Jesus Lied - He Was Only Human: Debunking the New Testament (26 page)
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Authors: CJ Werleman
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So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body. So it is written: “The first man Adam became a living being”; the last Adam, a life-giving spirit.” (1 Corinthians 15:45 NIV)
What do the nine aforementioned points tell us? They tell us we can learn nothing about Jesus from the teachings of Paul! This also confirms the scholarly consensus that Paul made little use of Jesus’ life in his writings. Why not? We don’t know, but it would appear safe to presume that the Gospels, as we had feared, fictionalized their respective biographies of Jesus well after the writings of Paul.
How can we make such an extrapolation? Because it is bleeding obvious that Paul had no idea about the myriad quests, the myriad magic and the myriad supernatural shit that the Gospels claim Jesus to have plopped out during his ministries.
But why then, is this discovery so pivotal to the Gospels validity? Simple, and in case you weren’t paying attention; Paul’s writings came first, literally a lifetime before the Gospels authors opined their respective works.
In 1888 the great atheist philosopher who coined the phrase, ‘God is Dead’, whose book
The Antichrist
centered on the teachings of Paul that contradicted Jesus’:
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Paul is the incarnation of a type which is the reverse of that of the Savior; he is the genius in hatred, in the standpoint of hatred, and in the relentless logic of hatred…What he wanted was power; with St. Paul the priest again aspired to power, - he could make use only of concepts, doctrines, symbols with which masses may be tyrannized over, and with which herds are formed.”
So, I think, after this chapter, we can make four major conclusions:
1. Since Paul was alive and wrote his epistles well before the Gospels (Paul may possibly have also been lived during the same time as Jesus) and makes no mention of the vast majority of supernatural claims made in the Gospels; then the Gospels are BOGUS!
2. Since Paul makes no mention of the Gospel’s (Matthew & Luke) claim that Jesus was born of a virgin who was directly impregnated by God; then this story is BOGUS!
3. Since Paul only talked to Jesus in visions (and there is no testimony to corroborate his claims) it is highly likely, if not a given, that he was suffering from delusional psychosis. It is only because he is attached to a story where one has already had to accept that the supernatural is real that one would accept his testimony. Consider that if we were to meet Paul today, it is highly likely, no, it is bleeding obvious, we would have him committed to a mental institution… or placed him in the White House and called him a Bush.
4. Paul
is
the be all and end all of Christianity. The fact that I am writing this book is a testament to Paul’s work, not Jesus’. And because of Paul’s lack of detail or apparent knowledge of Jesus’ life and times and ministry and miracles, there is now serious doubt as to whether Jesus ever lived at all!
The over arching objective of any religion, new or old, is to grow and prosper. In other words, you need a constant and ready supply of fresh, brain-dead recruits to empty their pockets into the pretty purple velvet tithing baskets. Paul was clever enough to latch onto Jesus’ rapture prophecy and thus make the promise of heaven - central to his marketing strategy, and the Church has duly played its part in this in the centuries following this. This promise of the afterlife is what set Christianity apart from not only Judaism, but also other pagan religions in the fourth century that were flourishing under their own steam in these same regions.
Judaism, amongst others, invented sin. Until Moses told his Israelites that working or playing on the Sabbath was a sin on the footsteps of Mt Sinai, working or playing on the Sabbath was honky dory. Paul then tells his founding Christian members that believing Jesus died for their sins, having adopted the ancient ritual of ‘scapegoating’, will provide them passage to an eternal afterlife, fitted with mansions, 24/7 harp music and an endless supply of milk and honey. Too bad if you’re lactose intolerant! Anyway, there’s the sales hook for converting to Christianity, the promise you will live forever in paradise.
What about the downside for non-believers or unrepentant sinners? The unquenchable lakes of fire and brimstone of hell await, dear friend.
It is the doctrine of eternal damnation that provokes most of my ire towards the Gospel accounts of Jesus Christ. As we covered in chapter one, human suffering ended at the point of death… or at least that is what the Old Testament had to say on the matter. The unfortunate, the downtrodden, the huddled masses yearning to breath free could at least take comfort in the knowledge that their miserable earthly existence would eventually die… and be dead.
But then, along comes this big talking, grand promising Jesus, with his meek n’ mild gumption, who effectively says,
“Death is just the commencement of true suffering should you not heed the bullshit frothing forth from my face.”
In my opinion, there is no greater evil than this.
This evil surpasses any evil any human could possibly inflict upon another. An eternity of suffering is irreconcilable with any assertion that God, or Jesus, are the embodiments of love, compassion, and forgiveness. As Robert Ingersoll wrote:
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The myth of hell represents all the meanness, all the revenge, all the selfishness, all the cruelty, all the hatred, all the infamy of which the heart of man is capable.”
What Ingersoll was saying is that we created God in our image, and not the other way around. It’s a product created in the deepest, darkest and most vile pits of humanity’s imagination. With that said, it is most certainly a device of fiction; its sole purpose, to manipulate minds and behavior.
Albert Einstein famously opined the following in a 1955 New York Times article:
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I cannot imagine a God who rewards and punishes the objects of his creation, whose purposes are modeled after our own – a God, in short, who is but a reflection of the human family. Neither can I believe that the individual survives the death of his body, although feeble souls harbor such thoughts through fear or ridiculous egotisms.”
Does finite action or sin deserve infinite punishment? No, obviously not, and only a heinously wicked doctrine would suggest as much. This alone should be adequate to dismiss Jesus as a promoter of the dark, certainly not the light.
Hell is a destination fashioned in the depths of Jesus’ own depraved thinking, and I truly don’t know how to conceal my disgust for this utterly repugnant belief. It is a doctrine that is routinely thrust upon children at a very young age,
“If you don’t please Jesus, you will burn in hell forever, but remember he does love you.”
Ant this continuous fear mongering perpetrated against the children of every generation has left its mark. According to a 1990 Gallup Poll, more than 60% of Americans believe that there really is such a celestial city.
The brilliantly funny George Carlin one said on stage:
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When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told. Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there’s an invisible man living in the sky who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever ‘til the end of time! But He loves you.”
Carlin perfectly surmised my thoughts on hell. Speaking of eternity though, you can see that we could spend eternity disgusting the hidden immorality and abhorrence of Jesus’ teaching, but let’s take a closer look to see exactly who says what about ‘hell’ in the New Testament.
By my count there are 162 allusions to Hell throughout the twenty-seven books of the New Testament, for which 70 are attributed to Jesus directly. One could argue that Jesus spoke about Hell more than another topic based on his recorded teachings.
Hell itself, as in the word “Hell”, is mentioned twenty-four times:
Matthew: 12 times.
Mark: 3 times.
Luke: 5 times (including Acts).
John: 0.
Revelations: 4 times (which is attributed to the authorship of John).
Paul doesn’t mention Hell, or even the concept of eternal damnation at all; not once! But we will come to him in a moment. First, let’s look at what the Gospels recorded Jesus as having said on the matter.
John the Baptist was the first character of the New Testament to speak of Hell, and it’s his use of the phrase “unquenchable fire” that grabs the attention:
“
I baptize you with
water for repentance. But after me will come one who is more powerful than I, whose sandals I am not fit to carry. He will baptize you with the Holy Spirit and with fire. His winnowing fork is in his hand, and he will clear his threshing floor, gathering his wheat into the barn and burning up the chaff with unquenchable fire.” (Matthew 3:11-12 NIV)
John the Baptist is speaking to his gathered followers when he warns them of the arrival of the true ‘superstar’, who will work on behalf of God and separate the righteous from the sinners - the latter being thrown into everlasting fire. John the Baptist has opened the doorway to Hell, and Jesus gladly accepts the invitation. The following passage is the first time Jesus mentions Hell:
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You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘Do not murder,
and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with his brother
[
will be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to his brother, ‘Raca’ is answerable to the Sanhedrin. But anyone who says, ‘You fool!’ will be in danger of the fire of hell.” (Matthew 5:21-22 NIV)
Jesus uses better imagery than that in latter passages though, as evident:
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So shall it be at the end of the world: the angels shall come forth, and sever the wicked from among the just, and shall cast them into the furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth” (Matthew 13:49-50).
As mentioned earlier in this chapter, there are well over a hundred passages from scripture that reference the ‘Devil’s lair’ and most are attributed directly to Jesus. What is interesting about this is that Paul has an opposing view. Central to his ministry was the second coming and the end of times - whereby the righteous will ascend to heaven alongside Jesus - but he never exclaimed that sinners, doubters, evildoers, or George Bush, would be sent down stairs to play ‘hide the pineapple in your anus’ with Satan. It was Paul’s view that not ascending to Heaven to hang out with God and Jesus, and many large-breasted blonde women, was punishment enough. Paul simply puts it:
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They will be punished with everlasting destruction and shut out from the presence of the Lord and from the majesty of his power.” (2 Thessalonians 1:9 NIV)
This is more in line with an Old Testament view that death is the final everlasting destruction. The end. Game over. There is no eternal torture form Paul’s standpoint, there is simply nothing.
Who are we to believe? The Gospels alleged accounts of Jesus, or Paul?
Answering the above question aside, it still doesn’t get us out of interpretative purgatory because the Book of Revelation - attributed to the same author of the Gospel of John - decrees that only 144,000 Jewish men will enter the kingdom of Heaven, and thus enjoy an eternal life. Too bad for everyone outside of this select little group, and too bad for all non-Jews, which makes a mockery of Paul’s preaching to the Gentiles:
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Then I looked, and there before me was the Lamb, standing on Mount Zion, and with him 144,000 who had his name and his Father’s name written on their foreheads. And I heard a sound from heaven like the roar of rushing waters and like a loud peal of thunder. The sound I heard was like that of harpists playing their harps. And they sang a new song before the throne and before the four living creatures and the elders. No one could learn the song except the 144,000 who had been redeemed from the earth. These are those who did not defile themselves with women, for they kept themselves pure. They follow the Lamb wherever he goes. They were purchased from among men and offered as firstfruits to God and the Lamb.” (Revelation 14:1-4 NIV)
Now, many Christian apologists will try their best to convince you that this number, 144,000 Jews, is not to be taken literally. But why should we accept it only as a symbolic number when the rest of John’s writings suggest that he should be taken literally?
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I heard the number of those who were sealed, a hundred and forty-four thousand.” (John 7:4)
The number 144,000, we are told, equals 12,000 men multiplied by the twelve tribes of Israel. The phrase “those who were sealed” refers to a group of individuals who are selected from among mankind to rule with Jesus in Heaven. Moreover, the number, 144,000, is to be understood literally for several reasons. Firstly, John further describes seeing in his vision a second group of people:
