Inside Out (4 page)

“Come on, big boy. I’m tired of this place.” The tip of her tongue wet her lips.
“And
famished
.
Are you as
starved
as I am?”

Trey blinked. Had he stepped through the door to another universe? Was this the same Erica who had been far less than happy to see him the other day? If they stayed here a moment longer, he was going to kick the door shut and ravish her. He was too far gone to care if anyone heard them banging the walls.

But he sucked in his breath and tried to check his raging emotions. Erica might not wish to get canned. He really didn’t believe she wore G-strings or went
au
naturel
under her skirt—at work. Through his clenched teeth he managed to grind out, “What are you trying to do to me?”

Erica released his tie. Then she batted her lashes, unbuttoned the top three buttons on her blouse and fanned herself. “What do you mean?”

Trey itched to turn her over his knee and spank her cute little
tush
until she begged him to fuck her. His shirt was restricting his airway and he loosened his tie and undid his top button. “You know exactly what I mean. You might have lost your dick but not your brain.”

Erica giggled and Trey did his best not to roll his eyes. He felt more like a cave man than a gentleman but took his computer bag in his free hand and widened the door for her to precede him.

“Unless you want me to make love to you here, we’d best go somewhere private fast. My place okay?”

Erica bit her lip and hung back. “I shouldn’t have said those things. I don’t know what possessed me except I’ve missed you terribly.”

For the first time since their breakup, his heart didn’t feel like it was being crushed by heavy rocks.

He closed the door then he closed the distance between them. Cupping her face, he caressed it as he searched her eyes. “I’ve missed you, too. And I’d like to get way deep into you.”

Before she could answer, he crushed her against him and slipped his hands under her skirt. Then he spread his hands across her very bare buttocks.

Surprised and turned on, he groaned. Unable to help himself, he ground his swollen cock against her pussy.

She searched his face, her eyes bearing into his. “You didn’t believe me, did you?”

“No. I hope you only did it for me.” Before she could respond, he plundered her lips. He didn’t believe she’d spent the entire day that way—she had done this when she learned he was here.

She returned the kiss with fervour. Her tongue danced with his and her fingertips blazed a fiery trail down his back. Then she cupped his ass and squeezed. A moment later, she pulled away.

Without her support, he swayed for an instant. Breathless and crazy with desire, he blinked askance.

When she locked her office door and curled her finger at him, his cock jumped. “Are you sure? What if they hear us?”

She glanced down at her watch and a tremulous smile teased her lips. “It’s after five and I’m the only workaholic here. The place is all ours.”

His heart raced and he stepped forward. But a trace of reserve in her eyes stopped him. His gut clenched but he asked, “Is everything okay?”

After several moments’ hesitation, she said, “I haven’t been with a man since…”

Trey froze. Only his throat constricted. Finally, it unclogged and he asked, “What do you mean?”

Erica looked away, shuffled her feet and wrung her hands. When her gaze met his again, she said, “You.”

The wealth of emotion in her voice made his spine tingle—however, he didn’t want to examine any of this too closely. Not here. Not now.
Maybe not ever…
He sympathised that she had demons to deal with but he had his own to battle.

When he opened his mouth to speak, she raised her hand as if to stop him. “Before we go any further, there are some ground rules.”

“Ground rules?” Trey echoed, his veins beginning to ice over. He eyed the door, wondering if he should leave before this got too deep. “What do you mean?”

Erica cleared her throat a couple of times. “I’m all
woman
, inside and out. I’m not ready to put my heart out there for someone who wants something I can’t give.”

Perplexed, he tilted his head. “I don’t follow.”

She closed her eyes and shook her head. When she opened them, she said, “I mean
,
I’m not ready to have a relationship, especially not with a man who might want another man. I’m still coming to terms with all the changes in my life.”

Her words reverberated around in his head as he struggled with their import. He wasn’t ready to have a relationship with her, not after the way she’d
lied
, after the way she’d made their lives so miserable, no matter that his lips longed to devour hers. As the words circled a couple of times more around his mind, he took exception to the fact she thought a bi man would cheat on a beloved partner, man or woman. As they weren’t in a relationship and it was a moot point, he let it go without comment, however.

Afraid he’d made a huge mistake coming here, he turned towards the door. “I think it’s best if I go. I don’t think either of us thought this out. I didn’t think…”

A tear trickled down her cheek and she swiped at it with the back of her hand. “No, you didn’t, but neither did I. Maybe that’s the problem with us.”

Us.
His heart sank. There hadn’t been
an
us
in a very long time.

Although her face mirrored her valiant struggle to stop her tears, another one slid out the corner of her other eye. Then a strangled cry ripped from her throat and she spun on her heel, turning her back on him.

He couldn’t stand to see her cry. Reversing direction, he closed the gap separating them, turned her around and pulled her into his arms. Wishing he could ease her pain, he rubbed her back and murmured in her ear, “Shush. Everything will be okay.”

When he spoke, his lips brushed her ear and she snuggled against him. Her warmth seeped into him and his heart did that funny little flip-flop that hadn’t happened since the last time he’d been held in Eric’s arms. He cursed the feelings and wished them away. They no longer had a place in his life, not for the person who had turned his life so upside down.

Muffled, her voice drifted to him. “I was told this wouldn’t be easy, facing the world, standing up for myself. I thought being
myself
would be easier, though. But this sucks.”

He could only imagine how hard things must be. Being a gay—or even a bi—man wasn’t easy, either. He wondered how much harder being a transgender person could be. Not sure what to say, but feeling words of comfort were expected, he mumbled, “I’m sorry.”

She smiled up at him through her tears. Their gazes locked, her eyes darkened and her lips parted. Before he realised what she was up to, she slashed her lips across his.

Her lips, moist and salty with her tears, felt wet and warm. They caressed his a second time.
Then a third.
The sweet and salty taste made him want more but it was her body moulding to his that was impossible to resist.

She smoothed the flats of her hands inside his shirt and up his chest until one
laid
alongside his heart. Against his lips, she murmured seductively, “I’ve missed being close to a man. I really need to be close to you now. You can have your wicked way with me and no one else will ever know.”

He wasn’t so sure, but when she lifted her skirt over her waist and revealed her bare pussy, she consumed his thoughts. When she unbuttoned his slacks and pulled them down to his ankles, he almost came.

The earth quaked beneath them and he kicked off his shoes and slacks. Then he lifted off her blouse and fumbled with her bra. When the wispy piece of lace slithered to the floor, he gazed in amazement at her gorgeous breasts. His mouth watering, he murmured in a husky voice, “You’re absolutely beautiful. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear you were born a woman.”

Erica veiled her eyes for a moment, then gazed back at him. “I was. The doctors just brought out the real me.” She pirouetted and asked, “You really like?”

To his surprise, a primitive growl rumbled in his chest. In a raspy voice, he uttered, “I like very much.”

He couldn’t wait a moment longer to show her just how much he wanted her and took her in his arms. She fit perfectly against him as if they’d been moulded together. Paradise was his again.

She pressed her lips to his neck then blazed a trail of moist heat to his collarbone. Seductively, she wiggled against him as if trying to weave herself back into his heart. Her breasts were soft and plush and he couldn’t resist them a second longer. He buried his face between them and licked his way to one nipple and suckled it in rhythm with her moans.

She pushed his underwear down and released his cock. When his penis sprang forward, she curled her fingers around it and gently pumped. She moved her lips lightly across his forehead. “I always loved your cock. I’ve missed it very, very much.”

“I’ve missed you, too.” Emotions he’d mourned as dead and buried flooded him. Warmth chased away the bitter cold that had frozen them since he’d walked out on Eric. God, he’d missed his baby. Being in the right hadn’t warmed his empty nights.

As much as he hated to admit it even to himself, he’d missed her like hell, not merely their sizzling trysts. If only Eric hadn’t ruined everything…

Pain, raw and ragged, stabbed him. His breath caught in his throat and his knees wobbled. He felt as shaky, as confused and angry as he had every day during their last tumultuous year together
.

What in the hell am I doing?
Long ago he’d decided that she might own his heart but he was damned if she was going to destroy his soul. He had no concrete proof Erica was any better for him than Eric.

When she gently shoved him away from her, he sighed in relief, saying a silent thanks that she’d come to her senses instead of tying him in knots again. Before he regrouped enough to move away, however, she dropped to her knees before him and kissed the tip of his penis. While he was shuddering with delight, she took his cock deeper into her mouth.

Lost, he wound his fingers through her hair and imprisoned her face against his cock. He ground his hips against her as she deep throated him. She greedily milked him and delicious shudders overcame him. Before he could hold himself back, he came long and hard in her mouth.

Her fingernails gently raked his balls,
then
slid over the lower part of his shaft as she milked him dry.

Out of his mind with euphoria, he longed to see his cum glistening on Erica’s beautiful face, to taste their combined muskiness, so he pulled her up and lowered his lips to hers. He wrapped her in his arms and rocked her against him as he licked her lips clean.

When he finally caught his breath, he leant his forehead against hers and gazed deeply into her passion-glazed eyes. “I thought you wanted me in you so badly?”

“I do,” Erica huskily murmured. Once again, she caressed his cock. “But your cock was so delicious, I couldn’t resist a taste. Then one lick led to another… It’s been so long since we’ve been like this. I didn’t think we’d ever get back together.”

The catch in her voice was almost as much a wallop to Trey as her words. Were they
back
together
? He rewound their conversation but couldn’t recall a proposal of any kind. Not even a suggestion. Wishing and hoping things could go back to the way they
were was
one thing. Actually going back was another.

His throat constricting, he disentangled himself and moved several feet from the woman. Just because the sex had promised to be mind-shattering, he wasn’t ready to let Erica trample his heart the way Eric had. He didn’t know anything about Erica’s life now except that she still worked with computers, umpired and was a transgender woman.

Visions of her empty, reeking beer bottles made his nose scrunch. The memories were so strong he could smell the terrible stench. No matter how hot the attraction, he couldn’t get into a relationship with an alcoholic again.

He removed her hands from him and backed away. “Whoa! We’re not
back together
.”

Erica blinked hard. She wanted to kick herself for opening up to Trey and getting her heart smashed to bits again. Was it because she didn’t have a penis? Did that hated ex-appendage mean so much to him? Or couldn’t he deal with all the baggage of a transgender woman?
Maybe both?

Her heart breaking all over, she lifted her trembling hand and pointed at the door. “Get out! I can’t believe I let you touch me again.”

Trey snorted as he looked around for his clothes. Rapidly, he pulled them on and fought with the zipper to his pants. Lightning sparked in his eyes. “
Let me touch you
? How about
seduced me to touch you, sweetheart?
I’m not the one who was going around without underwear, bragging about it.
Rubbing up against me.
How’d you expect me to react? You knew exactly what you were doing. You wanted to get laid. If you’d kept your mouth shut a little longer, you’d have succeeded.”

Her blood boiled and it was all she could do to keep her tone civil. Slowly, casually, she pulled on her shirt, not bothering to wear her bra. She stuffed the lacy undergarment in her purse. “Don’t be crass. I
seduced
you?
You
shoved your computer down my throat. I know a set up when I see one.”

Trey scrubbed his stubby chin with the heel of his hand. His eyes were mere slits in his flaming face. “You’re good with computers. I offered to pay you. I didn’t try to trick you. I hoped we could be friends.”

She knew if she had a video she’d be able to replay his flirting, but it wasn’t going to do any good to point out his blameworthiness. He was in as much denial about wanting her still as she’d been when she’d told herself she was a man.

If he really wanted her, he’d have to come to the realisation himself. She couldn’t push it on him. But she didn’t know if she cared any more. She liked herself too much now to let anyone treat her poorly—old lovers included.
Especially ex-boyfriends.
She squared her shoulders and jerked her thumb at the door. “Take your computer and get out.”