“It's okay. Thanks again.” She shut the door and took Daniel's hand, leading him up onto the sidewalk.
Ezra waited a moment for them to get clear of the vehicle before he backed it up into the street. He gave them both one last small wave. Then he was gone.
* * *
Ezra drummed his fingers against the steering wheel as he drove home. He was going to get a lot of flak over Sadie. He could see it coming in the surprised gleam in his mother's eyes and the twisted smirk Logan had given him. Why couldn't two people be just friends? Why did everybody have to put romantic labels on everything if two different genders were involved? It was ridiculous, really.
The moment she had touched his lips with the napkin, something exploded inside him. He wasn't sure what. He'd never felt that way before. But he felt a little dejected when she moved away. What was he supposed to make of that?
That he was attracted to Sadie. But that didn't mean anything. Sure, she was the only girl to spark his interest in a long time. Maybe even ever. But that didn't mean he could act on it. And so what if he did? The Amish and the Mennonites alike talked about not judging, then they proceeded to judge each other to a fault. If he wanted to see Sadie again, why should he not?
Friends and family alike would have trouble with any relationship he might forge with Sadie Kauffman. He was pretty sure his mother didn't want him dating anyone. Since his father had left, she relied heavily on him to take care of things. She couldn't remarry since her husband was still alive, though as far as they knew he could be dead, remarried, or living in another country. They hadn't heard from him since he walked out seven years ago. In that aspect, Ezra couldn't blame her for being a little bitter. He himself had hard feelings toward his father. Jakob had treated them both unfairly, walking out without a word or any communication since that date.
But Ezra wasn't thinking about marrying Sadie Kauffman. He had too much on his hands at the ranch, too many things he still wanted to do. Aside from the issues of their faith, he had too many responsibilities as it was to add another. But that didn't mean he couldn't spend time with her. After all, he'd already told her he'd pick her up next Saturday and bring her sister out to the ranch. Now he had to figure out what to do with the desire to see her again until then.
* * *
“Sadie! There you are!” Chris pushed out of the restaurant and hustled to her side. He'd been waiting for a while now. Waiting on her to come back from this unplanned excursion.
“Yes, here I am.” Sadie looked down at her brother. “Daniel, why don't you go on in the restaurant?”
Daniel nodded and did as she bade, leaving Chris the privacy he needed to find out exactly what was going on.
“Is that the Mennonite?” He nodded toward the blue truck rolling down the street. “The one from the market?”
“Yes.” A frown worked its way across Sadie's brow. Chris hadn't meant to get her on the defensive. She'd said that she wasn't marrying him when he returned from Europe, but what was she doing running around with a Mennonite guy on a Saturday night?
“Is that why you came here?” Sadie asked. “To find out if he was the Mennonite?”
Chris shook his head. He was making a mess of this. “No, it's Rook night.” He and Sadie along with William and Hannah had started playing Rook on Saturday nights. It was a fun time to get together and enjoy each other's company, and he wasn't about to let a Mennonite come between them. They might not have plans to get married, but she was still his best friend.
“Right.” She gave a quick nod, as if she had known that all along, but Chris knew that she had forgotten.
“What's gotten into you, Sadie?” He did his best to keep his tone soft and even and not filled with the frustration he felt.
“Nothing,” she said, though she crossed her arms and tucked her hands under, a sure sign that she was unhappy.
“I don't believe you.” Was it too much to ask to have an honest answer? He wasn't the one running around with strange Mennonites when he already had plans with her.
For a moment she looked like she was about to blow, then she deflated like a balloon with a small pinhole in one side. “Things are changing. You're leaving and . . .”
“Is that why you're hanging out with another guy? A Mennonite?”
“Why do you keep saying that? Mennonite. Like it's a disease instead of a religion.”
Chris couldn't explain. And he wasn't about to. Sadie knew the differences. She knew what was at stake if she were to become further involved with this Ezra guy. “I don't want to see you get hurt.” Yeah. That sounded a lot better than what he really wanted to say. But the words didn't sit well with Sadie.
Her back stiffened, and though her arms fell, it was only to prop themselves on her hips as she glared at him. “You don't want me to get hurt? That's ironic.”
At times like these he felt like he was floundering in dark waters and had forgotten how to swim. “I'm worried about you, Sadie.”
She paused for a second, and at first he thought she might lose some of the blazing anger that surrounded her like waves of heat in the summertime. “Go to Europe, Chris. Have fun.”
“Is that what this is all about?”
She didn't answer. Nor did she meet his gaze. A sure sign if he ever saw one.
“It is. You're mad at me because I'm going to Europe?” They had been friends forever, best friends. Why did she pick now to go all wacky on him?
“How did you expect me to feel?”
How indeed?
“Everyone thinks we're getting married now as it is. Then you're going to go traipsing off to Europe, you'll probably never come back, I'll be left behind. Spinster Sadie. At least I can take care of Daniel.”
Chris shook his head, trying to get this thoughts to settle. But he only succeeded in sending them knocking around his head once more.
She'd thought they would get married. And maybe they would have. Sadie was a fine woman, hardworking, sweet as pie, even if she wasn't what most would call a beauty. She was easy enough on the eyes, he supposed. Maybe a bit plain. She would make some man a wonderful wife someday. But he never thought about her being
his
wife. Not truly.
Tears sparkled in her hazel eyes, and she bit her lip. Something funny happened to his stomach. She deserved better than what he had just handed her.
He took one of her hands into his, grabbing her fingers as if he needed to memorize every curve, bump, and knuckle. “Sadie,” he gently said. “You are the best friend I've ever had. And if I were staying in Wells Landing, I would want nothing more than for you to be my wife.”
Chapter Six
Somehow Sadie made it through the next few days without constantly thinking about Chris's declaration. So he didn't actually confess his love. But he cared about her. How could he not? They had been friends for so long. But as disturbing as his words were to her heart, they were calming at the same time. She might still end up a spinster, but at least she would know that someone had cared enough to want to make her his wife. That was something. Wasn't it?
Thursday afternoon came, and Sadie was waiting for Cora Ann to get in from school. She was due anytime. In fact, she was a little late, which meant she had stopped off at the library to see if any new cookbooks were delivered this week.
Sadie smiled to herself at her sister's love of all things culinary, and once again she wished she had something in her life that she could be so passionate about. Something other than Daniel.
Their young brother had not taken well to Lorie leaving the Amish. Or maybe it was because she left so soon after they lost their father. But Daniel had cried for Lorie for days, finally taking up with Sadie and barely letting her out of his sight. She didn't mind really; with Chris heading off to Europe soon, she would have plenty enough time on her hands to take care of Daniel and work her regular shifts at the restaurant.
The bell over the door jangled as Cora Ann came into the restaurant, string backpack flung across her shoulders. As usual, her eyes were bright and sparkling. Simply being at the restaurant seemed to make her happier. Sadie wished she could say the same for herself. Not that it mattered. She was headed home to meet Daniel's bus and get supper started for everyone before heading off to the bowling alley. Thursday was their usual night, and though they had lost Jonah and Lorie, the three couples still met to have fun. Sadie tried not to think about the day in the future when Chris would be gone and she would be the fifth wheel at the alley.
“Anything exciting happen today?” Cora Ann asked as she washed her hands at the waitress station sink.
Sadie shook her head. “Not unless you consider mashed potatoes interesting.”
“Well, if you added a touch of rosemary and garlic . . .”
Sadie shook her head and laughed. “This restaurant's lucky to have you, you know that, Cora Ann?”
Cora Ann dimpled in return. She dried her hands on a towel and tied an industrial apron around her waist to protect her dress from her restaurant work. “You headed home?”
Sadie nodded. She had just enough time to meet the bus and get Daniel his after-school snack, then get ready for bowling. Everyone could eat when they got home.
The phone rang and Cora Ann, still tying her apron behind her, rushed toward the front desk to answer it. Sadie wadded up her apron and threw it in the dirty clothes hamper right inside the office door as Cora Ann called out to her. “It's for you. It's Chris.”
Very rarely did Chris call her at the restaurant. The Flauds had a phone in their barn, but more often than not Chris was more interested in studying world maps than talking on the phone.
Sadie brushed off the front of her dress and made her way to the front where Cora Ann waited, the receiver pressed against her shoulder as if to mute the sound.
“Is everything okay?” she asked. “He sounds sort of weird.”
“I have no idea.” Sadie held out her hand for the receiver. There was only one way to find out. “Hello?”
“Sadie, it's Chris. Listen, I can't make it tonight. Something's come up.” He did sound sort of weird, distracted, and Sadie wondered what was going on. Had his family somehow found out about his plans to go to Europe?
“You can't make bowling?” She had wanted her voice to sound even, maybe even concerned. So much for that.
“I'm really sorry.” His tone backed up his sentiments, and Sadie immediately felt remorse over her harsh tone.
“It's okay. Is everything okay with you?”
“Yeah, just some family things that I have to take care of.”
Sadie looked around to see if anyone was listening in.
Mamm
was in the family booth rolling silverware. Cora Ann was filling up the ice bin and getting ready for the dinner crowd. No one was paying her any mind. “This isn't about Europe, is it?”
“No,” Chris said, though his voice choked a little at the end. Something was definitely going on. “I can't make it is all.”
“I understand.” She didn't really, but what was she supposed to say? If they were such good friends, why couldn't he confide in her what was going on in his life? Why did he just leave her hanging?
She sighed. It seemed the more they tried to pull together, the more they ended up being pushed apart. She hated it. If they couldn't survive in Wells Landing together, how could they ever make it through him going to Europe?
* * *
After she got home, Sadie made Daniel a snack and waited for his bus to arrive. He came in, all smiles and hugs as he usually was, a bright ray of sunshine in a gray January world. Sadie shook off those thoughts. She was letting things get to her, and she shouldn't. Chris, Lorie leaving, all of it seemed to be building on her and weighing her down, making her wish things were different, when she knew better. She'd have to pray about that tonight, not trusting God to give her what she needed. But how could He know what she needed when she didn't even know herself? She almost laughed out loud at her ridiculous thought. This was God she was talking about; He knew everything. The problem was could she recognize what she needed when God provided, if she didn't know what it was now?
Daniel swung his feet under the table as he ate his cheese and crackers. “It's bowling night,” he said.
Sadie smiled. He might not be able to recite the days of the week in order, but he knew Thursday was the night she and Chris went bowling. “Yes, it is. But I'm not going. Not tonight.” She had called Hannah before she left, leaving a message at the phone shanty just down from her house. There would only be the two couples there tonight at the lanes, seeing as how they hadn't replaced Jonah and Lorie yet. But even two couples could have fun bowling.
“Why not?” Daniel's head bobbed again as he continued to swing his legs.
“I don't have anybody to bowl with.”
“Ezra.” Bob, bob, bob.
Her heart started to beat at the sound of his name. She unhitched her breath and looked at her brother. “Ezra?”
Daniel nodded, and along with the kicking of his feet the action was almost dizzying. “You like him,
jah?
”
More than I should.
“Then go bowling with him.”
Daniel continued swinging his feet, eating his crackers, and otherwise looking around as if he hadn't said anything momentous. She could ask Ezra. Why not? If he liked bowling, surely he would come. And then she wouldn't have to miss. They could have a good time. And everyone would be happy. Right?
Sadie smiled at Daniel. “That's a good idea. I'll go call him now.”
* * *
Ezra was pitching the alfalfa hay down from the hayloft when his phone started buzzing in his pocket. It went off periodically during the day, with most people leaving a voice mail message for him about meat that they wanted, special orders, and the other various products and services he had on his ranch. But something possessed him to look at the screen this time. He took off his leather work gloves, slapped them against one hip, then tucked them into the back pocket of his jeans. He fished out the phone and looked at the screen. It was a 918 number, but that wasn't saying anything. Most of his customers were local. He hesitated a bit longer before deciding to answer the phone.
“Hello?”
“Ezra?”
Sadie. “Yes?” He wasn't sure why he acted like he didn't recognize her voice. Despite the fact that they could only be friends, it wasn't a good idea to let her know exactly how much he liked her.
“This is Sadie Kauffman. I wanted to thank you again for giving me and Daniel a tour of your ranch.”
Surely that wasn't why she had called. He hoped it wasn't. She'd thanked him four or five times on Saturday. And it was really no big deal. He enjoyed spending time with Sadie. There was a calmness about her that spread into his bones, even though an energy followed her wherever she went. It was a strange and interesting combination that he wanted to stand next to always. “You're welcome out here anytime.”
“And we're still on for Saturday with Cora Ann, right?”
“Of course.” He was excited at the opportunity to see her again. Even though he knew he shouldn't be, he was looking forward to it.
“That's not why I called.”
Ezra smiled. “Yeah?”
“Do you like to bowl?”
It was perhaps the last thing he expected her to ask. And that was surely why it took him a moment to answer. But just in case . . . “Like in an alley? On lanes?”
“Is there any other kind?”
Ezra shook his head. “I guess not.”
“So do you?”
“Do I what?”
“Like to bowl?”
“Yes. Of course. But I'm not any good.”
Sadie laughed. “You don't have to be good. Just breathing.”
“I think I qualify.”
Her chuckle came across the line again, and he realized that he'd do almost anything to hear that sound. “Do you want to go tonight? My normal bowling partner can't make it, and I hate to let my group down.”
Ezra stood still for a second, letting the question wash over him. Had she just asked him out on a date?
“I mean, it's only bowling, right? Nothing else. Unless . . . I mean, I think it would be fun if you came, but you don't have to. Never mind, it was a dumb idea.”
“No, no, no, and don't hang up, Sadie. Of course I'd like to go bowling with you. What time?”
“We usually start at seven.”
“Pick you up at six thirty?”
“That's okay, I can take the buggy andâ”
“And drive home after dark. I'll come get you in my truck.”
“Okay,” she said. “See you at six thirty?”
“I'll be there.”
* * *
The moment Sadie heard his truck rumbling down the road, she grabbed her bag and rushed out the door. After she had gotten off the phone with Ezra, she called Hannah back with her change of plans. Thankfully, this was
Mamm
's day to work the open-to-close shift at the restaurant. Sadie didn't want to hide the fact that she and Ezra were going bowling together, mainly because there was nothing to hide. But she surely didn't want to try to explain that to her mother. Not after Lorie left.
Lorie's discoveries about their father and the double life that he'd been leading had almost torn the family completely apart. Lorie had wanted to go off to Tulsa and experience the
Englisch
world like her father had known, but
Mamm
was not having any of it. She told Lorie straight out if she went to the
Englisch
world, she wasn't welcome back in their home. Never mind that Lorie hadn't joined the church and couldn't technically be shunned.
Mamm
was just like that, a little on the stern side and very much concerned with the actions of all of her children. It was a good thing to be loved as much as Maddie Kauffman loved her children, but Sadie had no doubts that their sister Melanie had gotten married so young simply to get out of the house and out from underneath
Mamm
's thumb.
Cora Ann had come home from the restaurant to watch after Daniel while Sadie went bowling. As she had expected, Cora Ann had stopped by the library and checked out a couple of new cookbooks. Sadie caught sight of
Your Double Boiler and You: A Hundred and One Recipes You Never Thought to Make
and
All About Pies
before she hustled out the door to meet Ezra.
He turned down the drive when she cleared the porch. She raced toward him, the strings of her prayer
kapp
flying out behind her as she ran.
“Hi,” he said with a smile as she came around the passenger side.
“Hi,” she returned. She was staring at him like a young girl with a serious crush.
“Are you going to ride with me the rest of the way to the house?”
She shook her head. “There's no need to go back to the house.”
A small frown furrowed his brow. “I don't need to meet your mother?” She had told him all about her father's death the day they were out at the ranch. He'd understood and nodded, apparently figuring out there had been a death since she was always wearing black. A few more months of that, and she could go back to wearing her favorite blue.
“She's at work.” Sadie reached for the door handle, hoping he'd let the matter drop. “Besides, this isn't really a date.”
The words gave him pause, then he nodded. “Right. Bowling.”
She slid into the cab of his truck. “Just bowling,” she repeated.
Ezra looked into his mirrors and backed the truck out into the street before starting them toward town once again. “Buckle up,” he said, nodding pointedly at her seat belt.
“Of course.” She wrapped the thin strap around her and snapped it into place. With all the work they did at the restaurant, she hardly ever traveled by car. That was why she didn't remember to buckle her seat belt. It had nothing to do with those dark brown eyes that were smiling at her from across the truck cab.
“So who are we bowling with again?”
“There's William and Hannah Lapp. They got married this past October. And Ruthie and Mark Chupp.”
“Let me guess, they're not brother and sister.”