Illegal (7 page)

Even though the afternoon sun scorched the pavement, it seemed like my feet could move faster. With the money from my new job, I could buy new shoes. Leather, instead of cheap plastic.

At the park, we found the stand on the other side of the swimming pool. I hadn't seen it the other night when we were exploring. Children were buying
raspas
and potato chips. How could we have walked for days and missed what was right in front of us?

“Are you Jorge?” I asked the man standing behind the counter.

“Are you the women my wife called about?” asked the man over the giggling of the girls waiting for their Sno-Kones. Mama stood as silent as a rock, so I nodded my head.

“Then I'm Jorge,” he said, jutting out his hand.

Mama shook his hand and I stood tall next to her. I noticed that I was almost taller than she was. It was our third day here. How could I have grown in three days?

The girls went back to the swimming pool. I could see the trails of water dripping from their suits as flies of envy bit my ankles.

“Tomorrow, be here by seven a.m. I'll pay you cash at the end of every day. Six dollars an hour.”

Six dollars seemed like a lot of money, but I wasn't exactly sure how much bread it would buy or rent it would pay.

“Yes, that sounds very good,” I said, “but if you want, we can start working now.” I looked at the graffiti scribbled on the side of the cart. “I could scrub that off if you want.”

His face told me something was wrong. I didn't want to lose the job. “Man, you look just like Tessa.” He gasped.

“We live across the street, so there is not a problem. I don't think it would take me long to clean it,” I said quickly, just in case he was wondering.

He put his hand to his chin. A small tattoo of a cross in between his thumb and first finger peeked out. “Our niece—you resemble our niece. No wonder Manuela was taken with you. Ah, Tessa.” He sighed, looking away while shaking his head.

“This lady, Tessa—” I stammered, about to ask who or what she was. I didn't know what to do with my hands. What was I supposed to say? “I'm sorry about your loss.” That's what Grandma would say whenever someone died in Cedula.

“Oh, she hasn't died, or at least we don't think so. She's just not
with us
anymore.”

He shook his head and the moment was gone. “We do most of our business from the swimming pool. The city gives free lessons to kids in the neighborhood. In the morning and at lunchtime, we sell mostly to workers,” said Jorge. “Don't worry about the graffiti. Just trash talk.”

Mama cleared her throat. “So Nora and I will work here?”

“No. I think you should work with Manuela. I'll keep Nora here with me to sell at the pool.”

I was glad to be near the swimming pool and in the shade. Maybe we would find Papa by working here in the stands. Papa had to eat, right?

Several kids screamed as they jumped off the board and into the crystal blue water. Splashes floated like tiny raindrops into the hot sky. I thought I noticed a green backpack.

Mama knocked me out of my daydream. “Señor Jorge asked you a question. Be polite to the new
jefe
.”

“How old are you?” He looked me directly in the eyes.

It was a good thing I had spent an entire day thinking about this question. I would save my fifteenth year for when we were all together. It was supposed to be a magical time. It was mine to have, and I wouldn't give up my dreams just because things were a bit difficult.

“I'm sixteen,” I said, as if it were the exact truth. Because it was—no more little girl.

Jorge's head was bald on the top, and the sides were filled with gray. His eyes were brown like Papa's. As he leaned down, I could see a cross on a chain hanging around his neck. It had the same red stones as Manuela's ring. “Okay, we're legal.” Like a magician, he slapped his hands together as if he
were showing us a rabbit had disappeared. With a wave of the arm and a few words—poof—we're legal.

“Last question,” said Jorge. “Do you go to
la iglesia
?”

I noticed the crazy man jingling his cart toward the stand.

Mama stammered. I didn't know what to say. What was the answer he wanted? “We haven't found one yet,” I said.

The crazy man parked his cart behind the stand and covered it with a tarp. Jorge didn't even look back, as if this happened every day.

“The church is one block past the Fiesta,” he said, as if part instruction, part suggestion.

“We'll try to go to Mass soon.” I felt like I had to say something with Mama turning into a statue at my side. “We usually just watched it on TV with Grandma.”

“And where is your Grandma?” asked Jorge.

The dirty man disappeared with only a plastic bag.

“In Cedula,” I said, looking Jorge in the eye.

“Mexico? I haven't heard of that town in ages. Such a tiny place.”

It seemed like a tiny place now, compared to
Houston. It was small enough to sit in my head and burn a hole through my heart.

“Home is home,” I said. Grandma used to say that.

We waved good-bye and went back to our apartment, which didn't feel like home at all.

“Maybe we should try to go to Mass tomorrow,” I said. “You know, to light a candle or something?” It's what Grandma would have done if she were nervous.

“Maybe another time.” Mama rubbed her eyes and flopped onto the bed.

In the dark, the noise still crept through the walls. I held my postcard from Papa as I fell asleep. Houston was supposed to be my place of dreams. Papa's words rang in my head:
We will be together
.

Maybe it was a revelation. Maybe God was telling me to reunite my family. It says somewhere in the Bible that when a door closes, a window opens. Not that I had read the Bible, but the nuns told me. Maybe it's not God, but I'm going crazy. It echoed through my thoughts like music from a radio in a distant room.

Suddenly clouds came and thunder and lightning shook everything around me. Mama ran away. Grandma could not be found. Our house and orchard didn't exist anymore. I went through the entire journey of the truck by myself. Then I saw the crazy man and his shopping cart. Behind the cart sat Mama. When I approached, she didn't know who I was anymore. Then the hulking boy who hit the girl began to chase me down the street. I tried to scream but awoke to sweaty sheets and the sound of Mama in the shower.

I carefully wiped away the tears from my eyes and convinced myself everything was okay. Only little girls have nightmares, and I couldn't be one anymore.

 

Besides working in the orchard, I'd never had a real job.

“Mama, do you think we might see Papa today?”

Mama smiled into the mirror as she adjusted her dress. “Yes, let's pray for that today.”

The neighborhood was just waking up and stretching. A few cars clattered by. A man slept in the doorway with garbage bags all around him and a dog tied to his bicycle. It wasn't the crazy man who parked his cart behind Jorge's stand. How many homeless people lived in this neighborhood?

We walked to the park and waited for Jorge as the sun peeked through the leaves in the trees.

“Ladies! How're you doing?” Jorge boomed, shattering the quiet. Birds fluttered from the trees.

He tossed a plastic bag in my direction. “Don't take this the wrong way, but Manuela found a bathing suit. She thought Nora might like to swim during her break in the afternoon.” He held the suit out to my mother. The tags were attached. It was pure yellow, like the sun.

“Nora doesn't know how to swim,” said Mama.

My heart sank. I wanted to be like the other girls. “I could learn,” I said. The idea of making friends while lying next to the pool gave me hope. Mama nodded with a shy smile.

“First go to the truck and get the ice. I'll show your
mama how we get things ready in the morning,” said Jorge.

The shadow of a man appeared from behind a tree and I shrieked.

Jorge looked up with a grin. “Good morning, Mr. Mann.”

The man sneered at me and uncovered his metal cart. Jorge handed Mama a broom and continued as if nothing had happened.

I unpacked supplies and picked up garbage in front of the stand. I heaved several watermelons from the truck and placed them next to the cutting board. Mr. Mann never said a word as he clattered away.

I took the butcher knife and sank it deep into the watermelon's belly. Juice splashed out and coated my T-shirt. It cracked open, and the sweet meat spilled juice onto the counters.

I asked, “They really have swim lessons?”

“Yes.” Jorge laughed at some private joke. “I'm always telling Manuela not to get too attached. I told her it was weird to go off buying a swimsuit for you.”

Manuela arrived and Jorge lumbered out to her truck. She wore a different tank top, but the same
earrings. He tugged at her ponytail. They hugged and kissed like newly married people deeply in love.

Jorge reached in and caressed Manuela's cheek, and I remembered when Papa used to do that to Mama.

Jorge walked ahead of me to the pool and spoke in English to the lifeguard.

The blond girl sitting high up in the chair looked like an angel. Highlights in her hair twinkled like it had a lightbulb glowing through it. I couldn't see her eyes because she wore dark round sunglasses. I didn't see anyone my age except for one lone girl sitting under the trees, her face hidden in a magazine.

“Lifeguard,” Jorge told me. I tried to get the words
to slow down, but I was only catching pieces.
Tacos. Swim
.
Free.

I tugged at Jorge's shirt.
“Jorge. No entiendo.”

“Don't worry about Lauren,” he said. “I have a deal with her that you can sell poolside as long as she gets free drinks.”

The girl with the magazine peeked over the pages at me with curiosity. It was the skinny girl! Her cheek was tinged with a purplish green bruise.

Lauren raised her voice. “I don't speak Spanish. I don't know why they assign me to this pool.”

Jorge huffed at her comments back at the stand. “Nora, your job is to come inside the pool every hour to sell snacks to the customers.”

Jorge gave me a brown bag filled with a
torta
and a slice of watermelon. “Take this to Mr. Mann. He doesn't talk much and he's wary of strangers. Just set it a few paces from him and walk away.”

“Who is he, exactly?” I asked.

“Just a homeless man, but he's still one of God's creatures. I let him park his shopping cart here because he can't take it inside the Salvation Army at night.”

He sat at the corner. I set down the bag next to his plastic container of coins. He didn't make eye contact, and I didn't make conversation. When I
looked over my shoulder, he was already eating his sandwich.

The morning flew by. When I walked past the skinny girl, I noticed the bruises.
“¿Coca-Cola? ¿Galletas?”
I asked.

She examined my face and spoke with a sharp edge. “Lauren gets paid to do her job, and you can just do yours. She's not better than you.”

“¿Qué? No hablo mucho Inglés,”
I said, trying to grasp her words, which overwhelmed me all at once.

“Time to learn,” she said in Spanish. “You have to earn your own way here, and screaming across the park doesn't help no one.”

“
Me llamo
Nora,” I said apologetically. What could I have done?

“Flora,” she said, ending our conversation.

By the time I looked up, it was the afternoon. Jorge tossed me the swimming suit. “Okay, kid. Time for your break.”

He pointed to the locker rooms. “Go to the pool and make some friends. It's good for business. Be back in half an hour.”

The yellow suit stretched across my body like a glove, but I felt shy about walking across the pool deck in something so revealing. Flora was still hun
kered down by the shade trees and rarely ventured into the water. “Is this seat taken?” I asked Flora.

“Yeah,” she said, without looking up.

I knew she was lying. “I've watched you all day; no one is sitting here.”

Her painted eyebrows arched. “Who are you, a detective? Get lost, seat taken.”

I gasped with surprise. My mouth just hung open.

“I'm sorry I couldn't do more,” I said, lifting my feet back and forth. The concrete was getting hot, and I felt confused from her earlier words of advice. Was this her way of getting me back for all of those times I had looked away?

She glanced up at me again. “Jorge is watching. He wouldn't want you hanging out with me.” She flopped her green backpack on the chair and shooed me away. “And what my brother does ain't your fault. Just move on.”

I wandered to the shallow end and sat on the steps. I just wanted to wade into the cool blue water and disappear.

A small black girl with braids came through the gate and walked toward the shallow end. Each braid was fastened with a different colored rubber band. She looked younger than me.

Sitting next to me on the steps, she smiled broadly. “Are you taking lessons too?” Her hair was filled with beautiful plaits. “I'm Keisha. I can't swim real good, neither.”

“Swim?” I said. I practiced the word because I had heard it so often this morning.

Keisha began talking. I didn't want her to get mad at me like everybody else, so I just nodded like I knew what she was saying. How old could she be? Eleven? Twelve?

“Hey, are we gonna start these lessons or what?” Keisha yelled at Lauren.

She pulled her sunglasses down her nose. “You've already flunked four times. Just stay in the shallow end and don't drown.”

Keisha stood on the first step with the water. She splashed water around her legs and rattled on in English.

“Okay,” I said, like I understood every word.
Pretend it's easy until it is.

I liked the way her hair bounced as she talked. Her skin was so black it looked blue. Her suit was purple and little pieces of elastic were sticking out along the edges.

She kept saying the same words. “Swim.” “Pool.”
“Lessons.” She pointed to the other end of the pool a lot, shaking her head. Did that mean we were supposed to stay on this side? I definitely needed to practice my English.

“Okay,” I said again. I wasn't exactly sure what she was saying, but it sounded good enough. Flora watched us with interest, but never moved from her chair.

Keisha stepped in the pool and I dipped my feet in. I couldn't believe she thought I could speak English. It was nice to have a friend, even a young one, as the children in Cedula seemed to disappear with their families.

A chill went up the back of my knees.
“Frío,”
I whispered.

Keisha didn't notice me as she plunged into the water. The water reached up to her chest. It was so clear that I could see her feet touching the bottom.

Fear gripped my stomach. Something wasn't right.

But before I could retreat, I felt a hard shove. “Move it.”

I heard Flora's voice in the background.
“Noooo!”

I fell, face-first, and immediately swallowed water. My feet couldn't find the bottom. Swinging my arms made the water swallow me and everything slowed
down. I felt a hand yanking on the straps of my suit. I was lifted up and water poured out of my mouth and nose. Keisha's hands pulled me to the side of the pool.

Lauren didn't move from her chair. She just sat there twirling her hair as two girls walked away cackling. They each had a red star on their shoulders.

My heart pounded. Why had I been pushed? At least Keisha saved me.

“Are you okay?” Keisha asked me. “Do you even know what I'm saying?” She said it louder, like I was deaf.

“She doesn't speak English, dummy,” Flora said to Keisha.

My legs shook from so much pretending and nearly drowning. How could I learn quickly without being killed in the process?

“You don't speak English?” asked Keisha. “How come you kept nodding earlier like you understood everything?”

“Okay,” I answered hoping the word fit into the conversation. Tears burned at my eyes and made my nose feel stuffy.

Keisha nodded as Flora strolled back toward the deep end. “I don't talk to Flora anyways. Her brother is a big gang-banger and those mean girls are also in
a gang. I don't know why Flora is always at the pool but never talking to nobody.”

How could this day get any worse? Nearly drowning, not being able to speak English, and even worse, almost crying in front of strangers.

But still, I wasn't going to let random girls bully me.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Grandma would tell me to
try again
.

“Okay,” I said again. “Swim.” I slid off the side of the pool and into the water, but my hands remained glued to the edge. Keisha smiled as her rainbow braids floated in the water behind her like piñata streamers. Flora watched us carefully. As long as I could see both of them, things at the pool would be okay.