Iron Cross: The Dartmouth Cobras #6 (39 page)

“He is on your watch now, Callahan,” Ramos said offhandedly as he continued down the hall. “Do with him what you will.”

“Oh, hell no!” Carter bounded after his Master, giving the coach a wide berth.

Callahan looked like he was making a concerted effort not to laugh. He glanced down at Tyler expectantly. “I’ve got to round up the rookies. You gonna be good tonight?”

Tyler jumped to his feet and gave the coach a cocky smile. Despite Raif having denied him satisfaction, he seemed to be in a very good mood. He practically vibrated with energy. “No fucking way! I’m gonna win us this game!”

Raif nodded to Callahan and followed his boy, forced to take long strides to keep up with Tyler, but he didn’t mind at all. Right at this moment, Tyler had not a care in the world other than hitting the ice and bringing his team another victory. Which made it simple for Raif to do the same.

And for every man they met by the shuttle bus as well. Tyler’s enthusiasm was contagious. With a few teasing words and feigned punches, he even managed to get Demyan to smile. The players boarded the bus, each hugging or high-fiving Tyler, their very own golden talisman. There was more excitement, more confidence among the players than they’d shown in months. Talk of making the playoffs being a real possibility.

But for Raif, there was only one thing on his mind.

Damn, I love that man.

T
he sun set over the ocean, painting the seemingly calm, never-ending stretch of shimmering water in gold and red hues beyond the frothy white waves lapping the shore. Laura sat on a rock, soaking in the view and the fresh air, ignoring the cold and simply enjoying the silence. No sirens, no flashing lights. The breeze carried the scent of the ocean, not the dirt of the streets. Or gunpowder.

Or blood.

She shivered and hugged herself, torn between wanting to go to the small guest house where she was staying on the land of the neighbors of her Mistress’s parents, and following the orders that she’d been given. Not that she’d been told to stay out in the cold, but her Mistress wanted her to take some “quiet time” to herself.

Which had her wondering if her Mistress hadn’t really wanted her around. As soon as they’d arrived, Laura had unpacked both their suitcases and headed to find Beverly to help make supper. She’d served her Mistress, which was normal even in front of her parents, but her Mistress had seemed tense.

She’s probably just worried about her father
. Laura folded her arms over her knees and rested her chin on them. With what had been going on at work, she hadn’t really had a chance to talk to her Mistress about how he was doing. He appeared worn out, but in good spirits. He’d joked about his daughter never knowing when to leave the nest. Then he’d asked about Tyler.

Laura had spilled some of the tea she’d been pouring, and Mistress had frowned at her. Then told her father about how the boy was playing well, laughed about the trouble he’d gotten in. There was no way around it, the boy still had his appeal. He had to be giving Mistress something Laura wasn’t, something more than a hard cock to play with now and then. There had to be a way to fulfill whatever needs Mistress had that only he satisfied.

You’re obsessing over him. That’s not healthy.

Maybe not, but he was a problem.

He’s not even here!

No, but Chicklet wasn’t ready to let him go. And that was frustrating because as long as Chicklet kept him, she and Laura would never have a normal life. They’d…

She sighed as she realized she’d let herself slip from thinking Chicklet instead of “Mistress.” And she was questioning her Mistress’s motives, which wasn’t allowed.

You’re sneaking around behind her back with Raif to get rid of the boy. Stop pretending you only have Chicklet’s best interests at heart.

“Selfish bitch.” Laura raked her fingers into her hair, hating herself both for being so underhanded, and for not feeling strong enough to follow through with her own plans. Was what she wanted really so bad? Yes, for years she and Chicklet had gone by the same negotiations, with very few things off limits. Sharing in itself wasn’t a problem, but they’d never discussed keeping someone around long-term.

And yet, she’d never told Chicklet she had a problem with it. Time had just passed and he was still there.

She pulled her phone out of the pocket of her jacket, hesitating as she stared down at the screen. The doubts she had came from knowing Tyler still served some kind of purpose for Chicklet. He was like an unfinished project. Part of Laura also wanted him to have a good life when this was all over. Maybe she hadn’t gone about it the right way, but would it be so wrong to see the project finished and everyone settled?

She found Raif’s number and dialed before she could chicken out. He answered on the first ring.

“Hello, little mouse.” There was noise in the background, but it drifted away as though he’d gone into a room and closed the door. “How did your first session go?”

Session?
Laura froze as she realized he meant the psych evaluation she’d had before coming down here with her Mistress. She’d done her best not to think of that at all. Didn’t want to start.

She let out an airy laugh. “As well as could be expected. How is the boy?”

“‘The boy.’ I do hate to hear you call him that. Please do not do so again.” Raif’s tone was sharp. She trembled, happy that she was only speaking to him over the phone. He sounded more relaxed after a brief pause. “He is well. In good spirits, actually.”

“You’re good for him.”

“Perhaps, but he’s a strong young man. Motivated and he excels under pressure. I pity the person who tries to bring him down.”

Laura bit her bottom lip and stared out at the water that was slowly turning black. “You mean me.”

“Of course not, my dear. I benefit from your plans as well. He’s a hot piece of ass.”

Jaw clenched, Laura held the phone away from her ear, tempted to chuck it. Or, less drastic, just hang up. What was Raif playing at? “He’s more than that to you.”

“Is he?” Raif chuckled. “Why do you care? He’ll amuse me for long enough for Chicklet to forget him.”

“That’s not what we—”

“I apologize, Laura, but I must go warm up. Please give your Mistress my best. I hope the time off does you some good.”

As she sputtered, he hung up.

Soft footsteps came from behind her, and she schooled her features as she looked back to see Chicklet.

“Hey, baby. Sorry I took so long, my father was sitting in a smoky room with a bunch of his friends and didn’t see a problem with it. Bev threatened him with his own belt. It was pretty fucking awesome.” She held out her arms as Laura slipped off the rock. Hugged her tight, then tipped up Laura’s chin with her fingertips. “What happened? You’re upset.”

“No, I just—” Damn it, she would find another way to see Tyler moving on with his life. She couldn’t stand the idea of him being hurt because of her. “We should go home. Actually, why don’t we meet Tyler in New York? We haven’t watched him play in a while.”

Chicklet laughed. “And you hated every minute of the last game we were at. Let the boy focus—you’re here to get some peace and quiet. We both know you won’t get it around him.”

A huge problem before, but not important anymore. “But Raif—”

“Has his hands full, but he’ll manage. I trust him to take care of Tyler.” Chicklet kissed her cheek. “Which means you should too. Come on, I could use a backrub. And I don’t want to hear any more about us leaving.”

Laura followed Chicklet to the house, but the last thing she wanted to do was stay here! She had to go to Tyler, but she couldn’t unless she admitted what she’d done.

Oh
God, what
have
I done?

* * * *

Chicklet hated nothing more than lies. She knew the truth wasn’t always easy—for Laura, it had thrown her life into uncertainty—but when you loved someone, nothing could be more important. She refused to choose between her subs, but if her hand was forced, she wouldn’t be picking the woman who’d stolen her heart the day they met. Who submitted so sweetly, and lately, so
completely
. Lying naked on the bed in the guest house on the Christies’ property, a couple who’d watched her run wild as a little girl, she tried to let herself relax as Laura massaged her, but just couldn’t.

But she wouldn’t let Laura know she was upset. Fuck, upset wasn’t the word for it. She remembered being a child here, old Mrs. Christie spraying her with a hose before sending her home. Mr. Christie handing her two carrots, one for their old nag and one for her. She’d always pictured that life for herself and the person—the people—she loved. And how stupid was that? Why fall in love and think it could last? There was a reason old couples made even the most cynical bastard smile a little. That kind of dedication was rare. If someone didn’t fit with your plans, you walked away from them. Nothing was really worth fighting for.

She wouldn’t let herself start thinking like that. If she closed her eyes she could picture Tyler, forty years from now, his curls gray, his body a little bent because he’d been so hard on it all his life. But he’d still have that same laugh and find enough energy to chase the neighbor’s kids around the house. And Chicklet would keep up with him for as long as she could. Hell, there were times she’d imagined those kids would be her grandchildren.

Right, and Laura would put away her gun and take up knitting…

Yeah, probably not. But Laura would teach her kids, and her grandkids, how to shoot. She’d tell them stories while they gaped up at her and realized she was a hero. And Laura was a hero, to so many.

But she wouldn’t have kids with Tyler. Chicklet didn’t recall Laura ever mentioning wanting a baby. All this was just Chicklet dreaming in Technicolor. Laura didn’t even love Tyler.

A knot in Chicklet’s shoulder gave under the pressure of Laura’s fingers and she moaned. Maybe she should just focus on today. And tomorrow. Who knew how much time they had left? The way things were going, Chicklet would eventually have to lay it all out in the open. And she wasn’t sure anything Laura could say would make this all right.

Except…Laura suddenly wanted to see Tyler. That had to count for something?

She reached over her shoulder to catch Laura’s wrist. Looked over to meet her eyes. “Did you really want to go to New York?”

Laura went still. Nodded.

“Why?”
Please tell me the truth, my love. You’re destroying everything we have.

“I’m not sure Raif is…he tried to come between Scott and Zach.”

She was hedging. Not a good start. Chicklet shrugged. “He had a thing for an old flame. He knows they’re serious and he backed off.”

“And turned his attention to Tyler. How serious can he be when he’s hardly over Zach?”

That
was a very good question. Chicklet had wondered that herself, but the way Raif looked at Tyler eased her doubts. He was fiercely protective and he posed less of a threat to Tyler than the woman who’d been in Tyler’s life for two years and was trying to hand him off to a man none of them really knew.

“I don’t know, pet, but he’s good with our boy. And with you. I thought you liked him?”

“I did, but he…he said something—”

Chicklet gently pushed Laura away from her and sat up. “When?”

“I…I called to see how Tyler was doing.”

Another lie.
Chicklet kept her expression neutral. “And?”

“He said Tyler is a hot piece of ass. He’s using him.” Laura stared at her hands. “I should have told you before, but I wasn’t sure how. I figured since you trust Raif, it’s not really my place to say anything, but I have to. Tyler practically worships the man.”

Chicklet had the urge to hug Laura, to shake her and scream “There’s my girl!,” but they still had a long way to go. Then she would call Raif and offer to thank him in ways that would humiliate any self-respecting Domme. Maybe this wasn’t the best time to play head games with Laura, but he’d gotten through to her. She wasn’t passively serving anymore, she was speaking her mind. If Chicklet could keep this woman around there was hope for them all. Most of all for Laura, because so long as she kept seeing Tyler as her greatest obstacle, she wouldn’t be dealing with the real ones.

She didn’t want Laura worrying about Tyler too much though. The point of being here
was
for Laura to recover. And she hadn’t even begun. So Chicklet pulled Laura down to lie with her, rubbing her arm even as Laura frowned. “I think he’ll be fine. I think you’re a hot piece of ass, and I use you all the time. There’s some risk to Tyler getting involved with Raif, but he has us no matter what, right?”

“Right. But Raif better be careful with him. He has no idea who he’s messing with.” Laura’s tone was hard. Determined. She’d decided Tyler needed saving and all her plans to squeeze him out of the relationship were probably going on the back burner. Raif would find Laura a little more difficult to manage from this point on. Which should be interesting.

“Leave it alone for now, sweetheart. It’s been a long day.” Chicklet met Laura’s eyes, afraid if she blinked the woman she loved would disappear again. “Do you want to talk about anything? You didn’t say much after your evaluation.”

Laura pressed her eyes shut. Shook her head. “No, Mistress. I have to discuss what happened with the department shrink. I’d rather not think of it until the next meeting. But if you want me to—”

“Not until you’re ready.” Chicklet’s eyes burned as she pressed Laura’s head to her shoulder. Just a no would have been fine, but instead, her girl had retreated into submission. And who knew how long she’d stay there?

This wasn’t about what Chicklet needed though. As much as she wished she could have her friend and her lover with her, she had to be patient. There had to be a middle ground, a way they could all be happy.

It was up to Chicklet to find it. Only…she’d never felt so fucking lost.