Just Imagine (18 page)

Cain slouched into the chair behind the desk, propped his heels on the mahogany surface, and crossed his ankles. His posture was deliberately insolent, but she didn't let him see that it annoyed her. Earlier that afternoon when she'd been veiled, he'd treated her as a woman. Now he wanted to treat her as his stable boy. He'd soon see it wouldn't be that easy to ignore the years that had passed.

"i told you to stay in New York," he said.

"So you did." She pretended to study the room. "That portrait of Mr. Lincoln is out of place at Risen Glory. It insults my father's memory."

"From what I hear, your father insulted his own memory."

"True. But he was still my father, and he died bravely."

"There's nothing brave about death." The angular planes of his face grew harsh in the dim lamplight of the room. "Why did you disobey my orders and leave New York?"

"Because your orders were unreasonable."

"I don't have to explain myself."

"So you seem to think. I fulfilled our agreement."

"Did you? Our agreement was for you to conduct yourself properly."

"I completed my time at the Academy."

"It's not your activities at the Academy that concern me." Without taking his feet from the desktop, he leaned forward and extracted a letter from a drawer. Then he slapped it on the desk. "Interesting reading, although I wouldn't want to show it to anyone who's easily shocked."

She picked it up. Her stomach twisted when she saw the signature.
Hamilton Woodward
.

It is my sad duty to report that last Easter, while a guest in our house, your ward behaved in a manner so shocking, I can barely report it. On the evening of our annual dinner party, Katharine brazenly attempted to seduce one of my partners. Fortunately, I interrupted in time. The poor man was stunned. He has a wife and children, and is prominent in local charities. Her wanton behavior makes me fear that she might be afflicted with the sickness of nymphomania…

She crumpled the letter and threw it on his desk. She had no idea what nymphomania was, but it sounded horrible. "This letter's a lie. You can't believe it."

"I was reserving judgment until I had a chance to travel to New York at the end of the summer and speak with you personally. That was why I told you to stay where you were."

"We had an agreement. You can't set that aside just because Hamilton Woodward is a fool."

"Is he?"

"Yes." She felt the color burning in her cheeks.

"You're telling me you don't make a habit of offering your favors?"

"Of course not."

His eyes drifted to her mouth, forcing her to recall what had happened between them only a few hours earlier.

"If this letter's such a lie," he said quietly, "how do you explain slipping into my arms so easily this afternoon? Was that your idea of proper conduct?"

She didn't know how to defend something she couldn't understand herself, so she went on the attack. "Maybe you're the one who should explain. Or do you always assault the young women who come into this house?"

"Assault?"

"Consider yourself lucky I was fatigued by my journey," she said as haughtily as she could manage. "Otherwise my fist would have ended up in your belly. Which is what I did to Mr. Woodward's friend." He dropped his feet to the carpet. "I see." He didn't believe her. "It's interesting that you're so concerned about my behavior, but you don't seem to be giving any thought to your own."

"It's not the same thing. You're a woman."

"Ah, I see. And that makes a difference?" He looked prickly. "You know exactly what I mean."

"If you say so."

"I say you're going back to New York!"

"And I say I'm not."

"It isn't up to you to decide."

That was truer than she could bear to admit, and she thought quickly "You want to get rid of me, isn't that right? And put an end to this ridiculous guardianship?"

"More than you'll ever know."

"Then you'll let me stay at Risen Glory."

"Forgive me if I don't see the connection." She tried to speak calmly. "There are several gentlemen who wish to marry me. I simply need a few weeks to make up my mind which one I'm going to choose."

His face clouded. "Make up your mind in New York."

"How can I? It's been a confusing three years, and this is the most important decision of my life. I have to consider it carefully, and I need familiar surroundings to do that. Otherwise I'll never be able to decide, and neither of us wants that." The explanation was thin at best, but she gave it all the sincerity she could muster.

His glower grew darker. He moved toward the fireplace. "Somehow I can't see you as a devoted wife."

She couldn't see herself that way either, but still his comment offended her. "I don't know why not." She summoned an image of Lilith Shelton as she'd held court with her opinions about men and marriage. "Marriage is what every woman wants., isn't it?" She adopted the same wide-eyed vacuousness she'd seen so often on her former classmate's face. "A husband to take care of her, pretty clothes, a piece of jewelry on her birthday. What more could a woman want from life?"

Cain's eyes grew wintry. "Three years ago when you were my stable boy, you were a thorn in my side, but you were brave and hardworking. That Kit Weston wouldn't have been interested in selling herself for clothes and jewelry."

"That Kit Weston hadn't been forced by her guardian to attend a finishing school devoted to turning young girls into wives."

She'd made her point. He reacted with a bored shrug and leaned against the mantelpiece. "It's all in the past."

"That past has molded who I am now." She took a deep breath. "I intend to marry, but I don't want to make the wrong choice. I need time, and I'd like to have that time here."

He studied her. "These young men…" His voice dropped in pitch and developed an unsettling huskiness. "Do you kiss them like you kissed me yesterday?"

She needed all her willpower not to look away. "It was the fatigue from my journey. They're much too gentlemanly to have pressed themselves as you did."

"Then they're fools."

She wondered what he meant by that. He moved away from the fireplace. "Very well. You can have one month, but if you haven't made up your mind by then, you're going back to New York, husband or not. And another thing…" He tilted his head toward the hallway. "That crazy woman has to go. Let her rest for a day, then put her on the train. I'll make sure she's compensated."

"No! I can't."

"Yes, you can."

"I promised her."

"That was your mistake."

He looked so unbending. What argument could she offer that would convince him? "I can't stay here without a chaperone."

"It's a little late to worry about respectability."

"Perhaps for you, but not for me."

"I don't think she'll be much of a chaperone. As soon as any of the neighbors talk to her, they'll realize she's crazy as a loon."

Kit rose in hot defense. "She's not crazy!"

"You could have fooled me."

"She's just a little… different."

"More than a little." Cain regarded her suspiciously. "Just how did she get the idea that I was General Lee?"

"I… might have inadvertently mentioned something."

"You told her I was General Lee?"

"No, of course not. She was afraid to meet you, and I was trying to tease her into a better mood. I had no idea she'd take me seriously." Kit explained what had happened when she went to Miss Dolly's room.

"And now you expect me to go along with this charade?"

"It won't be hard," Kit pointed out reasonably. "She does most of the talking."

"That's not good enough."

"It'll have to be." She hated pleading with him, and the words nearly stuck in her throat. "Please. She doesn't have anyplace else to go."

"Damn it, Kit! I don't want her here."

"You don't want me here, either, but you're letting me stay. What difference does one more person make?"

"A big difference." His expression turned calculating. "You want a lot from me, but I haven't heard you offer anything in return."

"I'll exercise your horses," she said quickly.

"I was thinking of something more personal."

She swallowed. "I'll mend your clothes."

"You were more imaginative three years ago. Of course, you weren't as… experienced then as you are now. Do you remember the night you offered to be my mistress?"

She slid the tip of her tongue over her dry lips. "I was desperate."

"How desperate are you now?"

"This discussion is highly improper," she managed to reply with all the starch of Elvira Templeton.

"Not as improper as that kiss this afternoon." He came closer, and his voice was low, slightly husky. For a moment she thought he was going to kiss her again. Instead, his lips curled into a smile full of mockery. "Miss Dolly can stay for now. I'll make up my mind later how you can repay me."

As he left the room, she stared at the door and tried to decide whether she'd won or lost.

That night, Cain lay motionless in the dark, one arm crooked behind his head, and stared at the ceiling. What kind of game had he been playing with her this evening? Or was she the one playing the game?

Her kiss this afternoon had made it clear she was no innocent, but was she as wanton as Woodward's letter would have him believe? He didn't know. For now, he would simply have to wait and watch.

In his mind he saw a wild-rose mouth with bruised, petal-soft lips, and desire rushed through him, hot and thick.

One thing he knew for certain. The time when he could regard her as a child was gone forever.

   9

Kit was up early the next morning despite her restless night. She pulled on khaki britches that would have scandalized Elsbeth, then shrugged into a boy's shirt and drew it closed over her lace-edged chemise. She regretted the shirt's long sleeves, but her arms would be brown as a butternut if she left them exposed to the sun. She consoled herself that the white material was as thin and fine as the fabric of her undergarments and would undoubtedly be cool.

She tucked her shirttails into her britches and fastened the short row of buttons snugly over the front. As she drew on her boots, she enjoyed the way the soft brown leather molded to her feet and calves. They were the first pair of good riding boots she'd ever owned, and she couldn't wait to try them out.