In My Father's Shadow (30 page)

“I was with Richie,” Mark added. “We both just wanted
to take some time off for awhile and kick back – maybe take our
families away somewhere for a real vacation. We’re all not sure if
we’re ready to retire but we were thinking maybe if we take this
time off, we can think about it – make a better decision.”

“Jay knows how badly he screwed up back then,” Nate
added. “He doesn’t need reminders. And when he came to us about
Rhys’s offer, Jay wanted us all to work with him. He wasn’t
abandoning us – he didn’t want to take the job and leave us out in
the cold. He even said that if he did work for Rhys, he’d still
work with us. And you kids should understand how much work that
would be – how much extra work it would be for Jay.”

“We’re very sorry,” RJ muttered, his head bowed in
guilt.

“You don’t owe us the apology,” Richie stated.

“I know,” RJ said, nodding at Jamie and Cole. “We’ll
go over there now and talk to Jay.”

“No you won’t,” Callie ordered. “They’re having
dinner together. And obviously Ally doesn’t want to see you. Let
them be.”

RJ nodded and plopped back down. He looked at
Stephanie who’d remained silent the whole time. “What about you and
Ally?” he asked. “I mean, she punched you.”

Stacy gasped. “Ally punched you?”

Stephanie nodded and started to cry. “But I deserved
it.” She sniffed and looked at Cole. “I didn’t tell you everything
because I was so angry at her and at myself.”

What happened?” Cole demanded, eyes growing dark.

“I went to her room to invite her over - I was just
trying to get the four of you together so you’d talk again but I
ended up arguing with her.” She bit her lip. “I told her that maybe
my dad was worthless but at least he wasn’t…a washed up coke head
who abandons his friends.”

“You said that?” Cole asked angrily, jumping to his
feet.

“Stephanie!” Stacy shouted, raking her nails over her
cheeks. “How could you?”

Nate massaged his temples tiredly. He looked at his
fellow band mates. “This is a big mess.”

All they could do is nod and agree.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Ally walked to the Student Center alone. She’d
arrived back at school a few hours ago to find her supply of diet
soda depleted so she decided to visit the vending machines to grab
a few. She wasn’t in the mood to leave campus and run into
town.

She was more relieved than she cared to admit about
the situation with her dad. Yes, she’d been a bit worried that
maybe there had been some truth in what the guys had told her, but
she’d always had a hard time believing bad things about her father.
He’d always bent over backwards to do right by his family – maybe
because of how badly he’d screwed up in the past. And she loved him
dearly for it.

“Hey, Jones,” someone yelled behind her.

She groaned as she turned around. “What do you want,
Jennifer? Looking to break my arm now?”

“No,” Jennifer snorted. “Tell your little friends to
stay away from me.”

“What are you talking about?” Ally asked, thrown
slightly off guard.

“I saw all your little boyfriends at a party a few
weeks ago and they all threatened me to stay away from you.”

Ally’s surprise showed on her face. They’d defended
her? She shook her head. “Well, you didn’t listen because look at
you now!”

Jennifer smirked and took a step closer. “What’s this
I hear about your dad’s band breaking up?”

Ally tensed. “They didn’t split up. They’re just
taking a rest.”

Jennifer laughed bitterly. “Yeah, right. What’s the
problem? Your dad get hooked on coke again?”

She was jerked off her feet just as she launched a
fist at Jennifer’s face. “Let go of me,” she screamed at whoever
had both her arms behind her back.

“You do it, princess, and you’ll be suspended,” Cole
whispered in her ear.

“I don’t care,” she said, struggling to get out of
his grip.

“You can kiss the State Team good-bye,” he reminded
her.

She looked up at Jennifer, but RJ stood between the
two of them, blocking her view of the other girl. “I won’t hit
her,” Ally seethed.

“Sure, cuz,” Jamie said. RJ shifted to the left and
Ally could make out Jamie’s frame keeping Jennifer’s from trying to
attack Ally while Cole held her back.

“I think you’d better leave,” RJ suggested. Jennifer
cast them all a dirty look before turning on her heel and walking
away.

“You can let me go now,” Ally said through clenched
teeth. Anger mixed with a bit of excitement and shot through her
veins at Cole’s touch.

“No way, Al,” he said, sounding slightly amused.

“Wait until she’s far enough away that you can’t
catch her if you run,” RJ told her with a smirk. Ally glared at
him. He held his hands up. “Easy, tiger! I come in peace.” ”

Cole loosened his grip so she pulled her arms away
and crossed them over her chest. “She needs to be punched, you
know,” Ally told them.

RJ laughed and took a step closer. “Once school is
out, I’ll help you find her so you can punch her.”

Ally stared up at him. “Why?”

“Because she deserves to be punched, almost as much
as I do.” He took her hand. “I’m really sorry, Ally.”

Her lip trembled and she struggled to keep the tears
at bay. “It’s not me to who you should be apologizing. You were all
way off base about my dad and he certainly didn’t deserve for you
to say the things you said.”

A tear escaped and trailed down her cheek. She
quickly wiped it away and turned her head, afraid more would fall
and the boys would see them.

“We know, Ally,” RJ said. “We were wrong and way out
of line. We should have never accused Jay of those things. We
jumped to conclusions.”

She lifted her chin as a few more tears escaped. She
ignored them. “And do you know what he did, huh? When I told him
about the terrible things you guys said about him? He defended
you.” She jabbed a finger at all three of them. “He defended you
guys – said you guys didn’t know the whole story and he didn’t
blame you for jumping to conclusions.”

“Ally,” RJ pleaded. “We know we were wrong – terribly
wrong. We know Jay is a great guy and we know he’d give us the
shirt off his back if we needed it. We all feel terrible about all
of this.”

She nodded and bowed her head as the tears fell
freely. RJ moved closer and wrapped his arms around her. He kissed
the top of her head as he eased her in his arms. “And I’m really
sorry for how horribly I’ve treated you, too. You’re one of my best
friends in the world and I hurt you.”

“I’m okay,” she mumbled.

“No, you’re not,” he said. “But you will be – I’ll
make sure of it - just like I will make this up to your dad. We
went over and apologized to Jay this morning.”

She lifted her tearstained face to him. “You
did?”

He nodded. “We wanted to apologize to you, too, but
you’d already left. We were jerks, all of us, especially to think
that about Jay.”

He tried to smile as he released her and wiped the
tears off her cheeks. “I just took the news really hard. I’ve
always idolized my dad, wanted to be like him. I guess I wanted to
blame someone and Jay was an easy target.”

He held her head in both his hands and forced her to
look at him. “I’ve always had the utmost respect for your dad,
Ally, I swear -even after I overheard my parents talking about his
past. I figured it took a lot of guts to fight and beat a drug
addiction. Then he worked his ass off to get the band back to
number one. I was wrong, very wrong. And the worst part of it was
that I hurt someone I care so much for. And I lost a very dear
friend. I think that hurt most of all.”

Before she knew it, she was throwing her arms around
his neck and letting the tears slide down her face again. RJ
stroked her hair until she calmed down and pulled away. “I missed
you,” he said with a wink.

“I missed you, too,” she said, scrubbing her face.
“And I’m sorry, also.”

“Me next, cuz,” Jamie said, pulling her into an
embrace. “I’m so sorry we ever doubted you or your dad.”

“I know,” she said into his neck.

An electric current shot through her body when Cole
place his hands on her waist and gently eased her away from Jamie.
She turned and looked into his eyes, seeing the regret and hurt
pooled inside.

“RJ’s right about everything,” he told her. “It was
so easy for us to blame your dad instead of considering that it was
actually someone else’s idea and that maybe they all deserved a
little time to enjoy what they’ve worked so hard to earn.”

He stroked her hair softly. “I’m sorry for not having
more faith in your dad. I’m sorry for the things I said and I’m
especially sorry for not standing up with you and defending
you.”

She nodded and gave him a watery smile while running
a finger under her eye to clear the moisture.

Stephanie, who Ally hadn’t noticed until that moment,
approached her cautiously. She smiled weakly. “I really didn’t mean
the things I said about your dad. I just got angry and let the
words fly out of my mouth.”

Ally lifted a shoulder. “Yeah, I know. That happens
to me a lot, too.” Stephanie smiled in relief and gave her a
tentative hug. “I didn’t mean to hit you. Sometimes I swing first
and ask questions later.”

“It’s okay,” Stephanie reassured her. “I know I asked
for it.”

Cole laced his fingers through Ally’s. “Come on,” he
said, tugging on her arm. “Let’s go back to my room. We have a lot
of things to discuss.”

***

She took a tentative seat on RJ’s bed while Cole
paced the floor, running fingers through his hair. “So, Cole,
what’s up?”

He paused and sighed heavily. “I guess we need to
figure out where we stand. I mean, are we a couple or are we just
friends?”

She frowned as she watched him grow more agitated by
the minute. “I love you, Cole and I don’t think I could ever be
just your friend again.”

He gave her a wry grin, his brown eyes uncertain. “I
know what you mean, Al. But you have to admit, we pretty much suck
at this boyfriend/girlfriend thing.”

She pushed off the bed and stood in front of him. “I
know. But I’m not a quitter Cole. Just because it’s hard now
doesn’t mean it won’t get easier.”

He ran his fingers lightly over her cheek. “What
happens when you make the State Team this summer and you’re
traveling all over? And then next year when you’re still here and
I’m not? Or if Rhys Redden signs us?”

She glared at him. “Are you saying you don’t think we
should be together?”

“No,” he told her slowly. “I’m just throwing out
possible obstacles. These are things we have to think about. And
let’s face it; things have been pretty bad between us lately.”

“Well, I love you, Cole and if you love me like you
say you do, then you’ll want to fight for us to be together. I know
it will be tough and it will suck sometimes, but I happen to think
you’re worth it.” She paused to take a breath. “Look at what we’ve
been through so far.”

He grinned at her. “You’re not afraid of anything,
are you princess?”

“Not a lot of things, no,” she told him.

He gently gripped her face and pressed his lips to
hers. Her arms wrapped around him and she deepened the kiss, her
heart wrenching. When they finally pulled apart, they were both
gasping. “Okay, Al. Listen to me. I think we need to rethink this
whole thing. And are you willing to forgive me so easily after
everything I’ve put you through?”

She smiled. “Of course I am. Because of what my dad
said. He told me that if the roles had been reversed and if it
would have been Nate, I probably would have jumped to the wrong
conclusions, too.”

“You say that now but what about after you think
about it?”

Her brows dipped over her eyes. “Do you want me to
still be mad at you?”

“No,” he said, pulling her to his chest “But, if we
try again, I want it to work this time. I don’t want anything to
come between us.”

She bit her lip and rested her cheek to his chest.
“So, what should we do? Not date? Just be friends? See other
people?”

“Maybe,” he said slowly. “Or maybe we should just
step back and take some time to think things over. I really messed
things up Al, and not just in a bad boyfriend kind of way - more
like a bad friend kind of way. I just don’t want you to jump back
in my arms because you’re caught up in the emotions of making up
with us all. Do you understand what I mean?”

“Yeah. But how long, Cole? How long do I have to
think about this?” she asked.

He sighed. “As long as it takes.”

***

March faded quickly and April snuck in bring the
promise of spring break. Ally’s nerves were totally shot and she
snapped constantly at anyone unfortunate enough to cross her
path.

She had heeded Cole’s advice and had taken some time
to consider her relationship with him. She admitted to herself that
the attraction was definitely there. But was that enough?

She resumed sitting with them at meals and hanging
out - observing him carefully. Each smile or wink he gave her
caused her heart to dance and her stomach to flip flop. And when
she’d see him talking to other girls on campus, it would cut
through her so deep, her dark, black moods would increase.

She loved him and always would and knew she wanted to
be more than just friends with him. She was so sure of it that she
wanted to shout it from the rooftops. But she didn’t. She would
give him the time that he obviously needed so he could sort out his
own emotions. And if he decided he just wanted to be friends, she’d
accept it no matter how much it hurt.

The Thursday before classes ended for spring break,
Ally sat at the picnic tables outside the Student Center. She
opened a book she’d been assigned to read and thought she’d get a
head start on it. She needed something to help keep the anxiety of
her upcoming meeting with the State Team officials at bay.