Kahleena MacCarthy ~ To Meet a Highlander (8 page)

“I’ll not have you wait on me. I’m no one special and can handle my own bath. I’ll be down later.”

“Oh, m’lady, ye may verra well be able to do yer bath, but ye’ll never get into the dress and stays. That is most impossible for one person. I’m happy to help. I’m to be yer ladies maid according to Argus. So, I’ll be by yer side for whatever ye wish of me.”

Tsarina signed in resignation. “Would you at least stop calling me m’lady?”

“Oh no, m’lady. It’d not be proper.”

With that Tsarina gave into her fate of being bathed by someone else and dressed as though she were an infant.

Privacy was a thing of her past.

****

              By the time Igrid was leading her downstairs for dinner, she realized that Zarik had avoided her as if she were a four-headed dragon. Niall and Argus continued to welcome her and basically hold her hostage. They had both stopped in to check on her in the hours between arrival and the late dinner. There would be no way to convince either to help her go back.

             
Igrid had been nothing other than under her feet. She’d never get used to that. The girl had even suggested a nap,
as ladies do get tired
. Really? She should have tried that with her boss.

             
Her boss. What would she do here to keep her busy? She could research, but how would she ever share her findings? Would they even let her nose around? Weren’t people of this time paranoid about what they considered nosy? She’d likely find herself drawn and quartered. Would her boss even remember she was employed there if she remained in this time?

             
What was she saving Zarik from? And why did she care that he avoided her? Could it really be that important to history that the two of them wed?

             
Tsarina never believed in fate or love at first site. If it didn’t work with someone, there was someone else waiting later on. There was no one person as everyone seemed intent on convincing her. Shouldn’t she feel sparks? Or be unable to breathe in his presence? She had to admit, he was hot. A romp between the sheets would be fun. But love? He seemed more of a beast, albeit an attractive one.

****

              Zarik saw Igrid and Tsarina coming down the stairs. She looked lovely in his mother’s blue silk dress. Her hair was partially pulled up with some hanging lose in the back and on the sides. She looked absolutely lovely. Although, she seemed to have no jewelry. She’d need a few necklaces.

             
He shook his head wondering why her lack of jewelry would bother him. Perhaps it was because his mother had always had an abundance of trinkets and jewels that she claimed she didn’t need or want yet cherished every piece his father spoiled her with.

             
Annoyed, he realized that Torradan had gotten up and was approaching her, hand out to show her to her seat. Where would she sit? Zarik spared a glance over to his father who looked just as mesmerized by her appearance as he had.

             
Torradan placed a kiss on her hand and placed her arm in his as he lead her the rest of the way down the stairs.

Niall cleared his throat loud enough to allow him to motion the two of them toward him. “She’ll sit at our table with us, Torradan. After all, she’s soon to be family. Tsarina, we’ll seat you between Torradan and Zarik. The two of ye,” Niall looked pointedly at Zarik. “need to get to know one another. I’m looking forward to publicly announcing the betrothal.”

The man’s smile was warm and Tsarina found herself not being able to argue with him.

“There is no betrothal father. We’ll be sending her back to the Fraser’s.” Zarik took a drink of ale and slammed the cup on the table.

“There is no way to send her back, lad. Even if we could, we’d not. Ye need her. We need her. Ye’ll see. Now why not propose? It’s a good match and people have married knowing one another less. Love will grow. It did for yer mother and I. I approve of the match, so ye may ask her any time.” Niall was convinced this was the woman Argus had spoken of for years. He didn’t want to waste time. There were grandchildren to be had and a clan to hand over to his son. How wonderful it would be to live the rest of his years without worry over clan matters and listening to the shrieks and laughter of his grandchildren.

Chapter Four

Zarik thought dinner would never be over. It was bad enough that they had it so late, Niall liked to wait for the warriors to return from battle when they weren’t expected to be gone days or weeks. He’d have rather grabbed some dried meat and cheese and sat in his chamber.

Then he had to sit next to Tsarina. The entire meal. She smelled wonderful, like nothing he’d ever smelled before. Sweet yet perfumed and tart. Every now and again, her leg or arm would brush his. It was making him insane. It had clearly been too long since he’d been with a woman. He needed to remedy it. Soon.

His father wasn’t giving him leave either. Every time he tried to bid his goodnight, he was stopped. His father needed a hobby. Perhaps a woman of his own. After all, he wasn’t that old. And it had been a reasonable amount of time since his mother passed. It was time for Niall to move on. It would be expected.

“I think I’ll go upstairs now. Thank you for a wonderful meal.” Tsarina looked at Niall. While the food was different, it still tasted very well. It was spiced, though differently than she would have made it. The meat had been tender and juicy and she wasn’t really certain of some of the other things she ate. She felt it better not to ask for fear of what it might be. She definitely didn't want any faces or gasps of horror to make her seem ungrateful. People in this time had to work much harder to obtain their meals.

Zarik signed with relief. She’d be away from him and he’d be able to retire to his room to have a few drinks in front of his fire. Peacefully alone.

“I’ll escort ye, Tsarina.” Torradan told her as he pulled her chair back from the table. “We wouldn’t want ye slipping on the steps in the low torch light.”

“It’s not necessary, Tor. I’ll take her.” The words had passed through Zarik’s lips before he was aware. What the hell had made him say that? He’d been trying to get away from her all night, not take her to her bedroom. Damn his brother for always trying to be the more polite of the brothers. In most instances, it wouldn't have bothered him a bit. But there was something that was pulling him to be protective of the Fraser girl. It was likely because he'd been the first to see her.

As Zarik took Tsarina’s hand from Tor, he looked over to his father and saw him and Argus smiling at each other like children in a cookie jar. “Dinnae worry about coming back down, Zarik. Argus and I were going to retire as well.” Niall’s eyes glimmered.

“I’ll not be back down this eve. As soon as I get Tsarina to her room, I’ll be going to mine. It’s been a long day.”

He glanced at Tor as he realized he didn’t have a clue as to where her room was. The keep was large. He figured it might be on the third or fourth floor. He was on the fifth.

“Next to yours. The room right before.” Tor smiled and walked away.

“Lovely.” Zarik muttered under his breath. It was the room that would belong to his wife, if ever he were to marry. It seemed his father was trying to force him into running into battle without his shield.

“I don’t mean to keep you from anything. I can find my way back to my room easily enough.” Tsarina didn’t want him to think it bothered her that he seemed annoyed that she’d been placed next to his room. She hadn’t known it was his room next to hers. But didn’t think there was a need to be bothered by it. They were just rooms. He should have just allowed his brother to bring her up.

They didn’t speak as they went up the stairs. Zarik slowly lifted her hand and kissed it as he left her at her door. “Sleep well, Tsarina.”

It had taken every ounce of determination to not pull her hand from his lips. Where his lips touched her skin, it burned. A fire like she’d never felt. Especially from such a simple gesture. Did he feel it too? Judging from his lack of expression, she'd never be able to tell.

“Goodnight, Zarik.” She quickly went inside and latched her door.

****

              The next morning Niall and Argus were at the table waiting for breakfast as Tsarina came down the stairs looking as though she’d not slept a wink. Both men stood as she approached.

             
“Good morning, Tsarina. How are ye this morning? It looks as though ye’ve not rested well.” Niall inquired as she sat.

             
Tsarina ran her hands through her hair and smiled. “Good morning. I’m well. Perhaps just not used to the room.”

             
“Were you warm enough, my dear?” Argus inquired.

             
“Oh yes, Igrid kept my fire almost too warm. Does she really need to sleep on the floor in a corner? Why not let her sleep in her room? I’ve really no need of her, especially overnight.” She hoped that she sounded pleasant and not ungrateful. But the poor girl.

             
“She’s yer maid, Tsarina. In yer room and by yer side is where she need be. She knows this. It’s no discomfort to her to see to yers.” Argus gave Tsarina a sympathetic look as she glanced back at Igrid who stood behind her chair even now, getting ready to fill her glass.

             
“Of course.” Tsarina mumbled quietly. “So, what am I to do today?”

             
“Nothing much, Tsarina. Ye’re soon to be mistress of the keep. Izzy has been overseeing the keep for years, since the passing of my wife. I see no real reason for that to change. Wouldn’t it be nice to walk in the garden or stitch as you wish? There is shopping, of course. Ye do need some of yer own clothing. Ye may not enjoy simply wearing hand me downs.” Niall looked at the pale pink gown Tsarina wore. He remembered it on his wife and was pleased it was being used again. Tsarina was every bit as beautiful as Zarik’s mom had been. He just wished his son would offer all the new clothing and materials they had purchased for her. In the meantime, he saw no reason to not indulge her and let her shop.

             
“Oh, thank you for allowing me the use of your wife’s clothing. I appreciate it. I told Igrid I had several items of my own to wear, but she’d not allow it.”

             
“Yer clothes aren’t meant for here, my dear. I like seeing my wife’s clothing on ye. She’d be pleased that ye were to be her daughter.” Niall cast a genuine smile her way. “Ye should throw them away. The clothing ye brought with ye. I promise ye, ye won’t be needing them.”

             
“Perhaps Zarik could take her shopping tomorrow?” Argus looked innocently between Niall and Tsarina.

             
“That would be a splendid idea. I’ll speak to him this evening. He’s already long left for the training fields. I had thought with ye here, he might slow down on it some. But he was gone even earlier this morning. Grabbing some food in his hand and eating it on his way out the door. We’ll just have to get the two of ye together more.” Niall wanted them married already. Tsarina was lovely and perfect for his son. Someone he could be proud to have as his wife when he was Laird.

             
“I don’t want to become a burden he doesn’t want, my Lord.” Tsarina decided she needed to get these titles down before they thought her stupid. The looks she got from others in the house were bad enough. She didn’t need to add to it by being disrespectful.

             
“Now, none of that. I’m Niall and he’s Argus.” Niall pointed to the other man. “There’s no need for formality, unless ye’d like to call me Da. That would be acceptable.” His eyes twinkled. “I have no daughters of my own. Only sons. And none of my sons have married. It would be nice to have a daughter.”

             
Tsarina smiled nervously, unsure how to politely answer. So, she simply thanked them. Soon enough she was done eating and off to explore more of the keep. The library was magnificent and she ended up spending her day there. She was stunned when Igrid told her it was time to ready for dinner. She’d not even noticed she skipped lunch.

****

              Day turned into weeks and weeks into months. Tsarina fell into a routine. It became boring as the weather got worse. She was unable to really be outside. It was freezing. There was plenty of snow and the loch had frozen over. While a truly beautiful sight, it wasn't one she wanted to be out in.

             
Zarik continued to act as though she didn’t exist. He’d walk her to her room each night, simply to keep anyone else from doing it, kiss her hand and bid her sleep well.

             
Michealmas was upon them in no time at all and she looked forward to her first celebration. She knew it was different from her traditional Christmas and could barely wait. Niall and Argus were thrilled at her childlike enthusiasm and egged it on. She'd only read about it before. Now she was going to gain the opportunity to be involved in it. To see how it really was done. Would all the research books be correct? Even if they weren't, would she ever have the chance to set them straight?

             
Tsarina couldn’t believe she’d been in Scotland for almost a year. Samhain was again right around the corner and it would mark her one year anniversary in the past. She was surprised there wasn’t much she missed from her old life. Sure, a razor would be nice, not a knife used as one, a real razor with aloe on it for smooth skin. And going places in carts pulled by horses was rather bumpy as well. She still hadn't mastered how to ride a horse on her own. Those animals seemed to hate her.

             
“Tsarina?” A knock on the door and Niall’s voice came strong through it.

             
“I’m in here, open the door. It’s not locked.” Tsarina was learning to love her time with the man. She imagined he must have been wonderful to his wife. He was looking tired, though. Niall made her think of her father often. The memories were good for her. As was feeling as though she had a father again.

             
‘Tsarina, it’s long pass the time ye and Zarik should be together. We’ve been patient and tried to allow things to ease themselves to where they need to be. But, he’s not making any moves and he’s going to kill himself with all the hours of extra training just to avoid ye. It’s time for ye to make yer move, lass.” Niall sat in the chair he had pulled from the fire.

             
“I…me? What would I do? He’s made it clear he wants nothing to do with me. He avoids me. I can't force him to like me.” Tsarina wrung her hands in her skirts.

             
“Seduce him, lass. Ye ken how. I saw the clothing ye wore when ye arrived. I’ve sent a messenger to the mender and she’ll be here in a few hours to make a few nighttime items for ye.” Niall’s eyes twinkled mischievously. “Only night clothing and take her advice my dear. She’s been told to make ye the bridal bedding wear as well as something that may seduce my son to lose his wits and bed ye before marrying ye. Then his honor will demand he asks for yer hand.”

             
“You want me to trap him? And, the clothing I arrived wearing were not clothing of a whore. They are common for most every woman in my time.” Tsarina couldn’t believe her ears. She wasn't sure if she should feel insulted that he implied she was a whore or if she should worry more about him wanting her to trap his own son. A mother in her time might just scratch out someone's eyeballs for that. Besides, he'd hate her even more if he ever suspected she was tricking him.

             
“My apologies. I didnae mean to make it sound as though yer clothing made me doubt yer character. For Zarik, I’d not call it trap, but ye may use any words that ye prefer. So, yes. Trap. That’s exactly what ye must do. I want ye married in the next couple of months and with child long before the next Michealmas. I want to retire as Laird and I cannot pass it to Zarik until he is wed. Will ye do it for me, lass?”

             
Niall looked so hopeful. Tsarina really hated to disappoint him. “Your son is three times my size. I won’t be able to get him to do anything he doesn’t want to do. I’d love to help you, as it’s the reason I’m told I was sent here, but I’m afraid there’s nothing I can do but wait for him to want to speak to me. He’s no desire for marriage, children, or love. He's made it clear in his cold behavior. It hasn't wavered one bit over the months.”

             
“He just doesn’t ken he wants it. I guess we’ll have to come up with something else then. Keep yer appointment for yer fittings. You’ll still be in need of them. My wife said it was always nice to feel pretty and have something new.” Niall walked out and left Tsarina thinking of how different things might be if Zarik were capable of love.

             
“You could just send me home.” Tsarina knew he heard the words she had spoken, though he made no turn to acknowledge her.

****

              Tsarina dreaded her walk down the stairs for dinner. Each night she had to sit next to Zarik. They tried not to rub against one another, but it was near to impossible. Every time they touched, it was like tinder to an open flame. She wanted to explode. Was Tsarina the only one feeling this? Did their touch not ignite him as it did her? After almost a year, she was losing hope.

             
Perhaps it was because she was older than him. She was twenty-five and he was barely twenty. It wasn’t too common for the woman to be an old maid while the man was young.

             
Before desert came out, Niall cleared his throat and stood. The man was relatively silent at dinner, so this had to be important. Battles had been ceasing over the last six months, so Tsarina hoped that wasn’t about to change.