Jasmine (15 page)

He wanted to sock her in the nose,
but didn’t. He simply stood there and stared at her trying to figure out what
exactly was going on. He looked over at the mirror that seemed to take up a
great deal of the one wall.

“I’m a professional. I do my job
very well and I get results.” He glared when she snorted. “I want to talk to
the other person. I think you should do…do whatever you have to do to bring her
around.”

She looked at him as though she
was afraid. Then she simply closed up. He saw her eyes seemed to glaze over
then she raised her nose in the air. The transformation from confused woman to
pissed off one was profound.

“I have no idea what you’re
talking about. You should know that I will discuss this with Ginny and when I
tell her how you treated me, she will not be happy.” She moved to the big
mirror and started messing with her hair. “You should learn your place. And if
I were you, I’d find one of those fat farms and try very hard to shed those
three extra people you’re carrying around.”

When she’d walked away, he’d drawn
his gun. He even had it pointed at her before he realized that he never left a
job unfinished nor would he do so now. The woman was certifiable and as soon as
he could, she was dead.

Tank drove back to the house. He
wasn’t sure what he was going to do here, but he knew that sleep was out of the
question. It had been a long day, but he was just too wired to do any more than
watch some of the porn movies that he’d gotten earlier that day. By the time he
had watched three of them, he knew that he was going to have to go out and find
himself some deadbeat hooker and do her. He fell asleep in the chair smiling
for the first time since he’d agreed to do this shitty job.

~~~

Nathan moved into Jasmine’s house
that afternoon. He wasn’t sure still whose idea it was, but he was glad for it.
He thought maybe she wanted him there because she was nervous. He wanted to be
there because he was as well.

He’d never considered marriage
before. He knew what he’d have to deal with on a daily basis. He also knew what
someone who wanted to spend a life time with him would have to do as well. It
wouldn’t be easy. It would be damned hard.

Being a recovering alcoholic was
something that would be forever. He’d never not want a drink or something just
to make things go better. The drugs would be the hardest to kick. They were
just as easy to get, but the feelings that they gave him were more immediate. Plus,
as far as he was concerned, they were much easier to hide from someone.

He knew because when he had been
in one of the rehab places before his mother had died, he was high daily. The
alcohol may have been taken away, but the cheap places his mother had shoved
him into were not all that monitored and only wanted him there for the money he
was bringing in. The last place he’d been in, the one his sister had put him in,
was much stricter and much harder to get things by. He’d been caught so many
times with something that he’d finally just given up and decided that he’d wait
until he got out then get all he wanted.

But it hadn’t worked that way. Once
he’d been sober, and he meant really sober, he started to notice things. Smells
for one thing. He could smell what they were having for a meal long before they
announced it. Then there was the smell he got from his open window. He had been
locked in his room because of something he could no longer remember and had
opened the window to escape. He’d only managed to lean out and realized that he
was seven stories up and a long way from just hopping out to escape.

It had been late June. The trees
below him were a vivid green that made his eyes hurt, but the aroma that they’d
given off had made him want to con one of the orderlies to bring him a handful
of their leaves so that he could crush them in his hand and bring the scent to
his nose. He’d felt foolish for thinking such a thought and hadn’t said
anything to anyone until he’d seen his therapist. She’d told him that he should
have done it; it may have made him feel better. She was probably right. Smiling
as he put the last of his CD’s in with hers, he went into the kitchen to find
Jasmine.

She was on the phone when he
walked in. She was also in the process of cutting up some lettuce. He knew that
she didn’t like to cook and only did it when she didn’t want to eat out. He
also knew that while she didn’t like it, she was very good at it. He took the
knife from her and with a quick kiss to her nose, moved her to finish the job.

There was chicken on the stove in
a pan. Along with the small chicken pieces, there were onions and peppers. In
another pan was squash, carrots, and garlic. The smells made him realize that
he’d not eaten since lunch that afternoon. He poured them both a glass of iced
tea and half-listened while she spoke on the phone. He smiled when he realized
she was trying to get out of whatever the person on the other end wanted her to
do.

“No, I understand that there would
be a great deal of exposure. But as I’ve said, I’m not ready to go on a—of
course I know who she is. I’d have to be dead not to, now wouldn’t I? I’m just
saying that I’m not comfortable with—if you interrupt me one more time before I
finish a sentence, I will call my attorney.”

He looked up when she snorted. He
had to hand it to her, she could make a man listen when she used that tone. He
grinned when she started talking again. It sounded like the person on the other
end of the line believed her too.

“Now, as I was saying, I’m not
very comfortable with going on a television circuit just yet. I’ve only just
released that I’m Jasmine Blackwell. I’d appreciate it if you’d just give me a
few more weeks to get used to all the attention.” She took out a pad of paper
he knew she was never without. “I will make note of that now and let you know. If
you’ll call my…secretary and let her know what dates are available then I’ll
see what I can work out.” She gave him the phone number that Drew had helped
her set up today. After she hung up, she sat in the chair and stared at the
glass in front of her.

“I can probably delay this if you
want. It smells really good, but if you need to just unwind then we can start
over on something else if this isn’t fit to eat later.” She looked up at him
when he spoke. He wasn’t sure she heard him.

“I don’t think I can do this. I
don’t think I can be this person these people think I am and be sane too. It’s
too…it’s too much.”

He walked around the big bar and
took her hand when he sat next to her. “What is it you think they want from
you, honey? And just so you know, I’m very proud of you.”

“Proud? I don’t know why. I’m sort
of overwhelmed that… That person wanted me to come onto a daytime show and tell
them all about my life and how it made me into a writer. I can’t tell them that
I became a writer because in order to escape my childhood, I dreamed up these
people and pulled them out when I was lonely or scared. They’ll think I’m
insane.”

He picked her up and pulled her
into his lap. He held her for several minutes as the warmth of home surrounded
them. He knew in that moment that he could never love anyone as much as he did
this small woman in his arms.

“I think they’ll think you’re
brave and smart. You dealt with something that would have hurt a weaker child. Look
at what I did to deal. I turned to drugs and drink.” She started to speak, so
he kissed her to quiet her. “You’re not to tell me that what we had was
different. We are the same when it comes to our childhoods. The only difference
is that I dealt with it by hiding and you with words.”

“But didn’t we both hide?” she
asked him quietly.

Had they? Yes, she was probably
right, but her way made her a much stronger person and, in turn, would do the
same for him. He kissed her again and told her that he loved her. “And if you
don’t feed me soon I’m going to have to resort to nibbling on you.” He nipped
at her shoulder. “While the chicken might be better for me in the long run, I’m
thinking you might be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

They finished cooking the meal
together then worked on cleaning up the kitchen. There were things, things only
she would understand, that he told her while they ate. He told her things that
he’d not been able to tell his therapist. Then he shared with her the first
time he’d tried to kill himself. Well, the first time he’d attempted to kill
himself that didn’t involve him getting high every day.

“I’d been about eighteen. My drug
consumption was through the roof and I was spending, on average, about ten
grand a week. My dad…well, Alyssa’s dad had just died. He was the only one…well,
he was the only male that had ever given any kind of straight talk to me. My
uncle Samuel, who turned out to be my real father, had only been my supplier.”

“Oh God, Nathan, I’d forgotten
about that. Alyssa told us right after she married my brother all about…” He
turned his back to her and waited.

 “Yeah,” he said when she didn’t
go on. “I knew about that. It was something I’ll be ashamed of for the rest of
my life. I was just sober enough to know what they were doing, but could only
hang onto my own misery about losing the only man who’d tried to make a
difference in my life. Right after Alyssa disappeared…I found myself in the
garage. I’d been at a party and I couldn’t…Christ, this isn’t easy.”

She wrapped her arms around his
waist from behind and held him. He put his hands over her and closed his eyes. He
had to tell her if for no other reason than he needed her to understand.

“Nathan and Alyssa had been close.
I think maybe he’d known for some time that we, my brother and I, weren’t his
children. He never treated us any differently. In fact, I was hard pressed to
think it was true, but the blood work, even the one my mother had a doctor try
to fix, told it all. We were not his sons. But him leaving the money to Alyssa,
all of it, was the smartest thing he could have done. We’d have gone through it
in no time and still it wouldn’t have been enough.” They moved to the living
room as he continued.

“I’d heard them talking, Uncle
Samuel and Mom. They had this idea that if Alyssa got pregnant by Samuel,
they’d get more money to raise it. And then of course they’d have to have her
declared unfit and then have her committed to watch over the money and the kid.
I don’t think they thought she’d go along, so they…” He got up and started
pacing. “They asked me the best drug to give her to incapacitate her.” He
didn’t look at her. He just continued pacing the floor. He’d already told
Alyssa. He’d told her the first day he’d gotten out of rehab. She’d been so
quiet that he was sure she’d never forgive him, but she simply got up and
wrapped her arms around him and told him she was sorry.

“I asked her why she was sorry,”
he told Jasmine. “I asked her what on earth she had to be sorry for when it was
me who had basically given her the drugs to make her sick enough that they
could try. And do you know what she said? She said, ‘but you didn’t, and that I
was just as much a victim as she was.”

“And you were,” Jasmine told him
softly. “Maybe more so. You had to live with what they’d done and she…she
escaped the only way she knew how. I can’t imagine that either one of you had a
lot of choice in what happened and both of you, you as much as Alyssa, has
overcome so much to be the people that you are now. The people I love.”

He made love to her slowly that
night. Not because he thought she needed it, but because he did. He needed that
soft connection to her, to someone who loved him. He entered her slowly, his
cock filling her and completing him. Then he held himself still above her as he
looked down at her.

“I love you, Jasmine Waite. I will
love you for longer years than there are stars in the sky. And I want us to
have children together. I want to see you swollen with our child, feel you move
with one. Will you, darling? Will you have a baby with me?”

“Oh Nathan, there is nothing in
this world I’d want more.”

His release was mind-blowing. He
came inside of her deep and knew that, if nothing else, this woman completed
him in way that he’d never be able to find with anyone else.

Chapter 15

The bookstore was packed. Jazzie
could hardly move without bumping into someone. She tried to make her way to
the door to…well, escape came to mind, but there was someone always wanting to ask
her something. When someone took her hand, she nearly screamed she was so
terrified. She turned to look at Alyssa.

“You look ready to bolt. I
wouldn’t if I were you. You might cause a riot. Take some deep breaths.” Jazzie
nodded at her. “Nathan said you asked him not to come down.”

“I was afraid no one would show up
and I didn’t want him to feel sorry for me. I wish now I hadn’t been so hasty. Oh
God, Alyssa, these people are here to see Jasmine Blackwell, not me.” She felt
herself start to panic again. “I need to leave. Right now, I need to leave.”

“No, you’re not. Calm down.” Alyssa
put her arm around her and pulled her in for a quick hug. “You’re going to be
fine. And you are Jasmine Blackwell, you dork. You have half an hour before you
start signing books and I think we should take a stroll around the street. Look,
there’s Quinn and Sin now.”

Jazzie looked up to see her other
two sisters. Lilliane joined them a few minutes later. Gracie had sent her
three dozen red roses and the sexiest under things she’d ever seen. She’d told
her to wear them under her clothes and only she’d know how incredible she
looked in them. Well, her and the man who’d answered the phone. She wouldn’t be
able to make it to this one, but when she came to New York for a signing, she’d
throw her a bash of all parties and they’d celebrate in style.

They walked out of the bookstore
together after telling Mildred they’d be back. After reassurances from the book
store owner they began to window shop down the street. Sin snorted when Jazzie
reminded them that their mother’s birthday was day after tomorrow.