his hand off. She did get up, then. And she reached for her bra.

“What happened? What’d I say?”

“What about me made you think I was in any way like Gen?”

He shot up, wide-eyed. “I don’t. I’m not . . . What . . . What the hell just happened?”

“Are we
good
? Well, let’s see.” She stabbed an arm through her bra, shoving the strap up on her shoulder. “I won’t cause problems for you, if that’s what you mean. You can go about your business now that you’ve had your way with me.”

A smile spread quickly across his ridiculously handsome features. And then he burst out laughing.

She reached past him for her T-shirt, but he snatched it. They played a tug-of-war with it, and it just sent her into a rage. Not only had he screwed her out of his system, but now he was laughing at her humiliation?

Oh, God, she hated him. “Give it to me.” She yanked on it, but he wouldn’t let go.

His arms came around her, his mouth trying to make contact with her cheek, but she squirmed away from him. His laughter faded, his arms tightened. He gripped her until she couldn’t move. Heat poured through her, anger a burning fire in her gut.

“I didn’t mean it like that. I meant, Are you upset? I’ve been pushing for something you didn’t want to give, and then I just came out here and took it.” She could feel his smile against her cheek. His fingers stroked her skin, but he didn’t loosen his hold.

“You said, Are we good? Like you wanted to make sure I wouldn’t pitch a fit now that we’d finally done the deed. I
thought it meant you were hoping I’d behave like all your other women once you’re done with them.”

“I’m not done with you. How can I be done with you? We’ve just begun. I’m crazy about you, V. You know that.”

The faintest breeze crossed her skin, and she felt herself cooling down. She supposed she did know that. “Can I have my shirt, please?”

He got up, reaching for his clothes. “I don’t want to leave, but I’ve got to get back to the house. We’re having a band meeting to figure out what to do next.” Shirtless, wearing nothing but his jeans, he crouched before her, cupping her chin. “Hey. Are you okay?”

She was ruining it. Ruining this perfect moment she’d wanted to capture in a jar and preserve forever. She’d always vaguely hoped she wasn’t as damaged as the social worker had implied, but in this moment she knew she was. Because who reacted like that after just making wild, passionate love in a field? He’d come to her, claimed her, and she’d freaked?

She didn’t want to be this person. She wanted to be free, uninhibited. She wanted to abandon herself to passion.

She wanted to be normal.

God, then just freaking be normal.
She let out a shaky breath and let go of her anxiety, let herself take in all the hunky gorgeousness of Derek Valencia. She smiled. “I’m better than okay.”
Because I’m yours.

Even if it was only for now.

When they entered the house through the back door, they found the band sitting around the big, rustic farm table. Violet couldn’t miss their confused expressions as they all turned as one to watch them come in.

And, then, of course, it struck her. How she must look. Her hair, her clothes. She looked like she’d had sex in a field with their bass player.

She was
such
a slut. And one side of her mouth curled because she thoroughly enjoyed the feeling. Something deep inside of her awakened, took a leap into the air, and did a little cheerleader kick because she’d let herself go. She’d given herself over to passion.

“Oh, good, you’re here,” Emmie said. “Come sit down.”

Derek headed for the table, but the moment she parted from him, intending to help Francesca at the kitchen counter, he tugged her to him, one hand wrapping around her back, settling above her ass. “Where you going?”

She gave him a smile, loving the way he always wanted her close. “I’m just going to make us some lunch. I doubt anyone’s eaten.”

“Sit with us. We gotta figure shit out.”

“I know.” She nudged him. “Go.”

“You’re part of this.”

“No, I’m not.” She wasn’t about to interfere with band business, but he still didn’t let go, just dragged her to the table.

Slater got up, pulling out a chair for her—as though she naturally belonged with them. “I feel like shit for what happened to you last night. Are you okay?”

“He didn’t hurt me.”

“Emmie told me, but I needed to hear it from you.”

And a little bit more of what was buried deep inside her roused because he seemed to genuinely care. “He blamed me for turning you guys away from him. He was high, and he was angry, but he didn’t hurt me.”

“That was some scary shit,” Cooper said.

“He doesn’t like the changes I’ve made.” She shrugged. “No one ever does.”

“Yeah, but has anyone ever gotten rough with you?” Cooper asked.

“Sure. But in most situations there’re bodyguards around. Honestly, it’s all right. It didn’t get far. How do you guys feel about putting him in rehab?”

Ben just shook his head. “He doesn’t want to be there.”

“They can’t keep him,” Cooper said.

“No, they can’t.” She couldn’t say she was surprised, but it didn’t bode well.

“It had to be done,” Emmie said softly, her hand clasped with Slater’s on his thigh. There was something different about them, but she couldn’t define it. They were always so tight, but just then they seemed—soft, all rounded edges and flowing into each other.

“So what’s going on?” Derek asked, one knee bouncing under the table. “You talk to Irwin?” Just then his phone buzzed. He picked it up, and she could see Gen’s name on the screen. His brows pulled in as he opened the text.

He read the screen, growing increasingly agitated. “Wonderful.”

Everyone’s phone buzzed, and they all quickly opened their texts and started reading.

Emmie sucked in a breath. “Oh, no. This isn’t good.”

Violet got up, just as Francesca set the pitcher of
lemonade on the table. “Do we have enough bread to make sandwiches?”

“We do.” Her friend squeezed her arm. “You okay?” she whispered.

“It’s been a rough twenty-four hours.”

Francesca gave her a sympathetic smile.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Cooper said.

Violet glanced over to see Derek still reading. She recognized that look. He only got it when he was dealing with his dad.
What’d the jerk do now?

“How did they find out?” Slater asked. “We just got him in there.”

“We’re the only ones who know,” Ben said.

“I’d better call Irwin.” Emmie got up. “Damn, I’d wanted to talk to you guys first, come up with a game plan.”

“Well, hang on,” Slater said. “We’ll talk now. No matter what, we’re more important than Irwin or record deals or any of this shit.” He watched them reading their screens. “Guys, fuck the article. What’re we gonna do? Call off the tour? Postpone it?”

Derek’s expression . . . She sensed more going on than just anger over a journalist finding out about Pete. She wanted to go to him, but Emmie was there first. Hands on his shoulders, she peered down at his screen. “Don’t let him get to you.”

He sat rigidly, his mouth a tight line, his forehead a series of harsh lines. “Son of a bitch.”

“He’s an asshole,” Slater said.

“No one respects what he says,” Cooper said.

And that was it. Maybe the band wasn’t her business, but Derek was. “What’s going on? What does it say?” She squeezed Derek’s shoulder. “Tell me.”

Cooper showed her his phone. Violet startled at the blurry shot of Pete taken through the window of a cab. She skimmed the Beatz article until her gaze skidded on Eddie Valencia’s name.

Am I surprised? No, I can’t say I’m surprised. Look, you’ve either got the creative fire burning in your gut or you don’t. Without that core of true talent, these flash-in-the-pan bands will fall apart. Of course they
will. You can’t sustain success fueled by drugs, big name producers, splashy headlines, and hype. I feel bad for the kid, but hey, he had his fifteen minutes. That’s more than most people get.

In that moment, she didn’t care about her job, her career, or what anyone else thought. She leaned over Derek, wrapped her arms around his neck, and kissed his cheek. “He’s got a very small dick.”

Derek burst out laughing. Turning in his chair, he grabbed her, his hands going under her legs, forcing her to straddle him. In front of everyone, he kissed her. And then he pulled back, scrubbed his face, and said, “Fuck it.” One arm around her, he faced the band. “Fuck him.” He tossed his phone onto the table. “We hire a temp keyboardist. Get back on tour.”

“Hang on,” Slater said. “We should talk about options. I want to be sure we make the right decision for the right reasons.”

“Yeah, I mean, I want the record to go gold as much as you,” Cooper said. “But that can’t be the reason we get back on tour.”

Violet felt Derek’s body tense. She got off his lap and faced them. “You know, Coop. I’m not sure what to make of that comment. I’ve only been with you guys a little over a month, but I’ve only ever seen Derek do what he felt was best for the band. And, frankly, I think he’s right. This isn’t about record sales. It’s about preserving your contract, your reputation. I know you guys care about the band first, but this is a business. And you do have to think about your future. If you bail on this tour while Pete’s in rehab, who’ll ever work with you again? Not when you can hire a replacement and get right back at it. Derek’s right. Get back out there and finish the tour. Pete’ll be there for the next album.”

Silence gripped the room. She’d completely overstepped her bounds as a minder. But Derek had enough people attacking him. He needed support. Especially when their inactivity forced all the business decisions onto him.

“I agree,” Emmie said, breaking the tension.

Cooper gave Derek a chin nod. “Sorry, man. I didn’t mean it like that.” He played with a spoon. “I just . . . Fuck,
I can’t believe this is happening. I thought for sure he’d get his shit together.”

Ben tilted his chair back, balancing on the back legs. “You’re right, V. So Pete misses a few gigs. So what? He’ll come out stronger, ready to handle his shit for the next tour.”

She didn’t miss the way Ben called her V. He’d never used a nickname with her before.

“Okay, so before I call Irwin,” Emmie said. “How much time do we need? To audition some keyboard players, practice with them till they get the songs down? How soon before we can get you guys back on the road?”

“Wait, guys, before we talk about that, why don’t we get Gen out here,” Ben said. “Do some damage control.”

Gen?
She didn’t mind having the band here, but Gen and all her posturing? This was Violet’s home, her refuge. She didn’t want Gen here.

“No,” Derek said. “She doesn’t need to come out here. We can have a conference call or Skype.”

Thank you.
She didn’t want to let her personal feelings interfere with the important decisions they needed to make as a band, so she headed to the counter, pulling a big loaf of bread out of the paper bag from the bakery.

She heard a chair scrape back but kept her attention on the roasted chicken Francesca had taken out of the fridge. Should she make chicken salad sandwiches? The meat would go farther that way. She could add grapes—
oh
.

Hands gripped her hips, and that familiar scent washed over her as Derek nuzzled her neck. “You claimed me.”

Heat spread up her neck. “What do you mean?”

“In front of the band. You claimed me. That was hot.”

“They’re not stupid. I’m sure they saw the weeds in my hair and grass stains on my butt.” She tore lettuce leaves off the head.

His hands slid around her waist, and he pulled her back toward him. His body shuddered with laughter. “You don’t have grass stains, but you do look well fucked.”

She smiled, tilting her head against his shoulder. “Does that pass as a compliment in your world?”

“Fuck, yeah. And you can plan on me keeping you that way.”

A sizzle of excitement shot through her, and she squeezed his arm.

And then he released her, returning to the group.

“Okay, one thing at a time,” Emmie said. “First of all, Violet?”

Grabbing a towel, she wiped her hands and turned to them.

“Is there a hotel or a bed-and-breakfast close by?” She looked to the guys. “I guess we could go to the city.”

Derek shot Violet a worried look that let her know exactly where he wanted to stay. She couldn’t help smiling at him. “You don’t need a hotel. If you can handle the quiet of the farm, you’re all welcome to stay here.”
Although, FYI, that invitation doesn’t extend to former girlfriends.

“I don’t want to impose,” Slater said. “Francesca?”

Her friend gave him a lovely smile, lifting the back of her hand to brush hair out of her eyes. “You’re very welcome to stay.”

“It’s a big house,” Violet said. “And there’s a smaller in-law house out back. We’ve got plenty of room.”

“We’ll stay,” Derek said.

“Don’t be a baby,” Ben said with a laugh. “I think you can live without her for a few days.”

“But I don’t want to.” Derek sounded grumpy, and she found it adorable.

“Well, if it’s okay with you, we’d love to stay,” Emmie said. “Your farm is amazing. I’ve never seen anything like it, and we could use a little peace and quiet. Ben, could you please text Abe and ask him to bring the instruments?”

Ben looked to Violet. “So much for the quiet.”

“The barn’s wired, and it’s set back from the house a little ways. We don’t have animals anymore, so it’s all yours.”

“Are you serious?” Cooper said. “That would be awesome. We haven’t played just for fun in a year.” He gazed out the window over the sink. “This place is insane.”

Her heart expanded, so pleased they appreciated it.

“He should bring the weights, too,” Slater said.

Ben nodded, while texting.

“Okay, next.” Emmie grabbed a pen and piece of note paper off the built-in desk. “I’ll get on the phone with Irwin. Derek, can you set up a time to talk to Gen? Give me a chance
to talk to Irwin—maybe an hour or so? Let’s set up a conference call, spin our news the right way. Violet, do you have a computer we can use?”

“Of course. Come with me.” She looked to Francesca to see if she could handle lunch by herself, and her friend nodded,
Of course
.

As much as she loved the peace and quiet of her farm, she did love the idea of the guys filling up the space with their music, their bawdy conversation, and their laughter.

And, of course, more sexy time with Derek.

•   •   •

Derek
came back into the bedroom after a run along the beach to find his girl had kicked off the sheets.

A bolt of lust shot down his spine and fired up his dick. As he stood there, dumbstruck by her natural beauty and sensuality, she gave him a sleepy, satisfied smile. And the need to take her hit him hard and fierce.

He should leave her alone. He’d had her what? Three, four times the night before? But fuck him, he couldn’t get enough of her.

Watching him, she sat up, her breasts bouncing as she got up on her knees, arms open to him.

He walked right into them and kissed her. Her arms slid up his back, cupping his shoulders, and she pressed him to her. The caress of her tongue, those beaded nipples on his bare chest, made him wild with want.

Tugging on his shorts, she said, “Off.”

The moment he’d kicked them aside, she reached between them, her hand gliding up his cock, and he went hard as a pike.

He smoothed one hand up her back—the softest, smoothest skin he’d ever felt—and cupped her ass cheek with the other.

She lowered them both to the mattress, hips pitching forward, and she breathed his name.

Sensation broke across his skin, and everything in him tightened with want. Gripping her hips, he pulled her to him hard, sliding his dick between her legs, coating it with her warm honey.

“You make me crazy. Is it too much? Can I . . .”

“Yes,” she whispered, shifting her legs to welcome him in.

Oh, hell.
Jesus
. He couldn’t believe how good she made him feel. He gripped himself, watching as he nudged at her entrance, pushed inside her glistening folds. His skin pulled taut as a wave of pure desire swept over him.

She moaned, clutching his ass and driving him deep inside. Good God, he lit up. So tight, so hot, so fucking sexy. He pulled back and thrust into her, harder this time, and her slick arousal made him shudder.

Pressing closer to her, he cupped her breast and oh, fuck, the feel of that gorgeous fullness, the nipple beading in his palm, gave him an erotic rush that made him even harder.

“Derek,” she cried, voice thick with desire.

No one turned him on like she did. No one. He hammered into her, losing his mind in all her soft skin, that tight, hot channel, and her desperate cries. Fingers digging into her hip, he held her right where he needed her, slamming into her, as she pushed right back into him. Her face turned into his neck as she moaned, hands still on his ass to keep him tight against her.