Infinite Love (42 page)

‘So it’s ok for him to see someone else and not for me? He didn’t seem to care about us being married when he cheated on me with Chelsea, that’s double standards, Doug. He cheated on me when I was still sitting at home crying, waiting for him to ring me. Don’t you dare judge me by different standards than you apply to your own best friend.’ He looked at me shocked and I turned and ran back to my bedroom and threw myself on the bed as I heard Gabe yelling in the background and Doug telling him to calm down.

‘Stay in here,’ Lexi advised as she put her head through the door. ‘I’ll help Doug get him back to his and make sure he doesn’t come back, ok? Try and get some sleep.’

‘Thank you,’ I whispered, wishing this nightmare would just end. ‘Lex, would you give these back to him?’ She raised her eyebrows as she looked at my wedding, engagement and eternity ring that I held out in my palm. I nodded, sadly, and she took them and gave me sad smile in return and closed the door.

‘Mia … Mia, wake up,’ whispered Lexi. I groaned and stretched, I was still fully dressed, in the same position that I’d fallen asleep in.

‘Lex?’ I groaned as I half opened my eyes. ‘What time is it?’

‘Nearly eight.’

‘Eight? What are doing to me? I’m tired. Come and lie down with me and go to sleep. You must be tired too. I didn’t hear you come back in.’

‘I was a while, he was in a bit of a state.’

‘So why aren’t you in bed asleep?’

‘Because you need to come with me. I have something for you.’

‘It can wait,’ I mumbled as I nuzzled my pillow.

‘No, it can’t, get up, you’re coming with me now.’

‘I don’t want to,’ I moaned with a pout. ‘I’m cosy and tired.’

‘Trust me, when do I ever ask you for anything? Actually that’s a shitty way of trying to blackmail you, I always ask you for stuff. Ok, if you love your best friend you’ll come with me, now.’

‘There’d better be a kilo of Juicy Pear Jelly Belly’s, cradled in the arms of a Gabriel Macht blow up doll waiting for me in there, Lexi Clarke,’ I grumbled as she dragged me up.

‘Ok, close your eyes and don’t open them until I tell you.’

‘O don’t worry, if I close them I’ll fall back to sleep, so you have no worries there.’ I did as I was told and she took my hand and made me walk.

‘Now, I’m going to sit you in the recliner so don’t panic,’ she advised as she lowered me down.

‘Seriously, closed eyes
and
the recliner? That’s sleep heaven. This is best friend cruelty, Lexi. You need to get me some caffeine for whatever you have planned because I’m not going to make it through five minutes.’

‘I’ll get you a coffee in a while. Now, do you trust me?’

‘Nothing good ever comes of the phrase “Do you trust me,” because that means you’re about to do something that I’m really not going to like.’

‘Are you just going to back chat me for the next hour, or answer the question?’

‘Seems I’m not the only grumpy one on lack of sleep.’

‘God damn it Mia, do you trust me?’ she snapped.

‘Well, that’s a stupid question, of course I trust you.’

‘Then go with it and I promise any doubts you have when you open your eyes will be gone by the time it’s over.’

‘Ok, you’re seriously scaring me now.’

‘Promise me, Mia,’ she pleaded. I frowned. She was serious, she was really worried I wasn’t going to be happy.

‘I promise, ok?’

‘Great.’ I felt her sit on the arm of the chair and take one of my hands in hers. ‘Open your eyes,’ she ordered. I did and stiffened up immediately. Sitting opposite me on the sofa were Gabe and Doug. I closed my eyes again and rubbed them. I was so tired I was seeing things. Why would Gabe and Doug be sitting in the lounge? I opened them again and inhaled sharply to see that they
were
both sitting there. Gabe was dressed in his black jeans with a sweatshirt and a white t-shirt was just visible underneath. He had stubble all over his face, looking devastatingly handsome, even with signs of a serious hangover. He was leaning forward watching me, his elbows on his knees, his hands tightly clenched.

‘Lexi? What the hell’s going on?’ I demanded as I turned to look up at her. Why was she was inviting him around when I was trying to get over him.

‘I helped get Gabe back to bed last night and Doug and I ended up talking. Doug was really confused. He couldn’t understand why you thought that Gabe had cheated on you with Chelsea. Naturally, we had a shouting match while we each protected our own best friends, before we both discovered the truth.’

‘Which is?’ I sighed.

‘I found out that Gabe never slept with Chelsea, it was a huge misunderstanding on our part and I told Doug that you never slept with Tyler.’ I just stared at her, not sure I was hearing right.

‘Why are doing this?’

‘You promised you’d trust me, Mia. After Doug told me what had really happened, I got up early this morning and went to see Gabe and told him myself that you’d lied about sleeping with Tyler. So as it was all in the open that neither of you cheated, I told him to come here this morning when he’d sobered up and sort this all out with you before ...
no interruptions
,’ she warned as I went to object. ‘Doug, please will you tell her what you told me. I’m not convinced she’ll believe it if it comes from Gabe.’

‘Mia, Lexi’s telling you the truth. Gabe
never
cheated on you. Lexi said you’d walked into a bar and had seen the four of us together? He’d only just landed early Saturday evening, he’d come back to try and convince you to go back with him to New York on the Sunday night, once he’d apologised to you. Sarah and I had gone to pick him up from the airport, but he wanted a drink to discuss how he was going to handle the conversation with you, because he knew he’d fucked up by leaving it so long. He was so worried that you wouldn’t accept his apology. Then bloody Chelsea wandered over. She was in there having a drink with some friends and saw us. He wasn’t with her, she obviously took advantage of the situation when she saw you, and tried to make you think they were together.’

‘But I saw her …’

‘Mia, zip it,’ interrupted Lexi with a smack to the back of my head and I scowled at her. ‘Let him finish.’

‘We didn’t know until last night about the whole misunderstanding with Chelsea being in your apartment the next morning either.’ I rolled my eyes and Lexi smacked me again. ‘Gabe was
hammered
on that Saturday night and I didn’t want him to come and see you like that. Chelsea had gone off with her friends and I’d sent Sarah home to leave me to talk to Gabe on my own. Gabe was so drunk that I was having trouble trying to carry him out on my own, then bloody Chelsea turns up again. She’s like heat seeking missile when it comes to Gabe’s location. Anyway, she offered to help me get him home. We put him to bed and stayed to keep watch over him. Chelsea told me that she was still in love with him and I spent all night trying to convince her that she needed to move on, that Gabe didn’t feel that way about her, that he was still in love you.’ Doug paused for a breath and I shot a quick look at Gabe who gave me a sad smile.

‘Hear him out Mia, please,’ he advised. ‘It’s all true, I’ve never felt that way about her, I never could.’

‘So,’ continued Doug. ‘By the time Gabe was awake, Chelsea had been for a shower and went to make coffee for us. I had one and went to get dried off and changed in the bedroom while Gabe was having his. We had no idea, until Lexi told us, that you’d even been at the door and seen her there. Gabe said he’d come out of the bathroom into the kitchen and was surprised to see Chelsea shutting the front door with hardly any clothes on. He didn’t even remember her helping him home so was really shocked to find her in the apartment, let alone dressed like that. I heard them arguing and stepped out wondering what the hell was going on, to find Chelsea pulling on her skirt and storming out. We know now what must have happened. Lexi said you sent Gabe a text saying that you wanted to talk, that you still loved him and wanted to work it out. He never saw it and he never replied. I’d left his phone was on the hall table. Chelsea obviously saw an opportunity to get you over, pulled off her skirt and answered the door, knowing we wouldn’t be coming out any time soon. She knew how it would look and hoped it would drive you away and it worked. The texts that caused this whole misunderstanding weren’t even on Gabe’s phone when we checked it this morning, she must have deleted them.’

‘Is this really true?’ I whispered as I looked at Gabe. All this time I’d thought he was cheating on me and it seemed he wasn’t?

‘Yes,’ he nodded. ‘I promise Mia, I never slept with her, I never slept with anyone else, I couldn’t, not when I was still in love with you. I came straight to see you that day, after I’d had something to eat and some coffees to try and sober up, but no one was home. I rang and rang but you weren’t answering your phone. Then you sent me that text, saying you’d got the message that I was over you and not to contact you. I was so confused. I kept ringing you all day, but I had to go back to New York that night. I was gutted and I couldn’t get back here for a week and a bit, but I rang you, multiple times a day and you never answered.’

‘I turned my phone off and got a new one to avoid you,’ I whispered.

‘Well, that explains that. I came home on the Friday afternoon and no one was in again, you weren’t answering, obviously. Lexi was ignoring my calls too, I was going out of my mind. Then your mum rings me to tell me that you’re there, that you’re … that you were going on a date with
him.
I drove straight there to wait for you. I was devastated Mia, everything you said that night makes sense now. You thought I’d slept with Chelsea and you were trying to hurt me back. I spent all of Saturday drinking at home, then when Doug rang me last night to say you’d turned up in the club with him, I lost it.’

‘You really never cheated on me?’ I asked with tears in my eyes.

‘Never,’ he replied firmly. ‘Mia, I came today to see if we can salvage our relationship. But I promise you that no matter what happens with us, I’m done with Chelsea. I’ll be visiting her later with a legal document that my firm’s drawn up, that will ensure she never comes near you or me ever again. No form of contact whatsoever.’

‘O God,’ I groaned and put my head in my hands.

‘This is good Mia, you never cheated on Gabe, Gabe never cheated on you and he’s already apologised for the hurtful things he said to you. Plus, he’s accepted that he was unreasonable over the IVF deal and waiting so long to apologise,
and
he’s willing to try the surrogacy route when you feel ready. You guys can get back on track. I know I was down on him, but I really believed he’d cheated on you too. I knew that would eat you up forever if you went back to him, it would always be in the back of your mind. So this is good, right?’

‘No, no,’ I uttered. ‘It makes everything a
hundred
times worse.’ I stood up, ignoring the confused looks on their faces and ran out of the room and threw myself onto my bed, feeling sick and disgusted with myself. I’d doubted him, doubted his love for me after just a few weeks? I heard the door close and sobbed as I felt a hand on my shoulder, I’d know his touch anywhere. ‘Please don’t come near me,’ I moaned. ‘I’m tainted. I hate myself.’

‘Why Mia? Neither of us cheated and we both still love each other. We can get through this,’ he said in a reassuring voice. I scrambled up and looked at him horrified.

‘
I
cheated, Gabe. I was so angry at you that I let myself be comforted by another man. Four weeks after I walked out of our house,
I kissed him
. Only for a second, but I hated you so much in that moment that I kissed him. He made me feel so much better about myself over these last few weeks, I felt so low thinking that you preferred Chelsea over me. Is that the sort of wife you want? One that justified her actions, of ignoring you and enjoying another man’s company, based on a lie? A wife that was prepared to doubt your love for me so quickly?’

‘Don’t do this, I pushed you into his arms, Mia. I took too long to realise that you were more important to me than any baby you might be able to give me. It shouldn’t have taken me a couple of weeks to realise that. I let you down so badly, I left you thinking that I blamed you for the loss of our baby and that I didn’t want you. I drove you to seek comfort with someone else. You also thought that I’d slept with Chelsea, someone who’s had it out for you, for our relationship, from the start and I refused to see reason with that too. She manipulated us to drive us further apart. I don’t hold any grudges, I promise. You needed someone and I wasn’t there for you.’

‘He told me that he was falling in love with me,’ I whispered, feeling so ashamed.

‘I can see that. Why wouldn’t he? I love you, Mia. I never stopped, not for a second. You know, I always thought that if I found out that you’d slept with another man it would stop me loving you, instantly. I found out that it didn’t. It made me realise how badly I’d let you down to drive you to do something like that, because I knew how much you loved me once too. I was disgusted with myself that I’d turned into the kind of man that would make his wife turn away from him so quickly. You have no idea how relieved I was this morning when Lexi told me that it wasn’t true.’

‘You really don’t hate me?’ I exclaimed.

‘Never,’ he smiled, as he reached out and tucked my hair behind my ear. ‘Every time I left you a message I told you that I loved you and that I was sorry. I even begged you to forgive me while I cried during some of them. You just never heard any of them.’

‘I was so devastated that I hadn’t heard from you those first two weeks. Then seeing her with you when I thought you were still in New York, then finding her in our apartment the next morning… That was just
horrendous
, I’d never hurt so much. She convinced me that you were together and that you hated me because I couldn’t give you a child.’

‘Why didn’t you say something when I turned up at your mum’s on Friday?’ he sighed. ‘Or even given me one of your famous slaps?’ He raised his eyebrows as he smiled at me. I giggled as I wiped some stray tears from my face.

‘I was so upset, Gabe. I couldn’t bear hearing you say the actual words to me that you’d moved on, that you were with her. I hated her
so much
, the thought of the two of you together was just … I never wanted to hear the actual words come from your mouth, that would have been too painful.’

‘I’m so sorry, Mia. This is all my fault. If I hadn’t pushed so hard about making you try the IVF again, we’d never have gone through all of this.’

‘Well, we did and here we are. We both made horrible mistakes, Gabe. I’m just not sure where that leaves us. What does this all mean?’

‘Well, I know it’s been a month, but I’m pretty sure that we can agree that we’re still married and that both of us still love each other, can’t we?’ He ran a hand through his hair as he chewed on his bottom lip nervously.

‘Yes,’ I whispered with a nod.

‘Well, I’d say that’s a pretty good start. You’ve apologised for Tyler and trying to push me away. Now I need to apologise for why it took me so long to realise how misguided I was with wanting you to carry a pregnancy to full term yourself.’