Jesse's Soul (2) (13 page)

It was
a guilty pleasure she should’ve been embarrassed by, but Emery would do almost anything to see him again sans jersey.

“You’re screwed girl. There is just something about a man in riding pants. I’m with y
ou, the way you can see the waistband of their boxers because they haven’t zipped their pants yet. How you can see every cut and bite of definition. There is no defense against it, it’s like Kryptonite. Let me ask you this...he’s not real forward and is kind of conservative about PDA around anybody. Did he just wink and walk off?”

“Oh God
, no. I’m not that lucky. It was way worse. I’m one thousand percent sure he could tell I was so freaking hot I was about to melt. He even said he’d take it back off when he got back. I mean, seriously. Who says that?”

Emery sat down on a folding chair pulling her legs up tight to her body, she rested her forehead on her bent knees. She was alone, and admitting all of this to Molly was embarrassing, but talking about it left her needy and confused.

“Maybe he was just trying to make you laugh. I mean…no, I know he really likes you and was for sure flirting. But maybe he—“

“Oh, I know he was trying to be cute and funny and all that. He’s a real comedian.” Emery answered, the words mixing with a fake laugh.

“If I know Jess as well as I think I do, he was only kidding on the surface. Maybe he was feeling you out, when he got the reaction you gave him, he let go of the humor.”

Emery had always been considerate of other’s feelings when it didn’t involve a race. Jesse had been so sure of himself all along, she hadn’t stopped to think that maybe he was as nervous as she was. She lifted her head and gently bit the pad of her thumb while she contemplated this new piece
of the puzzle Molly gave her.

“He’s hot as hell, though. You have to admit it.”

Molly must have understood her reluctance to know Jesse’s true intentions. Joking and maybe a tiny bit of flirting were all she had to give. Anything more wasn’t on the table, so her friend had steered their conversation back to fun again.

“I know. It doesn’t help that I really like his five o’clock shadow, it’s so sexy. I don’t know how guys shave it like that, but, oh my God, that just does it for me.”

“And the muscles. Don’t get me wrong, now. I’m a married woman, a very happily married woman. I just know I can agree with you because these guys are all ripped, my husband included. It’s this sport, the way they train…it’s a wonderful result for us, huh?”

“You’re too funny. Yeah, he’s freaking ripped. And you’re right, they all are. I remember my brother being like that when he raced.”

“Makes me horny just thinking about it. I might have to go make my husband take care of this problem.”

Emery started giggling like a high school girl, feeling freer than she had in months, just at the sound of her friend’s voice. She had gone to a really dark place after the surgery and with Collin leaving. She’d always had such a bubbly personality, but the last two years had been so bleak.

“Okay, but what am I supposed to do?”

“You obviously think he’s hot, right?”

“Okay…yes, I’m attracted to him. That or I have heart problems on top of everything else because it races ninety to nothing every time he gets close to me,” she said, laughing into the phone.

“Well, I can tell you, with absolute certainty, he wants you too.”

“But that’s the problem, Molly—“

“Have you talked to him?”

Emery’s heart sank. “No, I haven’t.”

“Emery.” Molly’s voice was soft. “I know him. He’ll understand, I promise. You have to talk to him. Soon.”

“How would he understand, Mol? How do explain that to a guy you barely know? And that’s the problem because it’s a huge catch twenty-two. You don’t want to get attached and then tell him, ‘Oh by the way, kids? Yeah, not so much. Sorry Charlie.’ And on the other hand, it’s not a great conversation starter with someone new.”

“He’s not just anyone. This is Jesse we’re talking about. He cares for you.”

“I know.” Emery rested her forehead on her bent knees again.

“Do you trust him?”

“I guess. Kind of. How do you trust someone you hardly know with that kind of a bombshell? I just…I like him. I don’t want him to…ugh. I guess I don’t want him to hear the story and then have nothing to do with me. And I don’t want him to feel like he’s got to keep liking me because he feels sorry for me. I swear, it’s a mess.”

“You have to give him a chance.”

“But see? This is exactly why I kept telling him business only. I didn’t want to do personal, I didn’t want to like him. Molly…I just didn’t want to fall for him and get hurt again. I can’t do it again. Taking a chance is so huge. I don’t know if I can do it.”

“But, I keep telling you, this is Jesse we’re talking about. He’s different. He just is. He’s so sweet and softhearted. I just can’t picture him ever hurting you, not if he can help it.”

“You’re right. He’s been nothing but sweet and caring and affectionate. He makes sure I eat and that I don’t work all night, which gets annoying, but I know where it’s coming from, and I truly appreciate it. You’re completely right. But what if? What if I tell him and he stops doing all that? I really think he’s a nice guy, but what if he turns out to be like Collin? What if even the nice guys all turn out to be worthless?”

“He won’t.”

“How do you know that? For really sure, know that?”

“Do you trust me?”

“Yeah, I trust you. Of course.”

“Okay…and I trust him. You’ve got to have faith, honey.”

“Faith, huh?”

“That or just tell him you want to screw his brains out.”

“Have faith in him or what? Excuse me? You did not just say that.”

“What?”

Her sweet, innocent looking friend just shocked the crap out of her, and after growing up on dirt tracks that was almost impossible to do. Her jaw was left open, waiting for the words that had deserted her.

“Molly Sterling.” It was Emery’s only comeback.

“Yes, Emery Kincaid. Did you call for help?”

“Yes, but—“

“Are you smiling? Do you feel even the teensiest bit better?”

“Yes, but seriously, telling me to just go ask him to have sex with me is not what I expected you to say.”

“I don’t like to see you sad. You’re my friend, I want to do what I can to cheer you up.”

“Uh-huh. That’s your way of cheering me up? Talk about sex?”

“Yep.” Molly snorted. “Worked too, huh?”

“You’re a funny, funny girl.”

“Gotta open you up. Expand your horizons.”

“Oh, honey, you’re opening me up to whole new world all right. Oh,
crap. Here he comes.” She started grinning, embarrassed by parts of their conversation now that Jesse was riding toward her.

“Keep me posted.”

“Okay, I will.”

“And keep in touch. It feels like forever between races.”

“Definitely. Thank you, Molly, for listening and everything.”

“That’s what I’m here for. I love you, friend.”

Emery’s heart melted as Molly told her goodbye. “I love you too, Mol, bye.”

It had only been a few days since she’d met Moll
y, but she was so full of love it was contagious, and Emery couldn’t help but feel the same way about her. Most women didn’t think twice about picking up a phone to call a friend if they were down, or even happy about something. Until Molly, that really wasn’t possible. She rolled her eyes as she placed her cell on the table. Only Molly would end a totally serious conversation with a follow up like “screw his brains out.” Emery had taken a chance on Molly, and she had been—she shook her head as the realization stole her breath—she’d been right.

Just maybe…

~

Jesse rode the bike up to his designated spot and turned it off. Swinging his leg over the seat, he maneuvered the bike onto its stand. Taking in the area around him, he realized everyone else must have still been at lunch, except for the one person beside him, who he instinctively knew hadn’t eaten yet. He could tell from the side she was on the phone, but even in the middle of nowhere, she was curled into the cell, apparently wanting secrecy. He glanced around again, and yeah, they were still the only ones outside the semi. A stab of jealousy hit him in the gut as his mind started running down a list of people she could be talking to. At the top, it had to be an ex.

Girlish giggles broke into his growing ball of fury and extinguished it on the spot.

Oh, thank God. It has to be Molly.

Relief flooded him. He knew he was attracted to Emery, and over the last couple of weeks of constant contact, that attraction was morphing into more. Maybe it was because the chase was all at once so intriguing and frustrating and exhilarating. Maybe it was because she wasn’t making it easy for him. But that didn’t explain the sudden wave of envy that hit him. He’d never been like that, he’d never been that guy that was all him, all controlling and worried that he wasn’t the center of her universe. Especially since he wasn’t the center of Emery’s—yet.

He was thankful Molly was getting Emery to open up a little bit and not be so stand-offish, and he held out hope that he could break through her armor. He was more than willing to accept Molly’s help.

Her need for sudden p
rivacy sent a jolt through him. He snickered to himself, figuring out the little mystery. Jesse knew exactly what they’d been talking about, or more like
who
they’d been talking about, and he fought like the devil to contain his own laughter, but he was so proud he was damn near beaming. Sure, he wasn’t exactly one hundred percent positive they were talking about him or that it was even Molly on the phone, but it was a hell of a lot better picture in his head than the first scenario he’d come up with.

She quickly disconnected the call, alerting him that she knew he’d returned and was close by. Emery shook her head as she reached out to place the cell back on the small work table. From the side, he got a glimpse of the wide grin on her face. He loved teasing her, but never to the point of pissing her off. Jesse had worked too hard and b
een too patient to screw up now. But their friendship had started off with that joking aspect, and Jesse could tell she liked the back and forth as much as he did.

“So girl talk, huh?” he asked as she laid her phone back down on the table beside her.

Emery instantly turned flame red and busied herself with the motor on the race bike without answering.

“I
see
…
” Jesse’s voice went higher. “Girl talk…about me?” He lightly nudged her with his elbow. “Huh, Em?” If at all possible, her cheeks reddened even more, sending a surge straight to his groin. He just wanted to grab her and hold on tight. Instead, he shifted his stance, trying subtly to adjust himself to alleviate the sudden pain she’d caused him and focused on keeping his breathing calm.

Her hands were frozen, still holding the wrench and a bolt. Nothing moved but her chest with rapid breaths and a quick jerk of her head.

“No,” she smarted back, in the most defiant tone he’d ever heard.

She was going to fight him tooth and nail, but damn, he was having more fun trying to pin her down and make her admit the truth than he’d ever had in the past with women who drooled over him. His heart swelled. Jesse knew without a doubt in the world that Emery was the other half of him. He just needed to make her see that. Of course
, his soul mate had to be the most stubborn woman on the face of the earth.

“Uh-huh. Sure…you weren’t.” He dragged out the last word.

Emery turned and tilted her chin at him. “You’re not the only guy on the planet, you know.”

The woman was going to be the death of him. For over two weeks, they had been shoulder to shoulder from morning until bed. Day in and day out. The attraction was there, he could feel it, he just needed her to let go and let him in. Jesse knew they were a perfect match. He just needed the chance to prove it to her. In the meantime, he’d push and tease and push some more.

“I know. But I think I’m the only one making you blush right now.”

She rolled her eyes at him and turned around on her stool to keep working. He came up behind her and began rubbing her shoulders.

Emery sucked in a deep breath. “What are you doing?”

He leaned down to her ear and softly said, “Don’t worry about what I’m doing, just relax.” He kept his strokes hard, but not painful. Jesse could feel how tense she was underneath his hands, but he kept the touch strong, letting her know he wasn’t going anywhere.

“I can’t relax with you doing that.”

That was music to his ears. He smiled, proud of the fact that it was
his touch that was causing the edginess in her as need started to coil. The frustration he heard in her voice wasn’t at him. It was with herself. Jesse continued rubbing her shoulders and neck, saying nothing, watching as her body jerked then smoothed under his hands as his strength dominated her nerves. He could only assume she’d been hurt very badly by a man and was really nervous about taking a chance with him. That was all right. He’d take it slow. Little intimate gestures here and there. They would add up, and before she realized it, her walls would be torn down and she would be his.