Just Between Us (17 page)

             
I laughed. “You can be a bit of a brat around the house, though.”

             
“It’s my dad … he brings the worst out in me.”

             
“Yeah we all saw that on ball night,” I said, eyes wide and a smirk on my face.

             
“I was crazy that night, Okay? Just forget about that. That wasn’t me, this is me.”

             
“If you say so.” I took a handful of popcorn and the lights went down for the film to start, just as Kyle moved in to whisper in my ear.

             
“If friends is all I get then I can handle that.” He fell back to his seat and I looked over to his serious face and swallowed hard. I wanted friends to be all he was going to get but looking at him there I wasn’t sure that it would ever be enough. If he was going to keep up the nice guy routine then that might make things even harder. I hoped today was about forgetting what we had done and moving forward, but perhaps it was far from that.

             
We stopped on the way home for pizza and Mum texted to say that she and Mick were going out for dinner with some friends. Kyle smiled when I told him, and I wondered if it was because we would be alone or that he hadn’t received a text informing him of where they would be. We got home around seven, and I sighed as we got inside.

             
“Well thanks for a great day.” I grinned.

             
“You’re welcome.”

             
“Well, I’ll go and get out of this dress and get some comfies on.”

             
“You need help?” Kyle asked, an eyebrow raised.

             
“Erm …” I stuttered, feeling flush.

             
“No funny business, I’ll just do the buttons. I won’t try anything, I promise.”

             
I nodded. “Oh, Okay then. Are you out tonight?”

             
“No,” he said, following me upstairs, “We can have a beer in the garden if you want?”

             
“Oh Okay.”

             
He put his hands on my shoulders following me up the stairs. “Soph?”

             
“Yep.”

             
“I don’t wanna get mushy or anything right? But the other night that wasn’t me, it was a crazy, jealous idiot who had no business being such a dick head. I’m not a fucking saint, but I want to make it right. Okay?”

             
“Okay.” I breathed.

             
“I’m not expecting you to forget or whatever, but I want you to know that I still want you. I’ll always want you, but if we can’t do that then I want us to be friends.”

             
We reached the top of the stairs, but I didn’t turn to look at him, my stomach was full of butterflies, and I wasn’t sure what to say. If he was asking me if I wanted him, then the answer would always be yes, but if I had to choose then it had to be a no. He may seem nice right now, and he was heartbreakingly good looking, but a secret relationship with my step-brother could only lead to heart ache. It was better to not let anything happen again.

             
I turned into him. “I believe you’re sorry.” I sighed, looking up into his eyes, “But me and you … that’s still a bad idea.”

             
“I know,” he said quietly, his eyes bored into mine and almost took my breath away. “The thing is Soph, you’re all I think about and I … I hate the way I fucked it up.”

             
“It had to end one day.” I shrugged, “I appreciate you trying to make it up to me, but you should see your friends, don’t take me places because you feel guilty. Seriously, no hard feelings.”

             
He placed his hands on the tops of my arms and moved closer to me, “I’m not doing this because I feel guilty, Soph, I’m doing this because I miss you … fuck Dave and Vinnie, Jesus. I miss you.”

             
I smiled shyly and broke my eyes away from him. I shook my head.

             
“What?” he whispered.

             
“This is so dangerous, Kyle, sex is one thing but when we have feelings …”

             
“You have feelings?” I looked up to him, anxious that he now thought I had feelings. Shit, I was letting my guard down, and I needed it desperately to protect me.

             
“I mean …” I began.

             
“I like you, Soph, it’s more than sex, Okay? I like you, you’re funny, crazy sexy, and I like just being together like this. Why can’t we do that?”

             
“Because Kyle, if I let myself like you and fall for you then where does that leave me in September. Heartbroken at university?”  

             
“We’re not related, we could …”

             
“No,” I cut him off, “It’s weird, it’s too weird, everyone would think it was creepy. No one can know,” I snapped.

             
“Fine.” He took his hands off me and held them up. I saw anger in his eyes again, but this time he didn’t shout. “Friends it is.” He smiled thinly.

             
I was so confused. I was relieved in one way, and disappointed in another. I wanted to decide and for it to be over, to not have to hide or sneak around anymore, but I also wanted him to fight for me. He had admitted that he felt something, that what we did had meant a little more to him than just sex, and I wanted him to show me. Deep inside I was relishing just how amazing he had made me feel, and here I was wishing he would kiss me. I wanted him to make me realise how much he wanted me but instead he was doing exactly as I asked, staying away.

             
“Come on, let’s get your buttons undone.” He turned me and pushed me forwards.

Fourteen
– Just stunning

Now

The
day at work with Kyle seemed to fly by. Geraldine wasn’t much of a conversationalist, but she managed to talk at me about her job and different clients to keep me entertained until lunch. There were also plenty of magazines in the office to leaf through, and the coffee machine hurled out a decent cup every so often. Just after twelve Kyle came out of his office into Geraldine’s open plan area.

             
“Ladies.” He grinned. Geraldine didn’t look up, but I snapped my head up, perhaps a little too eager to get out of there. “Shall we go grab some lunch?” he grinned, “I’m meeting Matt at twelve-thirty.”

             
“Where are you taking him? You two look pretty casual.” She cast an appraising glance over us.             

             
“Just a pub, I don’t have to wine and dine him, he’s already a client.”

             
“Okay.” She nodded. Kyle shook his head. There was definitely a story there as she acted more like his boss than the other way around.

             
“Come on Soph.” We made our way outside.

             
“She’s pretty bossy.” I laughed.

             
“I know, but she’s trustworthy, and I’ve known her a long time.”

             
“Ex-girlfriend?” I asked, my eyebrows raised.

             
“Jealous?” He grinned. I smiled at him and shook my head. “No,” He said as we climbed in the car, “just someone who I’ve known a long time and who knows me, not how much I’ve got in the bank.”

             
I nodded, “So how much is that exactly?” I teased.

             
He turned to me. “Enough to keep me happy.”

             
“Wow, that much?” I teased with a grin.

We drove to a nearby high street where we met Matt at a high-end pub full of sports memorabilia. We all ordered burgers and spent most of our lunch talking about all sorts, and it mostly revolved around Matt, I chatted easily. He was uber-trendy, wore a cap throughout the entire meal, and had some serious designer stubble. He told me what type of music he made and told me some songs he’d written for bands that I had heard of. He was easy to talk to and seemed to enjoy my wide-eyed interest. At one point Kyle sat back in his chair and watched on amused as I chattered easily with Matt. After an hour and a half, they organised some studio time, and Kyle paid the bill.

             
“Nice to meet you,” Matt said with a grin as he hugged me goodbye. “If we had girls like you in my home town I’d never have left home.”

             
I laughed and looked to Kyle who seemed amused. “Hands off Matt, see you in a couple of weeks.”

             
“See ya, mate.” Matt shook Kyle’s hand and pulled him into a man hug.

             
We got to the car and buckled up. “Was that even a business meeting?” I asked, confused, “It was just like lunch between friends.”

             
“Ah.” He looked to me, “Most of my job is about keeping people happy and keeping them onside, so I keep him happy, and he comes to me with his business. He’s usually really whiny, and I knew you’d win him over.”

             
“Him … whiny? He was all charm.”

             
“Because of you.” Kyle nodded, “He liked you, and it worked to my advantage, I touched base with him and didn’t have to deal with any of his tantrums.”

             
“He doesn’t seem high maintenance.”

             
“Well they all are.” He rubbed the back of his head with his hand as he navigated the busy traffic, “All artists are bloody prima donnas.”

             
“Really?” I laughed

             
“Yep.”

             
“So you used me to distract him? That was a gamble don’t you think?” I raised an eyebrow.

             
“How so?”

             
“Well I’m hardly everyone’s type.”

             
“I think you underestimate how amazing you look in faded jeans and trainers, if he saw you dressed up, that bloody cap would have blown off.”

             
I laughed heartily, “Kyle. You always know how to make me laugh.”

             
“And you still haven’t realised how gorgeous you are.” My breath caught on his words, choking the laughter, and I looked to his serious face.

             
“Thanks.” I nodded and looked out of the window.

             
“Soph?” I looked to him, “Did I say something wrong?”

             
“No.” I shook my head and gave him a reassuring smile. “The problem is you’re the only one who ever says it right.” He nodded because he knew what I was saying. We both wanted what could never be. Kyle made me feel like the only girl in every room, wherever he took me and with whomever it was. I trusted him, trusted that he’d never make me feel uncomfortable or that if he said a lunch out with a client would be fun, that it would be. No one else seemed to have this gift. He just had the knack to make every day feel like Christmas, or was that because I just wanted to be wherever he was? Was he like this with everyone or was he just like this with me?

I spent the afternoon with Geraldine trying to find a dress for that night, although it was obvious that she wasn’t much into fashion or dresses. She waited outside most of the shops making calls on her mobile. I eventually found something at the third shop; it was a small boutique shop run by a scatty woman who wore lots of eyeliner and had thick black hair falling all over her face. The dress was a one-off made by a little known designer and was perfect for what I wanted, maybe a little pricey, but I deserved it. It was gold with a sweetheart neck, cut to the mid-thigh and hugged my curves. It had diamante scattered all over the bodice in a pattern that tapered off towards the skirt. I also purchased some matching shoes and a handbag, to save Geraldine’s sanity more than anything, as I didn’t think she could handle scouring another shop for something better.

             
“All done?” She smiled thinly as we left.

             
“Yep.” I nodded as we made our way to her car.

             
As we drove back to the studio she seemed restless, and the silence became uncomfortable, “Is something wrong?” I asked as we stopped at some traffic lights. She shook her head, but there was that tight smile again. “If there is just say it,” I snapped.

             
“It’s just Kyle, um I … he seems happy and relaxed and …”

             
“What?”

             
“I just hope you like him for more than his money, because he seems different with you and …”

             
“Let’s get this straight,” I began, “I have my own money, and Kyle did not pay for this dress, right?”

             
She began to drive again as the lights changed but didn’t speak.

             
“And Kyle and I have known each other for a very long time, longer than you two have known each other Okay? And if he’s happy to see me great, but there is nothing going on between the two of us … not that it’s any of your business.”

             
“You’re right.” She sniffed, “It’s none of my business.” She shook her head. “But I’m not sure he knows that there is nothing going on between you. He’s like a teenager in love.”

             
I laughed heartily and looked over to her. “He knows, we both know.”

             
She nodded again. “I worry about him, that’s all.”

             
“You mean you worry about him being distracted?”

             
“No, I’ve never seen him like this, and I think if I ever changed this much for someone, then to lose them would be heartbreaking.”

             
“Change?” I scoffed. “This is how he always is.”

             
“Maybe to you.” She sighed. “But to be honest he’s usually a moody pain in the arse.”             

             
“Really?” I couldn’t believe it, but I suppose he did used to be like that at home as a teenager but only around his dad, and that was for obvious reasons. “I suppose I’ve seen him moody.”

             
She nodded. “Well, don’t tell him I spoke to you, but it’s nice to see him like this, how long are you sticking around?”

             
“Oh, I’m only here for the summer, I’ve got to get back to work and my life.”

             
She nodded grimly, “So I better prepare myself.” I laughed assuming she was joking, but she eyed me warily. Kyle was closest to her here in London it seemed, and she didn’t know him like I did, it seemed strange, but I suppose I had no idea about the man he had become. I assumed that he made everyone’s life fun, not just mine, although, I only knew the Kyle from ten years ago, and I was thrilled to have him back. This woman mustn’t know that I am his step-sister, or else she wouldn’t have assumed we were together. If she had never heard of me, his family, or his life in Lytham, then who had? Why was Kyle’s life here so secluded? It must be the business he was in or the hectic lifestyle. No one had gotten close to him, and it was such a shame as he had so much to give. I turned away from Geraldine for the rest of the journey and tried to focus on the excitement I had felt before for the night ahead. I focused on getting dressed up, attending the club opening, and being the centre of Kyle’s attention once again. It was addictive living in his spotlight, and I didn’t want to be reminded by Geraldine about when I was giving that up just yet.

             
We arrived back at the studio a little while later, Geraldine made her way to her desk, and I poked my head in Kyle’s office. He was on the phone and held a finger up to me, to indicate one minute. I leant on the door-post and watched him.

             
“Of course Jeff, any time, bring him down and I’ll see what I can do.” He threw his head back and laughed, how could Geraldine say that he was moody? He was the king of “everything to everybody,” and he could charm the birds out of the trees. It was his job to be always switched on and ready for action. “Okay see you tonight, yes, thanks, bye.” He hung up and stood.

             
“So did you get something?”

             
“Yep.” I grinned, “I’ve never bought so many new clothes in such a short space of time before.”

             
“Well let me see.” He motioned to the bags I held.

             
“No.” I shook my head, “The big reveal will be at approximately seven pm tonight.”

             
“Wow, can’t wait.” He powered his computer down and then set his desk straight, putting a few things away. “We’re going, Geraldine,” he shouted as we walked through her office.

             
“Okay,” she grunted, “I’ll stay a little later, I didn’t get much done today.” I didn’t miss the subtle blame as she looked at us over her glasses.

             
“Thanks for taking me,” I said politely. I could have gone alone, but she did insist on taking me, and so I may as well be grateful.

             
“You’re welcome.” Her eyes snapped back to her computer. “See you bright and early tomorrow,” she said soberly to Kyle.

             
“Well maybe not so early.” He rolled his eyes to me, and we walked towards the door.

             
When we got home I jumped straight in the shower, and Kyle prepared something for us to eat in between getting ready, insisting that we line our stomachs. I showered and washed my hair and came into the open plan living area wearing cotton shorts, a vest and my wet hair down my back in order to paint my nails.

             
“What are we having?” I asked as I headed to the sofa, getting out some sparkly polish for my toes.

             
“Mexican chicken and couscous.”

             
“Impressive,” I said with a smile, turning to see him hard at work in the kitchen.

             
“It’s just packet stuff,”

             
“Oh, don’t ruin the magic.” I laughed, getting cotton wool positioned between my toes to start applying the polish. Kyle approached with a full glass of wine for me and watched with interest.

             
“What are you doing?”

             
“You know. Separating the toes, so I can paint them, and not get any on the other toes.”

             
“Wow, that’s an actual process?”

             
“Don’t tell me you’ve never seen a girl do this before?” I asked.