Illusions of Love (62 page)

‘No, Dominic.
 
No.
 
I’m not going to marry you.’

The mood had just changed in an instant and Dominic felt his stomach sink, a feeling he’d never thought possible – a feeling that washed over him like a blanket of sadness.
 
A feeling he’d never, ever felt before.

‘I… Look, I’m… I love you,
India
…’

‘I know you do.’
 
She finally turned to look at him, her fingers squeezing his hand.
 
‘And I think I love you too, okay?
 
But, I can’t marry you.
 
I can’t do that.’

He looked down at their joined hands, stroking her fingers gently as they clung onto his.
 
‘Is there a reason for that?’

‘There are a hundred reasons, Dominic.
 
Jesus, I’ve only just come through my third divorce for one.
 
And we’ve only just met, remember?
 
We don’t even know each other all that well in reality, do we?
 
Not really… Look, I just need some breathing space, can you understand that?
 
I don’t want to go jumping straight into another marriage so soon… I don’t even know if I ever want to get married again…’

‘Especially to a man who’s turned out to be the son of the man you
really
love.’

She narrowed her eyes, letting go of his hand.
 
‘What the hell’s
that
supposed to mean?’

‘Oh, come on,
India
.
 
Everybody knows that the only man you’ve ever really loved is Michael Walsh.
 
And I don’t think I’m ever really going to be able to get past daddy, am I?’

‘Okay.’
 
She held her hands up, walking away from him, out into the hall, running down the stairs.
 
‘I don’t need this.’

Dominic ran after her, determined not to let this one go.
 
Maybe he shouldn’t have said what he had but he’d been thinking aloud, voicing thoughts that had been playing on his mind ever since he’d laid eyes on this woman.

‘I’m sorry, alright?
 
India
…’

‘No, it’s not alright, Dominic.’
 
She turned around, part of her wanting to run to him and let him hold her tight because she wanted to be with him, she really did.
 
But what he’d said about Michael – was that even just the tiniest bit true?
 
Had he hit a nerve?
 
She didn’t know, and she didn’t really want to think about it.
 
What she
wanted
was a cup of very strong coffee.
 
And Kenny.
 
She needed to talk to Kenny.
 
‘It’s not alright.’

‘
India
!
 
Jesus, how the hell did we get from me asking you to marry me to you walking away from me?
 
Huh?
 
Come on, baby.
 
Let’s talk about this.’

But she’d already flung open the front door, her attention suddenly distracted by what looked like a lot of activity going on over at Michael’s villa.

‘
India
?’
 
Dominic’s voice made her turn around briefly to look at him, but she didn’t really care what he wanted anymore.
 
Something was going on over at Michael’s.
 
Something that seemed to be shrouded in an element of the usual movie-star secrecy she’d been so used to witnessing during her years in Hollywood, and when that element of secrecy was exercised, then it usually meant that something serious was going down.

‘Something’s going on over there,’ she said, grabbing Dominic’s hand and pulling him outside.

He looked over towards the villa opposite as a large blacked-out van pulled right up to the doorway, blocking their view, but all that did was make
India
’s stomach jolt with a feeling of dread.
 
This wasn’t right.
 
It didn’t feel right, it didn’t look right, and
India
just knew that something was wrong.
 
Something was very wrong.

She could hear voices; a female voice, a voice full of panic, a voice that told her that person was near-on hysterical and although she couldn’t really see anything, she knew it was Layla.
 
Of course it was Layla, who else would it be?

‘What the hell…’ Dominic said, gripping
India
’s hand tighter.

But
India
was rooted to the spot, she couldn’t move.
 
Something was wrong alright, and it was more than obvious now that whatever had happened concerned Michael, and whilst that in itself was enough to make her feel a dread she’d never experienced before, something else had just made the whole situation even more confusing.

‘That’s my dad,’ she whispered, her eyes not leaving the figure she’d just seen outside on the lawn.
 
And all of a sudden, as she remembered everything she’d told Martha back in
L.A.
, she realised something she should have realised the second she’d told her step-mum everything – she could never keep a secret like that from Reece.
 
And
India
should never have expected her too.
 
But just what the hell had her father done?

CHAPTER 36

‘He’s had a heart attack,’
India
said, looking up as Kenny sat down next to her in the hospital corridor.

‘Jesus!
 
How… how bad?’

India
stared straight ahead of her, clasping her hands together in her lap.
 
‘He’s okay… now.
 
He’s okay now, but…’

She wanted to cry – she needed that release, she really did – but no tears seemed willing to fall, and instead all she felt was a crashing numbness and a feeling of emptiness that swept over her in constant waves.

‘Shit!
 
How… What the fuck happened?’
 
Kenny tried to put everything that had gone on that morning with him and Charley to the back of his mind, because all he wanted to do right now was be there for his best friend when she needed him.
 
And she needed him right now, more than ever.
 
He’d been by this woman’s side for almost twenty years and knowing what he did, knowing her past and the way she’d always felt about Michael Walsh, despite all the crap he’d kicked in her face, Kenny knew this wasn’t going to be easy for her.

‘Reece,’
India
whispered, still staring straight ahead of her.

‘Reece?’
 
Kenny frowned.
 
‘I don’t understand.
 
What do you mean?’

India
turned to look at him.
 
‘I told Martha.
 
I told her about Michael – about what he did to me...’

‘And she’s told Reece.’
 
It wasn’t a question.

India
nodded slowly, turning to look up the empty corridor.
 
‘I don’t know why I’m surprised, I mean, my dad… he only did what any father would probably have done if they’d found out their daughter had been…’
 
She trailed off, unable to finish the sentence, her voice verging on emotionless.

Kenny reached out to take her hand, squeezing it tight.
 
‘Are you saying that’s what caused it?
 
The heart attack?
 
That your dad confronting Michael caused this?’

She looked at him, shrugging.
 
‘Well, I can’t imagine it helped, Kenny.
 
I mean, Michael’s almost sixty-years-old, isn’t he?
 
And he thrives on stress, puts himself under so much pressure on an almost constant daily basis…’

‘Most of that’s self-inflicted, kiddo.’

‘Yeah.
 
I know that.’
 
She sighed heavily as she threw her head back, staring at the stark white ceiling above her.
 
She hated hospitals.
 
All they brought back were unhappy memories of times she didn’t really want to think about anymore.
 
‘I’m sorry, Kenny.
 
I didn’t mean to be so defensive, I’m just worried.
 
He’s Ethan’s dad, after all.
 
And Ethan loves him so much; he’d be devastated if anything happened to him.’

‘And what about you?’

She looked at him.
 
‘What
about
me?’

‘How would
you
feel if anything happened to him?’

India
turned away again, and that in itself told Kenny everything he needed to know.

‘Have you seen him yet?’ Kenny asked, still holding onto her hand.

She shook her head.
 
‘No.
 
Layla’s with him.’

Kenny looked around.
 
‘Where’s Dominic?’

‘Well, he isn’t playing the dutiful son, that’s for sure.’

Kenny was a little surprised at the tone of her voice when talking about a man she professed to be crazy about.
 
‘Is that what you think he
should
be doing?’

‘Can you quit with the psychoanalysing shit, Kenny.
 
No, I don’t think it’s what he
should
be doing, I just… Jesus, I don’t know.
 
I don’t know anything anymore.’

‘Trouble in paradise, huh?’

She looked at him again but said nothing, her attention suddenly diverted towards Reece who was walking towards them, his head down, his hands in his pockets.
 
India
stood up and waited for him to approach them, her heart beating ten to the dozen, her head not entirely straight but she was feeling way too emotional to even begin thinking about what she was going to say before she said it.
 
She didn’t really care anymore.

‘What have you done?’ she whispered, waiting until her father’s eyes met hers before she spoke, her voice quiet but steady.

‘I did what any father would do,
India
.
 
You think I’m just going to forget about something like that, huh?
 
Forget what he did; forget all the shit he put you through…’

‘So, killing him is the way to go then?’

‘Don’t exaggerate things…’

‘He had a fucking heart attack, Dad!
 
You do
know
that, don’t you?’

‘Yes,
India
.
 
I was there, remember?’

‘Yeah.
 
You were there.’

‘This wasn’t my fault,
India
…’

‘Y’know, I kept that information from you – what happened between me and Michael – I kept it from you because you didn’t need to know, you didn’t need to know any of it because we worked it out, Michael and I.
 
We came through it…’

‘Jesus, come on,
India
!
 
Do you really expect me to believe all that crap?
 
You came
through
it?
 
You honestly think that’s happened?
 
You shutting him out of your life for all those years, then when he suddenly reappears you can’t keep away from him, you can’t even hold down a fucking relationship with any other man because you can’t get Michael fucking Walsh out of your fucking head… Don’t stand there and tell me you came through it because you aren’t even close, sweetheart.
 
So don’t fucking kid yourself.’

‘I’m over him, Dad.’

‘Yeah, okay,’ Reece laughed.
 
‘You’re over him.
 
You don’t want him anymore, is that right?’

She looked at her famous father through narrowed eyes.
 
‘I’m over him.’

‘Okay.
 
Do one thing for me, alright?
 
Just answer this one question.
 
If Dominic MacDonald wasn’t his long-lost son, would you have grown so close to him so quickly?’

‘What the hell are you talking about?’

‘You can’t have Michael anymore… Okay, maybe that’s not the case, because I think all of us know that you’ve only got to say the word and that man would come running, so, how can I put this?’
 
He looked straight at
India
.
 
‘You
won’t
go back to Michael, am I right on that score?’

India
nodded slowly, confused as hell now.

‘So, what’s the closest thing you can have to Michael without actually having to take him back?’
 
Reece stared straight into
India
’s eyes as he spoke.
 
‘His son,
India
.
 
You can sure as hell have his son.’