In Your Honor (21 page)

“
Break a leg,” he croaked
out instead.

***

Blake played Double Blind Study's set
with more exuberance than usual. When the encore finished, all he
could think of was seeing Lucy again. He really felt like their
bond was growing in leaps and bounds. It was so close to where they
used to be, but it felt so much sweeter. Was it too soon to expect
something in return from her? Was it too early to ask for
forgiveness and another chance?

Unable to resist seeing her, he
climbed onto her bus just as they were taking off.

“
May we help you?” Chad
asked, playing receptionist.

“
Hey,” Lucy smiled at him
from the floor in surprise.

“
What the heck are you
doing down there?” He laughed and kicked off his shoes, sitting
down beside her. He envisioned sinking his fingers into her silky
hair and trying to convince her to stay in the same bunk with him
tonight. But then he remembered they weren't alone.

“
She likes to feel the
road. Damn hippie,” Taylor joked.

“
What are you doing here?”
she asked, her dark eyes watching him curiously.

He noticed her phone resting on her
stomach. “Waiting to hear from your daddy?”

Her eyes widened slightly and she
licked her lips quickly.

“
No, her dad already
called. She's waiting for her
boyfriend
to call,” Chad replied,
and Blake felt ice fill his limbs. Boyfriend?

“
Shut it, Chad.” Lucy
glared at him. “He's not my boyfriend.”

“
Shane?” Blake stared at
the floor, making sure to keep his face and voice even. Jealousy
wouldn't do him any favors right now, and he needed to keep hold of
himself. Even if it felt like someone had just opened a black hole
in his chest cavity.

“
Yeah,
Shane,
” Chad sniffed. “God's
frickin' gift,” he grumbled.

“
Would you quit?” Lucy sat
up and smacked Chad's leg. She rolled her eyes and looked at Blake,
waiting for his reaction. But he couldn't move. Or speak. Or
breathe.

“
Whatever. You're taking
your week off to go see him. That sounds pretty official to me.”
Chad yelped when Lucy reached over and twisted the soft skin of his
calf.

Blake focused on keeping his heart
rate even. So she was going to see him. That changed things quite a
bit, didn't it? Blake had felt so secure in the fact that Shane was
far away. That had been naïve and short-sighted. Guess she wasn't
feeling what he had been after all.

“
Where are you going?” he
asked, feeling his jaw twitch slightly.

“
He's flying me to
Encinitas. I already talked to Luke and he said you guys could pick
me up in San Diego for the show.” It came out like a whispered
apology.

And Luke knew? Blake pushed down his
feelings of betrayal and again focused on his breathing. He could
deal with Luke later.

“
You're spending a whole
week with him, must be pretty serious,” he stated flatly, trying to
look as disinterested as possible even as the ice in his limbs made
a slow migration to his chest.

“
There are a lot of people
going. This would technically be our first date.” Lucy's voice
sounded strained.

He finally met her eyes and could see
in their brown depths, those deep pools of passion that he loved so
desperately, that she wanted his approval. She wasn't trying to
hurt him, she was scared of his reaction. That was his fault. He
had done that to her because of his actions in the past. No wonder
she hadn't told him yet.

With an effort, he softened his face.
“He's taking you to one of the most beautiful beaches in the
country for your first date? Sounds like a winner to
me.”

Relief washed over her features,
making her look even more beautiful, which sent another pain
through his lungs as he struggled for oxygen. She smiled slightly,
and as if on cue, her phone lit up with a call. He nodded at her
questioning face and she excused herself to the back
lounge.

Stuart, Taylor and Chad didn't say
anything as the rumble of the bus filled the cabin. No doubt they
could all feel the despair rolling off of him, and he appreciated
their silence. Her laughter broke through from the back room
intermittently and Blake felt his spirit die just a little more. So
Shane could make her laugh. Dick.

“
Hey.” Taylor flipped him
a video game controller. “You wanna help us kill some
Nazis?”

“
Absolutely.”

Carl wanted a cigarette. Mostly so he had
something to do as he waited for the next bomb to fall. Not that
the tour had been going badly—it wasn't. In fact, it had been going
very well, which is why Carl was feeling on edge. When things
seemed too easy, it was usually because they were.

He'd given up smoking for two reasons. One:
it was time. He wasn't a teenager anymore and it wasn't cool. Not
that it ever really had been. But with the yellow teeth and
thinning hair, it was definitely further away from cool than ever
before. And two: Kendra literally cringed every time he lit one up.
Come to find out, she'd lost a close relative to lung cancer. She
was pretty sensitive to the issue.

Normally, Carl didn't give a shit who felt
what about what cause, but Kendra was nice to him. In fact, she was
downright adorable. She never lectured him on his bad habits like
some had in the past. She was sweet, understanding, and truly
worried about him all the time. He hated it when people worried
about him. So he had quit smoking. Cold turkey.

The bands were healthy,
sober and getting along with one another just fine. In fact,
everyone was downright chummy, which only added to Carl's
apprehension. Things were
too
easy, it seemed. Adding Lucy to the bill was
great, Taylor Stevens was learning the ropes quickly, and Double
Blind Study were the consummate professionals of any tour manager's
dream.

“
How's the toothpick
working for ya?” his friend, David Warren, asked from the other end
of the phone. They'd been friends longer than Carl could remember,
and they'd probably be friends until the day they died. David was a
novelist of sorts, but Carl had never read his work. Their
friendship didn't deem it necessary. They'd seen each other through
loss of family members, horrible girlfriends, the ups and downs of
their respective careers, and now they'd both quit
smoking.

Carl rolled the toothpick across his lip
with his tongue and then back again. “It's all right. I'm not ready
to declare it a cure-all, though.”

He heard David's soft chuckle. “It sounds
like things are going very well. What are you so worried
about?”

“
Shit, Warren, you know
me. I wouldn't be normal if I wasn't worried.” Carl frowned as he
noticed a crowd of nearby crew members forming in an area behind
one of the buses.

“
Maybe it'll be a
drama-free tour this time,” David speculated rationally.

Carl could now hear raised voices where the
crew members were gathering. “Not a chance. In fact, I have to go.”
Carl rounded the corner and scowled. “It seems my most experienced
talent has decided to take up boxing.”

“
Damn. Call me
back.”

He hung up the phone and slipped it into his
back pocket just in time to see Blake take a swing at Luke. Luke
dodged the blow and shoved Blake into the rear end of the bus.

“
I don't want to fight
you, Blake!” Luke shouted, his face red with anger.

Blake reoriented himself,
his face twisted in hurt and rage. “You have no right to tell me
what you
think
you know about me!”

“
Blake! This isn't my
fault!” Luke shifted his body, preparing for another attempt from
Blake, but it wasn't enough. Blake's fist shot out and cracked Luke
in the jaw, sending the singer reeling backwards.

Luke righted his lean body, all attempts at
diplomacy vanishing. He charged headfirst and caught Blake in the
stomach with a shoulder, sending them both to the ground. He
straddled the guitarist, gripping the front of his shirt with one
hand while sending a fist into Blake's face with the other, landing
high on his cheek. His fist pumped back quickly and hit Blake
again, this time in the mouth.

His arm cocked back again, preparing to
strike another blow, when Carl grabbed him from behind. Carl
wrapped his arms around the stronger mans shoulders and hauled him
backwards. A couple of the guys from security snagged Blake by his
arms as he scrambled to his feet.

Carl moved to stand between the two men,
shoving one hand against Luke's chest.

“
What the
hell?!
” he yelled,
looking back and forth between the two men who were both breathing
hard. “Are you kidding me with this?”

“
Stay out of this, Carl,”
Luke seethed, his glare not leaving Blake's.

“
Oh, like hell.” Carl
pushed Luke back further. “Look at you two idiots! I thought we
left this shit behind years ago!”

By now, Sway, Mike and Harrison had been
alerted to what was happening and showed up to assist. Carl was
thankful Lenny had taken Kendra and Lucy out for lunch, so that
none of them had to witness this. He was the opposite of proud of
his boys today.

“
Some of us don't know
when to grow up,” Luke bit out towards Blake, who stiffened as the
security guys tightened their hold on him.

“
You think you know
everything!” Blake growled. “Stop pretending like you give a shit
about us. We're not brothers. Brother's don't betray each
other.”

“
I didn't do this, Blake!
You told her you wanted to be friends! That means she's allowed to
see other people! You can't seriously expect the rest of us to keep
her on hold for you!”

Carl ground his molars
together in frustration. “This is about a
woman
?!
Again
?!” He was shouting. He tried
to never shout, it was bad for his blood pressure.

Blake finally met his eyes and then dropped
his head in defeat. Carl then looked to Luke, who appeared to
shrink back a little as well. Carl wanted to knock their skulls
together.

“
Would you two
knuckleheads look at what you've done to yourselves? You have a
show in a couple hours! Luke, how do you plan on explaining that
bruise on your face to your wife? Or how about you, Blake? You want
to tell Lucy about yours? Are you proud of what you've
accomplished? This is bullshit!”

Fist fights had been a regular occurrence
when they were younger. Carl couldn't count how many times he'd
accidentally gotten socked trying break up another brawl between
the boys. Blake and Luke always seemed to be the ones to use their
fists first and their words last.

Blake used the back of his hand to wipe the
blood off his mouth. He looked at the red streak soberly for a
minute and then sighed heavily.

“
I guess I overreacted,”
he chuckled lightly.

“
You guess?” Carl glowered
at him, but was relieved that the fight was over with as soon as it
had started. “Frickin' rock stars and their frickin'
issues.”

“
I'm sorry, Luke.” Blake
took a step towards Luke and held out his hand in truce.

Luke grabbed it and pulled Blake in for a
hug. “I'm sorry too, man.”

“
Best friends again?” Carl
asked dryly. They nodded in unison and smiled at him
sheepishly.

“
Sometimes we have to work
things out the old fashioned way.” Luke gave a half-smile and Carl
rolled his eyes.

Blake wiped more blood from his mouth. “You
got me good, too.”

“
You've gotten quicker
with that right hook. I didn't even see it coming.” Luke rubbed the
already swollen area on his jaw. Blake grinned, breaking open the
split in his lip even further.

“
You two need therapy,”
Carl grumbled, and fished his phone out of his pocket. He stalked
away while redialing David.

“
So, tell me the story,”
David answered.

“
Apparently boys will be
boys,” Carl said tersely and spit out his toothpick, fishing a new
one from his front shirt pocket. “I was just thinking, maybe it's
time I write my memoirs.”

“
Memoirs? Surviving Rock
and Roll: The Life and Times of the World's Most Stressed-Out Tour
Manager.” David chuckled at his own joke.

“
Don't laugh. You're the
one who has to write it down.”

***

Blake shouldn't have hit Luke. It wasn't his
fault that Blake felt so helpless when it came to Lucy.

And it was true, Blake couldn't expect to
claim friendship only while keeping her reserved for whenever he
got good and ready to stop being an idiot. But thankfully Luke was
quick to forgive, as always, and Lucy wouldn't find out about the
real reason for his split lip and black eye.

He had come up with a dozen different ways
to keep Lucy from going to California with Shane. He lay awake at
night, plotting, scheming and devising the most brilliant of ideas,
and by morning he'd have circled back around to his original
conviction: she deserved to be happy.