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Authors: C. S. Lakin

BOOK: Innocent Little Crimes
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After a moment, Lila spoke. “Peter, get some
candles. That will set the mood perfectly.”

Peter returned from the kitchen with two
glimmering candlesticks that created an eerie illumination. The
faces on the benches glowed in the dim light. Outside, branches
rubbed against the stone walls, screeching like nails across a
blackboard. Dick let out another howl.

“Cut it out, Dick,” Della said. She lit
another cigarette off the butt she held.

“Where was I?” Lila asked, reaching for the
drink she’d left on the sofa table. After taking a long sip, she
set the glass on the floor. “Peter, bring a few bottles over here.
It’s going to be an arduous ride to the border.”

“Do you want me to play or what?”

“Just do it. Then you can sit down again.
Now, where was I?”

“The sound of wolves,” Dick said.

Lila knocked her glass over with her foot.
Alcohol seeped into the carpeting, but she ignored it and continued
her Russian-tinged oratory. “The bad news is, if they catch us,
we’ll be devoured. The good news is we are only a short distance
from the border, and safety.”

“This whole thing is asinine,” Davis
said.

“I think it’s great,” Dick said.

Della snorted. “You would.”

Lila cleared her throat and spoke louder.
“Some of us must get out to lighten the load. But, to get out is to
die in the cold snows of Siberia. So, who is to be thrown out?”

Cynthia got up off the bench. “Me. I’ll be
first. I’ll be a willing sacrifice so you can all survive.”

Lila shook her head. “No volunteers
allowed.”

“Why not?”

“That would make the game too easy.”

Davis reached for her arm and pulled her back
down. “Come on, hon, let’s play it right.”

“This must be played like it’s a matter of
life and death,” Lila said.

“Life and death, huh?” Dick asked. “No holds
barred?”

“No holds barred.”

Millie wriggled on the hard bench. “I don’t
get it.”

“I think the idea is we have to vote out
those who must die. One by one,” Jonathan said.

“You got it,” said Lila. “The burden of proof
falls on each of us to show cause as to why he or she shouldn’t be
chosen.”

“Does anyone make it to the border?” Dick
asked.

“Only one, Ferrol. Only the survivor. And he
or she wins the game. And the prize.”

Dick leaned closer. “Which is?”

Lila hesitated for a moment, savoring the
tension in the room. “The necklace. The one your sweet wife is
wearing around her neck.”

They all turned to stare at Millie.

Della gasped. “It must be worth a
fortune.”

“Six figures, if you want a ballpark
estimate. High stakes that could bail one of you out of your
unfortunate predicaments. And for those of you—” She waved a hand
at Davis and Cynthia. “—who don’t need the money, why, you could
give it to the charity of your choice. Whatever.” Lila noticed a
distinct change in mood as her guests pondered the
possibilities.

Jonathan looked at the intense expressions
around him. Now they would take this game seriously. Greed—the
ultimate motivator. “Killers and victims, is that it?”

“You bet. Be a wolf or get thrown to the
wolves—it’s your choice. Okay, everybody, let’s do it for
real.”

“On Dancer, on Prancer, on Vixen. Mush.” Dick
said.

“No more jokes,” Lila said, “life or death
now.”

Della blew smoke at the ceiling. “Just like
‘The Deadly Game.’ ”

“Why, yes, Della.” Lila scrunched her
eyebrows in thought. “Oh, yeah, remember this line? ‘In this world
of ours, no one is completely innocent. Each of us carries some
burden of guilt which troubles him and fills him with
self-loathing.’ So, come now, we’re all on trial here. Who wants to
try to prove their innocence?”

Lila held her arms out in invitation. “Well,
if not your own innocence, then who has something mean and rotten
to say about someone else? Here’s your chance to be vindictive,
take care of all that unfinished business. Clear the air. Remember,
your only other option is to be thrown to the wolves.”

“There’s no one in this room who’s a perfect
angel. We’ve all done lousy things we’d rather forget,” Della
said.

“Right,” Davis added. “Remember Mr. Trapps in
‘The Deadly Game’? His attorney, played by me,” —he smiled at
Cynthia— “defended him, saying, ‘His behavior is mean—granted.
Selfish—granted. Ignoble—granted. But human, gentlemen . . . and
therefore worthy of our pity, our compassion our forgiveness. For
what is life, after all, but a chaotic battlefield in which we more
or less contribute every day to the murder of our fellow
citizens—while they are just as industriously murdering us.’ ”

“Bravo,” Lila said. “All those innocent
little crimes just keep adding up, don’t they? Meaning, we’re all a
bunch of mean, selfish murderers. So, who’ll cast the first
stone?”

“Then, I elect Lila—for coming up with this
lousy game,” said Della.

Lila scowled. “Nice try, but not good enough.
Pass me the Jack Daniels, Peter.” Peter, straddled in front of
Lila, reached down and picked the bottle up from the floor.

Lila scanned faces. “Now—who gets roasted
first?”

“Hey,” said Della, “who let
you
off the hook? I already picked
you.”

Jonathan ignored Della. “What was that little
comment you made about Dick at dinner?” “About his faithful
wife.”

“Hey, I’ve already been roasted enough
tonight. Start with someone else. What about you, Levin? You’ve
been through three wives.”

“And probably doesn’t even remember their
names,” Della said.

“Shut up, Della.”

“Why should I? We’re supposed to be proving
how unworthy everyone else is. You’re easy. You’ve slept your way
through one producer’s daughter after another to get where you are
today.”

“And you haven’t slept your way from one pit
stop to the next?” How dare she criticize him?

Della tossed her head and stared at the
ceiling. “Sleeping around isn’t a serious enough sin to get thrown
to the wolves. Everybody does it.”

“That’s right,” Dick said. Jonathan caught a
flicker of fury on Millie’s face, but she clamped her mouth shut
and said nothing.

“What counts is who you hurt along the way,”
Della added.

Lila nodded. “Della’s right. Sex isn’t
weighty enough a sin—unless of course, there’s been deceit as
well.” She shot Dick a stern look.

Dick wriggled on the bench and Jonathan
suppressed a chuckle.

Dick looked like he had ants in his pants.
“Why don’t we talk about something more pertinent, like our
careers? If you’re going to prove your worth, then you gotta show
you’re doing something productive with your life. Like what I
do—helping my community, and trying to clean up the environment.
And it’s not like I do it selfishly, for the money. I get pittance
for all the long hours I put in.”

“Well, since you’re so willing to put
yourself on the stand, Ferrol, let’s talk about your aspiration to
be state senator. That’s quite a noble goal,” Lila said. “So, what
happened to your dream of holding a state office, Dick?”

“I’m still pushing for it. It’s just a matter
of—”

“—
Conspiracy to commit fraud? Serious
charges, Ferrol. Did you even stop and consider the risk when
Matson whispered his slimy plan? Or was a measly thirty thou so
tempting you were willing to jeopardize your whole
career?”

Dick jumped to his feet. “I don’t know what
you’re implying, but it wasn’t anything like that.” He felt around
his pocket. “Damn. Millie, go look in my coat pocket for the
Rolaids, will you?” Millie rose obediently, but Lila motioned her
to sit.

“No one leaves the room until the game’s
over. You might miss something.”

“I have to use the bathroom,” Della said.

“Hold it in.”

“What is this—torture camp?” Davis asked.

“You get off the bench, you’re dinner for the
wolves.” Lila glared at Dick and he huffed as he sat back down.

 

 

Millie tugged at the fabric pinching her
waist. The necklace hung heavily around her neck. Like a noose. A
black haze clouded her vision and her head spun. Maybe the dress
was cutting off the oxygen to her brain. Why wouldn’t Lila let her
change her clothes?

All these accusations tumbled in her brain.
Who was Matson and what was this thirty thousand Lila was talking
about? How in the world did Lila know more about her husband’s
activities than she?

Lila leaned across the littered carpeting and
inched up to Millie’s face. “And Millie, what do you have to say?
You’ve been so quiet this weekend. Ah, your way of avoiding
confrontation. You think it keeps you from culpability when there’s
trouble, don’t you? Did you stand quietly by while your husband
fixed the bids on the community center, or did he forget to tell
you about that? Maybe he forgot to tell you about all that money
and where he stashed it away, hmmm? Or…” Lila paused for effect.
“Who he spent it on.”

Millie looked at Dick, whose face turned
rigid and pale. She knew he had been up to something but had no
idea it was this serious. What if Dick really had broken the law?
What if he goes to jail? It hurt to hear Lila criticize her, but
her remarks had hit home. She knew, deep in her heart, her fear of
confrontation was her greatest fault—her inability to speak up, to
speak her mind. That reluctance had cost her her friendship with
Lila in college and now seemed at the crux of her failing marriage.
All these years, she let the rumors go in one ear and out the
other. How much easier to turn her head than to uncover something
terrible. But she did it for her girls. To protect them from being
hurt. More than anything else, she wanted them to have a safe,
carefree life so they could grow up happy and secure.

She had to say something.

“I’m sure whatever Dick did, he did out of
necessity.”

Lila laughed with such condescension, Millie
wanted to crawl under the bench.

“If you knew the truth, Mil, you wouldn’t
bother defending him.” The others listened intently. Maybe crawling
under the bench wasn’t such a bad idea.

Lila continued. “Yeah. It was necessity.
Penny has expensive tastes, right Ferrol? How much of that nest egg
have you already blown behind Millie’s back?”

Millie felt the blood leave her cheeks.
“Who’s Penny?”

“Go get him, tiger,” Lila said.

Cynthia stood up. “Excuse me.”

“Cynthia, come back.”

“This is hateful; I won’t be a part of
it.”

Lila held her arm, stopping her as she
attempted to pass. “Oh, but it’s my party and you’ll have to stay.
You’re my guest. It’s impolite to walk out.”

Cynthia turned to Davis for support.

“Cynthie, sit down. Be a sport,” Davis
said.

Cynthia sat back on the bench and
seethed.

“Well,” Lila said to Dick, “aren’t you going
to answer your faithful wife?”

“Lila, you don’t know what you’re talking
about.” Dick turned to Millie. “Penny works in the county clerk’s
office. She’s just an acquaintance.”

Lila unfolded a piece of paper she retrieved
from a hidden pocket. “Well, I see you’ve put some effort into
making her acquaintance.” She read from the sheet. “July 16th:
Travelodge, Tacoma. Real classy, Ferrol. I guess you were trying to
impress her. Room service: $54. A nice bottle of champagne,
perhaps? July 31st: Fairwinds Motel, August 5th: Happy Trails
Mountain Lodge in Olympic National Park. Let’s see—there’s Port
Angeles, Bremerton, Yakima, Tumwater. You two really get around,
don’t you?”

Dick jumped off the bench and ripped the
paper from Lila’s hand.

“Ooh,” Lila said. “Worked up about
nothing?”

“Lies, all lies. This is a sick attempt at
making me look bad. You’ve made it all up.”

“Now, why would I do a thing like that?”

Dick uttered a feeble laugh. “This is some
kind of test, right?”

“Whatever do you mean, Ferrol?”

Dick looked around at the faces watching,
waiting. Millie wouldn’t meet his gaze. “You guys don’t believe
this, do you? Millie, come on.”

Suddenly a dozen phone calls flitted through
Millie’s mind. Some special meeting of county supervisors hastily
called. Trouble with funding, requiring him to go to Seattle to
lobby for money. A committee inviting him to Port Angeles to speak
on his recycling efforts. Millie had never given those spontaneous
trips a second thought. How blind could she be?

But surprised? She searched her heart and
realized an affair made perfect sense. He hadn’t touched her for
months. She had never once considered the possibility of Dick’s
unfaithfulness. Just another thing she avoided seeing. If only the
floor would open up and swallow her.

“Throw him to the wolves,” Jonathan said.

Dick looked at the faces in the candle glow.
“It would have never happened if Millie wasn’t such a cold fish.
She made me do it.”

Millie gasped. He deceived her and now he
blamed her for it? “I made you lie? I made you steal? How can you
say such a thing?” Millie choked on the words. “I’ve broken my back
being a good wife to you—taking care of the house and raising the
girls. I’ve worked full-time to support us for years—”

“That’s not true! I’ve worked just as
hard.”

“Oh, Right. First it was that—mail-order
business. Aphrodisiac pills. And then it was the worm farm. One
failed business after another. And you used my money.”

“I couldn’t help it if those businesses
failed. Eighty percent of all businesses fail in the first
year.”

“But you wouldn’t ever take a ‘real’ job, huh
Ferrol?” Lila said. “And poor Millie had to struggle to keep you
afloat.”

“Look, Lila,” Dick said, “the truth is, I had
no intention of marrying her. Sure, she was cute in college. But
she purposely got pregnant to trap me, so what about that? And then
she took me back to her parents in Wisconsin, who cornered me.
There was no escape. But I did the right thing by her. I didn’t
abandon her, so that’s something.”

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