King Sized Beds and Happy Trails (Beds Series) (11 page)

And there in his classic button up is my rabbit. Ryan’s eyes are clear of sleepiness, his lips no longer pushed out at me and the bed head is tamed.

It wasn’t the bed head.

It was him.

Everything about him.

What if being with him doesn’t mean losing him? I don’t have to run away to find my happy ending because I found it when I was ten. The minute we confided in each other was the minute he became the only person I ever trusted. The only person who knew every single thing about me.

I take a deep breath and reach for my ring to give me strength.

My ring!

It’s gone.

“Ugh.”

“Hey, if it bugs you, don’t look.” Kaylee hops off Nate, but keeps a hand tight in his back pocket. Usually it
is
their PDA that makes me groan, but right now, it’s Sean waving Lex over to sit next to him.

“I don’t thi
nk I want to deal with this right now.”

Nate nods, ‘
cause he gets it, but Kaylee’s eyebrows crinkle. I shake my head, rubbing a hand across the back of my neck, grab a muffin and my coat, and get the hell out of there.

I’m messed up. There’s no other w
ay to describe it. I’m a moron who’s in love with his best friend and can’t tell her about it. For some reason I thought things were going into “more than” territory. Everything she was saying last night, the way she was saying it, the way she touched me. Even this morning when she was so nervous and was babbling a storm about her damn nails, I thought it was about me.

How cocky is that?

It was all about Sean. Because Operation Dickhead worked. And it worked so fast, I didn’t have the chance to tell her how I feel about it. How I
really
feel about it.

I jam my hands into my coat pockets, forgetting I was holding a muffin, and it smashes
between my fingers. Yeah, I don’t care.

The snow crunches underneath my feet, echoing across the empty resort. It’ll always be the same between us. That’s what I needed to happen though, right? I didn’t want to screw up our friendship
which is why I’ve kept my mouth shut. Now we can go back to normal.

Even though I don’t want normal.

I want different.

More.

I stop dead in the snow. This is why I’m such an idiot. I should just tell her. Everything. How for the past year I’ve wanted to take this a step forward. To tell her I love her. And she’s worth loving. She should know that.

The snow is still crunching in my ears, even though I haven’t moved a muscle.
Things are panging in my chest, and I’m starting to sweat even though it’s freezing. How do you tell your best friend you love them?

The crunching gets louder. And faster. I crank my head over my shoulder to look behind me.

Lex.

She followed me out in the cold this time. I give her a half smile for a split second, then I see it.
Her face is so torn apart, worry lines going across her forehead and when we lock eyes, she picks up her speed walk to a full out run, slamming into me.

What did that pansy do now?

“What happened?”

She ran out
without a coat again. Crazy girl. I push her off for a second to unzip mine, then let her tuck inside.

I’d say it now. Right here in the snow sharing the same coat together, but I don’t know what ha
ppened yet. What I’m feeling doesn’t matter anyway. Not when she’s feeling this way.

“Come on, Lex.” I kiss the top of her forehead
as her breathing warms up my chest. “Do I need to beat the pulp out of someone?”

She shakes her head and squeezes me tight. “It’s… it’s gone.”

Huh?

“What’s gone?”

She pulls back, her eyes starting to water. It’s amazing how much she’s cried on this trip, but on the opposite side of things, I haven’t seen her as happy as she’s been either. Maybe she is having a hormonal week.

“My ring. I-I can’t find it.”

My eyes shoot to her hand. She twists her fingers around an empty pinky.

“When did you last remember having it on?” I should know, since I notice every time she twists the thing, but I don’t remember
her doing it once since she told me about her nightmares.

“Monday night.” She shrugs. “I-I guess I
didn’t need to look at it between then and… now.”

Her eyes flick to mine and stay there.
She stops twisting the imaginary ring, dropping her hands to her sides. Instead of crying, like I expect her to, her eyes light up. Her mouth twitches in the corners, and I hear a loud gulp from her throat. It’s an expression I’ve only seen a few times with her. Usually it’s so easy with us. The words just come out. But sometimes, like now, she struggles to say what’s on her mind.

Because I’m a bit of a fool, I wipe a fake snowflake from her cheek. I just need to touch her, maybe make her feel more, too.

“Ry, I—”

“There you are.” Of course,
the douchebag has to interrupt. “You forgot your coat.” Sean holds out Lex’s jacket, which is actually Kaylee’s, and if he took a second to know Lexie for real instead of just checking out her ass, he’d know it wasn’t hers.

“Thanks.” She takes it, going pink in the cheeks and not looking at me anymore.

He gives me a look that says, “Dude, get out of here,” but I stay put. This isn’t some bend over and take it situation anymore. Lex came after
me
because she needs
me.
So he can leave.

She stands awkwardly between us, still keeping her eyes from mine
.

“So, Lexie,” he says
, rubbing a finger over her hand. Heat jabs through my neck, and my hands turn to fists. “Our group has the rec room in a couple hours. Feel like playing air hockey? You said that was your favorite, right?”

Either she lied to him about that, or he’s mixing her up with a different girl. Because Lex’s favorite table game is ping pong. I can’t help the guffaw that comes out my mouth, but they both ignore me.

“Uh, sure.” She gives him a smile, but not like the one she gives to me. Maybe I’m misreading what makes her happiest. “I just need to look for something first. Meet you there at ten?”

No fluttery eyes. No seductive voice. Nothing that makes me gag like it has been the past two days. Maybe there is something different.

Ah, man. I better knock it off. She’s pissed about her ring. I’m trying to find something more that just isn’t there with her. At least on her side.

“Perfect.” His prick of a
grin pulls up as he leans in and kisses the exact spot I kissed her three minutes ago. Like he has a sudden right to do that. “I’ll save a table.”

She watches him walk away, back to the lodge lobby. Man, this is why I left the dining room in the first place. I didn’t want to see this. I’m a selfish ass who doesn’t want to see her with a
nyone else.

I turn around and keep walking to the cabin, letting my eyes search the ground.

“Where are you going?” Lex catches up with me, looping her arm through mine. Like always. And like always, I flex. Because that’s part of our friendship.

I wish that didn’t leave a bad taste in my mouth. I should be happy Lex is my friend.

“I’m looking for that ring, you goof.” Shaking my head, I try to build up some laughter. “Maybe it fell off when you were trying to sneak out of bed this morning.”

“Crap, you saw that?”

I chuckle, flexing more under her grasp. “I heard it.” I nod toward her leg. “How’s your knee?”

She punches me in the shoulder and
lets go of my arm. “Race you.” And she’s off. At least this time I’m not carrying a million pounds.

I should let her win. She did lose her ring and all, but
nah. This is keeping her mind off it, and it’s not like me to, well, not win.

Passing her, I turn around and run backwards, waving at her. Instead of picking up the pace
to get ahead, she leaps on me. We fall onto the puffy ground, her legs straddling my hips as she—without remorse—shoves a handful of snow down my pants. Then bolts the rest of the way to the cabin, laughing her head off.

That dirty little cheater. She’s so going to get it. If my balls don’t freeze off
before I get to her.

Catching up, I grab her around the waist and trap her against me. The fistful of snow in my hand goes up her back, and only part of me realizes I’ve entered into dangerous territory. Skin on skin, and noticing she’s not wearing a bra—if my junk hadn’t just had a cold bath, well…

But she’s laughing and smacking me, jumping up and down. I don’t care about pushing it. She could be curled up in a ball of grumps and depression, because I
know
how much that ring means to her, but she’s not. She’s having fun.

With me.

“I give! I give!”

I laugh as I drop the snow, but for some dumb reason, I keep my hand on the small of her back.
We’re calming our breathing, both smiling at each other, and my chest is going crazy. Sparking and doing that shit that always happens when she’s around.

Her hand moves to the one I’ve got on her back. She curls her fingers between mine and pulls it out of he
r shirt. Uh, yeah, that was probably awkward for her. Whoops.

“Um…” Pink fills her cheeks. “I think it may have fallen off in the shower.”

I nod, scratching the back of my neck before I think to stop it. She half smiles at my ticker. “All right. You look there. I’ll tackle the bed.”

***

Nothing. Not in the shower. Not under the bed. Not
in
the bed. Or in the sheets or under the pillow. Not in any drawers or cracks or up anyone’s nose. The ring vanished. Or it’s somewhere outside.

And the more we search, my mind goes to those slopes, and by the look on Lex’s face, she’s thinking the same thing.

“Grrr!” Lex throws her empty duffel bag across the room, missing my head by inches. “I’m never going to find this damn thing!”

“Calm down.” I chuckle
and hand her suitcase back to her. “We haven’t looked everywhere.”

“Those slopes are huge, Ry. We’re never going to find it out there.”

She’s probably right about that. Still, I try to reassure her. “We only went on the one hill. And when our group goes out this afternoon, I’ll help you look.”

She plops down on the bed, arms covering her face
, and mumbles into her hands. “What if we don’t find it?”

“We will.”

She shakes her head, bringing her hands down. Tears are crawling across her face. “Yeah, right.”

“I promise, Lex.” I sit on the bed next to her. “I’ll find it before Saturday, okay?”

She nods, but I can tell she doesn’t believe me. Glancing at the clock on the nightstand, I let out a big breath. “It’s 9:55.”

“Okay.” She doesn’t move. “Will you come with me?”

My eyebrow pulls up and I’m ready to shoot off a “hell, no” because I don’t want another slope incident, but her face looks so torn I can’t.

“Yeah, but I’m not hanging out with you guys.”

The walk there is the quietest me and her have ever been with each other. She doesn’t even tuck her arm around mine. Just plays with the empty space on her pinky. I don’t know what to say to make her feel better. And I’m not going to wrestle around with her before she goes on a “date” with Sean.

The rec room
is huge. No wonder this trip was a pay-out-your-ass thing, because between the cabins, the rec room, and the skiing time, the school had to have shuffled out some serious cash. Lex tosses her coat to me, and I hang it up, right next to a whole bunch of those quarter machines parents waste their change on so their kids’ll shut up on the ride home or whatever.

Before I know what I’m doing, I whip out a quarter and spin it in the one closest to the pool tables. Lex cocks her hea
d as I pop open the tiny holder I won.

“Here,” I say, sliding the twenty-five cent orange colored—well, ass turd brown colored—ring on her pinky. “I know it’s not the same, but at least your finger won’t feel naked.”

I expect the punch in the shoulder, but instead I get a hug around my middle. Girl is surprising me about a million times during this trip.

“Uh, Lexie?”

Sean eyes us… well, me. He cracks his knuckles like that’s supposed to intimidate me, and I almost laugh. But Lex dives out from my hold making laughing impossible.

“I’ll catch you later, okay?” She smiles at me. Just one dimple this time.
I nod, and watch the prick walk away with my best friend.

Again.

Sean wraps his arm around my shoulders
, his embrace nowhere near as warm as Ryan’s, and I look back at my best friend and smile. Only he knows what that ring means to me. And to think, I was going to throw our friendship away because I, out of nowhere, can’t control my urges when I see those sexy eyes.

Losing my ring sucks big time
, but it also stopped me from making the biggest mistake of my life. I’ve never been a strong believer in “things happen for a reason,” because why would I be stuck with a drunk for a mom and a dad who abandoned me? But maybe in some weird and twisted way they do.

You can’t always go with what feels right, sometimes you have to go with what’s practical. And even though Ryan and I feel so right
, it’s not practical. You don’t kiss your best friend and you definitely do
not
date him.

It’s an invisible line, but it’s a thick line. Crossing it would be like crossing the Mojave with no water
. It will drain us of all that’s good until we’re nothing more than dried out replicas of what we used to be.

I refuse to let that happen. Sean is gorgeous in his
All-American boy way. He’s funny and up until last week I was in love with him, but most importantly—he’s practical. If I lose Sean, I know I can survive. I’d never survive without Ryan. So I rest my head against Sean’s chest, and we walk away. And I don’t look back.

Sean guides me to a big
, red plush couch in the corner by the pool tables. Kevin, Mike, Jill and Kiki—yes that’s her real name—sit on the couch opposite of us.

These are the same people
who whispered to each other when Sandy verbally attacked me at Skippy Lee’s.

Silence stretches out across the two couches while
the girls do everything to avoid eye contact.

Awkward.

I look down at my nails,
Pink Before You Leap
. I thought it was fitting when I was in Kaylee’s room debating if I should tell her about Ryan. Funny how it was the color she had on the nightstand.

Sean slides his arm around my shoulder and pulls me close. I should be shooting rainbows of happiness out of my ears right now, but all I can think about is Ryan and what
he’s doing.

My hand goes
to my ring, only to stop because it’s gone. Lost. Possibly never to be found again. I bite the inside of my cheek to keep the realization from making its way to my tear ducts. Then I find the ring Ryan gave me and the hole begins to close.

“We’re goin
g to go back up to the mountain,” Sean says, completely oblivious to the fact that my cheek is now bleeding at my desperate attempt to hide the emptiness I feel inside. Ryan would have noticed the way my face is clenched. How my cheek puckers when I bite it.

I swallow the taste of blood and force a smile. “That sounds like fun.”

“You kicked ass yesterday. Ready to do it again?” His arm tightens around my shoulder, and he pulls me closer in an awkward hug. My shoulders bunch up, and if he doesn’t release his grip my heads going to pop off like a zit.

“Yeah you were like really good.” And she speaks. I thought Kiki lost the ability
since she hasn’t uttered a single word to me since sixth grade.

I’m sure it was beginner
’s luck, and I’ll just wind up face down in the snow like Ryan, but my ring might be up there.

“I’m in.”

***

The whole time on the ski lift Sean tries to kiss me. He lingers uncomfortably close
, and there are only so many times a girl can pretend to sneeze. And come on! Does he really think I’m just going to kiss him at the first opportunity? He just ended his thing with Sandy like what? Yesterday? Her saliva is probably still mixed with his. If I kiss him, I may as well walk right up to Sandy and smack my lips against hers.

Not to mention it’s so cold I can feel my snot freezing. If he kisses me
, our lips might freeze together.

We get off the ski lift, my eyes immediately going to the ground to look for my ring. Sean utters something, but my mind is on a one
-way track, and Sean is not that track.

His hand wraps around my arm
, and he tries to pull me in another direction. “We’re going to try out the other trail.”

My stomach drops, heart races
, and I’m on the verge of an all out panic attack. I’m up here, and now he wants me to go in the opposite direction of where my ring can be.

“I like this trail.” I flutter my eye
lashes, playing up the cuteness. “We can always come back up to the other path.”

“Let me go talk to everyone else,” he says and gives me a knowing wink like my eye flutter was an invitation for sex.

No time to think about that. I have to look for my ring. My eyes dart to the ground, and I slowly glide backwards, scanning back and forth to make sure I don’t miss a single inch of snow.

Snow. A fresh coat fell last night. My ring is as good as gone. My tear ducts are frozen
—thank God—because if they weren’t I’d have waterfalls. I take another glide, the back of my skis hit a solid mass, and I go down, arms flailing.

I land with a thump.
My breath sucks right out of me, and I take a second to breathe again. The mass moves until it hovers above me. “Lex, you okay?” Ryan asks with a laugh.

“W
hat are you doing up here?”

He takes my monkey mitten in his gloved hand and pulls me to my feet.

Rubbing the back of his neck, his eyes scan the ground around us. Sexy brown irises look up at me, cheeks stained pink from the cold wind. “I was looking for your ring.”

Words are lost somewhere in my throat. I can’t get out a single noise.
There’s only one way down the mountain, and the last time he attempted it, he wound up bloody and hurt.

Instead
of words, I jump up and wrap my arms around his neck. Through the layers of clothes, his body heat wraps around me like a comfort blanket and he squeezes just right. The soothing scent of juniper passes through my senses, and my body relaxes into his.

“Uh,
I didn’t find it,” he says, and warm tingles travel up my neck from where his breath hits me.

I could stay like this forever. Pressed against him, snow falling around us
, but I want to see his eyes. I pull away and glance up. “But you’re looking,” I say and bite my lip when long lashes blink down at me.

“Of course I am.” His eyes darken, but not like they do when he’s angry. This is different. I’ve seen it once before. It’s the same tint as when I almost kissed him.

Lips part, and screw the thick line. I want this. More than I have ever wanted anything in my life.

I
move closer, pulled by those magnetic eyes when I’m twisted away. Skis hit skis, and I almost fall, but Sean’s steady arm holds me in place.

“Talked everyone into it.
This trail it is,” Sean says and kisses me on my cheek. “You ready?”

How could I forget I was up here with Sean and his friends? It’s just every time I see Ryan
, everything around us disappears, and it’s just me and him.

It’s dangerous being this close to Ryan. My mind turns to runny nail polish
, and all rational thought is thrown down the bunny hill.

I look back at Ryan
, and he nods toward the trail. He wants me to go with Sean. My eyebrows pull together ready to shake my head and demand he comes with us when he says, “I’ll be right behind you. See you down there.”

“Come on.” Sean grabs my hand and
tugs me away. Lucky for my kickass balance skills or I’d be flat on my butt with my skis in the air. Sean doesn’t look back at me. His shoulders are stiff and he seems pissed about something. I don’t ask. I don’t really care.

We position ourselves at the top and then push off. Wind hits me hard ag
ainst the face. Sean glides past me, body poised as if he’s on the Olympic team.

I don’t have the concentration to perfect my stance right now. My mind
’s still up on the mountain top.

Kiki passes me and then Jill, but I keep a steady pace and let my eyes travel the slope. Even if I d
o see my ring, I have no idea how to stop.

It doesn’t matter. I don’t have to. No shining piece of silver flashes at me b
efore I make it to the bottom.

Darn it.

White teeth flash at me instead. Sean struts over, head held so high, you’d think he’d have a medal hanging from his neck. “Did you see that, babe?”

When did he think it was okay to start calling me babe?

“I saw you go by me.” My eyes drift to the slope, looking for Ryan.

“Yeah I was hauling ass.” He high fives Kevin and Mike
and puts his arm around my shoulder to guide me away from the group. “Lexie, I’ve wanted to ask you something.” He releases my shoulders and stands in front of me. A ball of clothes and skis tumble down the mountain. A ski flies in the air and then the ball smacks right into Sean. He drops to the ground as the ball comes to a stop and straightens out.

“What the…
?” Sean yells out as he stands and wipes the snow from his pants.

“Sorry about that, dude.” Ryan says, completely covered in snow from head to toe.

A giggle slips through my lips and when Ryan turns with raised eyebrows I lose it. Fits of laughter erupt and with all my energy in my laugh I fall to the snow beneath me.

“Damn it,” Sean yells, as he wipes his lip and blood smears across his finger. A drop falls to his white coat. “That’s going to stain!” He storms off
, and I laugh harder.

I hold my stomach to suppress the laughter pains and
crawl over to Ryan. “Are you…” Laughs interrupt me. “Okay?”

“I’m glad my near death experience amuses you.” I try to hold the laughter in but the buildup becomes too much
, and it blows out with a loud snort. Ryan shakes his head, snow falling from his knit cap.

He reaches up
, his long gloved fingers push a piece of hair splattered across my face and tucks it behind my ear. At his touch the laughter stops. My eyes focus on the strong lines of his jaw, the straight bridge of his nose and then linger on his full bottom lip.

“You ready to head back?
I’m freezing my balls off here,” he says and takes his hand away from my ear. I want to reach up and put it back. Feel his warmth spread through me.

I’m sick of
not crossing the line. What Ryan and I have is nothing short of amazing, but maybe it could be more. Signs or no signs I’m sick of over analyzing every little detail. It’s time to just let things happen naturally. No running and hiding and no forcing things forward. Just wait and see what happens.

“I have the perfect solution for freezing balls,” I say and then bite my lip when I realize how dirty that sounds.

Head tilted, eyebrow raised he smiles. “Oh yeah? And what’s that?”

“Hot tub.”