Karma (31 page)

Liza spread her hands in front of her. “It doesn’t matter. What he said? The way he said it? The fact that those things were bubbling below the surface? It all just proves that he can’t look at me and separate me from my brother. Or from his own past. I had no idea he was that deeply scarred by it.” She’d thought he’d pull away from her eventually. She’d never have believed he’d turn on her so cruelly.

Cara curled her legs beneath her. “You know Nash and Dare went to separate foster homes, right?”

“Dare said it worked out that way.”

Cara let out a harsh laugh. “Not really. Stuart Rossman’s parents took Nash. They offered to take Dare too, but he refused to go. He couldn’t live with them knowing he’d done nothing to save their son. The state could have forced the situation, but a lawyer, Richard Kane, knew the truth and stepped in. Nash went to the Garcias on the low-rent side of town. Nash lived in wealth. And nobody knew it was Dare’s choice until last year.”

Liza opened her mouth, then closed it again. “Oh my God.” Scarred didn’t begin to cover what that party had done to him. “He never told me.”

“He told Sam and me last year during a really low time.
I just want you to understand that what he said to you today? It wasn’t about
you
.” Cara shook her head for emphasis. “I’ve never seen him look at anyone the way he looks at you. Honestly.”

Liza didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. The man could very well love her and it wouldn’t matter. Because his past and her brother’s role in it stood between them. She was a reminder and that would never change. Dare might be sorry, but they’d find themselves in this position over and over again. So no, it didn’t matter what his rant was about.

They were finished.

She met Cara’s gaze. “Thank you for explaining. It can’t change anything, but maybe it’ll help me forgive what he said. How he said it. Who he said it in front of.” Her voice broke over the last word and she shook her head. “I’m a mess. I need to get some sleep.”

Cara yawned and covered her mouth with her hand. “Me too. But tomorrow we need to discuss the money, the meeting, and how you’re going to handle it.” She drew a deep breath. “And I need to tell Dare.”

Liza stiffened. “I have
you.
He doesn’t need to be part of this anymore.”

Cara eyed her like she was crazy. “Somehow I think he’d argue the point.” Bracing both hands on her chair, she pushed herself up. “I’m telling him. I have to.”

Liza inclined her head. “Fine. Tell him. Just make sure he stays far away from me from now on.”

Because her heart couldn’t take another beating.

At 6:00
A.M.
the next morning, Dare’s cell rang. He rolled over, feeling like he’d just gone to sleep, and grabbed the phone. “Better be good,” he muttered.

“It’s Cara.” She spoke softly.

Dare forced himself awake. “What’s wrong with Liza?”

“Oh, you care?” she asked sarcastically.

He didn’t need this now. “You know damn well I do or you wouldn’t be calling me at the crack of dawn.”

Cara sighed. “Fine. She had a visitor yesterday,” she said, still talking low.

Dare figured Liza was asleep. “Nash told me.” His gut cramped again at the reminder. “Is she okay?”

“She’s a strong woman. She didn’t even fall apart after you lit into her in front of your entire family,” Cara said, knowing she was torturing him. “Her visitor gave her a deadline. She has until five
P.M.
Monday to get them the fifty grand her brother owes them.”

“Fifty thousand dollars?” Dare shouted. He pulled
himself to a sitting position, ignoring the headache pounding at his temples.

“You got it. And, thank God, so does she. She said her grandfather left her money she’s put into savings.”

“When I get my hands on her brother…”

Cara snorted. “I’d say your attitude about her brother is what put you in the doghouse in the first place. But that’s not what’s important now. We need a plan.”

“I’ll come over and we’ll nail something down.” He swung his legs over the side of the bed.

“Not so fast, Romeo. She doesn’t want you anywhere near her.”

Dare shut his eyes against the pain that knowledge caused. “Thanks for breaking it to me gently.”

“Want some advice?” his friend asked.

“Would it matter if I said no?”

“Get your shit together before you lose her because you’re close. Now. About that plan?” Cara asked.

Dare glanced around his small apartment, small being an understatement. He hadn’t realized how spoiled he’d gotten staying at Liza’s. Not just the large rooms, which were nice, but the company.

Why had he thought he needed space away from her?

Because you hate her brother, he thought. But after his explosion last night, Dare had to wonder if the answer was all that simple.

“Dare? Plan?” Cara asked impatiently.

He shook his head, forcing himself to think. “Right. I need to locate Brian,” he said, not relishing the task.

“What good will that do? If he had the money, he wouldn’t be in hiding.”

Dare needed to find the man for more reasons than just the cash he owed. A confrontation between Dare and his nemesis was long overdue. Dare didn’t know if there was such a thing as closure, but he wasn’t finding peace by ignoring his past. Not that he’d share that with Cara.

“Take Liza to the bank to get the money on Monday,” Dare said, resigned. “Did they give her instructions?” Because like it or not, Dare wasn’t letting her meet with loan sharks without him by her side.

Personal problems be damned.

“He told her they’d be in touch. He also said they’re always close by.”

Dare slammed his hand uselessly against the mattress. “Don’t let her out of your sight.”

“Are you telling me how to do my job?”

He caught the teasing tone in her voice. Cara wasn’t happy with how he’d treated Liza, but she wasn’t abandoning him either.

“Yep. You got a problem with that?”

Cara laughed. “Nah. I’ll let you know if she hears from them. You spend the weekend doing some soul searching, you hear me?”

Dare groaned. “I’m on it.”

“Good. And kiss that sister of yours and tell her I’ll be watching out for her.”

Dare smiled. “Will do. Thanks, Cara. You’re a good friend.”

“I know. Don’t let me down, Dare Barron. Better yet, don’t let Liza down.” She’d lowered her voice again. “I’ll be in touch,” she said, and disconnected the call.

Dare didn’t know what he’d done to deserve friends and family like he had. He sure as hell hadn’t earned them.

But he intended to. He just couldn’t do it alone.

Tess came home from the hospital early the next morning. For Dare, visiting his sister was easy. Figuring out the rest of his life was hard.

Faith let him into the house and directed him upstairs to Tess’s room. Dare figured she’d had her share of talking and lectures, so he saved his for another time. Like Faith had
told him, she was embarrassed and upset but physically fine except for the hangover symptoms Alexa had warned about.

Dare reached the top of the stairs and paused outside her door, taking a breath before knocking.

“Come in.”

He opened the door and stepped into her room, a vibrant purple and black haven decorated by Faith. Tess sat up in bed and smiled shyly when she saw him.

“Hey,” he said, walking over. “You look a lot better today than last night.” She’d washed up and her face was clean of makeup and tears.

He winked at her and she scooted back so he could sit down on the end of the bed. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” She glanced down, staring at the mattress. “Ethan said you found me.”

“I did.” And that familiar anger swirled inside him once more.

But he refused to be drawn back to that dark, angry place today, reminding himself that Tess needed him to be strong. So had Liza and he’d failed her. He wasn’t about to repeat his mistake.

“Sam and I got the call. You scared the crap out of me,” he said honestly.

She met his gaze. “I didn’t do anything on purpose. I didn’t even get drunk. I barely took a sip of the beer and anything I drank before that was soda. Someone put something in my cup.”

“Which is why you never put your drink down, whether it’s soda or alcohol. And if you do, you get a fresh one yourself, and you make sure you see that it’s come from a closed bottle.”

She nodded.

“Lesson learned the hard way, huh?”

She nodded again. “Are you mad at me?” she asked in a small voice. “’Cause I’m sorry. I’ve been so good and now
this happened and I don’t want you guys to think I’m too much of a pain to have around anymore.” Her voice cracked.

Dare reminded himself that the drug was a depressant and she had to be feeling the aftereffects, but he hated to think she’d ever believe they’d abandon her. Nothing could be further from the truth.

“We happen to like pain-in-the-ass kids.” He held out his arms and to his surprise, his normally strong, smart-mouthed sister crawled right in and gave him a hug. “You’re stuck with us,” he told her. “You know that, right?”

She sniffed. “Yeah.”

“You mean it? Because if Ethan or Faith knew you were feeling this way—”

She shook her head and pushed back, already pulling herself together. “No, I know. I just feel so awful. Guilty, though I didn’t really do anything, sad, mortified…”

“You’re feeling the aftereffects of the drug. It can make you depressed and sad or like you want to cry. Hopefully it’ll be out of your system soon. Try and sleep as much as you can, okay?”

She nodded. “That’s what Faith and Kelly said.”

“They’re smart.”

“You’re not working today?” she asked.

“I’m off this weekend.”

Tess grinned. “Spending it with Liza?” she asked, teasing him, her eyes bright and alert again.

He groaned. “You are so nosy.”

“It’s one of my better qualities,” she said, and he was happy to hear her laugh. “Well? Are you?”

He shook his head. “We’re taking a break,” he heard himself say. Was he really confiding in a fifteen-year-old?

“Uh-oh. What dumb thing did you do?” Tess asked, arms folded over her chest.

He lifted his eyebrows. “What makes you think it’s because of me?”

“Duh? Because you’re a guy!”

“Smart mouth,” he muttered. “It shouldn’t last long.”

“I hope not,” Tess said over a yawn.

Obviously she was getting sleepy, which was good. She needed her rest. “Why? Do you like Liza?”

Tess studied him through perceptive blue eyes just like Nash’s. And their late father’s. “
You
like Liza, so yeah. I do too.”

Smart kid,
he thought, with relief. If she relied on that common sense and steered clear of trouble, she’d be okay. Good thing she had three older brothers and a sister and two sisters-in-law to make sure of it. Dare wanted to add one more female to the mix.

But he still had a long way to go.

“Get some sleep,” he told Tess. “I’ll come back to visit later.”

“Okay.” She snuggled back under the covers and he let himself out of her room.

He walked downstairs to find Ethan waiting. “Got a minute?” his brother asked.

Dare nodded and followed Ethan into his office.

“You okay?” Ethan asked.

“Yeah.” The word came out automatically, but the truth was more complicated. “Not really.”

“I didn’t think so.” Ethan lowered himself into a chair and motioned for Dare to sit too.

“A year ago we wouldn’t be sitting, about to have a serious talk,” Dare said.

Ethan shook his head. “A year ago Nash would have blamed me for what happened to Tess. He’d probably have hit me again too.” He rubbed his jaw, obviously remembering the brothers’ long-overdue confrontation. “But you always held back. You gave me a chance first.”

Dare nodded. He had.

“Maybe that was because you understood what it was like to make mistakes.”

Despite himself, Dare grinned. “When did you get so smart?”

“I had many years of beating myself up,” Ethan admitted, taking Dare by surprise.

He studied the brother he’d barely known and now felt a special kinship with. “How’d you get past it?” he asked.

Because like Dare, Ethan lived with regrets. He’d gotten arrested when he was almost eighteen and their parents were killed in a car accident on their way to bail him out of jail. Then, instead of sticking around for his brothers, he’d taken off for ten long years. So if anyone knew regret and mistakes, it was Ethan.

He leaned back in his seat, folded his arms over his chest, and met Dare’s gaze. “Not easily. The army helped. I did a little therapy with the shrinks there. I’m not sure if that helped or not. I do know the discipline and the regulation taught me what it meant to be a man and take responsibility.”

Dare got that. “Being a cop did the same for me.” He paused in thought. “But I realize now that was more of an external shift.”

“Because you still haven’t forgiven yourself. All the good deeds in the world won’t make up for what happened to Stuart Rossman. But the blame doesn’t lie solely on your shoulders either.”

Dare looked down, studying his hands, thinking about his brother’s words. No, he hadn’t forgiven himself. Instead, he’d indulged in enough self-hatred and flagellation for ten lifetimes, but nothing had changed. He was here. A young kid had died. Dare had done what he could with his life to atone while Brian McKnight wasted air and hurt everyone in spitting distance. Meanwhile, Dare nursed his anger and hatred toward the man, and when it exploded he’d hurt the one person in his life who truly mattered.

The hard truth remained. Nothing about the way he lived his life had or would change the past. It never would. But
one thing was certain. If he held on to that anger and hatred, the only thing it would accomplish was to ruin his future.

“I need to let the shit go somehow.” Dare ran a hand through his hair in frustration.

“Seems to me admitting it is taking the first step.”

Dare let out a laugh. “Yeah? What’s the second?”

Ethan shrugged. “You’ll figure it out.”

Yeah, he probably would. And Liza might forgive him. Whether she’d believe in him again, though? That remained to be seen.