Keeping Secrets in Seattle (4 page)

“You all right, tiger?” Faux-hawk Boy asked over the loud music.

“Tiger?”

He flicked at the fake ear that had found its way in front of my face again. “You’re dressed as a tiger. A mighty good-looking tiger, I might add.”

I grabbed the ear, my face heating. “Oh…right. Thanks.”

“Here, let me help you.” He led me away from the rowdy group we’d been standing next to, took the ear from my hand, and carefully reattached it to my hair.

“Thanks again.”

His brown eyes danced. “My pleasure.”

I cupped my hand over my ear. The music was throbbing. “What?”

“I said it’s my pleasure.”

Good Lord, he was attractive. Maybe it was because of his hairdo, or maybe it was because of his wide, unabashed grin. Or…maybe it was because when I looked at him, my gut did impromptu yoga positions. Either way, I liked it.

“Come on.” He took my hand. “I wanna dance before your boyfriend comes looking for you.”

I let him lead me onto the dance floor, yelling, “I don’t have a boyfriend.”

He glanced over his shoulder and grinned. His deep-brown eyes crinkled at the edges. “Good.”

We danced for a solid hour, our bodies close, moving to the bone-vibrating music. Every once in a while, he would lean into my ear and say something funny, making my pulse speed up. When I lifted my hair up to cool down, he blew on the back of my neck, and it sent a shiver of excitement down my spine. Occasionally, Kim and Betsy danced over and joined us, excited to see me out on the floor with a man, but I tried my hardest to ignore them as they gave me the “thumbs-up” sign and made kissy faces behind his back.

Once we were good and sweaty, he leaned in close. “Wanna get out of here?”

I looked at him, my eyes wide. I wasn’t ready to go home with the guy. Well, in theory. “I’m here with friends.”

He grinned. “No, not like that…I mean, do you want to step outside so we can talk?”

I sighed with relief. “Sure, okay.”

We walked off the dance floor, prompting Kim and Betsy to stop dancing and stare. When we got outside, the cool night air hit me and chilled my sweaty skin. He stopped a foot in front of me and held out his hand. “Landon Harlow.”

I shook his hand. “Hi, Landon, I’m Violet Murphy.”

“That’s a beautiful name.” Landon didn’t release my hand, and it was creating thrilling tingles up and down my arm.

I looked at him closely. There were wrinkles on either side of his eyes, which made me think he must smile a lot. I loved that. “So, what do you do?”

“I’m a carpenter. You?”

“Hair stylist.”

“That must be why your hair is so great.”

I bit my lip. Flattery would get this guy everywhere with me. “I like yours, too.”

“You’re here with friends, then?”

“Yeah. You?”

“My buddy is in there dressed as a devil.”

“A devil isn’t an animal.”

“He’s dressed as the Tasmanian devil.”

“Oh, I see.”

“It’s kind of lame.”

“No, it’s an animal. But it’s also a cartoon.”

“I consider the Tasmanian devil to be more cartoon than animal,” he said.

I laughed. “There are a lot of costumes in there that look a little cartoonish. I was sitting next to a girl who was supposed to be a goldfish.”

“Oh, yeah. I saw her.”

“You couldn’t miss her. She was wrapped in plastic.”

“Your costume looks great, too. You should have won the contest.”

“Thanks. My friend came in second place.”

Landon paused for a beat. “The bird?”

I nodded. “Peacock.”

“Right. She looked awesome.”

“So why aren’t you dressed up?”

Landon chuckled sheepishly. “I’m dressed as a guy visiting the zoo.”

I raised an eyebrow. “I must say, that’s not very creative.”

“I ran out of time. Worked late.”

“Too bad. You would have made a good-looking tiger with me.”

“Does that mean I would have had the hottest girl in the club as my date?”

I giggled, unsure what to say next. Part of me wanted to launch myself at Landon, wrap my legs around his waist, and ram my tongue down his throat. However, I knew that would come across a bit too strong. But I really liked him. I liked the way he made my body react, all fluttery and dizzy, and it was incredible to have forgotten about Gabe for an entire evening.

I was shocked by how badly I wanted Landon to pull me against his body and crush his mouth to mine, and that need created an odd sense of guilt inside of me. Guilt I didn’t want to give in to. Not again.

The silence stretched into a few moments, and we found ourselves staring at each other awkwardly.

“I really want to kiss you,” he said finally.

My lips started to tingle. “I want you to kiss me, too.”

“Well then, it looks like we’ve come to an agreement.” Landon’s voice had dropped an octave. He adjusted one of my tiger ears, then let his hand trail down the side of my face. His palm felt slightly rough. He was so strong and masculine, it made my stomach tighten.

My voice trembled. “You should hurry up and do it, then.”

“You got it.”

Landon’s face came toward mine slowly, his other hand cupping the other side of my neck, his thumb running along my jawline. When his lips touched mine, they were a thrilling mix of tender and anxious. I could feel his pulse through the thin fabric of his T-shirt when I brought my palms up to his chest. He tilted his head to the side, opening his lips tentatively and sending a rush of excitement down my spine. I’d missed this, the thrill of kissing someone new. Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pulled myself closer, deepening our contact and losing myself in the moment.

I’m not sure where along the way we started making out, but we sure did. Right there in the alley. And it was fabulous. We kissed, intermittent with short periods of conversation, until The Lotus closed at two
a.m.

Kim came stumbling around the corner of the building with a flood of people emerging into the night and a very inebriated Betsy hanging from her arm. “Violet! I thought you’d left. I was worried.”

I peeled my face away from Landon’s and grinned sheepishly. “Uh…sorry. Guess I found that distraction.”

Betsy raised her heavy head and gave me a lopsided thumbs-up. Kim observed her girlfriend and snickered. “I’ve got to get some food in her to absorb some of those drinks. She’s gonna wind up with the spins.” She eyeballed Landon, whose lower half of his face was smudged with some of my tiger makeup. “We’re going to Mildred’s Cafe for breakfast. Want to join us?”

Landon pulled apart from me. “I’m a distraction? From what?”

I stood on my tiptoes and pressed a peck to his lips. There was a soft tug in my chest, but I pushed the guilt that was creeping up on me to the back of my mind. “I, uh, had a good time. You know…kissing you.”

I could have sworn he blushed underneath the orange-and-black streak I’d left on his cheek. “Me, too.”

Landon’s fingers ran through his messed-up hair, and I noticed they were trembling. “So…want to do it again sometime? I mean, after dinner and a movie, preferably.”

I grinned. “Come to breakfast with us.”

The sparkle returned to his brown eyes. “Can we make out after breakfast?”

I pretended to think. “Possibly…”

Landon stepped closer to me, and he touched my waist. “I’m kidding. Sort of. I’d love to come to breakfast with you guys. We can take my bike and meet your friends there.” He gestured to a silver Harley Fat Boy parked a few yards down the sidewalk.

Oh, snap. This guy was making it very easy to push thoughts of Gabe to the back of my head. At least for the night.

Chapter Six

August 2, 2005

Gabe and I spoke for the first time since…that night. It was a relief and strangely awkward all at once. But when we talked, I decided not to tell him my secret. I locked what happened up in a vault and threw away the key.

“Oh, come on. Give me the remote.” I reached across the couch toward my boyfriend, who was dodging my grab.

My boyfriend.
I
had a boyfriend.

Well, technically, Landon and I had only been dating for two weeks, but during that time, we’d gone out to dinner three times, stayed in for movies twice, gone for a walk on Alki Beach, and made three dinners with Kim and Betsy. He called me on his lunch breaks just to say hi and even playfully referred to me as “his girl” a few days before while talking on the phone with his mother. His
mother
.

Instead of sitting around anticipating Gabe’s texts and calls, I was now anticipating Landon’s calls. He was sexy and funny, and when he kissed me, the hairs on my neck would stand at attention. But Gabe’s presence was always in the back of my mind, no matter where I went, or what I did. Our history was so tightly woven that it was almost like I was cheating on Gabe by falling for Landon.

I suppose that was why I was avoiding Gabe’s phone calls and texts. I didn’t want to be distracted. And let’s face it, Gabe distracted me.

“Hey, wait.” Landon grabbed me by the waist and pulled me close, right as my BlackBerry chimed. “I’m the guy. Aren’t I supposed to hog the remote?”

“Hmm, I never took you for the sexist pig type.” Snuggling underneath his arm, I noticed that there was a text message from Gabe on my phone.

Hey, you…why aren’t you answering my calls?

Landon kissed the top of my head. “That’s because it warrants such a good reaction from you, I think I might keep it up.”

I tried to squirm away from him, my finger poised on the keys. I’d spent so much time obsessively checking my messages, it was weird not to immediately reply to Gabe. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to talk to him, because I did. But Landon’s arms felt so good around my waist, and to lose myself in someone new was intoxicating. I pressed the Power button, the screen went black, and I tossed my BlackBerry aside before throwing myself in Landon’s direction again. “My apartment, my remote. Give it back.”

He held it above his head. “I’ll give you the remote…for a kiss.”

I gasped. “That’s extortion.”

He leaned in, his taunting mouth close to my lips. “It’s worth it.”

“Forget it, creep.” I jumped to my feet.

Landon’s eyes shone and he stood across from me. “I want a kiss.”

“Forget it. It’s almost ten. I’ve got to get to bed. You can just leave the remote on the couch.”

“You’re heading to bed? Sounds enticing.”

He made a leap for me, and I squealed and covered my mouth as I darted away from him. My roommates were already in bed, and I’d been asked a few times to pipe down.

“You’d better give me that kiss if you ever want to see your remote alive again.”

I shrieked when his hand grazed my side. Charging beyond Landon’s reach, I darted for my bedroom.

He caught me from behind, and without a second to prepare myself, he’d flopped me on top of my bed and landed on top of me. While I squirmed like a child, trying unsuccessfully to keep my laughter quiet, he plastered my neck with wet, noisy kisses.

“Keep the remote. I don’t want it anymore.” Instead of pushing him away, I curled my fingers through his hair and pulled him closer. “But I do want you to keep kissing me.”

He glanced up and his face became a hint more serious. He stood and straightened out his shirt. “And that,” he said carefully, “is my cue to go.”

“Excuse me?”

Bending at the waist, he pressed a kiss to my forehead. “In due time, beautiful.”

There were many things I was starting to really dig about Landon. One was the fact that he was adorably old-fashioned. He opened doors for me, he asked me what I wanted at a restaurant and then ordered it for me, and he was taking our physical relationship very slowly. Unlike our alcohol-fueled make-out session at The Lotus, each of our subsequent dates had ended with kisses that left my blood pumping when he turned to head home. This new desire to see how far he was going to let me take things every night made me crave him when he wasn’t around and anticipate our dates even more.

After walking Landon to my door and saying good-bye, I quietly danced back to my bedroom and quickly undressed, put in my earbuds, and turned on my iPod. Beaming up at the ceiling, it occurred to me that I was starting to get perma-grin whenever Landon left my apartment. What would my face do when he actually stayed the night?

There was a tap at my door, and I heard Kim’s sleep-filled voice in the hall. “She’s asleep. I don’t know if she wants to see you.”

Gabe’s deep voice rang out. “Hey, wake up.”

I sat bolt upright in my bed and popped my earbuds out.
Gabe
was here? Meaning, he was actually
in
my apartment?

“Hold on.” I scrambled to find some pants to put on, and settled for a pair of cutoff sweats.

“I hear congratulations are in order.” Kim’s voice was painfully polite on the other side of the door.

Gabe coughed. “Yes. Thanks…uh…nice shirt.”

I snickered. When she and Betsy called it a night, she’d been wearing her T-shirt that said, “I slept with your girlfriend.” I pictured the two of them standing opposite each other in the hallway, both of them staring at the floor or wall—anything but each other—waiting for me to open the door and break the tension.

“Good grief, open the door,” Gabe said after an awkward pause.

I slid an old rock band T-shirt over my head, then pulled my bedroom door open and came face-to-face with Gabe. He was poised to knock again, wearing an expensive-looking suit and button-down gray shirt that contrasted with his skin perfectly. His suit coat was darker on the shoulders from rain, and speckles of moisture dotted his skin.

His eager expression warmed me from head to toe, lighting me up on the inside like a Roman candle. “Vi.”

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

Kim spoke before he could say a word. “Glad you’re done having a wrestling match with your boyfriend now. I’d really like to get some sleep.”

My cheeks burned, and I glanced up at Gabe, whose eyes had widened. “Landon left. So, Gabe, what’s up? Where’s Alicia?”

“She’s at her place. She’s really tired. You know, from all the wedding planning.”

I nodded, even though I had no idea what he meant. Had I recently gotten engaged to him, I wouldn’t be
tired.
I would’ve been running through the streets and screaming it from the Space Needle.

Kim had a frown on her pixie-like face. “You sure she’s not knocked up?”

“Hush,” I hissed at her.

She grinned wickedly. “I heard pregnancy can really wipe a girl out. Especially when she only weighs seventy-five pounds.”

Gabe glared at her. “Well, it was nice to see you, too. But I’d like to visit with Violet now.”

Kim rolled her eyes. “Okay, lover boy, as you wish.”

I offered Gabe an apologetic shrug. “Sorry.”

I gestured into my room. “Come on in. It’ll be quieter if I can shut the door.” Gabe meandered toward my rumpled bed, and I gulped. “Unless you want to go somewhere else? We can sit in the living room or something? I mean, you know, since you’re engaged now and everything.”

Gabe’s face split into a grin, and he sat down on my bed, stretching across its width. “This is fine. So…why are you acting weird about this now?”

“Well, have you heard of calling first?” I sat down on the edge of the bed, the farthest away from him that I could manage. He smelled like a mixture of his Bvlgari cologne and rain.

“I did. And I texted you.” Gabe frowned disapprovingly. “I didn’t realize I would catch you in a postcoital glow. Who’s Landon?”

“He’s someone I’ve been…” I stopped speaking and gulped. Seriously, was it hot in my bedroom, or was it just me?

“Dating?” he finished for me.

I nodded dumbly. “Yeah. But, we weren’t…I didn’t…”

Gabe’s jaw twitched. “So you weren’t….”

“We weren’t having sex. We were just…chasing each other.”

One of his eyebrows went back up. “Chasing?”

I folded my arms across my chest. “Don’t give me that look, Mr. I-can’t-see-my-best-friend-anymore-because-I’m-freakin’-engaged.”

The corner of his mouth tugged upward. “Yeah, sorry. Alicia has had me busy every single night since Christmas.”

I frowned at him. “You’re helping with the wedding plans? That’s…weird.”

He tucked a pillow under his head. “Alicia thinks it will bring us closer together.”

“Oh, I see.” I couldn’t help but grimace. The girl was already marrying my best friend—now she needed to monopolize all of his time making pew bows and confetti packets? “Whatever. Let’s talk about the subject at hand, shall we? Why are you here? At ten o’clock at night? On a Tuesday?”

He watched me closely. “You don’t want to tell me about your new boyfriend?”

“What do you want to know?” I shifted in my spot. The idea of discussing other men with him made me want to crawl out of my own skin. Probably because in my heart, there’d only been him.

“Since when do we keep these things a secret?”

Anger flashed in my belly. “This from the guy who didn’t tell his best friend he was getting engaged?”

Gabe’s mouth formed a tight line. “Fine. Why haven’t you told me about him?”

I shrugged. “I guess I’ve been busy.”

“Too busy to tell me about your new…” He paused, a sad line forming across his brow. “Er, lover?”

I could tell he was trying to get a reaction. “Stop it. He’s not my lover.”

“So you guys are just friends?”

“No, we’re dating. We met a couple of weeks ago.”

“You guys sound pretty cozy.”

“Yeah, I guess we are pretty cozy.”

“Isn’t that kind of fast?”

I looked at Gabe in disbelief. “Didn’t you propose to Alicia after just five months?”

He held his palms up, laughing. “Okay, truce.”

“Come on. I want to talk about you.” I tried to frown at him and clenched my fists at my sides to keep from touching him. Maybe if I picked his brain for a while I could get to the bottom of this new Gabe Parker I barely recognized. “I want to talk about you and Alicia.”

He propped his head up on his hand. “All right, then. Shoot.”

I wished that being that close to Gabe didn’t still make my pulse race. “You know what I mean. You’re taking the vows. Where in the world did all of this come from?”

For a split second, I saw a flicker of panic cross his face, but it quickly melted back into joy. “Yeah, weird, huh? My mom said the same thing when I told her.”

There was something to be said for the little exchange between Nora and me after Gabe’s announcement at Christmas dinner. I wasn’t sure what to make of it, except now I was positive that she knew I loved Gabe. Did she wish he was with me? I shook my head, pushing the memory away. There was no point in focusing on my moment with Nora at dinner. Talk about a lost cause.

“It’s more than weird. It’s a major, major departure for you,” I said, watching Gabe’s face for some sign of remorse. Some flicker of light that indicated he still loved me. “What happened to the guy who said he wasn’t getting married until he was in his thirties? Or later?”

“I don’t know. I guess my opinion changed. I…” He paused. “I guess I fell in love.”

I swallowed
.
That stung a bit. “Well, then, if you don’t mind, can I ask you a question?”

He furrowed his brow. “When have you ever asked my permission?”

“Right.” I laid down on my side. “Okay. So…you’ve seen a lot of women.”

He closed his eyes. “Not that many.”

“Oh, please, Casanova. You’ve had more girlfriends than Hef.” I socked him in the shoulder.

“So what’s your point?”

“My point is…what makes Alicia so different? What makes you want to make her your wife?”

Gabe stretched out, his fingers laced behind his head while he stared up at the ceiling. “Alicia’s amazing. I wish you could know her the way I know her.”

I made a gagging sound.

“Shut up. She’s kind and smart. She volunteers at a soup kitchen, did you know that? And she’s got me doing things to help out the community, too.”

I pressed my lips together tightly. Gabe was a kind person, but serving the community? He usually wrote his yearly check to the Red Cross, then called it good.

“She encourages me to do things I’ve never done before. She wants us to host charity events someday. She wants us to be known for our philanthropy when we’re older.” His eyes danced as he rattled on, and a twinge of jealousy stung in my gut. “Alicia motivates me. She makes me want to be a better person. She inspires me to work harder.”

Personally, I found it hard to believe he
could
work harder. Gabe busted his ass at his career in advertising and was the youngest junior partner in the history of his agency. I tried to read the expression on his stoic profile. “And you’re happy, right?”

He turned toward me. A hand emerged from under his head, coming to rest on the side of my face. “Yes.”

We just stared at each other, the only sound Betsy’s muffled snoring next door. His hand was still cool from being outside, but my skin heated beneath it, and I was frozen in place, with my mind going like a runaway city bus.

Why did Gabe touch my face? What was I supposed to do? Was I supposed to kiss him now? No, no, no…I’d just kissed my boyfriend good-bye, and Gabe was
engaged
. He was taken. Off-limits. We both were.

I sensed every curve and angle of his fingers and relished in the way they felt against my skin. It’d been a seriously long time since he’d touched me like this. His face was an odd mixture of emotions as we sat there. Excitement and joy mixed with panic. A departure from his usual state of complete confidence.

“Why are you here tonight?” I asked.

He blinked and dropped his hand from my face. “I came to ask you a question.”