Jake (The Highland Clan Book 4) (20 page)

Her finger moved to her lips and a “Hmmm,” came out. Then she said, “I guess I needn’t apologize for something you do not remember.”

Jake’s sire set his chin on his mother’s head and winked at them.

Chapter Twenty-Two

Aline trudged down the hill with her sisters and Effie a couple of days later. The Grants had found them a cottage, and they planned to clean it today and make it comfortable. Robbie Grant and his wife Caralyn had brought them there yesterday to see if it met with their approval, and Aline was excited. She was finally free, and there’d be no one to tell her what to do all the time.

Glancing at Maisie skipping along beside her, Aline thanked the Lord above, the same as she did many days. Maisie already had adjusted to their new clan; she’d even made new friends. Morna sat on Aline’s hip, happy to be carried by her, and was coming out of her shell, smiling at her sisters often. Effie had told her through tears how she’d done the best she could with the girls, but she’d been so busy with four near the same age. She’d cried so hard telling the story that Aline had shushed her, especially when she’d discovered that Ina was Aline’s sister Morna. It was clear to Aline that all four lasses loved Effie, even Maeve came to visit her with a smile on her face. She had to wonder how she would have handled herself if placed in the same situation.

As soon as they stepped inside the cottage, Aline and Effie gasped. Maisie jumped up and down shrieking. Against the back wall sat a huge bed, big enough for all of them, covered with clean linens and several Grant plaids to warm them at night.

Effie turned to her with a questioning look, since the cottage had been empty when they had first looked at it except for a table and two stools. Jake stepped inside the door. “Are you pleased?”

Maisie squealed, “Aye.” She threw herself into Jake’s arms, her face lit up with joy. “I’ve not seen a bed that big before. May I sleep there? I had to sleep on the floor before.”

Jake swung her around in a circle before he set her down and kissed her cheek. “Aye, ‘tis yours to sleep in with your mama and Effie and the other lassies.”

“Jake, how?” She’d never seen such a big, beautiful bed. How had they fit it through the door? Looking at the man she loved caused her heart to break in two. How she wished to touch him, kiss him, feel his warm arms around her. If she could only be honest with him, if there was just some way, some possibility that she hadn’t considered. She loved him and wanted to tell the world how much. If she could only change her past, but she couldn’t. Perhaps she could get advice from someone wise, someone older…Maddie or Caralyn? They’d both nursed her back to health. She felt comfortable with both of them, though Maddie was Jake’s mother.

“Consider it my gift to you. My sire also gave me gold coins to use to furnish your cottage, so I thought I’d take you to the outer bailey where you can choose some other things. We have many of our own craftsmen that can make you what you need if we do not have it, though many things are kept in stock. You’ll need some pans, another table, and stools, mayhap some furs, though the windows are well covered.”

“I guess we would all enjoy an outing.” She turned to look at Effie, who was holding Una, to see what she thought.

“Nay.” Effie pursed her lips in a look that told Aline she wouldn’t change her mind. “You go, Aline. I’m staying here and cleaning. Look at the dirt in the corners, and the walls need to be scrubbed. Some fresh rushes. And this wee lass needs a nap. She’s been tired ever since we came to Clan Grant. Why do you not leave the lassies with me? Maisie will help me with the wee ones. I trust you to choose the things we need, and Jake can help you carry them here.”

Aline looked at Maisie. Part of her hoped her sister wouldn’t argue, and part of her wished she would.

Jake whispered to Maisie, “If you do us this big favor, I’ll bring you each something special.”

Maisie’s eyes brightened and she said, “Aye, I’ll stay. You will bring a gift for us?”

“Aye, but it must be a surprise.” Jake looked at Aline and said, “Ready? I am free now if it would work for you.”

She nodded, dreading this in a way, but she could not deny that she wanted to be alone with him. That she was desperate for it. On the other hand, she was afraid she would get his hopes up, and she could not allow that to happen. She set Morna down and gave her and Maisie both a kiss, then said, “Thank you, Effie.”

“You are welcome.”

Jake opened the door and held it for her.

Winter was settling in, but Aline did not care. She was so grateful to be away from Hew Gordon. Jake wrapped his arm around her, so she leaned against him. What could it hurt?

“Are you happy, Aline?”

“Aye. I’m so grateful to your clan for being so welcoming. ‘Tis a blessing to be with my sisters again. I’m only now getting to where I do not cry when I think of all that has happened. Many, many thanks, Jake.” Despite herself, she could not help but notice how handsome he looked. She did not think she’d ever seen a man as handsome as Jake. His brother was nice to look at, too, but Jake’s dark hair, blue eyes, and white smile went straight to her heart. It hurt to look at him. Was that possible?

It hurt because she knew she should tell him everything.

But she couldn’t. She simply wouldn’t ruin what little they had at this point.

They moved from building to building in the bailey, choosing pots and pans, more stools, wash basins, and other utensils. Jake found a lad to assist them and told him where to deliver all the goods.

They moved on to the stall of the man with the pelts.

“Morning to you, Jake. What can I help you with today?”

“Morning, Roy. This is Aline, and she’s just moved into a cottage. Highland winter is coming, so find us something to keep some bairns nice and warm.”

“Och, Jake. Only the best for you. I have new fox pelts, plenty of rabbit pelts.”

Aline ran her fingers through some of the pelts. They were so soft and warm, just perfect for her wee sisters. She knew the cottage would get cold, though Jake had already brought a huge pile of wood to burn and left it around the back of the cottage.

“Whatever you think is warmest, Roy. My sisters are too thin.”

They selected what they wanted and Jake handed Roy his coin.

“Jake, have they located MacNiven yet?” Aline asked once they were outside. She wasn’t worried about safety, but she was curious. She’d never understood what that man was about.

“Nay. My sire had all the men who had previously seen MacNiven search the entire area for him. ‘Tis possible he did not survive, but the consensus is he found a way out, had it all planned before the battle. Many of his men were killed, but not all, so they must have had another place to hide in. We will not give up until we discover his whereabouts, which could be back to Edinburgh. He does have allies there.”

The next hut they came to was the weaver. Jake stood in the doorway and said, “Now these will be my gifts to you and your sisters.”

The weaver woman, whom Jake introduced as Senga, came over to them and said, “How can I help you today, my lord?”

Jake didn’t hesitate, apparently knowing exactly what he wanted. “I’d like two of your finest Grant plaids for Aline, and another for a lass about her size. She’s also caring for three lassies under five summers who need nice warm plaids for the winter.”

“Coming right up. The sheep had fine thick wool last year, ‘twas such a cold winter. We’ve made some verra warm ones for this winter, though mayhap it will be a wee bit milder.”

Aline did not know what to say to Jake for all he was doing for them. She was humbled by his generosity. She stood still while Senga measured her and held bolts of fabric next to her, all while watching the man she loved.

And how she did love him. Aye, he was handsome, but that was far from his only virtue. The way he dealt with people was wondrous. He was kind to all, yet he could be tough when he needed to be. She’d seen him battle with a sword, watched the muscles ripple across his back, and he’d killed for her. And here he stood, opening his heart to her. Somehow she knew all she had to do was ask, and he would do it for her. She looked at his hands, marveling at how they could be so callused despite the tenderness of his touch.

She wished to sob her heart out. How could this have happened to her? She needn’t be so surprised. It was a wonder it had not happened already. She had not had her courses in a long time. In fact, she had tried to count, but she’d been so distraught, she could not remember. She had to tell him.

But how could she tell him she carried another man’s child? Hew Gordon had planted his seed inside her, and now it grew, causing her more heartache than she’d ever experienced. True, it was not the bairn’s fault, but she did not want Hew Gordon’s bairn. She could not ask Jake to raise that man’s child. He was heir to the chieftain. A chieftain needed many sons of his own, lads of his own blood. Whenever she thought of the possibility, she wished to heave into the bushes.

“Aline, are you all right?” Jake peered at her, concern etched on his face.

“Aye. Forgive me. Did you ask me something?” She folded her arms in front of her, rubbing them back and forth.

“Nay. I have one more thing we need, Senga.”

“Aye, my lord. What is it?”

“Do you have any of those cloth animals your sister makes?” He reached over and clasped Aline’s hand in his.

She wished to swoon. How thoughtful he was about her sisters.

Senga moved over to a chest and opened it, pulling out several cloth critters. “Aye, I have some bears, a couple of bunnies, and several puppies.” She held them out to Jake so he could see his choices.

“Do you have a preference for Maisie?” Jake said.

“Nay, ‘tis your gift. You choose.” She turned to Senga. “They are beautiful. My sisters will love them.”

“Every bairn needs something to cuddle at night. Have they not had one before?”

She shook her head, unable to speak for some reason.

“I’ll take one of each and an extra bear for my sister, and I’d like them to be different colors so they can tell them apart.”

“Verra wise choice, my lord.”

He glanced at Aline. “I thought I should bring one to my new sister.”

Senga asked, “Oh, what is her name? I heard your parents have adopted another. They have such big hearts.” She took the stuffed animals and wrapped each one individually.

“My sister’s name is Maeve.”

Jake paid for his purchases and carried the packages out.

“I think we’ve purchased enough for today,” Aline said. “My thanks, especially for the plaids.”

“You are welcome. I cannot wait to see you in our Grant plaid, the bold one especially.” They headed back down the hill toward her cottage, but then Jake took her off the beaten path to a more isolated place. He took all the packages and set them on the ground, then wrapped his arms around her and held her tight.

She looked up at him and her heart melted. Why couldn’t things be the way she wished? He brought his lips down to hers and she clung to him, wanting so desperately to be close to him. She was being incredibly selfish at the moment. Though she’d decided to tell him the truth, she couldn’t just yet. He’d want naught to do with her when he knew, but first she’d enjoy him. She needed more memories to hold close to her heart.

When she parted her lips for him, he kissed her deeply, letting her know how much he wanted her. He cupped her cheeks and pulled back. “Aline, I’ve missed you so much. You know we were meant to be together, do you not?”

“Aye.” She wrapped her arms around his waist, wanting all of his heat, feeling his hardness against her. He was hard everywhere—his chest, his abdomen, and his erection pressed against her belly telling her how much he wanted her. How she wished she could lift her skirts and slide him inside her. She rocked her hips against him, and he kissed her again, assaulting her mouth with his tongue, then nibbling on her lower lip.

“Have you changed your mind yet?”

And it was as if he’d thrown a bucket of cold water from the loch over her. She jerked back, her conscience eating at her because she was leading him on, and it was wrong.

“Please, Jake. I need more time.”

But he tugged her back toward him. “I’ll give you all the time you need.” He kissed her forehead, then brought his thumb down her cheek and her jawline.

That tender touch brought a moan from her that embarrassed her. His touch shot right to her core, to her sex.

“Would it help to talk about what happened to you? I do not wish to ask about something you do not wish to share, but if I could help in any way, I would.”

She buried her face in his shoulder, vowing not to shed a tear. “Nay. I just need more time.”

“My aunt Caralyn went through a situation verra similar to yours, and you know her well. Would you like to talk to her?”

Aline thought for a moment before nodding. “I would. Do you think she would be willing to speak with me?” She needed her mother, but her mother was gone. She trusted Caralyn.

“Come, I’ll take you there. We’ll drop your packages by the house, and then we’ll ride out to Uncle Robbie’s cottage. ‘Tis in a most beautiful location by the loch. I have been wanting to take you there.”

Not long after, she and Jake were galloping across the meadow and toward the loch. The land was quite beautiful, and she enjoyed waving to many of her new clanmates. She and her sisters had been welcomed with open arms. This was the right place for them to be.