Imperfect Love (28 page)

GUS GAVE HER THE NEWS SHE HAD already seen on his face. She was going to be a mother. And then, much to her shock, he asked her what she wanted to do.

“What do you mean?”

“Holly, Jake doesn’t—”

“I know!” she ground out, cutting him off. “He doesn’t need this right now.”

Gus frowned. “That isn’t quite what I was going to say. I meant, he doesn’t need to know.”

She looked at Gus like he’d grown another head. How could he even suggest what he was suggesting? Holly could never do that, not in a million years. His own daughter wasn’t able to have a child, and now he was proposing that she abort his first grandchild.

“I’m sorry, I truly am, but I can’t do that. Correction, I won’t do that.”

“Holly, you may not realize the risks of trying to carry this pregnancy. Your blood pressure is much too high. I’m going to get right to the point. You are sitting on a rare case of gestational hypertension, which may be a precursor to an early preeclampsia onset. The earlier this happens, the higher the risk to you and the baby. You could have permanent organ damage from the pressure, and some mothers die.

Holly’s heart dipped into her stomach.

“The only solution is to deliver the baby and,” he took a deep breath, “maybe you’ll be luckier on the next try.”

“That’s it? Try again, like it’s a game? How is there no treatment?”

“Well, I promise I’m working on it, but I haven’t proven anything, yet.”

Holly was in no mood for some speculative research.

“Why can’t you give me blood pressure medication like old people take?” Holly asked.

Gus nodded like he’d contemplated that course of action before. “The fear is that if we reduce your blood pressure, the fetus won’t get enough blood from the placenta. It’s you or the baby, basically.”

“So, on the whole, you’re telling me that I can die from carrying this baby?”

“You could. But lucky for you, I’m one of the best in the world, and I might just have something that could work.” Gus tried his best to help Holly relax, if not smile with his words.

However, she was too caught up in the news and simply nodded while trying to suck up her tears.

“I need to speak to Jake, too. I’ll ask Bernie to come and sit with you, all right?”

She nodded and tried to return Gus’ smile, but for some reason she had nothing to be happy about. She wiped at a stray tear as he exited.

How can this be happening?
She was on the pill, and one he’d recommended in the first place. He’d said it was safe, and now there she sat with a bun in the oven. It was something both her grandmother and mother used to say. It was a cute saying, except this particular bun was already making an effort to kill her.
Mara is going to be pissed!

“Hey,” Bernie’s voice filled the room. “Are you okay?”

Holly shook her head, then promptly began to cry.

Bernie rushed over, folding her arms around Holly. “Shhh, whatever it is, it’s going to be fine, Holls. I promise.”

Holly shook her head again.

“Holly, speak to me. I think I know because Jake’s dad’s here, but I have to hear it from you. Are you…”

Holly nodded.

Bernie gasped. “You’re pregnant?” she asked softly, grinning.

“It’s not like that. I could die, Berns. What happened tonight is just the beginning. I have some sort of the beginning stages of pree-something.”

“Preeclampsia?” Bernie queried.

“Yes, that. He said that at this early stage, it’s called gestational hypertension. Dangerously high blood pressure caused by the pregnancy.”

“Holly, most women only contract it from about around 32 weeks into their pregnancy, they don’t get it this early.”

“He said that too, but that it’s more dangerous since it’s this early. At least it explains why I feel so shitty.

Bernie rested her hand on the bed while staring at Holly with a concerned look.

“Does he have a plan?”

“I don’t know.”

Silence filled the room for a few seconds. “Well, he is known to be one of the best gynecologists in the world. I’m sure he’ll figure it out,” Bernie stated confidently.

“So, you’re saying that my boyfriend’s father is going to be my vagina’s doctor?”

Bernie laughed, and shaking her head said, “No. He can’t. Because the baby’s daddy is his son, which makes him the grandpa and pappies are too close. He’ll assign you another doctor.”

“I just don’t want to feel this horrible.”

Bernie stroked Holly’s cheek softly. The last time she’d done that was when she was saying goodbye to Holly’s twin, Jamie.

“It’s going to be okay, Holls. You’ll see. The Peters’ are a bunch of kick-ass doctors. They’ve won awards; that kind of crap. Gus won’t let anything happen to you.” She gave Holly a sweet smile, but tears glistened in Bernie’s eyes all the same.

Her friend was worried to death, that much Holly could tell.

Just then, Jake appeared from behind the curtain. He looked worried, too, when he sat next to her on the bed. He gently placed a hand on Holly’s stomach and bent forward from the waist down to give her an awkward hug. “It’s going to be okay. You’ll be fine, you hear me?” He looked at her.

“I take it your father told you?”

“He did.”

“How is this even remotely possible, Jake? They said 99 percent effective.”

“I guess you are that special one percent,” he joked.

“This is not funny.” She sighed and covered her eyes with the back of one hand. “We can’t be parents now, Jake. You have your internship and I—”

“Stop that. You think I’ll leave you? Believe me, I won’t. Not with Amelia as my sister. But I wouldn’t do that to you, in any case. If you ask me, Amelia would practically take over and raise the child herself if she could. She will help out, Holls, it’s going to be fine. I don’t want you to stress about anything, okay.”

Holly finally laughed.

“I’m here too, Holly. And you know I will never leave you. You’re stuck with me forever,” Bernie said softly.

Holly grabbed Bernie’s hand, squeezed it gently, smiled and finally sighed. She looked at Jake again. “Your mom is not going to like this.”

“Was it my mom who told you to go on the pill?”

Fuck! Lie.

“No, Jake, but I’m positive that she isn’t going to be as accepting as your father.”

He smiled. “I don’t care if my mother is going to like or not. I’m so ready for this. I want this child, as much as I want its mother. So don’t worry about mine. I’ll take care of her. Your job is to stop stressing, relax and enjoy your pregnancy. That is an order.” Jake gave her a lopsided smile.

“How on earth am I going to enjoy it, if I continue to feel like this?”

Jake raised an eyebrow. “Really, you stubborn woman. You don’t think we have a plan to make you feel better?”

“I didn’t say that,” she huffed, and then as if his words had just sunk in, she asked, “You do?”

Jake smiled. “We are the fucking Peters’, so of course we do.”

“See,” Bernie said, all-knowing. “Told you so.”

All three chuckled at that.

“Jake.” Gus walked in with a different type of medicine in his arms. “There are forms you two will have to sign as this is purely a trial basis.”

“Dad, we’re not going to sue you.”

“It’s not that. We have to show the trial’s paperwork to the government if we want to release it to the public in the future. Holly is the type of woman I’ve been waiting for, to be honest.”

“Fine, give it to me.” Jake held his hand out for the clipboard.

Holly could hear the pen scribble on the pad.

“Holly needs to sign it as well.”

“Could you explain it to her first? Like you did with me out in the hall?”

“Sure.”

Bernie got up to leave. “I’m just outside, okay?”

Holly smiled and nodded as Gus took the chair Bernie had occupied seconds ago and re-positioned it closer to her bed.

Jake sat next to Holly on the bed, stroking her back softly.

He smiled, looking down at the tin of formula with a huge p47 on the label, and a picture of a pregnant woman smiling. “It’s a product specifically designed for pregnant women who struggle with high blood pressure and all sorts of illnesses during their pregnancy; specifically for gestational hypertension and preeclampsia symptoms. If immediately treated, we think it might help in reducing many of these symptoms, which in turn might even allow you to have a normal pregnancy without paying the hospital too many visits,” Gus explained.

He went on to tell her about the amount of vitamin properties the shake provided, and how good it was for the fetus. He further added that it would also help the fetus grow as it should, following that up with another list of pros.

From what Holly could tell, there were no side effects, yet. She would be the first person to try this wonder drug; in essence she’d be a guinea pig. However, she didn’t mind in the least. Especially if it would keep her from feeling so horrible.

While Jake held the clipboard for her, she picked up the pen and signed.

“I’ll need to keep her overnight—the first twenty-four hours are critical. The medication should start having an effect by tomorrow night.”

Stay overnight!
Holly didn’t say it out loud, of course, but she was none too happy. The last time she’d stayed over was when Jamie was constantly in and out of hospital.

The staff at Downsend, a couple of miles away from P&E had organized a makeshift bed for Holly, placing it right next to her sister during her last days. It had been an extremely difficult time, and one of the reasons Holly didn’t like hospitals. It brought back all those memories of her twin.

“I’m sorry, Bee Puke. If my dad says overnight, it’s overnight.”

“You said it was just going to be a checkup.” Holly’s lower lip trembled.

“That was when it was only you we were worried about. But it’s not only you, anymore. There is a little bean inside of you, so, I have a different say in all of this.”

Holly chuckled tiredly, loving the name he’d come up with. Jake sure seemed very excited about it all, but she couldn’t shake the horrible feeling that his mother would never let her forget this episode.

Bernie stayed with her and even accompanied her when she was admitted to the maternity ward. Holly seriously hated hospitals, but she’d always liked the maternity ward. It was the only section of a hospital she loved. It meant life, not sickness or death.

Jake walked into her room at around nine, followed by an ultrasound machine. He was grinning from ear to ear, and she wished that she felt the same way as him.

His father, accompanied by a nurse, walked into the room a couple of minutes later just as Jake was about to turn the machine on.

“Let me do it, before you break the thing,” the nurse said, ushering him out of the way.

He moved to the other side of Holly’s bed to stand next to Bernie, who shared Jake’s excitement.

His father gently lifted up the hospital gown she had been admitted in. She hated those stupid gowns and wished she had her pajamas. He squirted lukewarm gel on to her lower abdomen—which at that point in time didn’t even resemble a woman who could be pregnant—before he gently moved a device over her midriff.

There was nothing at first, and then he stopped when he found what he was looking for. He clicked another button on the machine and the heartbeat, sounding like it was beating a thousand times per minute, filled the room.

Holly’s eyes grew.

“Don’t worry,” Bernie assured. “It’s normal for it to be fast.”

Jake didn’t say a thing. He just stared at the sonar like a ten-year-old boy who was watching his favorite cartoon.

Gus was mesmerized, too, as he gently moved the device to see another angle.

Tears welled up in Gus’ eyes.

“You are such cry-babies,” the nurse announced.