Ice Kissed (11 page)

“It can’t,” I agreed, somehow managing to force out the two most painful words I’d ever spoken. My throat wanted to close up around them, swallowing them completely, but I had to say them.

I knew that Ridley was saying this so I wouldn’t have to. He was doing this to spare me the discomfort of actually having to form the words. But that didn’t make this conversation any less painful.

“It’s too much of a risk for you.” Then Ridley shook his head, correcting himself. “For both of us, really. I could lose my position as the
Ö
verste, and before I honestly wouldn’t have cared that much. But with us going after Viktor D
å
lig, I want to be there on the front lines.”

“As you should be,” I said. “Working with Kasper, this is my big chance to make a good impression for the H
ö
gdragen. I can’t blow that by giving anyone any reason to think I might have gotten where I am by sleeping with my boss.

“And you’ll be busy with your work,” I continued. “And I’ll be gone for a long time. There’s not even any point to us, even if we wanted there to be.”

Ridley looked me in the eyes for the first time since we’d woken up. There was so much unsaid, so much hanging between us, the air felt thicker. All I wanted to do was kiss him one last time, but I knew that would only make things harder.

“And there’s Juni,” Ridley said, breaking the moment, and I lowered my eyes. “She’s not my girlfriend, but she deserves better than this.”

“She does,” I said, and I meant it. Juni had to be one of the nicest people I’d ever met, and I sincerely doubted she would approve of Ridley spending the night with me.

“Whatever has been going on with us lately…” He trailed off, waiting several moments before finishing. “It has to be over now. Last night was it. That was the last time.”

I nodded, because I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to speak if I tried. He was right, and I agreed with him entirely. If he hadn’t said it, I would’ve.

But it still broke my heart. The intensity and the severity of the ache in my chest was something that I hadn’t been expecting. It hurt so badly it almost took my breath away.

So I bit the inside of my cheek, focusing on the pain, and stared down at the floor, waiting for this moment to be over. Ridley finished gathering up his things, and I didn’t look at him or say a word. I didn’t even move until I heard the door shut behind him.

Then I ran a hand through my hair, took a deep breath, and finished packing. It was the only thing I could do to keep from screaming.

SEVENTEEN

recrudescence

Under the twilight sky, the palace in Storvatten left me just as awestruck as when I’d first laid eyes on it. Its walls were made of luminous pale cerulean, curved and molded to look like waves swirling around the palace. Several spires soared high into the air, and in the fading light, set against the amethyst sky, the glass always seemed to glow.

Kasper and I walked along the long dock that connected the palace with the shore, since it sat like an island fortress several miles out into Lake Superior. It was a long walk, but it gave us plenty of time to admire the beauty of the fantastical structure that rose from the water, leaving a mirrored reflection beside it.

It was much warmer in Storvatten than it had been in Doldastam, with all of the snow melted. There was no ice on the lake near the palace, but I suspected that had more to do with Skojare magic than it did with the temperature. A lake frozen through is no place to swim.

When we reached the doors of the palace, Kasper paused to smooth out his uniform, even though it didn’t need smoothing. For our long journey south, we’d worn comfortable attire, but to greet royalty we couldn’t look like we’d been traveling all day.

At the end of the dock, before we left our SUV with a valet, Kasper had put on his uniform, and I’d changed into a simple but elegant white dress. On the drive, I’d already touched up my makeup and put my hair into a cascading side braid. Fortunately, the bruise on my temple had faded enough that I was finally able to mask it entirely with concealer.

Kasper used the large, heavy knocker, which commanded a low booming sound that seemed to resonate through everything. While we waited for the footman to answer, I took a moment to admire the massive iron doors. The last time I was here, I hadn’t noticed the intricate designs carved into them. They showed
Æ
gir—the Norse god of the sea—with waves crashing around him.

As soon as the footman opened the door, I heard a voice booming behind him. Despite its cheery tone, it had a thunderous quality, much like King Mikko’s, so I knew it had to be Mikko’s younger brother, Prince Kennet Bi
â
else.

“Let them in, let them in,” Kennet commanded. He shooed the footman away and opened the door wider, smiling broadly at me. “You’ve had a long journey. Come inside.”

I returned his smile and stepped inside past him, noting that he smelled faintly but rather deliciously of the sea. But the scent was mixed with something else, something refreshing and cool, like rain on a spring day or an arctic breeze. I wasn’t sure exactly what it was, but I couldn’t help but breathe in more deeply anyway.

“The King, the Queen, and Lisbet arrived about fifteen minutes before you did,” Kennet explained. “They extend their apologies, but they’re exhausted from their trip and have retired for the evening. So I’ll be showing you to your rooms and getting you anything you’d like.”

“Showing us to our rooms will be enough,” Kasper said as he admired the main hall.

The rounded walls were sandblasted glass—opaque with a hint of light turquoise showing through. Like the outside of the palace, they were shaped to look like waves. They curved around us, making it feel as though we were standing in the center of a whirlpool.

Beneath our feet, the floors were glass, allowing us a glimpse of the pool below. It was empty now, but when I’d been here before, I’d seen royalty swimming in it. Above us, chandeliers of diamonds and sapphires sparkled, splashing shards of light all around the room.

“To your rooms it is,” Kennet said with a bright smile, and he turned to lead us out of the main hall down to the quarters where we’d be staying.

Even though it was late, Kennet still wore a suit, and I’d never actually seen him in anything else. This time it was a frosty gray that shimmered silver when the light hit it right, and it was perfectly tailored for his well-toned frame.

Both Kennet and his older brother, Mikko, were very handsome: golden hair, dazzling aqua eyes, strong jaws, perfect complexions, and deep, powerful voices. Kennet was slightly shorter and more slender than his brother, but he didn’t appear any less muscular.

“I didn’t expect you back so soon,” Kennet said, lowering his voice as though he were confiding in me. He walked beside me down the corridor, while Kasper followed a step behind. “But I have to admit, I’m happy you are.”

“I’m just happy it’s under much better circumstances,” I replied carefully.

“Ah, yes. With the Queen back, it is a time of much celebration.” His voice rose with excitement when he spoke, but then he looked down at me, smiling with a glint in his eye. “Hopefully that means our time together will be much more fun this time around.”

It occurred to me that Ridley had been right when we were here before (as painful as it was to think of Ridley in any capacity right now). He’d thought that Kennet had been flirting with me, and I’d brushed it off as nonsense. But now I was beginning to see the merit in the idea.

Ordinarily, I would consider it a bad idea to flirt with a Prince. It could be rather dangerous, in fact. But considering that something very strange was going on in this palace, having another member of the royal family on my side wouldn’t be a bad thing.

“I’m certain it will be,” I said, attempting to match Kennet’s playful grin with my own, and he laughed warmly.

Kennet led us down the spiral staircase toward the private quarters. The main floor was entirely above the surface of the lake, while the private quarters and the ballroom were located underneath the water. As soon as we went downstairs, the musty scent grew stronger.

While an underwater palace sounded like a magical and grand thing, the impracticality of it seemed to have taken its toll. Wallpaper lined the hallway—blue with an icy sheen—but it had begun to peel at some of the corners. Even the navy-and-white checked tiles on the floor had begun to warp in a few places. All damage from the constant moisture of being in a lake.

As I suspected, Kennet led me to the room I had stayed in before, after first dropping Kasper off several doors away. The valet had already carried my bags down, and I was pleased to find them sitting on the lush bedding.

The wall to the outside bowed out, like a fishbowl, and the darkness of the water seemed to engulf the room. Despite all its luxurious trappings, the room filled me with a sense of unease. Like I was a dolphin on display at a zoo.

“In case you don’t remember from last time, the bathroom is across the hall,” Kennet explained; he’d followed me inside the room, standing directly behind me as I stared out at the lake. “My room is in the other wing, should you need me for anything at all.”

I turned back to face him, and despite the gnawing ache in my heart over Ridley, there was something in Kennet’s smile that made it … not exactly easy to smile back, but at least not so hard and not quite so painful.

“I trust that the room is in order for you,” Kennet asked, and I realized he hadn’t taken his eyes off me since we’d entered the room.

Smiling, I gestured around me. “It’s perfect, thank you.”

“If there’s anything you desire, I’ll be happy to get it for you.” And there it was again. A glint in his eye that somehow seemed both dangerous and a bit charming.

“Thank you, but right now the only thing I desire is a good night’s sleep,” I told him politely.

He arched an eyebrow. “You will let me know if that changes?”

“Of course.”

When he left, shutting the door behind him, I let out a deep breath and collapsed on the bed behind me. The day had left me exhausted in ways I didn’t even know were possible. It still felt as if a hole had been torn inside me, as if my very insides had been ripped out, leaving a cold shell.

But there was no time to cry or mourn what might have been between Ridley and me. It was over, the way it should’ve been a long time ago, and the only thing I could do was push past it and hope that eventually the pain would get more bearable.

EIGHTEEN

exchequer

First thing in the morning, Kennet took Kasper and me down to the guard station. The last time I’d been here, when Ridley and I had been investigating Linnea’s disappearance, we’d been denied access to the guards.

This time, Kasper and I were here specifically to see if there was any truth to Linnea’s concerns and to implement new standards for the guards so they’d be better protection for the royalty. That meant we had to be directly involved with the guards.

The guard station was a small round room at the center of the lower level of the palace. It was sparsely decorated, with three large paintings of the royal family the only adornments on its white walls. Four large desks were placed at odd angles, along with several filing cabinets.

Much like the rest of the palace, everything in this room looked as though it had seen better days, save for the steel vault on the other side of the room. It appeared to be sterling and new, as though it would fit better in a bank vault than an old office.

Hunched over one of the desks, a guard scribbled something down on a notepad. His golden hair was slicked back until it curled at the nape of his neck, with just a hint of silver at his temples revealing his age. Under the tailored sleeves of his dress shirt, his shoulders were broad and his biceps were rather thick.

Another man—younger than the first, closer to my age—with a slender build and a slightly upturned nose, sat perched on the edge of the desk. He’d been leaning over, watching what the older man was writing, but he instantly hopped to his feet when we walked into the room.

“Your Highness,” he said, bowing before Kennet.

The other man, who had been working on something, rose more slowly.

“No need for the formalities.” Kennet brushed them off and glanced back at Kasper and me. “Bayle can be old school at times. He’s a relic from Father’s reign.” The older guard grimaced, not that I blamed him, but Kennet turned back to him with a smile. “I’m just here to make the introductions. These are our friends from the Kanin, Bryn Aven and Kasper Abbott.”

“Nice to meet you,” the younger man said, but he didn’t really looked pleased to meet us, nor did he introduce himself.

“I’m Bayle Lundeen.” The older man came around the desk to shake our hands. “I’m the head guard. Anything you need, I should be able to help you.”

“They’re actually here to help
you,
” Kennet reminded him. “We need to revamp things so the Queen feels safe in her own home.”

“Yes, of course.” Bayle smiled wanly at us. “I’ll do my best to implement any changes that the King and Queen see fit to impose.”

“I just hope a uniform isn’t one of them.” The younger guard snickered, and Bayle shot him a glare.

Kasper had worn his H
ö
gdragen uniform, the way he did any time he was working. Since I wasn’t officially on the H
ö
gdragen, I wasn’t allowed to wear one, so I’d gone with a modified version of a tracker solider uniform: tailored black linen with epaulets, but not nearly as flashy as the silver and black velvet one Kasper wore.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t catch your name,” Kasper said, his tone even and polite.

“Cyrano Moen.” The younger man straightened up, raising his chin. “I’m the Queen’s personal guard.”

“Well, Cyrano, it’s funny that you mention uniforms, because I was actually going to suggest them,” Kasper said, causing Cyrano to scowl.

“We’ve always had a dress code here.” Bayle gestured to his and Cyrano’s outfits, which were very businesslike—dark trousers, dress shirts, ties. Cyrano even had a suit jacket.