Jessie (15 page)

Jessie thought about Seth from the moment she woke up on Saturday morning, but no one looking at her would have known. She went through her morning routine with the girls, breakfast and cleanup, before heading down to the store. There were a few things she had not done the night before, and she got to them now. The girls were excited about their day with the Rathmans, and when she left them in the large apartment upstairs, they had been talking about the Rathmans' house and cat.

What Jessie hadn't banked on was Seth's early arrival. She opened the door, swinging it wide for the day, and found Seth in one of the rocking chairs out front. He stood, hat in hand, and stared at her.

“Hello, Jessie,” he said quietly, his eyes watchful.

“Hello,” Jessie said, her voice a bit formal.

“Am I too early?” Seth asked, fearful of making a mistake.

“No, but—”

Whatever Jessie was going to say had to wait. Hannah appeared just then, calling her mother inside. Jessie went that way and Seth followed slowly.

“Clancy says we're not staying all day.”

“Where is Clancy?” Jessie asked.

Hannah turned to yell for her sister, but Jessie stopped her with a hand to her arm.

“Do not shout,” her mother instructed. “Go and find her, and both of you come back.”

Hannah did as she was told. Jessie was aware that Seth had come in behind her but didn't try to engage him. She figured she would get the girls out the door and then deal with this man who wanted back into their lives.

“Hello,” Clancy said, having come down ahead of her sister and spotted the tall man inside the door. She approached him, completely forgetting that her mother had wanted to see her. Hannah was just behind her and followed.

“Hello,” Seth said, smiling down at the two little girls. He hadn't planned to do anything without Jessie's permission, but they were so beautiful and small that his heart took over.

“Who are you?”

“Clancy,” her mother said, using a voice she knew well. “Come here. You too, Hannah.”

The girls obeyed without question, and Seth retreated a bit, forcing himself not to stare.

“You are going to the Rathmans' all day. You will not fight with each other or either of the Rathman girls, and you will do everything Mrs. Rathman asks of you. Do I make myself clear?”

The girls nodded.

“Go on now. Have fun.”

The girls kissed and hugged her and shot out the front door without giving Seth another glance. Not until Jessie had walked out front to see them go down the street did she step back inside and face her husband.

“They're beautiful, Jessie. You've done an amazing job.”

“Thank you,” she said, relaxing just slightly. “I didn't want to introduce you until we'd talked.”

“I understand.”

“But we can't talk now,” Jessie went on. “Saturday is my busiest day.”

“Of course it is. I'm sorry.”

His humility took her by surprise and for a moment Jessie didn't know what to say.

“Is there anything I can do?” Seth offered into the quiet.

“No,” Jessie didn't even hesitate. “If I get too busy, I'll ask Jeb to help me.”

“He broke his ankle.”

Jessie's mouth opened a little before saying, “When was this?”

“Last night. I was with Rylan when someone came for his help.”

“Is he going to be all right?”

“I think so, but he'll be laid up for a time.”

Jessie was still processing the idea when a woman came in with her son. She wasted no time in telling Jessie what she wanted, and it was obvious she expected it on the spot. Seth watched Jessie in patient action, debating his next move, when someone else entered and went right to the front counter.

Not sure if he was making a huge mistake or not, Seth stepped behind the counter and offered his assistance. The man was looking only for his mail, and Seth found it for him. He didn't plan to hang around, but before he could tell Jessie he was leaving, two more folks entered. Still wondering if he was doing the right thing, Seth assisted them as well, amazed at how familiar it all was and how much he remembered. By the time he and Jessie had the store to themselves again, three hours had passed.

“How have you remembered so much?” Jessie asked when she found Seth down one aisle restacking the pots.

“I don't know,” he said, coming to full height and looking down at her. “It just suddenly came back.”

Jessie nodded, and Seth knew he could wait no longer to tell her something.

“More than one person recognized me, Jessie. I didn't think about it until it was too late. I don't want my being here to make trouble for you.”

Jessie stared at him, weighing her options. She decided to say what she was thinking.

“There are no third chances here, Seth. If you hurt my girls, I'll never let you get near them again.”

Seth nodded, not surprised by the strength of her words. Jessie was never a woman to be trifled with, and in truth he deserved far worse.

“When the girls go to sleep tonight, we'll talk.”

“What time will that be?”

“Come to the back door at eight. I want to know where you've been and why you didn't come back. After that, I'll tell you what this is going to look like. If you can agree with my terms, I'll introduce you to the girls tomorrow. If not, you can leave on the next train.”

Seth had time only to nod before they were interrupted. Jessie assisted a rancher who needed to order a machine part. Seth waited on a small boy who had a penny for candy, able to do so with a hopeful heart. Jessie hadn't kicked him out, and at the moment that was all he cared about.

“You stayed all day and worked at the store?” Rylan confirmed during supper, sure he'd heard wrong.

Seth shrugged. “The store got busy, and it just worked out that way.”

“Did you actually remember things?” Bri asked.

“Almost everything,” Seth said, still rather amazed.

“And the girls? Did you see them?”

“Not to meet them. I'm to go back tonight so we can talk.”

“With Jessie or the girls?”

“Just Jessie. When she's heard my story, she'll tell me what she has in mind.”

“Does it seem promising, or are you working not to get your hopes up?” Rylan asked.

“I'm glad she didn't see me to the door, but she spelled it out in plain terms that I'm on my last chance here. I don't need more than one chance, but she couldn't possibly know that.”

“Will you discuss the two of you or only your relationship to Hannah and Clancy?” Bri wanted to know.

“I would be very surprised if I was allowed to get near Jessie again. She's done with me, but for some reason she's letting me into the girls' lives.”

“Do you hope to have Jessie as your wife again, Seth? I mean, really your wife?” Bri suddenly asked.

“I don't know,” Seth said slowly, his face thoughtful. “By leaving and staying away so long, I killed her love for me. I'm sure of that. As for my own feelings, I've become so good at not thinking about her that I would have said my own love was dead. Then I saw her today and it wasn't quite that simple. She's my wife, and I still feel a lot of things for her.”

“Maybe it's best to keep your heart in check for right now,” Rylan put in, surprising both of the other adults. “I think you might find your heart and hands full just getting to know the girls. Maybe one relationship at a time is enough.”

Seth thought that Rylan had a good point. He had never been a father, not a real one, and was probably in for many surprises. His mind had begun to speculate about the meeting with Jessie and whether he would ever get to know his girls, but he knew that was dangerous territory. Instead he concentrated on the moment and found himself observing the way Rylan and Bri handled Danny. Without warning it occurred to him he didn't have to travel far for a chance to learn about parenting.

Eight o'clock could not come fast enough for Seth. He didn't know where he would stand two hours from then, but at the moment he just wanted to tell Jessie everything and let her decide. Jessie let him in the back door right on time and led him up the stairs. The apartment looked much the way he remembered, but the davenport was new, and Jessie had added a rocking chair to the living room. It was still comfortable and warm.

“You can have the sofa,” she offered, taking the stuffed chair to the side. Plenty of light came from the front windows, but Jessie had two lanterns burning. It would be dark soon enough.

“Will we wake the girls, talking this close?”

“No,” Jessie said with a shake of her head. “They played at a friend's house all day and are out cold.”

Seth looked toward the two bedrooms. The one with the closed door was their bedroom, the one he'd shared with Jessie. For a moment he was swept back to a time when he had been faithful and committed, but before he could get very far, Jessie spoke.

“Where have you been?”

“Texas,” Seth said, turning immediately to look at her. “Most recently in Heywood Prison.”