Innocent Lies (22 page)

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Authors: J.W. Phillips

Tags: #adult abuse, #adult abuse recovery love, #romance adult contemporary, #adult and contemporary romance

BOOK: Innocent Lies
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“As long as daddy is happy, Lydia
is thrilled. She was a daddy’s girl from the word go. Plus, Helen
changed Dad. She mellowed him out and made him a better man. She is
even great with the rest of this fucked up family.”

 

“Why would she want your
dad?”

 

“Love, baby.” He held out his hand
as if that was an obvious conclusion. “Helen gave up a lot to be
with my dad. My little brother comes with a big commitment, too.
Are you ready for that?” He raised an eyebrow. “Well, are you? It’s
a simple question.”

 


It’s not a simple answer.” I adjusted my dress to avoid his
stare.

 

“If you love him, you will learn to
love the business.” A hint of a smile played on his lips. “That
fucked-up face he’s sporting won’t be the last one.”

 

I raised my left
eyebrow.
Who the hell does he
think he is? I realize what kind of business the family
runs.
“I do love him and I
understand the business as well as anybody. I spent four days in
hell because of it.” I stood up and started to the door.

 

“Dylan, I’m sorry for what you
lived through. To be honest, I was ready to kill Jamie after you
got through testifying in court.” He gripped my arm and stroked the
underside with his thumb. “I like what you’re doing to E. He has
always been a spoiled brat. My daddy’s prince. You make him a
better man.”

 


What am I supposed to do?” I looked at the door hoping
Ethan would run through it,
soon
.

 

“You will need to learn everything
is not always black and white and accept things in shades of gray.
Don’t let Ethan sugar coat the truth. My little piece of advice,
Ethan gives you the truth or he gets no pussy. Don’t ever let him
keep secrets.”

 

Ethan barged through the door. I
fisted his shirt in my hands, jerking him to me. “Your five minutes
are up.” Ethan informed Charlie.

 

Charlie stood up, but before
leaving he reached over to ruffle my hair. “Ethan, take care of
this one. She’s good for you.”

 

Ethan clutched my chin, pushing it
up to give him full access to my neck. He glided his mouth down my
skin softly but urgently, sucking and nipping to the base of my
throat.

 

“Ethan, you live a
life I’ll never understand” I twisted the scraps of material
covering his stomach muscles in my hand.

 

“I’ve always been up front that I’m
not a good guy, since you learned about my past you know my family
is dangerous. Hell, look at my damn face you weren't even shocked
just upset that I was hurt.”

 

“Do you agree with everything your
father does?”

 

“No babe, I don’t.” He shrugged his
shoulder. “It’s all I know.”

 

“I want to be a teacher to help
kids avoid all the crap your family thrives on. I can’t understand
how the life you live and the life I want to live will ever
combine.”

 

He inhaled deeply and shook. “You
need to trust me. I heard what my brother told you.”

 

“Awe, the no pussy thing.” I
smiled.

 

He shook his forehead against my
temple. “The no you thing. I won’t lose you again. No secrets ever,
Privy. I can be what you need. Let me be.”

 

“E, am I really enough?”

 

“Do you have any fucking idea how
many women I have screwed?”

 

I shook my head. I didn’t want to
think about it either.

 

“I don’t either. Hundreds, hell, I
don’t know a lot. The only one that ever meant crap to me was you.
Shit, I enjoyed the beatings as much as the fucking, but with you
all I want to do is please.”

 

I laid my cheek against his chest.
“Why are you telling me this?”

 

“You ruined me. When I’m inside
anyone the only face I’ve been able to see the last five years is
yours. I don’t have a clue what happened between us out in that
field, but I do know that you crawled under my skin and buried
yourself in my fucking heart. I’ll be damned if I let you go
without a fight.”

 

“I’m not leaving.”

 

“I know. I won’t
let you.” Ethan brought his mouth to mine and soon I was lost in
his kiss. He cradled my head with his hands, his tongue worshiping
my mouth. I got a sense he was expressing his desperation and
desire for us to be one.

 

The same day, three hours
later

 

John was pretty persuasive about
the game of football. It didn’t matter that it was freezing
outside. We put on hoodies and gathered into the oversized backyard
for a game of touch football. It was odd to see Lydia and even Neal
lose a little of their seriousness and join in. Damn, Ethan’s
family was competitive and it was no secret that my lack of skills
and Ethan’s bummed leg made us the weaker link.

 

“E, I hope you don’t plan on having
kids with this lady. Shit, they would stink at ball.” Charlie said
and tossed the ball in my direction.

 

I did my own version of the Super
Bowl Shuffle when I caught it. Ethan gripped me around the waist
and playfully tackled me to the ground. He was hurting. Even behind
the plastered smile, I could see the pain in his eyes. I stroked
his face. Man, I loved him with everything in me. He leaned in to
kiss me.

 

“Get a room, Uncle
E.” John yelled over at us. Ethan growled in response then preceded
to kiss me. I squirmed in his arms and in his unearthly speed, he
had my arms pinned behind my back and started to kiss down my
neck.

 

“I could get you a
suite at the Dungeon.” Charlie chimed in. I didn’t understand what
he was talking about, but it sent Ethan on edge. Flames darted from
his eyes. I looked over at Charlie that was holding his arms out in
the air. Glancing at us with a look of mocked innocence, he flashed
an almost indiscernible smile. Ethan jerked the football up and
chucked it at Charlie’s nose. It bounced off his face followed by a
spew of blood.

 

“What the hell?”
Charlie pinched his nose causing him to flinch.

 

Kristina was at Charlie’s side
trying to clean him up. “Ethan Phillip, what is your
problem?”

 

Ethan grabbed my hand and hauled
me into the house. Once inside, he started kissing me and backed me
into the kitchen counter. “What was that about?” I asked once Ethan
let up on my mouth.

 

“Charlie needed to be put in his
place. He has been an ass all day.”

 

“I’m being an ass?” We both snapped
our head around to see Kristina dragging Charlie in. “I really like
Dylan, but if you haven’t already you really need to carry her to
the Dungeon and work off some of that . . .”

 

“Shut the fuck up
about the club.” Ethan screamed and shook his hands in the air
before Charlie got through with his spill.

 

What the hell?
“What is the Dungeon?” I asked,
looking over at Charlie.

 

“Oh, hell no, ask little Blondie if
you want to know.” Charlie answered, pointing his finger over to
Ethan. “He was the one that paid to have you killed and breaks my
nose over mentioning OUR club.”

 

“Stop it, the both
of you.” Kristina said as she chucked the ice pack she was filling
up.

 

“E, what is he talking about?” My
voice rose and grew sharp as panic raced through me. I pushed him
away. “Fuck you!”

 

His arms encircled my waist and he
squeezed me next to his body hard enough to make my breathing
catch. “This is not the place.”

 

“Screw you, where is the
place?”

 

“Get ‘em girl,”
Charlie said.

 

Ethan froze. I took in his face
that glared at Charlie. I was not so sure that I was not about to
witness a blood bath. Neal walked in and looked at his two
sons.

 

“Ethan, you need a
breather. Charlie is the only brother you have left.” Neal said. It
was amazing how that man could send terror throughout the room
without even raising his voice. All I knew was that I wanted out of
there. Ethan must have felt the same way because he squeezed my
hand and pulled me to his truck fast enough to make me
lightheaded.

 

“It is time you
start running that damn mouth. What the hell was he talking about?”
I asked Ethan as he shoved me into the truck. He slammed the door
with such force it rattled the dashboard.

 

I watched as he
walked to the front of the truck and smacked the hood. He turned
and sat down on the bumper, pushing his fingers through his hair.
He mumbled a list of profanity I was glad I couldn’t exactly hear.
Minutes passed before he got up and joined me in the cab of the
truck. He didn’t speak or even acknowledge me. Tires spun as he
raced down the road. I felt like he had given me a swift kick in
the gut, and suddenly had tunnel vision. I was aware of the
billboards as we rushed by them, but all I could see were the
yellow lines running down the side of the road. I heard the hushed
sound of the radio. But it was no more than background noise. All I
could focus on were the words: our club and paid to have you
kill.
What the hell?

 

“For once, you better start
talking. No more excuses, I want the damn truth. What the hell was
Charlie talking about?”

 

“In a lot of ways
Charlie is more a father to me than my dad has ever been. He is the
one that introduced me to my lifestyle.” Ethan started speaking,
not yet completely placid.

 

“Lifestyle?”

 

“You know, tying up and beating the
shit out of horny and submissive females before I fuck
them.”

 

He was talking causing me to calm.
I had never thought of it as a lifestyle and didn’t like thinking
of Ethan being anything like Jamie. “You haven’t beat me,
yet.”

 

“I won’t either. Maybe, a few love
smacks,” he said and winked over at me. “You’re special. I won’t
hurt you . . . Charlie and I own some, okay fourteen, clubs called
The Dungeon. It’s a sex club, kind of like a country club for the
sexual freaks.”

 

Ethan’s a freak. That
owns a club were like minded females are readily available.
Will the secrets ever end?
“You are just now remembering
this?”

 

“I honestly haven’t thought about
it until Charlie said something. I won’t keep anything else from
you,” he stated gently.

 

“Do you go often?” My lip trembled
at the thought. I went numb.

 

“Shut up.” He slammed his hand on
the steering wheel. “Do you honestly believe I’ve gone since
you?”

 

The lump in the back of my throat
kept me from answering. I nodded my head and started to play with
the drawstring on my sweatshirt. I couldn’t bear the thought of
letting him see the sadness in my eyes.

 

“My love, I would never do that to
you. With you, I have it all. I will never risk losing us over
meaningless sex. This morning . . . every time with you has been
the best of my life.”

 

“I can’t do all that. I promise you
I’ll never let you hit me.” I was dazed and glanced up at Ethan’s
profile. Even with the swelling and marks, he still appeared too
perfect. Too perfect for me.

 

“I have no desire to hurt you. It’s
not what I need like some people. I just run a business that I’m
very good at.” He rubbed his forehead, frustrated. “I would say
I’ll carry you, but I won’t. I’ll never muddy your mind with a
place like that. Privy, I like to play, but will never dish out
more than you can handle.”

 

“Do you miss it?”

 

“Hell, no, it was empty and
inconsequential. Did I enjoy it? Yeah, a lot. I like having
complete control over someone. Bending their soul to meet my needs.
Enough of this shit.”

 

“I like your games, but I can’t
give someone complete control.”

 

“Babe, I don’t
want that with you. I’m sorry you had to hear about this shit when
we were with my family. Look at me.” He lifted my chin with the
side of his hand. “You. You are all I want. All I need.”

 

Ethan knew what they did to me. He
saw me laying in that field bloody and mangled. Yet, he expected me
to understand when he admitted to having a pastime of beating
women. I adjusted the jogging pants I was wearing and wondered if
it was bought with money made off the backs of mistreating women.
“You really are the big bad wolf.”

 

“Come here, little piggy” He shoved
the armrest back and tugged me over beside him. “Babe, I have never
once done anything that they did not want. They enjoyed it as much
or more than I ever did. I’m not Jamie.”

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