In Search of Lucy (9 page)

Packing for a trip was one thing, but getting ready to spend countless hours trapped in Benny’s Durango, alongside the cheerleader, was completely mind-boggling to Lucy. And that wasn’t even taking into consideration the fact that she had to improve her lifestyle, let some strange doctor slice her up, part with a vital organ, and then spend time with her estranged sister, after she saved her life that is.
No problem,
Lucy thought.
I’ll just throw a suitcase together.

She made lists upon lists so she wouldn’t forget what needed to be done in the next few days before they left. There was a list for clothes to bring, services to stop, bills to pay, errands to run, and even a list of CDs and things for the car ride. She had so many lists that she actually made a checklist for her lists.

At the top of her to-dos: call Katie. As unbelievable as it sounded, the two had yet to speak on the phone. Lucy had plenty of correspondence with hospital staff both locally and in Fort Worth, and she had spoken to Rick once more. But Lucy had only tried Katie two times on her cell. The first time Lucy hung up, and the second time she left a voice mail, short and casual, asking for Katie to call her back. When Katie did call her, Lucy couldn’t get up the nerve to answer the call.

Then last week, Lucy had received a letter from Katie. An actual, 3-D piece of paper with words and sentiments on it. At first she thought it was some logistical detail that needed to be taken care of or a test result, or maybe even correspondence about the trip. As soon as she unfolded it, her eyes scanned across the full-length letter, and she knew. Spilled out of her heart and onto the page was everything Katie had been thinking and feeling since the moment Carly was born. She finally understood about sacrifice and wanting to protect your child. She realized that Lucy had done that same thing for her all those years ago.

Lucy couldn’t slow down her pace and was gliding across the words to make her way to phrases like, “I’m so sorry,” and “I realize now,” and “You were always there,” until the words grew blurry from a flood of tears. The last two lines said, “I don’t even know if I deserve to take this from you, but I have to do whatever I can to make sure I’m here for my daughter. Thank you, Lucy, for giving me this chance.”

Lucy flipped through her lists and other papers as she leaned against the kitchen counter. At the bottom of the stack was the letter. She wanted to read it once more and bring it with her on the trip. Halfway through and the doorbell rang. She wasn’t expecting anyone and didn’t feel like talking, so she ignored it. Next came a loud knock. Looking up in annoyance, she set the letter down and crept to the door. Through the peephole she could make out that it was Dale, but she had no idea what he could want.

“I’m a little busy right now, Dale.” She stepped back, shouting from behind the door.

Dale smiled up to the peephole and waved, thinking she was looking. Then he bent down and picked up something from the ground. “I thought you might want this package.” He held it up. “I signed for it yesterday.”

Lucy unlocked the door and opened it a foot. Creepy Dale was never to be trusted.

“It’s pretty heavy. Wonder what it is.” He turned the flat square package sideways as if he needed to slide it through a chained door.

Lucy opened the door all the way and grabbed the package. “Thanks for bringing it over.” She tucked the box under her arm and started to close the door.

“Need anything else, Lucy?” Dale gleamed his gray-gold smile through the closing space of the door.

“No thanks,” Lucy said just as the door closed.

She walked over and set the package on the counter. Her initial guess was that it was something from the hospital, until she saw the return sticker:
DST Marketing.
That sounded vaguely familiar. The weight was sufficient enough to be something exciting, so she ripped open one of the end flaps and revealed a clump of bubble wrap. Holding the box with one hand, she gripped the protected object and slid it out onto the counter.

It can’t be,
she thought.
Who would be sending me a…laptop?
She unwrapped the portable computer and stared dumbfounded. Could it be some sort of mistake, or maybe a marketing gimmick?
Marketing!
It hit her like a bolt of lightning. DST Marketing is where Kyle worked, but it still didn’t make any sense. They had spoken at dinner about technology and how completely out of it she was. Maybe she mentioned she didn’t have a laptop, but that was no reason to send one over. She would have to call him for an explanation.

Lucy went over to her purse to get her cell phone and the business card Kyle had given her. With her eyes still glued to the mystery gift, she dialed the number.

After only one ring, she heard a young male voice answer: “Good afternoon, DST Marketing.”

Although it was perfectly fine for her to call Kyle, she still felt a sense of nervousness. She tried to make her voice sound professional. “Hello, could you please connect me with Kyle Benson.”

“One moment please. May I say who’s calling?”

“This is Lucy Lang.”

“Of course, Ms. Lang, I’ll connect you.”

Expecting to hear some kind of boring Muzak, she was impressed by the upbeat tune transmitting in her ear. Within seconds she recognized “Pressure” by Billy Joel, but she didn’t get a chance to enjoy it.

“Hey.” Kyle came across sounding happy and surprised. “I’m glad you called.”

“I think you were expecting me to call.”

“Why do you say that?”

Lucy could hear the smile behind his words. She thought it was cute but was impatient and wanted answers to come more quickly. “C’mon, Kyle. I got the computer…but I don’t get it.”

“Didn’t you open it?” he said, a bit confused.

“What do you mean? Of course I opened it—that’s how I knew it was a laptop.”

“No, I mean the laptop itself.”

“Oh, hold on a sec.” She walked back over to the counter and balanced the phone against her ear with her shoulder. “I’m opening it now.” It took a couple of tries before she found the piece that released the top, and then she popped it open. Lying on the keyboard was a piece of paper:
kbenson@dstmarketing. com. Please take care, Lucy, and keep in touch. Kyle

The long silence triggered some second-guessing from Kyle. “I hope you don’t think I’m…a stalker or something.” He flapped his green and blue tie against his desk. “I got a new laptop and thought you might want my old one.”

“Oh…”

“It’s still pretty new. You can use it for a lot of things, maybe even write about this unique experience you’re about to have. And…we could keep in touch through e-mail…if you want to.”

“It was very nice of you, and…of course I want to keep in touch. The funny thing is, I don’t even have an e-mail.”

“Oh, well they’re free and very easy to get.”

“I’ll have Benny set it up for me.” Lucy took Kyle’s note and added it to her stack of lists. “He’s kind of a computer geek, which will work out great if I have any problems while we’re on the road.”

With surprise in his voice, Kyle said, “You mean Benny is going with you?” He leaned back in his chair and ran his fingers through his sandy locks.

Lucy didn’t pick up on Kyle’s disappointment and was inexperienced when it came to male jealousy. “Yeah, he offered. My car’s kind of a dud, so it’s much safer.”

Not wanting to sound like a jerk, he replied, “Right, that does make sense.”

A screeching halt in the conversation, followed by an awkward silence, prompted Lucy to say, “Well, I’m leaving in three days, so I guess I’ll…send you an e-mail from the road.”

Suddenly, a short, plump female popped her head into Kyle’s office, and he held up a finger to buy some time. “Lucy…I just wanted to say that I had a really great time with you last week, and I know we didn’t have much of a chance to get to know each other…” the woman caught her cue and bowed out with an apologetic wave, “…but I hope we can do that when you get back.”

Lucy didn’t let her voice reveal her smile. “I hope so too. And thanks again for the computer.”

“Bye, Lucy.”

And she was gone.

Kyle leaned forward on his desk and tried to dissect the conversation. There was no sense in worrying about when he would see Lucy, or if she’d come back, or even about Benny. His only choice was to wait and hope that the magic of the Internet would keep them connected.

This one definitely caught Lucy by surprise. It was a smart move on Kyle’s part. He knew Lucy didn’t like to talk on the phone much. He also knew she wasn’t very open with her feelings, and most people tend to express more in writing. She had to give him props for thinking of that one. On the other hand, writing wasn’t really Lucy’s thing either. Her sister Katie was the one who liked to write. Lucy’s outlet for how she was feeling was her artwork. When things went her way, which was not too often, her paintings were bright and beautiful. If she felt down or lonely or frustrated, her creations were dark and sad. But Kyle didn’t know her well enough yet to figure that one out.

Lucy pulled out one of her lists and reached across the counter to snag a pen. At the top in all caps she wrote: GET E-MAIL.

Rick drummed on the steering wheel and bobbed his head while belting out a Scorpions hit from his favorite CD. His serenades never got old to Katie. She sat in the passenger seat with her feet up on the dash as Carly giggled in the backseat. Rick beamed and glanced between the road, Katie, and the rearview mirror to catch a glimpse of his other favorite girl. Any onlooker would say this family was returning from the beach or a fun family gathering, and not another arduous trip to the doctor’s office.

“Come on, girls, sing it with me.” Rick sang along, hamming it up as usual, and when the girls tried to join him, he obnoxiously sang louder. Katie laughed and wiggled her pink painted toenails.

Always the hero, Rick knew when Katie needed a laugh…or a hug, or whatever it happened to be at that time. He was always very in tune to her, and actually to females in general. Although he was truly a guy’s guy, he was also very comfortable in a woman’s world. In school, he always noticed when girls got a haircut, or he would compliment them on a new blouse. Sometimes he even helped them with their boyfriend issues. Thankfully, most of them took it as flirty and not feminine.

“Why don’t we have family movie night tonight?” Rick suggested cheerfully. It was a tradition they started when Carly was almost three. They put a big blanket in front of the TV and ate dinner on it while watching a movie. The older she got, the better the movies got. Both Rick and Katie were relieved to be out of the
Winnie the Pooh
stage.

“Yeah,” Carly squealed from the backseat. “Can we, Mommy?”

“I guess so.” Katie turned to the side to face Carly. “First you have to finish making that card for Papa’s birthday.”

Carly folded her arms and cocked her head to the side. “Mommy…do you think I would forget my special Papa?”

Katie and Rick exchanged glances and held in their snorts.

“Of course not, sweetie. I was just making sure.”

Rick pulled into the driveway, avoiding the paper that was still flattened to the ground after he ran over it on the way out that morning. They had slept in and didn’t get to their usual routine of trading the paper sections. Rick liked the sports section, of course, and Katie always started with the local section. The problem was that many times the “Back Page,” a section that had interesting tidbits from around the world, was on the back of the sports page. So Rick would try to hurry and finish reading all the stats before Katie finished reading about the schools and communities.

“I’ll get her,” Rick said as he hopped out and slammed his door. He opened the back door to Carly already freeing herself from the seatbelt. She greeted him like they had just been reunited and attached herself like a spider to his body. They had grown so close. She had become so attached to him with all of Katie’s medical problems. That both comforted and upset Katie. She couldn’t have been more thankful for the bond they were forming, but at the same time, she was jealous that Carly wanted Rick more and more. Her friends told her that it was just a phase, that most kids cling to one parent at some point. “Alright, you freeloader…ride’s over.” Rick started to lean over to put Carly down. Her arms and legs were locked around him.

“Carry me in, Daddy.”

Rick walked up the cement path where Katie was waiting up ahead.

“Got your keys?” Rick shrugged as if he had no choice. He rubbed his free hand across Katie’s shoulder to let her know he understood her feelings.

Katie reached in her purse, pulled out a set of keys, and stuck one in the door. Walking into her home was always a pleasure. It was her sanctuary. When she returned there, it meant things were good, or at least better because she was home and not at the hospital. She set her keys and purse on a small antique desk at the entry. Above hung a decorative mirror she used to have in her bedroom growing up. It was one of the few furnishings she took with her when she left. Rick could see her reflection, but he didn’t need it to know that she was not enjoying her usual homecoming.

“Why don’t you be a big girl and go to the den to pick out our movie for tonight?”

Carly released her grip and took advantage of the opportunity. “Any one I want?” Carly looked up with a mouthful of teeth and gums.

“Any one,” Rick replied.

“Yay!” She did a little celebratory dance and ran out of the room.

Rick and Katie both walked into the living room and sat down on a big beige couch that puffed up when you sat on it. Katie leaned on one arm and tucked her legs up and to the side. Rick wasn’t ready to get comfortable yet and leaned his elbows on his knees.

“You know how much she loves you, don’t you?” His voice was soft, and he watched her face for the answer.

Katie’s smile let Rick know that it was something else that was upsetting her. “Of course I do.”

“Alright then, spill it.”

“What?”

“I know something else is wrong.”

“I don’t know…”

Rick fell back against the couch and jumped into place right next to Katie. His light brown eyes stared right into hers as if he were reading her mind.

“Well I do.” With one hand behind her head holding it in place, he transported the information from her mind to his. “You’re nervous about seeing your sister coming.” His confident smile sang triumph.

Katie closed her eyes and tilted her head forward until their foreheads touched. “It’s not just that.”

“Then what?”

“The whole thing is just too weird.” She lowered her head further and leaned it on his shoulder. “I haven’t even spoken to her, and I don’t know how she feels about doing this.”

“What do you mean? She wants to do it or she wouldn’t be going through all of this.”

“You know that’s not true. Maybe she feels obligated. Maybe she’s still mad at me and that’s why she hasn’t returned my calls.”

“First of all, who cares! This is only your life we’re talking about.”

“Rick!”

“What? If she’s still upset, she’ll get over it eventually. But I bet she wouldn’t get over losing you.” Rick popped up and went over to a black end table where a portable phone sat. “Secondly, I say we take care of this mystery right now.” He swiped the phone from its station and glided back to the couch, gently placing the phone in her lap on the way.

Katie shrugged and picked imaginary lint from the sofa. “I don’t know…maybe I shouldn’t push her.”

“Chicken.”

“I am not.” She pulled her hair together in a bunch and tied it in a bun. “I guess I just feel bad…for blaming so many things on her and then just leaving. I was so wrong…about everything.”

“Hey, you were just a confused kid.”

“I was a brat.”

“Was?” Rick displayed his poker face, then readied himself for the blow Katie would surely deliver.

Katie let him off the hook this time and sat still, staring at the phone. “The thing that makes it so hard—that makes this so confusing—is that I’m not sure about a lot of things. You know how when you’re a little kid and you remember some place a certain way and then when you go back it’s nothing like you pictured?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, my whole life kind of seems like that. I try to remember my mother and Lucy, and things that happened, and now that I’m older…some of those memories seem different.” Katie touched her fingertip to the corner of her eye, attempting to stop the flow that would certainly come. “Why do I have to deal with this now? I almost wish…I wish that it wasn’t…”

“That is wasn’t Lucy?”

“Is that wrong?” Katie used her sleeve to dab at the tears before they made it down her face.

Rick put his arm around Katie and smiled. “It’s not wrong to be scared. But you can’t put this off any longer. She’ll be here in less than a week, and it will be even more awkward if you wait until then to talk. Now, I’m going to go keep my other little girl busy…” Rick’s voice changed into his
baby talk
voice, “and you’re going to be a big girl and call your sister.”

Katie laughed and slapped Rick’s behind as he got up from the couch. Then she started punching in numbers on the phone. Her heart raced and her stomach sank as two rings went by. Then…

“Hello?”

“Lucy…it’s me, Katie.”