Jessie Belle: The Women of Merryton - Book One (32 page)

That
was until I saw something that completely melted my heart. Down the long table
sat six-year-old Ethan. He sat there quietly, not talking to any of the other
children, and he didn’t seem that interested in decorating his flag cookie.

Blake
took the seat next to him. “You going to decorate that cookie?” Blake asked him
kindly.

Ethan
shook his head. “I don’t really like frosting.”

“Me,
either.” Blake smiled at him. “You know, you could just eat the cookie.”

“Really?”
Ethan’s eyes lit up.

“Yeah,
and if you like it, I know where we can get more.”

Ethan
excitedly picked up his cookie and took a bite. His eyes and smile said he
liked it. Phew. My reputation was on the line there.

“Decorating
cookies is for girls,” Ethan informed Blake.

“It
can be,” Blake said.

“I
didn’t want to decorate cookies, but my dad couldn’t come because he had to go
to work. I wanted to do the three-legged race with him.”

Blake
thought for a moment. I knew he was torn, but he came through in the end. “I
could do it with you.”

My
heart almost burst. My eyes welled up with tears.

“That
would be awesome!” Ethan shouted. “I’m going to tell my mom.”

Blake
walked my way to tell me, but before he could get a word out, I pulled on his
shirt and embarrassed Maddie again.

“You’re
going to give me a reputation,” he teased when my lips departed from his.

“You
could be known for worse things than your wife being completely into you.”

“Wish
me luck,” he said as he walked off.

I
wished I could have left my station to watch him, but no matter. I was proud to
call myself Mrs. Blake Summers.

By
the time we came home with a second place ribbon in hand, we were tired and
decided we would save camping for another weekend. For Maddie’s sake we decided
to do some camping-type things at home. Our hearth on our stone patio had
rarely been used, so we figured we should change that.

Blake
got a nice fire going while Maddie and I made steak and veggie foil dinners.
Heavy on the vegetables for Blake, not so much for Maddie. We sat on a large
blanket in front of the fire as we watched our dinner cook in the coals. Maddie
sat in between us and rested her head in my lap while I stroked her hair. Blake
smiled frequently at the scene. I had to admit I liked it. I was happy she
didn’t hate me, and I think she even kind of liked me.

“You
should read to us,” Maddie said to me as I ran my hands through her beautiful
hair.

“You
think so? Do you think your dad would like to hear about Cassie and Eric?” I
winked over at Blake.

“Well,
they kiss a lot, so probably.”

Blake
narrowed his eyes. “We’re supposed to be camping. You don’t tell love stories
around a campfire.”

I
laughed. “What do we do then?”

“When
men camp, we don’t talk.”

“Now
I know that’s a lie.”

“Come
on, Dad.”

“Fine.
How about I tell you a story my dad told me once when we went camping.”

I
was surprised by the mention of his dad. He rarely, if ever, spoke about Owen
Summers. I had only met the man once several years ago. I looked at Blake,
whose features were only enhanced by the glow of the firelight. I was thinking
our private weekend might end up being a camping trip or a cabin getaway.

“This
story is called
The Black Ribbon.
”

Maddie
sat up to pay attention. I knew I was intrigued. I didn’t even know Blake knew
any stories.

“Okay,
it goes something like this,” he said mysteriously. “Long ago, a young man met
and fell in love with a beautiful young woman.” Blake smiled over at me. “She
was always dressed exquisitely and she always wore a black ribbon around her
neck. Soon the man and the woman were married and moved into a little cottage
by the sea. They started out very happily, but soon the young man became more
and more curious as to why his wife wore a ribbon around her neck all the time.
One day he decided to ask her. The only answer he received was that he would be
sorry if she took it off, so she would not take it off. The young man was not
happy with his wife's answer. Time passed and eventually all he could think
about was that black ribbon. One day he awoke before his wife, went into her
sewing box and got a pair of scissors, and cut off the ribbon that was around
her neck. His wife woke up with a start. Her head fell off and rolled onto the
floor while the woman screamed, “I told you you’d be sorry!”

“Dad!”

“That
was terrible,” I said. 

“I
didn’t say it was a good story.”

It
definitely wasn’t a good story, but it was the best night. We ate, talked, and
laughed. I don’t remember a lot of what was said, but I would never forget the
feeling of that night. I think Maria definitely would have been proud of me.
Maybe someday soon I could become a full-fledged Maria instead of one in
training.

To
top off the perfect night I got out my homemade s’mores. I mean, what was
camping without s’mores? Maddie had never roasted a marshmallow in her life, so
I was honored to show her how.

I
handed her a long metal roasting stick, and Blake got one, too.

“I
don’t like roasted marshmallows,” he said as he took the stick out of my hand.

I
gave him a stern look, which didn’t last long as he smiled warmly at me. “It’s
still fun to roast them. And besides, you’ve never tasted my s’mores. You may
like them.”

“Yeah,
Dad. You should eat more of Jessie’s food.”

“Okay,
okay,” he gave in. “Give me a marshmallow.”

I
loved the two-against-one dynamics we had going on.

Maddie
didn’t wait for instructions and made the rookie mistake of going straight for
the flames. Within seconds we had a marshmallow on fire.

She
pulled it out. “Ugh. What do I do with it?”

“Blow
it out,” I told her.

She
quickly blew it out and was left with a very charred marshmallow. “Looks
gross.”

“As
long as it’s cooled off, you can take it off and throw it in the fire. Next
time just hover the marshmallow over the coals and keep turning it until it’s
evenly brown.” I showed her how it was done.

Both
she and Blake joined me until we had three perfectly roasted marshmallows. I
got out my cookies that I had finally perfected. They would be on the menu
starting in September. We smashed the marshmallows between the
dark-chocolate-covered graham cookies.

“Mmm,”
Maddie said as she took a bite of hers.

I
loved watching people enjoying my creations.

I
turned to Blake, who had set his s’more down on the tray next to us. “Really,
you aren’t even going to try it?”

“Give
me a bite of yours.”

I
raised my eyebrow at him.

“Please.”

“Well,
since you said please.” I smiled. I held up my s’more for him and he took a
bite out of it as I held it. It was kind of sexy. “So?”

“It’s
all right.”

There
was a little marshmallow left on his lips. I leaned in close to remove it for
him, reminding myself we had a child present, but one little kiss wasn’t going
to kill her. “We’ll make a dessert lover out of you yet,” I whispered against
his lips.

“I
look forward to it.”

And
so did I.

As
we stood together as a family at Carter’s grave, I couldn’t believe it had been
a year. A year since I held his lifeless body in my arms and almost wished I
could die too, and then I almost did die.

As
I snuggled in closer to Blake’s side and watched Maddie place the bouquet of
white daises in the vase near Carter’s grave, I thought it was amazing the
difference a year could make. I looked up to Blake, who had tears in his eyes.
We had never been to Carter’s grave together except for the funeral, and I was
taken aback by his emotion. It only added to the tears I was already shedding.

I
felt the lightest of kisses on my head and heard a whispered, “I love you.”

Maddie
stood up and joined us. I held her to me and felt some peace.

“Does
it hurt when you die?” she asked. She had been asking a lot of questions about
death lately. Ever since she and I went in the attic in search of my old prom
dresses she was interested in seeing after we read about Cassie and Eric
attending Cassie’s prom. I had forgotten Blake had placed Carter’s crib and
cradle up there. It was the first time I told her about her brother. We cried
together and she hugged me fiercely, and for the first time she said, “I love
you, Jessie.” And in that moment I realized how I had fallen in love with her.

I
hugged her closer. “Sometimes, but I think for most people it’s peaceful.” I
knew she was really asking was if it was going to hurt when her mom died. We
still hadn’t told her about her mom, but I think she knew. I wanted to tell
her. No, what I wanted was for her mom to tell her, but Sabrina refused. Blake
and I had both talked to Sabrina about it, but she was firm in her answer. She
told us we could do whatever we wanted, and that Maddie was ours now. That
thought made me smile.

I
knew, though, that soon we would have to tell Maddie the truth, and that broke
my heart. I wasn’t sure how to tell her that her mother was dying. And I felt
both guilt and relief that it could wait another day.

Blake
left my side for a moment and knelt in front of our son’s grave and placed the
football I had given him for Father’s Day over a year ago near his headstone.
The act had me wiping at my eyes furiously and pulling Maddie even closer to
me. I was happy she was a hugger.

I
was happy about a lot of things lately, mainly the two people closest to me. We
still had our kinks to work out, but I couldn’t remember when I had been
happier. I was working less and at home more. The same could be said for Blake.
Our nights were filled with family activities and laughter, a lot which was at Blake’s
expense. It was nice to have another person in the house that also found
Blake’s tastes and habits odd. Maddie and I giggled at them together
frequently.

My
heart was slowly starting to heal. I knew I would never get over the death of
my son. I don’t think it is something you’re supposed to get over, but Blake
and Maddie added patches to my heart that made me feel mostly whole.

I
could see Blake’s shoulders shake as he knelt at the grave, and it broke my
heart. We had talked more about Carter lately than we ever had. I wished we
could have been more open with each other earlier. It would have been
beneficial for both of us. I didn’t realize how deeply Blake’s hurt ran and how
scared he was of losing me. I loved laying in his arms at night and talking to
him. He actually talked. And I loved even more waking up in his arms. He had
somehow magically gotten over the whole can’t-sleep-close-to-another thing. I
guess sleeping apart for those few months was not easy on him and he missed me.

I
moved forward with Maddie next to me and rested my hand on Blake’s shoulder. He
reached up and held it firmly with his own. I looked up to the sun-filled azure
sky and, for the first time in months, felt like maybe God was there.

Blake
stood after several minutes and gathered both Maddie and me in his strong arms.
I loved the feel of us all together.

“Dad,
I can’t breathe,” Maddie said after a long moment.

Blake
chuckled and released us. He looked at me and smiled warmly, wiping the tears
from my cheeks. We then took our leave hand in hand back to our car. Blake
opened my door for me. He was taking tips from Maddie. She had taken it upon
herself to give him relationship advice.

I
still grinned at him every time and he still played it off like it was no big
deal.

Our
drive to the Richters’ house was mostly silent. Maddie was spending the day
with Katie.

“Love
you,” Maddie called out to us as she exited the vehicle.

“Love
you,” Blake and I both responded in unison.

We
watched her until she was securely in their home.

“I
suppose you have to get back to work?” I said to Blake as he backed out of the Richters’
driveway.

“Unfortunately,
but first I have something to show you.”

“Is
this a private showing?” I somewhat teased.

He
grinned seductively at me. “I wish. But I would be up for a private showing
later tonight.”

“It’s
a date.”

He
reached over and smoothed my hair. “I can’t wait.”

Me
either,
I thought to myself. I was thankful that one kink had
worked itself out quite nicely.

Blake
pulled into our drive and stopped near the house instead of pulling into the
garage. “Wait here for a minute,” he instructed me.

“Okay.”
I smiled, wondering what all the mystery was about. I watched him walk into the
house and then waited for the minute he instructed me to. He came back out
looking pleased, and he opened my door for me and held out his hand. I took it
and he led the way back into the house.

I
couldn’t see anything different as we walked through the mud room and then into
the great room. Then Blake turned me toward the fireplace. I gasped and held my
hand to my mouth. Tears flooded my eyes as I looked up at a grinning Blake. I
walked slowly toward the painting of the woman at a crossroads in her life. The
woman that had me mesmerized and that had frequented my dreams. Margaret
Mackenzie had become a hero in my life. I had thought of her and her choices often,
her courageous and bold choice to turn toward the cold, unforgiving water and
to take a chance on love and even God. And now here she hung above my
fireplace.

“Oh,
Blake, I love it! Thank you,” I said as I held him tight. “How did you manage
this?”

“I
had some help from your dad this morning.”

I
loved that those two were somewhat getting along. My dad was still not happy
that Blake wouldn’t come to church or Sunday dinner, but they were at least
talking.

“It’s
so expensive.”

“Yeah,
I know,” he said lightheartedly, “but I decided a Harley could wait.”

I
pulled back from him and looked up into those eyes of his. “You gave up your
motorcycle for the painting?”

“For
the painting and the retainer fee for an adoption lawyer.” He said it like it
was no big deal.

I
felt like my heart had burst for a moment as this massive surge of love pumped
through it. “Blake, are you saying what I think you’re saying?” I was almost
afraid to hear the answer.

He
lovingly kissed my forehead and lingered there. The warmth of his lips had me
feeling tingly. His lips left my skin and he smiled back down on me. “Jess,
will you adopt a baby with me?”

My
words caught in my throat as I tried to answer, and I realized for the first
time that my mother was right. I could see forever in his eyes. The emotion
only allowed me to nod.

“I’ll
take that as a yes.”

I
nodded again in the affirmative.

“I
set up an appointment for next week.”

I
finally found my words. “I love you.”

“I
sure hope so,” he teased. “I almost cried when the Harley dealer called with an
amazing deal that I had to turn down.”

“How
ever will I make that up to you?”

He
pulled me flush against him, “For starters, I think I’m going to be late to
work.”