Incubus (73 page)

hope. “Sansenoy?” I asked. What if he was coming back because we were close? What if he

anticipated our success, knew we’d be able to lock the seal, and he was preparing to grant the promise

he’d made to me last year?

Karayan shook her head. “It’s sick that you find this so comforting,” she said. “You do realize they

are our sworn enemies, and I mean that
literally.
As in, they swore an actual, literal
oath
to stamp us

out.”

I turned back to the faint haze that should have been Angela Linwood’s dream.

“So that’s it? Now I get the silent treatment?” Karayan crossed her arms, still irked. Then she saw

the haze, still hovering above the pool of stars. “Oh.”

I looked at her, but I already knew what she was going to say. “She’s gone, isn’t she?”

Karayan nodded. “Dream energy takes a while to dissipate after—” she touched the haze, then

winced, pulling her hand back. “A hard death.” She glanced at me. “Who was she?”

“A friend.” I looked down at my hands, summoning the strength to tell Seth his mother was dead.

I opened my eyes. Lucas and Seth were watching my face, hungry for news.

I sat up, then turned toward them with a heavy heart. They saw the truth in my eyes before I

gathered the courage to speak.

“No...” Seth whispered.

“Seth.” I ached for him. “I’m so sorry.”

Seth fled to the back room.

Lucas stood. “I’ll go tell Hale.”

“Tell him to have the Guard search the college campus for her body,” I said.

Lucas gave me a solemn, searching look. Then he walked to the foyer, opened the front door, and

left. He returned a few minutes later. We sat together on the couch, afraid to touch, listening to the

harsh, wracking grief that poured from Seth in the back room.

30 minutes later, at 10:45 in the morning, Dad called with news. I’d been right. They’d found her

body. Angela Linwood had been murdered.

They didn’t return until close to nine o’clock that night. The police had questions. The coroner needed

to make an identification. There were forms upon forms that needed to be filled out. Rather than put

Seth through the pain of seeing his mother’s body, Dad and Gretchen had identified it.

When they walked through the front door that night, I could see the toll the day had taken on them

both. Wordlessly, Gretchen held her arms out to Lucas. He walked to her and they held each other

fiercely. I turned away, giving them their privacy.

Dad pulled me into a hug and I gripped him tight.

“I would die if anything happened to you,” I said.

“No, you wouldn’t,” he said sharply. I pulled back to look into his face, startled by the vehemence

behind his words. Dad brushed a loose strand of my hair back behind one ear. “I love you. I know how

strong you are. If anything ever happened to me, I know you’d do the right thing.”

“Dad?”

“Angela died fighting for a worthwhile cause,” he said softly. “That’s more than most people can

say. The best way to honor her—to honor any of our fallen—is to carry on the fight.”

I let him draw me back into another hug, but the room seemed to spin around me. He didn’t have

to say it for me to know.

Dad believed this war would kill him.

Chapter 11

The day dawned bright and clear. Sunlight betrayed the grief that filled our house, reminding us that

the world outside marched on cheerfully, untouched by our suffering.

I found Seth sitting on the living room couch, wrapped in the blanket from the guest bed. Dark

bags circled his eyes, which were swollen from crying. The exhaustion of the night had finally caught

him in its clutches. Seth sat still, numb.

He didn’t look up when I entered. Something sizzled in the kitchen, and a moment later I caught

the faint whiff of butter and eggs. Instead of joining Dad while he made breakfast, I sat on the couch

next to Seth.

There was nothing to say. Nothing that would make this easier for him. But I could sit here and

offer whatever comfort my company might bring him.

“I can’t believe she’s gone,” Seth said. He didn’t move, didn’t look at me. But the words unleashed

another flood of grief. Seth tipped his head forward, fighting to contain the raw emotion coursing

through his body. Tentatively, I reached out and clasped his hand.

Seth threaded his fingers around mine in response. His hand was warm and strong. His shoulders

shook. I couldn’t just sit there, watching. I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around him. I held

him helplessly, knowing nothing I could do would change the fact that his mom wasn’t coming back.

He straightened, turning to face me. The look he gave me was so piercing, so intimate, that I froze.

Being this close to him, feeling his warmth, seeing his vulnerability—something stirred within me.

The Lilitu storm.

Seth’s eyes tracked me, waiting. I found myself staring at him, noticing really for the first time the

powerful lines of his jaw, the perfect symmetry of his face. The storm within me gathered strength,

and I found myself wondering what it would feel like to kiss him.

“Braedyn,” Seth started. He brushed the fingers of his free hand along my arm. I jerked back,

breathless.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered. Guilt tore through me. Seth was in unimaginable pain—but I couldn’t be

what he needed. Not the way he needed. “I—I should call Lucas.”

“Lucas.” Bitterness edged into Seth’s voice. “Lucas tried to kill you when he found out what you

were.”

I stared, stung. “How did you—?”

“But when I found out—” Seth struggled to keep his voice steady. His blue eyes held mine, full of

conviction. “I knew you were still you.”

“I—I know, Seth.” I studied my hands.

“He doesn’t appreciate you. Not the way I could. Not the way I do.”

“Things with Lucas—they’re complicated.” I met Seth’s eyes, trying to make him understand.

“But what we have—”

Seth stood, turning away. But I saw the expression of pain that crossed his face. “Okay. I get it.”

“I’m sorry. If things were different—”

“I’ve got bigger problems right now,” Seth snapped. But then he glanced at me, vulnerable and

scared. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to—” He swallowed. “That came out wrong.”

“It’s okay.” I stood, folding my arms around myself. “No offense taken.”

“I just can’t get it out of my mind that Mom was killed for something she found out.” He turned to

me, pleading for understanding. “I have to know what it was.”

“It won’t change anything,” I said softly.

“If she died discovering something important?” Seth’s eyes shone with tears.

“She wouldn’t want you to put yourself in danger.”

“You didn’t know my mom.” Seth’s hands balled into fists. “If she found something important,

she wouldn’t want it to be lost just because she died.”

“You can’t know what—” I started. But he glanced at me with such pain I stopped.

“Please,” he whispered. “Please help me.”

I opened my mouth to argue, but instead I sighed. “How?”

Seth’s eyes lit with hope. “All her research should be at home. Maybe, if we could just sit down

with it for a few hours.”

“Breakfast is ready, kids.” Dad entered from the foyer. He looked surprised when he saw me.

“You’re dressed for school? I thought you’d want to stay home.” His eyes drifted toward Seth, sitting

on the couch next to me.

“Oh.” I glanced at Seth, feeling like an idiot. “I’m so sorry. Of course. If you want me to stay

home with you—”

“No,” Seth said. “You go. I’d rather be alone right now.”

Dad didn’t look happy about this. “You’re sure about that?”

“I’m sure.” Seth rubbed at his eyes, as though he were on the verge of tears again. Dad looked

away, giving Seth his privacy.

“Okay. But if you need anything, you call one of us, deal?”

“Yeah, okay.”

When Dad vanished back into the kitchen I turned to Seth.

“It has to be today,” Seth whispered. “Please. Sneak out after first period and come get me.” When

I didn’t respond right away, he grabbed my arm. “Braedyn, I’m begging you. Help me.”

“Okay.”

“Thank you.” Seth let out a long breath, then stood and headed into the kitchen. I followed him,

and we sat at the kitchen island. Dad had laid out two plates of eggs, toast, and bacon. My stomach

growled as soon as I saw the food, but Seth only stared at his plate.

Dad noticed, and put a hand on Seth’s shoulder. “You’ll always have a place with the Guard,” he

said. “Don’t forget that.”

Seth nodded.

Dad pulled me aside. “Be there for Seth today?”

I nodded. If Dad sensed my unease, he must have chalked it up to the events of the previous night.

If he’d known what we planned, he’d never have let us out of his sight.

Lucas was waiting by my car when I emerged into the bright morning. He straightened when he saw

me, shifting his weight uncomfortably.

“Hey,” he offered.

“Hey.”

“I didn’t know if you guys were going to school today or not.”

“Seth wants to be alone, and as for me,” I said, glancing at the house behind us, “I need a change

of scenery.”

“Yeah. Right.” Lucas’s eyes fell to the dark stain on my front porch. I knew he was reliving the

last 24 hours in his mind. “I think we both do.”

I unlocked the car. Lucas opened the front passenger door, but didn’t get in right away.

“How’s he doing?” Lucas asked me.

“About how you probably expect. His mother’s dead. He’s sad. And angry.”

Lucas nodded. “I wish I didn’t know how that felt—but I get it.” I wanted to reach out and touch