Kate's Song (8 page)

Naomi leaned her elbow on her knee and pinned Kate with an accusatory stare. “It is high time you stopped all this nonsense.”

Edna sighed again, louder. “Naomi, please.”

“‘Resist the devil, and he will flee from you,’” Naomi said.

Edna nudged her sister with her elbow. “Do you remember how we talked about sticking our nose into other people’s business?”

Naomi snorted. “I’m simply saying what everybody is thinking.”

Edna prodded the horse to go faster. “Naomi, Kate is a good girl. Shame on you for prying. Let’s talk about something less distressing, like the dysentery epidemic in Africa.”

Stifling a smile, Kate tucked a loose lock of hair under her kapp. “Nae, Edna, it is all right. I know what people must be thinking about me. But that is why we have rumschpringe—so young people can decide for themselves.”

Naomi folded her arms and harrumphed. “It is shameful when children use the rumschpringe as an excuse for gross wickedness.”

Kate found the courage to put her arm around Naomi, who looked at her as if she were a creature from another planet. “My Amish faith and my desire to sing have struggled with each other for many years. I want to know God’s will for my life. If I want an answer, I have to do my part to get one. ‘Faith without works is dead.’”

Naomi shrugged Kate’s arm from her shoulders. “I can tell you right now: God wants you to be baptized.”

“How do you know?” Kate said.

“Because He wants everyone to be baptized.”

Edna clicked her tongue in indignation. “Naomi, do not presume to counsel the Almighty. You do not know.”

“Here is where God has placed her. She should not seek to leave her place.”

“Maybe the Almighty placed her here to struggle,” Edna said. “He gave her a beautiful voice, didn’t He?”

“But where does the wickedness end with that sort of life?” Naomi pressed a finger into Kate’s arm. “I will tell you. It ends in your destruction.”

The buggy jerked to a halt, and Edna breathed a sigh of relief. “To your house already, Naomi. Denki for coming with me.”

Kate practically leaped out of the buggy. Naomi scooted over and slid slowly to the ground, grunting and panting as she went. When she steadied herself on her own two feet, she shook her finger in Kate’s face. “Mark my words. The path you are on leads to nowhere but hell, young lady.”

“Good-bye, Naomi. I’ll be here at seven tomorrow morning,” Edna chirped.

Kate climbed back into the buggy and Edna snapped the reins before Kate could even plant herself firmly in the seat. As they drove away, they watched Naomi hobble to her front door in her orthopedic shoes.

“I hope you will forgive Naomi,” Edna said. “She tells it how she sees it, and sometimes she doesn’t wear her glasses.”

Kate managed a half smile. “You might not believe this, but all opinions are welcome. My dat would say that the ones that make me uncomfortable are the ones I should pay most attention to.”

“Most young people are not mature enough to see the truth in that.” Edna winked at Kate. “Naomi often has sensible opinions, but the way she delivers them chases away all but the most humble.”

The
clip-clop
of the horse’s hooves changed to a muffled crunching as they turned from the paved street to the gravel road that led to Edna’s house.

“What’s in the basket?” Edna asked.

“I brought you a loaf of bread and a jar of apple butter,” Kate said, lifting the cloth draped over her basket.

“Bread and a visit. This really is an honor.”

“I need some advice.”

“Ah, shall I take you back to Naomi’s? She hands out advice like trees hand out leaves in the fall.”

Kate grinned and shook her head. “Maybe some other time.”

“You come to counsel with Luke?”

“Nae, I want
your
advice.”

“Me? I am not qualified to give advice to anyone,” Edna said. “I am a simple Amish housewife who knows how to get my laundry clean, milk my cows, and cook a filling meal. Your mamma can do all of those things better than I.”

“But you left the community once. During rumschpringe.”

Edna nodded and pursed her lips. “I suppose I did.”

“And you are the bishop’s wife.”

“Ach, what do I know as the bishop’s wife? Luke does the ministering. I tend the house.” She waved her hand dismissively. “Besides, I am not
your
bishop’s wife.”

“Bishop Schwartz is my sister-in-law Ada’s father. It seems strange to go to him.”

“Perhaps.”

“I want to know why you left Apple Lake and why you came back. Or is it rude to ask something so personal?”

“Nae, but I do not talk about it much. It was such a long time ago. But Luke loves to tell the story.”

“He does?”

“Oh, jah, he puffs out his chest and struts around because I chose him over a very handsome Englischer.”

Kate pictured Luke Miller. A fine, gute man, but not handsome. His bushy eyebrows dominated his round face, and his cheeks were pockmarked with the scars of teenage acne.

“Todd Bryson was a sight. Curly golden hair and blue, blue eyes. I loved him—as much as an eighteen-year-old girl can know about love. He asked me to go to Chicago with him and a group of friends to live and find jobs.”

“And you went.”

“Your vision can cloud over when you are in love. I did not think of my family or my future. I wanted to be with him.” She pinned Kate with a stern eye. “But I want you to know, I did not do anything to shame myself. I lived with some of the other girls. And he in an apartment of boys.”

“How long were you there?”

“Not long. Luke came storming into town about three months later and gave me an ultimatum. ‘I will wait no longer for you, Edna Schrock. There’s three other girls back home if you’ll not have me.’”

“What did you say?”

“I yelled at him. He yelled at me. We made so much noise, the upstairs neighbors pounded on the ceiling. And then he kissed me right on the mouth and I thought I’d died and gone to heaven. I packed up my things and came home with him, and we haven’t ever once yelled at each other since we were married.”

“One kiss changed your mind?” Kate said.

“Nae, that was more like the icing on the cake. About two minutes after I got to Chicago, I realized what I had left behind. The exciting world outside of Apple Lake wasn’t all that exciting. It was loud and rude and frantic.” Edna regarded Kate with a perceptive eye. “You know what I am talking about.”

Kate nodded.

Edna patted Kate’s arm. “The Plain life is simple and slow, but it is not for everyone. The way we live requires great sacrifice. We sacrifice the self to find God. ‘He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal.’”

“It is so different from where I have been the last two years,” Kate said. “Selfishness there is encouraged. My professor scolded me once for letting someone else in line ahead of me during an audition.”

“Jah, I can imagine.”

“But the Amish way isn’t the only choice that requires sacrifice. I love to sing, but if I choose the academy, I will be separated from my family. It will never be what it was.”

“I do not know what to say to you, Kate, except that my family is the most important thing in the world to me. That is what I learned those few weeks in Chicago. I could never give up my family.” Edna studied Kate out of the corner of her eyes. “Then again, I cannot carry a tune in a bucket. So I never faced your dilemma.”

“Will I go to hell?” Kate said quietly. That seemed to be Naomi’s opinion.

“Oh, sis yusht! What an idea! If you choose to follow your music, then believe in God and live a good life. I cannot believe you will go to hell. But decide now how it will be. If you leave after you are baptized and have made your pledge to God, that is another story. But before? Of course not.”

Kate hadn’t realized how tense she was until she looked down at the balled-up fists in her lap. She relaxed her shoulders and took a deep breath. “That is what I wanted to know.”

Edna was thoughtful for a minute. “You say you need experiences.”

“Jah.”

“Then come with me tomorrow to the rehabilitation center. Naomi and I volunteer there once a week.”

“I don’t think Naomi will welcome my presence.”

“Ach, that girl has had a bee in her bonnet since nineteen-seventy-three. Don’t mind her.”

“Then I would love to come with you.”

“Gute. I will pick you up at seven-ten. And don’t be late. Tardiness puts Naomi in a bad mood. And you don’t want to see her in a bad mood.”

Kate laughed. Edna could summon mirth from a funeral gathering.

Dear Kate
,

So, an interesting Amish guy? Is he hot? I will miss you desperately if you decide to be baptized, but knowing your disposition, you would be very happy there
.

Jared’s condition deteriorated this week. I am so frightened and upset. They still won’t let me see him, and his mother is demanding more time with Alex. How can I keep Jared’s mother away from my baby? I have never had the forgiving heart you possess. I hate his whole family. But I think of you and try to be kind. It hasn’t worked so far, but I am trying
.

If you come back to school in September, you’re welcome to live with me. My brother says he will pick you up and bring you to Milwaukee anytime you want. I think he has a crush on you
.

Maria

Kate folded her letter and stuffed it into her apron pocket. But she brooded over its contents while she browsed the rows of quilts. She looked up as an Englisch couple in Bermuda shorts and sunglasses crossed the threshold of Martha Mullet’s quilt shop.

“Take a look, Vivian,” said the man as he removed his floppy hat. “If you can’t find a quilt in here, you are the most persnickety person in the world.”

Kate moved away from the new customers, losing herself deeper among the dozens of quilts hung in neat rows around the shop. There were a fair amount of quilt shops in Apple Lake—many Plain folk had stores attached to their homes or on their property—but none were as large or well-stocked as Martha’s. She carried quilts made by local Amish as well as inventory from as far away as Pennsylvania and Ontario. Her store sat in the heart of downtown Apple Lake—if four street corners could be classified as downtown—and attracted a plentiful tourist business.

“Can I help you find something, Kate?” Martha adjusted a lopsided quilt on the hanger and glanced at the customers who had just entered her shop. “Before the crowds get heavy?”

“Denki. Anna and I are making a baby quilt, and I am looking for ideas.”

Martha pointed to the back corner of the store. “Any of our designs would make a nice baby quilt, but our smaller ones are over there if you want to take a look. I got a new pattern from my cousin in Lancaster that is a variation of the log cabin. So cute. Let me know if you need anything—although the afternoon rush is about to start and you might not be able to find me before nightfall.”

Kate smiled. “I will manage.”

Martha bustled over to the awestruck customers standing in the center of the shop. “Can I help you find a quilt?”

Kate strolled up and down the rows of quilts, her eyes feasting on the vibrant colors. She marveled at the intricate appliqué designs, each so unique and so skillfully crafted. Appliqué was completely beyond Kate’s abilities. Just like she had told Sarah Schwartz—gute milking hands but unfit for quilting.

What
was
she good at? She liked to garden and can and even do laundry. But what was she good at?

The answer was obvious. She was good at singing. And in this community, they couldn’t care less. Sometimes she felt about as small as an ant on a watermelon.

Her mouth twitched upward at the sight of a bright pink and green watermelon appliqued on a nearby quilt. Not always that small. During her visit to the rehabilitation center with Edna and Naomi, she sang opera songs to several patients, Amish and others, and got nothing but sincere gratitude in return. One elderly woman told Kate her singing took the pain away and asked her to hurry back. Was this how she should be using her talents?

No matter what Aaron or Ada or anyone else believed about her motives, she yearned to know the mind of Heavenly Father concerning her life. When she peeled away the layers of her choices, His will lay at the heart of it all. She would do anything God asked of her. That intense yearning was the reason Nathaniel said she would surely get an answer. “‘If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not, and it shall be given him,’” he had repeated to her on more than one occasion.

Running her hand over a charming pink-and-purple quilt on one of the tables, Kate decided it would be the perfect pattern. Not too difficult but quite beautiful. She lifted it from the pile and found a place to sit on a small wooden chair tucked between two rows of plump quilts. The pattern was a series of butterflies cleverly sewn from a combination of squares and triangles. Kate smiled. She could stitch straight lines with proficiency. Matching corners was another story, but Anna could see to those details.

“Titus put my sewing machine into good shape again. Gute thing, because the girls need new school dresses for the fall.”

Two ladies—Kate couldn’t tell whom—wandered down the row behind her. She listened to their friendly chatter as she drew the butterfly pattern into her notebook. She didn’t really pay attention to what they said until she heard her name.

“Our church is at Weavers’, Lord willing. They have a nice big room for it.”

“Weavers’? Have you seen Kate Weaver since her return? They say she had a time of it in Milwaukee. Someone beat her up.”

Kate held her breath and clutched her hands together to keep from trembling.

“Oh, Lisa, she looked something terrible. And she is such a pretty girl too. Her dat was fit to be tied.”

“Seeing as how he probably bears the guilt of it. He should have put his foot down when she wanted to go off to that academy,” said Lisa. “My Adam never would have stood for it.”

“What choice did Solomon have? He could not very well lock her in the house if she set her heart on going. Oh, look at this one. A double wedding ring.”