Impulse (52 page)

I shuffled to the fridge and reached for the handle. “Are you hungry?” I asked. “Disregard. I keep forgetting you only eat sugar.” I tugged the handle and a sharp slice of light stung my eyes. I slammed the door so hard that something inside tipped over and rolled around.

“You’ll live,” he mumbled.

“Thanks for the warning.”

Christian twirled the walnut on the counter. “I was testing to see if you were thinking about your actions. You should always consider the consequences of everything you do. I can’t hold your hand, lass. You won’t always have a guard. It’s more than common sense. You need to develop your ability to assess every situation, read someone’s facial tics and gestures, listen for hesitation and lies in their words. You’re too trusting, too… casual. I blame it on being a human.”

“You were a human once; don’t be so quick to spit on them.”

“Aye, to be human,” he grumbled. “I once knew what hunger was. Not the kind when you go a day without a bag of chips, but real hunger that gnaws on you like an invisible animal. Life doesn’t get any easier simply because you’re an immortal. Weigh the consequences and make a sacrifice. You could have settled for food out of the cabinet or shut your eyes and blindly reached in.”

“Ah, lectures on how to forage for food coming from a man who hasn’t boiled potatoes since the turn of the century.”

“Let me have a look at them.” Christian hopped off the counter and examined my eyes closely, pulling the lids up.

“Hmm, they look smaller and I see a ring of green around the edges. How did you end up with an eye color like that?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. “Your mom’s eyes are brown and I’ve never seen a color
that
vivid.”

“They used to be brown.”

“I don’t believe I know your story.”

“I’m sure the day you were made a Vampire was something you’ll always remember—a ceremony, parade, maybe you even got a bouquet of flowers and a crown. But the day of my first spark haunts me.”

“You need to eat something,” he said, changing the topic.

“Logan fed me, so I’m good.”

He folded his arms. “What did the Relic say about your… eye thing?”

“She has to do more tests,” I said with a shrug. “I’ve never been normal, so I guess I’ve just learned to stop dwelling on it.”

I glanced down at my hand and remembered the mood ring was still on the bedside table. I liked wearing it even though it never changed colors anymore and was always black. Maybe it was broken or I’d lost all my passion.

“How long did you guard Justus for?”

“Five years,” he replied, pouring cold juice into a tall glass. “Don’t think you’re the only one who’s all trouble. That man kept me on my toes.”

“I bet.” I chuckled as he set the glass beside me. “Why did he need a guard?”

“HALO. He was new and it was a dangerous time. The Mageri ordered a guard on every member after someone butchered the founders. You two have a lot in common,” he said, slipping an enigmatic glance over his shoulder. “Stubborn. Me and him were in a good deal of knife fights and—”

“And what?

He shook his head. “Nothing. Here, eat this.”

I took a few bites of a banana. “And what?”

Something flashed in his eyes as he leaned against the counter on his elbow. “Don’t tell him I spoke of this. There was a woman he was smitten with. She was different. In fact, he never spoke to her or got within thirty yards. He intentionally kept his distance.”

“Why?”

Christian shrugged. “Many nights he went to her home and waited to catch a glimpse of her in the window. It was a strange thing to see, almost as if he was guarding her. There were nights she walked unattended and he kept in the shadows, following her until she was safely inside.”

“Was she a Mage?”

“Yes. He knew her by association. She was the sister, so to speak, of one of the other HALO members, as far as them having the same Creator. Justus kept his affections a secret, especially from his HALO brother. I don’t understand why he never spoke to her; he could have had her if he wanted to, with his charm.”

“Because it would have been false,” I murmured. “I would rather love someone who hates me than love someone whose feelings are a lie.”

Christian considered that and brushed his hand through his disheveled brown hair. “Long story short, she was killed.”

My jaw slackened. “By who?”

“Many didn’t—and still don’t—approve of the alliance between races. It’s why the members never assemble in one place all at once. Anyhow,” he said, pacing to the center of the room, “one of the HALO brothers was brutally slain alongside his sister—the woman that Justus had admired from afar. No one knows who the culprit was or what transpired in that room. It ruined Justus and it became a private hell since he couldn’t mourn for her openly. I knew of his secret infatuation because I watched him day and night, shadowing closely as he continually put himself in harm’s way to keep watch over this woman. It was
many
years ago.”

I tossed the half-eaten banana in the sink. The womanizer I’d come to know had once loved—in his own way. I thought about the things I’d said to him regarding women. How can you know that an offhand comment could pierce another’s heart if they don’t open that heart to you and share their pain?

“Don’t mention this to him, Silver.
Ever
.” His mouth formed a grim line. “It is his own personal pain to suffer, and yes, he still suffers. I know him well enough that I see the vacant gaze in his eyes when he’s near other women. The painting in the dining room out there—that’s her,” he said, jerking his thumb. “When he brought that thing over here, I knew he was still carrying the fecking torch.”

“
What?
” All the blood drained from my face.

The painting mounted on the wall behind his chair—the one I’d stared at for a year while we ate our meals—was the woman he loved? The soft colors portrayed a beautiful woman in the water, reaching for a man. She touched the blue water with one hand and he held the sun with his other, but their hands never joined. The image of the man was from behind, but it could have very well been him.

“Justus painted that,” he said solemnly.

I shook my head in disbelief.

Christian smirked and lifted his black eyes to mine. “You didn’t know? Your Ghuardian used to be a painter; he was exceptionally good at it. He stopped after her death—destroyed everything he hadn’t sold or given away, except that one. I’m certain when he went back to the house it was for that painting. The scoundrels assumed the cars meant more to him.”

This revelation lay out before me like tapestry, weaving together the elements of his life that made him who he was. Hard. Cold. Distant.

“Not everyone’s story has a happy beginning or ending,” he said matter-of-factly.

“His story isn’t over, Christian.”

With his elbows on the cabinet, he rubbed his nose against his shoulder and stared at his black pants. “It’s better not to fall in love. It never ends well and someone gets hurt. That’s why it’s called
falling
.”

“Aren’t you a ray of sunshine?” I slid off the counter and folded my arms. He sounded a lot like me and that was something I needed to change.

“And do you think you will fare any better?”

“Why don’t you just stick to your job and leave out all the pearls of wisdom?”

“You
do
know that interbreeding is not highly looked upon,” he pointed out. “Have you experienced the racism yet?”

I bit my lip. “Yes. We were on a date and someone approached our table.”

“Sounds like a minor infraction. It gets worse. They spit on you, curse you behind your back, and call you a whore. They’ll instigate fights with Logan, and some places will deny you entrance if they suspect you’re a couple. That is a reality of our world and you should prepare yourself for it. Regardless of what DNA you may have, you are Mage first and foremost. I don’t understand why you would take such risks with someone who is not a Mage; you only put yourself in further danger.”

“Am I making you work for your money?”

Christian followed me into the hallway. I hadn’t noticed before, but his position was calculated—in front of entrances or exits.

“My job isn’t to judge you, Silver. But this puts you in a more perilous position—you’ll make more enemies. I’ve never heard of a Mage and Chitah outside of a tumble in the bedroom and even then, not many. Most would never brag about sleeping with the enemy.” His black eyes swallowed me up.

“I didn’t plan on this, and I don’t need to justify it to anyone. You don’t date outside your Breed?”

Christian licked his lips and tucked his hands in his pockets. “No, I do not
date
outside my Breed. I won’t turn away a good fuck from anyone, but it doesn’t go beyond that. Vampire females are exquisite and incomparable. Not to mention hard to fucking come by,” he mumbled.

“Why aren’t you married?”

A burst of laughter escaped and he bent to his knees. His head suddenly snapped up with a menacing change in his expression. Without a word, Christian walked in hurried steps toward the front door.

“What’s the matter?”

“Stay here and grab that.” He pointed to the cell phone on the table. “Justus hasn’t set up my security clearance, so I’ll need you to get me back inside. We have a visitor.”

“I’ll go too,” I said.

“No! You stay here.”

Had Justus installed silent alarms? Christian left the house to go topside and I put on a pair of sweats as Max darted into one of the guest rooms. Several agonizing minutes ticked by and I sent a text to Justus to let him know something was wrong. What if Christian was hurt and needed my help? I walked through the secured doors until I reached the elevator that took me up to the garage.

It was late evening. A vibrant moon lit up the landscape, and a cold snap of air trickled into the garage, making me thankful for the socks.

I didn’t sense the presence of a Mage as I stepped onto the driveway—although anyone could be concealing. A small animal scurried across the forest and I blew out a breath of air.

A cold hand slapped over my mouth. Christian’s face burned with anger as he pushed me against the outer wall. “I told you to stay inside.”

My pulse fluctuated and a hot wave of energy spiked in the tips of my fingers.

“We have company,” he said to himself, looking over his shoulder.

Stretching my fingers, I moved his hand away from my mouth. “It’s a Mage. I felt their light a second ago, so I don’t think they’re trying very hard to conceal.”

”Go back inside,” he hissed.

Under normal circumstances, I could have used my abilities to flash out of reach and fight, but my body was in no condition after what I’d been through over the past few days. What I needed was a stunner.

I had sidestepped toward the garage entrance when a burst of movement tore across the driveway.

Merc looked ready to inflict pain. His blond hair was stringy, thin, and the mist attacked it like a virus. More than moonlight danced in his eyes and I knew that he was charged with light.

“I thought you were in custody,” I yelled out.

Merc flashed to the right and lunged forward. Christian knocked him away and Merc grinned like a demon, wiping the blood from his chin. He was faster and they both knew it. Christian pinned me against the wall with his back, locking his elbows on both sides and pressing against me like an immovable shield.

Twigs snapped beneath Merc’s feet.

“Let me go,” I said, pushing Christian’s back. “He’s going to stake you!”

Merc held a sturdy branch in his grip and studied the end.

“I’m serious, Christian. If he takes you out, what am I supposed to do?”

Merc spun the stick in his hand like a baton twirler marching in a parade.

Clearing my throat, I hoped to distract him. “Merc, what do you want from us?”

His expression tightened. Christian wasn’t his target and he continued to roll the stick effortlessly between his brutal fingers. The air charged with Mage energy as if there were already a battle between us. Merc looked more like a man who’d done hard time than someone who belonged in politics.

“Learner, after I extract all that delicious power from your bones, I’m going to stomp on your skull until you’re nothing but a corpse at my feet. Maybe I should cut off your head and mount it on one of his cars.” He laughed maliciously. “I think Justus would like that, don’t you?”

“Why did you come here?” I demanded to know.

Merc spit on the ground and scuffed up some dirt with his shoes as he stood on the edge of the driveway. “Someone like you doesn’t deserve to live. You’re nothing but a hybrid, a mutation that should’ve been killed at inception. You,” he said, pointing the stick, “ruined my standing with the Council. I had plans. Doesn’t matter.” He shook his head slowly. “Things are set in motion. You’ll never be a true Mage. You’re an abomination that should be wiped from the face of the earth.”

“And
you
are a traitor,” I accused.

“Not everyone believes in the holy light of the Mageri. We are superior beings and it’s time we quit hiding in the shadows of humanity. If we can’t change them or kill them, then they’ll be slaves to us and know how great our power is.”