If It Walks Like A Killer (The Carolina Killer Files #1) (27 page)

Chapter Fifty

Rachael

Abby held her hand in Rachael’s face. “Hello? Rachael? Anybody home? Earth to Rachael.”

Rachael shook her head. “I’m sorry Abby, I was trying to listen. Do you recognize that woman over there?”

Abby looked over her shoulder to the table on her left.

“Who? Lela?”

“No, the older lady beside her. Has she ever been here before?”

“Oh, no. That must be the new one they brought in last night. I heard she attacked some cop.”

“What?” Rachael gasped.

“Yeah, some of the guys were talking about her this morning. I figured she was a repeater, but I’ve never seen her before.”

“She just looks so familiar to me. I can’t figure it out.” She continued to stare at the woman, sifting through her brain for where she’d seen her before.

“She doesn’t look familiar to me. You’ve probably seen her around town or something. Why does it matter so much?”

“I guess it doesn’t. It’d just be nice to see someone from the outside for once.”

“Right. Well, I’m done eating. Want to go sit outside for a while? They say it’s not too cold out today.”

“Sure.” Rachael picked up her tray absentmindedly and tried to put the woman out of her mind. As they walked out the double doors to the gated yard, Rachael was surprised to see a small amount of snow on the ground. It wasn’t even enough to cover all of the grass, small sprigs still poked through, but it took Rachael’s breath away nonetheless.

Abby bent down, picking up a small handful of snow and touching it to her lips. “My grandma used to make snow cream for me, every winter. She’d freeze bags of it and it’d be there even in the summer. When she died, they found six bags in her freezer, just waiting for us.”

“My best friend’s mom used to make some for us too. On snow days, I’d go over to her house and we’d fill up bowls of it, it was like we were cooking.”
Oh, Aud, why’d you have to go and make even the good memories bitter?
Suddenly Rachael felt an ice cold glob of snow slither its way down her back. She laughed, fanning her sweatshirt so it would fall out. “I can’t believe you did that.”

Abby stuck her tongue out at her, making Rachael laugh.

“Think there’s enough snow for a snowball fight?”

Rachael looked around to the white ground beneath her, some of it already melting. She bent over and scooped up a handful. “When there isn’t enough snow to make snowballs, my kids call it a snow-throw fight.” She screamed, tossing the snow at Abby and missing horribly. They both laughed, grabbing handfuls of snow and running away, forgetting about all of their problems, even if just for a moment.

Chapter Fifty-One

Pam

Pam threw her lunch away, placing her tray on the metal counter. Her heart pounded as she felt the metal fork sliding around in her shirt sleeve. She watched the lunch lady eyeing her tray, waiting for her to ask about the missing utensil. Instead, she began spraying it off, oblivious to anything suspicious.
She’s probably better suited in a Kindergarten lunch room.

Pam turned to walk out of the cafeteria, careful to make sure no one was behind her. Rachael and her friend had just left, so they couldn’t have gotten too far. Her pulse raced as she walked out the double cafeteria doors to the brick breezeway. She tried to remember the way back to the gathering room where Lela had shown her she could watch TV or read magazines, figuring Rachael must’ve gone that way. She was trying to decide whether the hall was to her left or right when she heard laughter. She looked over to see a small grassy area covered in snow, with picnic tables littered throughout. There was no one in sight until Rachael popped out from behind a table, throwing a snowball at her friend with very short black hair and pale skin. The girls didn’t see Pam at first, so she was free to watch them romp in the snow like children, not a care in the world. Like they were actually happy.
How dare she play in the snow when Blaire will never see or touch or play in the snow again.
She thought back to when Blaire was younger, trying to recall a single time they’d played in the snow together, built a snowman maybe, but she couldn’t. A combination of anger and nervousness built up in her throat as she ran her fingers over the fork, gently poking her fingers with the ends, wondering if they’d be enough to do the job.

Quieting her thoughts she stepped forward onto the grass, clutching the fork in her large sleeve tightly. “Can I play?”

***

Rachael

“Can I play?” The cigarette scarred voice asked from behind her.

Rachael spun on her heels to face the woman who’d looked so familiar in the cafeteria. She was a squat, blonde woman who might’ve been pretty once, but now looked wrinkled and exhausted. Her dark eyes almost looked eerily black, staring into Rachael’s eyes intently. “I’m sorry?”

“I asked if I could play.”

“Oh, this?” She looked at the snow melting in her palm. “We were just goofing off, not really playing. You’re new, right? I’m Rachael.”

“Pam.”

“It’s nice to meet you. This is Abby.”

The woman seemed agitated by everything Rachael said. “Everything okay?” Abby asked, still breathing hard from laughter.

“Oh, it’s fine. I just don’t understand how you girls are out here having fun. I mean, you are in jail after all.”

“Oh.” Rachael couldn’t help the sickly feeling that fell over her, something was not right. “Well, it gets better. I mean, its jail so it’s never good but I just take it one day at a time. You can’t be sad all the time, it only makes it worse. After a few days here, you’ll settle in and it won’t seem so bad.”

Pam smiled, though her smile gave Rachael a repulsive feeling in the pit of her stomach. “I see. I’m glad you’re all settled in then. I can’t help but think that the woman you murdered is far from ‘settled in’, wouldn’t you say?”

Her sentence was so far off subject, it took Rachael a second to realize what had been said. “Excuse me?”

“You are Rachael Abbott, aren’t you? The woman who murdered Blaire Underwood?”

“I—” Rachael started to defend herself before trailing off. It was then she realized just where she knew the woman from. Then that she realized where she’d seen those haunting brown eyes before, once filled with oceans of tears, now only with white hot rage. “You were in the courtroom, the day of my trial. You were there. Did you know Blaire?” She stepped back, out of pure instinct.

“She was my daughter,” Pam replied simply.

“Oh.” Rachael let silence fill the space between them, unsure of what to say or how to react. Her throat grew tight with tension as she stared at the woman for too long.

“Rach, we should go. We’re both sorry for your loss but we need to get back inside.” Abby filled the silence though neither Rachael nor Pam acknowledged that anything had been spoken. Abby pulled her arm, turning Rachael away and forcing her to walk the opposite direction, half dragging her.

Rachael was merely a few steps from the door when pain shot through her back. Hot and sharp, it was unlike anything she’d ever felt before. She staggered, letting out an animal like cry. She was vaguely aware of Pam running away, of Abby’s worried hands trying to prevent her from falling, asking what was wrong. She felt her knees smack the concrete walkway though she felt no pain. She heard Abby’s bloodcurdling screams as she laid her down slowly. She smelled blood, though how she knew it was blood she was unsure. She was unsure of a lot of things, once she thought about it. What was this pain? How could anything hurt so badly? What was so warm, dripping thickly into her mouth? Why were tears falling from her eyes? Where was she? Why was everything getting dark?

Chapter Fifty-Two

Shayna

Shayna Steele did not like hospitals. After her sister’s death, she’d prayed never to step foot back into one. She rushed through the first set of double doors, her curls flying behind her. “Hampton,” she shouted frantically as she spied him pacing the hallway.

“He won’t even bring her kids to see their mother.”

“Huh?” she asked, desperately trying to catch her breath.

“Caide. His wife is dying and he won’t even come to see her. Won’t even bring those kids to see her. Who does that? What kind of a person—” He sighed, meeting Shayna’s patient eyes.

“How is she?” Shayna noticed the puffiness that surrounded his eyes.

“They said we could go in, as long as we’re calm. It nicked an artery in her neck. Half an inch over and—” He stopped, breathing deeply and avoiding her eye contact. “I just can’t go in there and tell her that her kids aren’t coming. I can’t do it.”

“She needs you. She needs to see you, Hampton. You keep her calm, I’ve seen you do it. You can do this.” She placed her hand on the back of his arm and let him lead her to Rachael’s room. Her hands shaking, she pushed their way into the room and felt a lump rise in her throat.

Her blonde hair splayed across the pillow, Rachael had her neck covered in gauze and a small tube draining out of it into a bag draped beside the bed. Her skin looked nearly translucent under the fluorescent lights. Her eyes fluttered open at the sound of them shuffling into the room and Shayna found herself wondering if she might cry as she spied the cuffs hooking Rachael’s wrists to the hospital bed. She smiled at Rachael, trying not to glance at the pitiful look she knew Hampton would be wearing.

“Hey,” Shayna said softly.

Rachael nodded her head gently. “Am I going to make it?”

Hampton spoke up, his voice stiff. “Everything looks good. You’re stable. They’re saying they want to keep you here tonight to make sure you stay that way.”

“I wish I could say I was looking forward to getting out.” She gazed around the room as much as she could without moving her neck. “But this place sure beats the alternative.”

Shayna tried to smile at the halfhearted joke. “Rachael, do you remember what happened?”

Rachael closed her eyes for a second and Shayna wondered if she might be falling asleep. “I remember Blaire’s mom was there. She was at the jail.”

“She visited you?”

She attempted to shake her head, but stopped, wincing. “She was in jail, a prisoner, like me. She came up to me. She was so angry.”

“What did she say?” Shayna asked.

“Nothing, really. It wasn’t really what she said, it was how she stared at me. She hates me so, so much. I could see it. The doctors don’t really talk to me, they just sort of talk around me so I know she stabbed me, but I don’t remember it. I remember walking away. She must’ve done it then.” She moved her hand to her neck, rubbing the bandage.

“It’s okay, Rach. You don’t have to talk anymore if it’s bothering you.”

“It just feels weird, sort of numb.”

“Well, I don’t want you to worry. We will get this taken care of. Mrs. Underwood will pay for what she’s done to you.”

Rachael nodded, her fingers still rubbing the gauze. She looked as though she may be getting sleepy again. As silence filled the room, the door opened and an older nurse with boy cut gray hair entered. “Visiting hours are up. Only one visitor in the room overnight. I’m going to have to ask the other to leave.” She smiled politely at the three of them before ducking back out of the room.

Shayna looked at Hampton who was staring at Rachael sadly. “You should stay.”

“No, it’s all right, you stay with her,” Hampton argued.

“Hampton, really. You should be the one here.”

“Thank you,” he said, walking to touch Rachael’s hand. “But I have work to do. I need to find out exactly how this happened and make sure it never happens again.” He leaned down and pressed his lips to her pale hand. “I’ll be back in the morning.”

Shayna nodded. He turned back to walk out of the room but met Shayna’s eyes once more. “You’ll take care of her?”

“She’ll be fine.” She smiled, touched by Hampton’s obvious compassion for Rachael. He left the room quietly, leaving Shayna to listen to the buzzing of the machines. She walked to the chair beside the bed, sitting down.

Rachael’s sea green eyes opened sleepily. “You don’t have to stay, you know. I’ll be fine.”

“I know you will.” Shayna rubbed Rachael’s fingers as she’d seen Hampton do. “But I’d like to stay. Since you managed to get out of our sessions, I’ll be needing the company.”

“You don’t like hospitals,” Rachael said intuitively.

“No, I don’t.”

“Have you spent a lot of time in them? With your patients?”

Shayna swallowed. “With my sister.”

“Your sister? The one in the picture?”

Shayna nodded. “Lydia was in a pretty bad skiing accident when she was fourteen. She spent eight months in and out of hospitals. When she was finally released, she began acting odd. There were days when she’d just stay in her bed and refuse to speak to anyone. A few months later, she was diagnosed with DID.”

“Oh, Shayna. That’s why this means so much to you. You research to save her?”

“At first, yes. My sister was perfectly healthy before her accident. They gave her some medicine to ease her symptoms, some days she was Lydia and she’d wake up and take her medicine and be just fine. Then sometimes she’d claim she wasn’t Lydia, she wasn’t sick, and she’d refuse to take her medicine. The personality she’d dissociate into didn’t take care of herself. She wouldn’t eat, she wouldn’t drink. She’d just sleep constantly. We tried every kind of medicine they had, but in the end it wasn’t enough. She passed away when she was seventeen. We watched her die right in front of us and there was nothing we could do. Some part of her just didn’t care enough to keep living.”

“That’s terrible. Please, please don’t stay because of me. I’d feel awful making you stay here.”

Shayna smiled at her. “I don’t like hospitals. They freak me out. But I’d like to stay with you anyway. Maybe some of your bravery has rubbed off on me.”

Rachael’s eyes widened in shock. “You think I’m brave?”

Shayna nodded. “You know in my field of work, I see a lot of things. Some are crazy, some are tragic. It’s very rare that a client comes in and earns my respect like you have. You’ve been so brave and so strong through something I wouldn’t wish on the foulest person I could think of. I’m just so sorry that this is happening to you. It’s heartbreaking to watch.”

“Thank you. Most days I don’t feel strong at all. I just hope Hampton can pull this off. I just want to get back to normal.”

She was quiet for a while, Shayna listened to her breathing. “Will it?”

“Will it what?” Rachael asked.

“Will it go back to normal for you? After all you’ve been through? How will you return?”

“I guess it’ll never go back to how it was before. The four of us. I pray that Caide isn’t guilty of this, but I’ll never forgive him for what he’s done. I don’t know if I’ll be able to stay here, I don’t want to face this town every day. We may just have to create a new normal, somewhere else. Just me and the kids. We don’t get enough snow here, I think. The kids love snow.”

“You’re going to leave La Rue?”

“I think it’d be best.”

“I know one person who’d disagree.” Shayna frowned.

“You?”

“Well, I’d love it if you stayed, but I was thinking of someone else.”

“You can’t mean Argus.” Rachael rolled her eyes.

Shayna smiled, raising her eyebrows.

“Argus is a great lawyer. He’s done more for me than I’ll ever be able to thank him for, but this is just a case to him. Once it’s over, that’ll be it.”

“If you believe that, bravery has done nothing for your intelligence.”

Rachael blushed. “What do you mean?”

“Rachael.”

“What?”

“Alright. We can play that game. All I’m saying is that he cares for you. Don’t forget his feelings before you go disappearing into the Alaskan Wilderness.”

“You really care about him.”

“I care about him because he cares for my client.”

“You really think he cares about me?”

“If I couldn’t figure that out, the diplomas on my walls would be useless.”

“He’s never said anything.”

Shayna pursed her lips. “You’re married, to a jerk by the way, and Hampton’s a nice guy. Plus, he’s your lawyer. No one gets the treatment you get from him, trust me, least of all his clients.”

Rachael blushed again. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Are you married?”

Shayna laughed. “No.”

“Why’s that funny?”

“I don’t have time to date. I stay so completely busy and absorbed in my work. My mom used to say I have a one track mind and it’s always on the same track. I guess I’ve only ever wanted success.”

“That can’t be true. You haven’t ever been in love?”

“Nope. I mean, I’ve dated, I’m just not really into the whole dating scene. It’s overrated. Getting all dressed up, going out, and being uncomfortable? No thank you. I just don’t like leaving my comfort zone and I see no reason to change that.”

“But what do you do for fun? When you aren’t working.”

“I’m always working.”

Rachael stared at her. “You don’t have hobbies? Or friends?”

“Not really, no. I mean, there are a few people who I keep in touch with from school and colleagues I have brunch with occasionally but my hobby is my career. I’m one of those crazy people who actually, genuinely loves her job. I want to learn all I can about every aspect of it. Don’t you feel that passionately about anything?”

Rachael thought for a second. “My kids. I mean, I love dance. I love my job, but my kids are my passion. I want to learn everything about them and spend every second I can with them.”

“You seem like such a good mom.”

“There are days where I don’t know if I’ll make it to the evening but they’re the best things that have ever happened to me.”

Just then the nurse was back, she walked into the room with a ring of keys, jingling them into the air. “You’ve got a good lawyer, Kid.”

Rachael looked confused. The nurse turned to Shayna. “You’re staying with her all night?”

Shayna nodded.

“She’s on your watch then.” She fumbled with the keys, finally pulling one out and unhooking Rachael’s cuffs. She smiled at them both and left. Silence filled the room, Shayna watched as Rachael’s eyes began to flutter and she drifted off to sleep. She watched her sleep soundly, for hours on end. She woke occasionally to ask for a sip of water. Shayna couldn’t make herself sleep in the hospital chair, no matter what position she maneuvered herself into. Instead, she sat quietly as Rachael slept, careful not to make much noise as she aimlessly flipped through the TV channels.

Around 1:00 a.m. Rachael awoke and watched the end of a soap opera with her. “Audrey and I used to spend our summers watching shows like this.”

“It must be really hard for you to question your friendship.”

“She’s my only friend, you know? I hate myself for even believing it. I wish it were any other possibility. Why couldn’t it be the mailman? I have no personal attachments to our mailman.”

Shayna chuckled.

“When I found out about their affair, I should have left. I’m not that girl. The girl who stays while he cheats. If it’d been anyone else, if I’d known about Blaire too, I would’ve left. It’s just that admitting what I knew, leaving Caide, it meant I’d lose Audrey too. I just couldn’t do that. She’s all I have.”

“That’s not true.” Shayna placed her hand on Rachael’s. “Not anymore. You have me, Rachael. You have me and Hampton. Even once all of this is over, you’ll still have us.”

Rachael wiped a tear from her eyes. “To change the subject, this is pretty embarrassing but do you think you could help me to the restroom?”

“Will they let you up?”

“They did before. I should be fine, but I’m still a bit dizzy. As long as you help me get to the door, I’ll be okay.”

Shayna nodded, standing up and pulling back the covers. Rachael’s hospital gown was pulled up to her belly button revealing a large brown spot on her left upper thigh, near her hip. They both blushed, Shayna looking away quickly. Once Rachael had adjusted her gown Shayna asked worriedly. “What happened?”

“Huh?”

“That bruise on your hip. Was that from the attack?”

“Oh, that? No, that’s just a birthmark.” She laughed, throwing her arm around Shayna’s shoulders and hoisting herself out of the bed.

“Oh, it caught me off guard. I was worried you’d been bruised up.” They made their way across the room slowly, Shayna lifting most of Rachael’s weight.