Intractable Souls : Book 1 of the Bound for Ireland Series (69 page)

“Like what?”

“Well, he kind of called me a… tease. He
accused me of leading him on. But he was really crude and vicious
about it.”

“Fucking Noah Thompson, I knew there was a
reason I hated him from the first time I met him.”

“Then I found out the reason Scott and
Rachel haven’t been getting along is because of me.”

“What? Did Rachel say that?”

“Well not in so many words but she said that
because they were so busy worrying about me they stopped looking
after each other’s needs.”

“That is NOT your fault. Go on.” He
encourages.

“Hannah.” She decides not to tell him about
the conversation that took place in the women’s washroom.

“She’s a non-issue. I’ve told you that
before.” He dismisses it, as there isn’t anything to be concerned
about as far as he’s concerned.

She takes a deep breath. “The whole thing
with Stacey.” Her bottom lip starts to quiver.

Ethan’s heart cracks. “Baby. I wish I could
erase that day. I would give anything to go back and make things
right.”

“I know.”

“Will you ever forgive me?”

“I have forgiven you Ethan. I just need a
little time to forget.”

He nods accepting her request. “Anything
else?”

Olivia can’t stop herself now, suddenly
needing to purge. “I have an extremely difficult client right now,
who is stressing me right out. Nothing I do, or suggest is good
enough. I don’t know how to handle him and it’s freaking me out.”
She sniffs. “Then there are the nightmares.”

“You’re still having those?” Ethan asks
concerned.

She nods her head.

“So when was the last time you got a decent
nights sleep?”

She shrugs, her eyes starting to feel
heavy.

“Ok, eating properly and sleep. First two
things on the agenda. Got it?”

“Yes.”

“Do you know who the guy is that’s been
coming in and looking for you?”

“It sounds like Sam.” She says his name with
no emotion, her eyes don’t even blink for several moments. She dare
not mention the psychic’s prediction to him. He’d lose his
mind.

“He’s out of jail? Shouldn’t someone have
notified you?” Concern flashes across his face.

Olivia looks down, ashamed, and then peeks
up at him under her lashes. “He never went to jail, Ethan. I never
pressed charges.”

She hears his sharp intake of breath and
looks up, bracing herself for his censure. He says nothing, his
eyes gentle and his expression softens, he looks almost sad… like
he feels sorry for her. “So, what happened at the hotel?” He
changes the subject for fear he will lose his mind if he continues
to think about Sam.

“What do you mean?” She wonders where this
is going. Is he talking about Carter and Stacey? Or what happened
in the hotel room, when he wept in her arms just before falling
asleep?

“You asked me if I remember what happened at
the hotel. Obviously something happened that I should
remember.”

She shrugs and he shows his frustration with
her avoidance by letting his hands drop heavily on his thighs. He
persists, not ready to give up. “At the Lions Head Pub, after
dinner when we were talking, you insisted that you and I were in a
Non-Committed relationship.” He stares at her, locking her eyes to
his. “Then tonight you got angry when I brought up that
arrangement.”

He stops to watch her reaction. “Did
something change at the hotel?”

Breaking away from his gaze, she looks down,
twisting her hands in knots in her lap but doesn’t answer.

It’s eating away at him, his anxiety
becoming more evident in his tone as he continues pressing her for
answers. “Olivia, is there something you need to tell me? I feel
like shit for not remembering since it’s obviously something that’s
upsetting you.”

Swallowing hard, she begins to feel like
she’s back to square one. Maybe it’s for the best that he doesn’t
remember. She feels, once again, that it would be a mistake to
trust her heart to anyone. “No, nothing happened.”

He’s convinced that she’s being dishonest
with him again. Fucking alcohol and stubborn women! “Olivia, is
this really what you want? Do you still want for us to be in a
non-committed relationship?” His tone is sharp and she looks up at
him, trying to gauge his anger.

Something jabs sharply into her heart. “Yes,
that’s what I want.”

“You want us to see other people?” It’s
almost said in ridicule as he shakes his head.

She nods again.

Sighing, his heart sinks and he rubs his
hand over his face as he exhales his disappointment. “I don’t
believe you. Why won’t you just tell me the truth?” He finally
pleads.

She looks up at him, dying inside but not
making a sound, squashing all those useless, troublesome feelings
back down into the dungeon. She can’t speak.

“Fuck it! I give up. I won’t bring it up
again.” He growls in utter frustration. “How are you feeling? Are
you good?”

Nodding, she finds every ounce of strength
she has to choke back the urge to break into tears. “I’m good.” She
assures him.

“Let’s just get you home and into bed. I’m
going to stay with you tonight and make sure you’re safe so you can
get a good night sleep.”

She looks up at him wanting to say something
and stops when she sees the determination in his eyes.

“Don’t even think about protesting.” His
voice is stern with command.

Olivia says almost nothing on the way back
to her house. She would have refused Ethan’s offer to stay if she
wasn’t feeling so unsettled about some guy, whose description
resembles Sam, showing up at the bar looking for her. She admits
that if she had any doubt about the validity of the psychic’s
ramblings they have been laid to rest now. Sam is obviously
back.

Ethan drops his bag at the bottom of the
stairs and looks around the room. “Why don’t you put the kettle on
for some tea while I check the windows and doors? Nodding, she
heads into the kitchen while Ethan starts with the basement and the
back door. Her head snaps up in a panic.

“Ethan!” Her voice is panicked, prompting
him to come up the stairs quickly. “What’s wrong?”

“Don’t yell at me, ok?”

He gives her a questioning look. “Ok, what’s
going on?”

Rubbing her hand on her forehead, she blows
out an anxious breath.

“Liv??”

She wrinkles her nose in embarrassment.
“After Sam… I didn’t change the locks.” She nervously waits for his
reaction.

Stunned, his eyes open wide and he blinks
them rapidly. “Are you kidding me?”

She shakes her head. “By the time I got out
of the hospital he had already left town. It never occurred to me
that he would come back.”

“So, you’re telling me he has keys to the
house?”

“Yes.”

“Fuck!” Without hesitation, Ethan gets his
phone out of his pocket and searches for a locksmith online. “Hi, I
need emergency service. Two new door locks. Whatever is the most
secure. How soon can you be here?” There’s a pause in the
conversation and Ethan looks at his watch. Feeling overwhelmed,
Olivia moves towards him and presses into his body. His arm wraps
securely around her, while he gives the locksmith her address.
After tucking his phone back into his pocket, he lifts his hand to
the back of her head, and tenderly presses it against his
chest.

When the kettle whistles and he releases
her. “Go sit down while I get us some tea.”

“I can do it.” She needs a distraction.

He waves her off. I’ve got it. You go find
us something to watch while we wait for the locksmith.” Returning
with two mugs, he finds her waiting on the couch, her eyes looking
heavy. The moment he sits beside her she climbs onto his lap and
snuggles against him, finding refuge in his strong arms. In a
matter of moments, the anxiety has dissipated and the sleep that
has eluded her for days comfortably settles in. She barely even
stirs when Ethan lifts her off his lap and lays her on the couch so
he can answer the door.

In less than an hour, both the front and
back door locks are replaced with stronger and more effective
deadbolts. Ethan feels a load of weight fall from his chest as he
pays and walks the locksmith to the front door. While Olivia is
still sleeping peacefully on the couch, he takes another moment to
go room to room, checking to make sure windows are closed and
locked and that there are no signs that someone has been in the
house while they were gone.

When he returns to Olivia, she rolls onto
her back and stretches, lazily opening her eyes to look up at him
and smiles. She looks so beautiful in that moment that his breath
sticks in his throat as he looks down at her. “We’re all secured
now.” He holds out his hand for her. “Let’s go have a shower and
then get to bed.”

Grabbing his gym bag, he holds Olivia’s hand
and leads her up the stairs. Entering the bathroom, he turns on the
taps, allowing the water to adjust to the right temperature while
Olivia retrieves towels from the hall closet. He’s just stepping
into the shower when she returns, stopping to admire the
magnificent sight of his naked body. The dark ink of his tattoo is
just as sexy on the back of his shoulder as it is from the front.
She quickly slips out of her clothes, slides the curtain back, and
climbs in with him. Stepping back, he allows her to get under the
warm spray of the water, then picks up the body wash, squeezing
some onto the cloth, and gently scrubs it across her body working
up a soft bubbly lather. She breathes slow and deep, completely
relaxing under his touch. She even moans at one point making him
smile. “I love taking care of you.” He whispers. “There is no
greater pleasure in my life then when you let me.”

Leaning back against him, she lets the water
wash away the lather. His hands retrace his previous movements
caressing her with tenderness. “When you’re like this with me...
when you’re not trying to find ways to push me away, and you
surrender, letting me in… I feel it right down to the furthest
depths of my soul. It’s a gift. It gives me hope.”

Turning in his arms so they are chest to
chest, she wipes the wet strands of hair from his forehead and then
smoothes the drops of water from his face. She smiles as he leans
his cheek into the palm of her hand wanting to prolong her touch.
Standing on her tiptoes, she waits until he lowers his chin,
bringing his lips closer to hers. Moved by his confession, she
gives him another gift in the form of a sweet and sensual kiss. As
her lips move from tenderness into a deeper, smoldering passion,
Ethan pulls away.

“Stop.” He whispers. “This is not where I
intended to lead you. We don’t have to go there tonight. I just
want you to trust me, feel safe with me. I want to look after you
in all things, not just in sex.”

She looks up into those beautiful green
eyes, the warm spray of water on her back creating a mist around
them. Damn him, saying those romantic things and confusing her,
making her regret not telling him the words she spoke at the hotel.
He gets her heart all mixed up in things that her head is clearly
struggling to deny. She doesn’t say a word, just gazes at him and
sighs. Reaching past her, he shuts off the water, then reaches for
a towel and wraps it around her before helping her step out of the
shower.

With a towel wrapped around his waist, he
follows her into the bedroom to dry off and then pull on clean
boxers and a pair of athletic shorts. Olivia puts on her favorite
pink pajama pants and a t-shirt while watching him from the corner
of her eye. Ethan tosses his stuff back in his bag and when he
straightens, she’s standing, frozen at the side of her bed. Her
calm relaxed body now brittle and tense. He presses up against her
from behind and wraps his arms around her middle, rubbing his check
against hers from the side. “You ok?”

She shakes her head. “I don’t think I can
stay in here tonight.” She takes a few sharp breaths in.

“Ok, we can go back to my place.” He offers,
waiting out her long pause.

“No.” She says taking a deep breath and
closing her eyes. “It’s ok. I can do this. I’m just being
stupid.”

Ethan spins her around so he can see her
face. “You are NOT stupid. You’ve had a very stressful week ending
in one hell of an anxiety attack. Maybe tonight is not the right
night to take on the demons in this room. Yeah? How about tonight
we stay in the spare room instead?” Pressing his lips to the top of
her head, he lingers there until she relaxes in his arms and takes
a calming breath. “I think I can handle that.”

Leading her down the hall to the spare room,
he waits for her to get under the covers before turning off the
lights and sliding in beside her. “Liv??”

“Hmmm” She replies sleepily.

“You Ok? You’re still awfully tense.”

“Yes, I’m ok. I’m sorry.” She regrets that
her past still haunts her. It’s just not fair to Ethan.

“Can I ask you a question?” He has to ask.
He needs to know.

She feels him tense slightly and braces
herself for what’s about to come. “Yes.”

“Is it being in the bed or being with me in
the bed that freaks you out?”

She knew eventually that they would have to
have this conversation. The tension in her body is overwhelming and
she realizes that the only liberating factor is probably admission.
Taking a deep breath, she indulges him as he tightens his grip
around her waist and rubs his cheek against her temple.

“Both actually.” She’s glad for the fact
that he can’t see her face. “I’ve not been with anyone since Sam,
so being in this situation is a little unnerving on its own, but
sometimes sleeping in a bed, even alone brings back horrible
memories.”

“You were ok at the hotel.” He tries to work
through the logic of her reactions.

“Yes, it would have appeared so, until I had
the nightmare.”