Authors: Danielle Q. Lee
Placing an elongated wand on my stomach, over the location of my uterus, the lab tech slid the apparatus around with no obvious pattern.
Both men watched a monitor turned just out of my line of vision. I knew it had been moved so I couldn’t see—which really pissed me off.
I wanted to see
her
. I wanted to see her tiny hands and feet. Her heartbeat.
Watching the monitor, the two men’s faces were steady and concentrated. I couldn’t read anything beyond vague interest. There was the occasional mumble and odd pointing of fingers when they’d notice something on the screen, but other than that, I was bored.
Closing my eyes, I settled back and just enjoyed being somewhere other than my cell. It was rather relaxing laying there on the table. I felt myself nod off slightly. Pregnancy, combined with an illness, had definitely taken a toll on me.
Just as I drifted off, I was awakened by Agent Evans’ gasp.
“What?! What is it?! Is my baby okay?!” Panic swept through my body as I sat up on the examining table and clutched my stomach.
“It’s nothing. Lie back.” The lab technician pushed me down forcefully by the shoulder. I caught a subtle unspoken exchange between the two men as they looked seriously at one another.
Nothing my ass!
Anger and fear enveloped me as tears began flowing from my eyes.
How dare they keep anything wrong from me!
Shaking, worry for my baby’s well-being overwhelmed me. What if something was wrong? What if this deformed DNA of mine was a genetic death sentence for my baby?
I didn’t know if my mind could handle this. I was already on the verge of a breakdown from all the other atrocities I’d experienced over the last few months of my life. I couldn’t deal with the loss or malformation of my baby as well. She was the only person I could trust in this new and unstable world.
I could hear a lot of mumbled exchanges between the two men. Quieting myself, I strained my ears to decipher anything I could.
“Eighteen weeks?” Agent Evans asked with a hushed voice and the lab technician nodded in reply.
Eighteen weeks!
I was further along than I thought. That still didn’t confirm who the father was though; I’d been raped by Meyers only about a week after I had sex with Keanu.
Depressed that I couldn’t see the image of my baby and that I didn’t have confirmation of who her daddy was, I closed my eyes and blocked out the world.
Besides, I had a lot more important things to think about—like how I was going to get us out of here.
***
The white door to my cell sealed with an audible click. Moving quickly, I lunged to the cot and immediately stuck my hand underneath. Feeling around for the note, I panicked for a second when I couldn’t find it. Lowering myself further, I turned my head and scanned the underside of the bed.
I blew out a breath of relief when I saw it tucked neatly in the place where I’d left it.
Endeavoring to shove my fingers between the coils, I realized that retrieving it was going to be harder than I thought. Lying on my back, I positioned myself just under the location of the note.
Squeezing my hand between the bed frame and metalwork; I then tried to grab the note with my pointer and middle fingers pressed together. Slowly and carefully, I attempted again and again to pull the note to freedom. Painstakingly, I managed to maneuver it a couple of inches.
Hearing a tear as I moved the delicate paper note through the labyrinth of metal lattice, I paused and tried moving it more slowly. Only a few more inches and it would reach the edge of the bed frame. Shimmying the note back and forth for another minute, the end finally poked its nose out the side of the bed.
God! And I was worried someone would steal it!
As I unfolded the letter once again, a wave of nervousness washed through my stomach. Straightening out the wrinkled paper, I started reading.
Cassia, flush this as soon as you’re done reading it!
Follow this note to the letter…I can’t leave you and the baby to suffer any longer. Besides, they have plans for you after the baby is born…and it’s not good.
Tears welled and dripped softly through my lashes as I continued.
Tomorrow, when they take you for your shower, use the stall farthest from the door and look up at the showerhead, I’ll have left you something there. Use it to disable the guard. Drag the guard into the shower stall and close the door. Make sure to take the item with you, then hide in the janitorial closet that we used before. Stay there and be quiet. I’ll come get you when it’s safe.
Be careful.
And Cassia, I love you.
Gripping the note with both hands, I re-read it over and over in disbelief. I didn’t know which part I was happiest about, the fact that I was getting out of here or that Keanu loved me. Tears of joy ran down my face as I clutched the note, readying myself to rip it up and flush it down the toilet. Standing over the bowl, I held the note at the top, preparing to tear into two pieces, then four…
Frozen in mid-air, I tried to pull the letter apart. My eyes lingered on the last phrase and I realized how much it meant to me—and how much I wanted to keep that letter.
Chapter 11
After supper was delivered that night, I curled up on my little cot and waited impatiently for the next morning. Sleep eluded me for hours as Keanu’s plan replayed over and over in my mind. His idea was certainly a lot better than the one I had hatched only the day before.
Mine entailed breaking the mirror in my cell and hiding it in my jumpsuit. Once I got to the showers, I was going to cut my thigh, near my groin, and pretend like I was having a miscarriage. Upon calling the guard for help, I would stab the poor man and then make my getaway.
In hindsight, I’m not entirely sure I could’ve gone through with it, both the idea of cutting myself and possibly killing another human being just didn’t feel like my style. Not to mention, where was I going to escape to? I still had the acres of nowhere to deal with.
I wonder what Keanu has hidden in the shower?
I hoped it wasn’t a knife or gun, I wasn’t sure I could live with myself if I took someone’s life, even if it was essential for our escape.
Escape.
Daydreaming, I thought back to the moment the door swung open when I tried to flee with Jessica. Remembering the way the sunlight cascaded onto my face and how the wind ran its invisible fingers through my hair made me long for the outside world even more. Even the scent of the gasoline that hung in the air from the vehicles on the army base elicited an ache in my heart as I pined for freedom.
A tiny kick from inside my womb reminded me how important tomorrow was.
Soon, little one, soon. I won’t let them hurt you.
Closing my eyes, I let a wave of unconsciousness lull my weary soul to sleep.
Tomorrow.
My lips twitched into a smile as I drifted off.
***
The dream, which had been so consistent all my life, was suddenly unrecognizable. The golden ocean of sand that had always lay before me as my nemesis had transformed to a sea of white. Millions of crystalline shards of snow glinted and gleamed by the light of a lessened sun.
The sun.
The once colossal source of heat which had blazed within my dreams had retreated into the black fabric of space, leaving a bitterly cold and unforgiving landscape of ice to dwell below.
My bare feet burned with the bite of frost rather than the sting of hot sand as I shuffled through the frigid terrain.
Standing statuesque amidst the backdrop of white, scores of cacti bravely held their ground, their posed limbs surely appalled at the snow resting upon their shoulders.
Still in a thin gown of white cotton, I could feel my body shutting down as hypothermia assaulted me. With the last light of day glimpsing over the horizon and the haze of snowfall raining before me, I surrendered.
Falling to my knees and laying upon a bed of snowflakes, I closed my eyes and waited for the icy hand of death to still my beating heart. Fresh fallen snow descended onto my naked arms like tiny crystal butterflies, only to shatter and dissolve the moment they landed. A biting wind snaked around me as it whipped minuscule shards of ice into my face and eyes.
Sensing a presence around me, I forced my head up. I blinked and squinted as snowflakes landed on my lashes. Shielding my face with my hand, I looked out into the blizzard and saw movement. A shadowy figure, dressed in a hooded parka and snowshoes, moved swiftly toward me. The crunch of the snowshoes surrounded me as the figure reached my side.
“Cassia.” A familiar male voice whispered as he knelt beside my half-frozen body.
Wrapping me in a brown, wool blanket, he lifted me up. He walked with me cradled in his arms for what felt like miles. Pressed against his chest, I felt a comfort that I’d never known. Protected. Safe.
Feeling him slow to a stop, I somehow knew we’d reached our destination.
Peeking out from the side of the blanket, I beheld the familiar sight of the cave. Carrying me in, we were greeted by an already roaring bonfire. Placing me in front of the fire, I shivered uncontrollably as I thrust my frozen hands toward the blaze. Even though they stung terribly from the thaw, I welcomed the heat with open arms.
The man sat on the other side of the fire, only his eyes visible from beneath the fur-lined hood of his parka. His brown eyes glinted from the waving flames of the fire as he stared at me. A kindness dwelt behind the windows of his soul.
Somehow, through some unspoken exchange, I knew this man loved me. Raising his hands to his head, he began to pull the hood away from his face.
Just as the fur lining moved past the frame of his face, I felt my consciousness stirring.
No!
I cried out in my dream as the image of his face blurred and I was thrust back into the reality of my cell. As lucidity flooded back into my system, I cursed the timing of my awakening.
Rubbing my eyes and stretching, I felt the odd sensation of being watched.
It was then I realized—I was not alone.
“I’m sorry…I thought you were gone for a shower. I’ll come back later.” The woman dressed in a maid’s uniform uttered as she turned, dragging her mop and bucket on wheels behind her.
“Hey wait, who are you?” Sitting up on the cot, my interest piqued as I looked at the unfamiliar face.
I had noticed that every time I’d come back from having a shower that my cell had been cleaned. The floor, toilet and sink were always sparkling and my sheets had been changed. I guess it never occurred to me to wonder exactly who was doing this. It makes sense that even
they
would have a cleaning staff of potentially harmless people.
Noting her hesitation, I decided to go first.
“I’m Cassia.” Rising from the cot, I extended my hand in greeting. Her dark brown eyes shifted warily from my face to my hand. It was apparent she knew about me and my weird blood. Or maybe all the prisoners here were odd in some way and she had just learned to keep her distance.
“I…have to go.” Clutching the wooden handle of her mop nervously, she turned to leave.
“Please,” I pleaded, “I need to know something. Please.” Keeping my voice steady, I only wanted to know one thing from this woman who walked freely through the facility. Pausing at the open door, she looked up.
“What?”
“The little girl. Jessica. Is she…okay?” I wholeheartedly expected her to respond with good news. Hopefully, the little girl was just fine or, even better, released and allowed to live a normal life.
The woman’s paled expression, however, dampened my expectations.
“I’m not allowed to talk about…things that go on here.” She turned and moved quickly out the door. Lunging for the door before it slammed shut, I managed to get my fingers caught before it closed.
“Please! I just want to know if she’s okay!” I screamed as I tried to pry the door open. Someone on the other side smashed the protruding tips of my fingers with something hard. Shrieking in pain, I instinctively pulled my fingers away and held them to my chest. Throbbing and swelling, I thought for a moment that a couple of them were broken.
Jessica. What did they do to you?
Tears ran down my face as I pictured the beautiful little girl with the ocean blue eyes. I laid my hands protectively over my stomach as I realized my baby’s potential future.
I have to get you out of here.
I hoped with all my heart that Keanu’s plan would work, otherwise, I was going to go with Plan B.
If we don’t escape today, sweet baby, mommy will make it so they can’t hurt either of us.
Chapter 12
Leaving the safety of my cell, I followed the guard down the hall to the showers. The hallway seemed much longer than usual today; probably because it was the last time I was ever going to see it, at least, I hoped it was.
With my head hung and my heart heavy, I walked the last mile of this nightmare. One way or another, it was going to end today. The only thing left to be determined was whether it was going to be a happy ending or a tragedy.
Images of my loved ones flashed through my mind. My grandmother, Amy and Keanu. Not a very large number of important people in my life, I realized.
There were so many things I wanted to do with my life. So many unrealized dreams.
The prospect of archeology seemed so far away from me now, and honestly, quite trivial considering all of the other missed opportunities in my life.
Travelling the world. Marriage. Buying a house. Raising my baby in a happy, safe environment. Hearing her first cry, her first words and the moment she teetered with her first step, I was going to miss it all. I’d be lucky to even see her once in my life let alone care for her until she was an adult.