Kiss Me Gone (9 page)

"I won't ask you anything until you tell me you're ready," I promised. "Just let me hold you and take care of you like I should have all those years ago."

I waited, not even breathing until I felt the faint nod she gave in answer. Rolling to my side, I cinched her close to me, made sure she had enough blanket tucked around her to keep warm and then I held her until we both fell asleep in an uneasy truce.

Eden

On the pullout with Dare, I slept through until the sun was up, its light penetrating the living room from the curtains in the kitchen. Rolling from my left side to my right, I opened my eyes to find Dare sleeping on his back. His chest rose and fell with the same regularity of a second hand moving around a clock face with three counts up and three counts down, over and over.

His peaceful state seemed unjustified to me. I had a dozen or more thoughts running through my head upon waking, each one a fat anaconda coiling around all the others while he blithely slept on. I hadn't come into the living room the night before with the desire to fuck Dare. A panic attack interrupting my sleep, I had wanted peace from the fear and nothing else. When I recognized the desire brought on by his body heat, the subtle fragrances of his skin and the way his arm wrapped around my body like he'd been holding me like that forever, I fought to control it.

I was bleeding on the inside after his rejection. Part of me was furious, as well, anger bubbling inside because he expected me to believe that he really did want me but was being all noble and shit. And his reminding me of the McPhersons' assault was rubbing alcohol poured on an old, but always open, wound.

Ready to roll quietly onto my feet and grab my backpack, I lifted my head and softly braced one palm on the pullout's thin mattress.

"Good morning," Dare said.

My head swiveled in his direction. I could see the question hiding in his gaze -- hell, his whole damn face. Was I staying? Had I already decided to leave? How long before I left?

I didn't have an answer. Or I had too many answers because he was asking the wrong question. Did I want to leave? No, but I knew I couldn't stay. My faith in humanity, or maybe in myself, had been cracked all over, a million fragile lines covering my exterior shell. One more tap was all it would take and everything I was or could possibly be again would shatter. I had to go.

Did I think I would survive leaving? Probably not. Maybe if I had made it in that hotel until mid-spring, I could have headed south, sleeping outside, panhandling or finding odd jobs to keep my belly full. But it was a dangerous plan for anyone and practically suicide for a woman. Maybe if I got beat up just enough, but not too much, I could find a bed and a new start in a woman's shelter.

So very tired of dwelling in the dark thoughts that grew with Dare's attention locked on my face, I sat all the way up and swung my legs off the side of the mattress. One of his big hands captured my wrist and the other curled around my opposite hip.

"We're still on for driving lessons today, right?"

My throat dry, I swallowed. I wanted to wiggle free from his touch, but I remained passively motionless. His grip tightened and then I felt his cheek pressed flat against my spine. He was hugging me, sort of. Hugging me and sighing once before he spoke again.

"We'll have breakfast first," he decided. Sitting up, he scooped my hair from one shoulder so that all of its length curled around my neck on the other side. His lips pressed against the bare skin just below the spot where my jaw met the bottom of my ear. He kissed me again at the lower curve of my neck.

Keeping one hand on me, he scooted so that his back was against the couch cushions. Then he captured both of my hips and pulled me to him, his arms wrapping around me and his lips brushing against my ear. "Or maybe just relax a little more right here while we finish waking up."

I remained a malleable lump even after his thumb began to stroke along the side of my breast.

"Baby, I'm sorry about how I handled last night."

His deep voice and all the heat emanating from his skin made me sleepy. Fingers and thumbs began to manipulate my flesh and the next kiss he gave me ended with a sucking bite along my throat. One hand moved up to pull at my hair, forcing me to extend my neck. The other hand tugged at a nipple and I groaned.

"You know I can't stay--" My voice broke at the idea of leaving Dare.

"You can try," he countered.

The hand at my breast slid down to cup my mound and squeeze. Just that one squeeze had me ready to explode. He began to knead mound and thighs, his lips chewing random spots along my jaw, neck and shoulder. His fingers dipped beneath the dainty elastic band of my panties to find the line between my labia.

"Try, baby," he repeated and then his fingers slid into me, my pussy wet and throbbing, its need in charge of my lower body so that my ass squirmed and pumped.

I exhaled, the breath heavy with moisture and a prelude to my panting cry for a deeper penetration. Turning in his arms, I climbed onto his lap, my knees pressing against his sides. He still had one hand tangled in my hair and he kept my head pulled back, my face pointed at the ceiling.

My fingers worked the space between us, inexperienced but intuitively focused on freeing Dare's cock from the boxers he wore.

"Not yet, Eden," he gently warned.

Damn, was he going to get all paternal again, tell me I wasn't ready? Did he have any idea how much I needed him in me, connecting with me if only for the moment and my choice freely made? Couldn't he guess that I had only taken one lover and not quite willingly?

Homeless, just released from a thirty-day sentence and headed straight back to jail if I didn't come up with somewhere to live, circumstance had provided the coercion. I learned all too quickly that I would have been better off in lock-up instead of finding a man who would let me pay my way with my pussy.

The memory turned me instantly dry. I reached up, guided Dare's hand so that he released his grip on my hair then slid off his lap. He didn't let me go far. He curled his arm around my stomach and held me with only a little force. His lips pressed a hard kiss against my cheek, his voice thick when he finally said something.

"I can't be in you bare when you could be gone tomorrow, pregnant..."

I nodded my understanding. He was right. The last thing I wanted to deal with was a pregnancy. Avoiding his gaze, I untangled from him with a question.

"Where should we go for the driving lessons?"

Dare sighed, the sound frustrated but accepting. "I thought we could go to the middle school. They expanded the lot and have let the high school set up cones for its driver's education class."

"They won't mind?" I risked a glance over my shoulder to find his eyes cast down, his hands absently fussing with the hem on his boxers. His chin lifted and I turned away before he could catch me looking.

"No." A second of silence was followed by him chuckling. "But maybe put your hair up in a ponytail. Without any make-up, you can probably pass for one of the driver's ed students."

I cast a second look in his direction, holding his gaze just long enough to scrunch my nose at him and stick out my tongue.

"Especially if you do that," he said, a grin beginning to erupt on his handsome face as I disappeared down the hallway.

********************

Out in the cold sunshine with Dare convincingly playing the congenial driving instructor, the lesson went by all too fast in some ways and far too slow in others. Every inadvertent contact between our bodies made my skin tingle. Then I would remember his rejection the night before and the odd morning scene, in which he seemed to want me but rejected me again, and the tingling instantly turned to an itch to slam on the brakes and walk away from Dare and Hagersburg for good. With my mood swinging hard in every direction but center, it was a miracle I didn't wreck the truck.

Throughout the lesson and on the drive back to his house, Dare didn't mention doing any shopping for bedroom furniture or our attending the party in honor of the injured firefighter's release from the hospital. But I couldn't miss the furtive glances at the dashboard clock or the way he restlessly moved around his own home upon our return. Even when he finally managed to sit still, his lips moved against one another every few minutes as if he had something to say.

As the starting time for the party approached, I realized he wouldn't go without me. He still thought I would sneak away the minute he turned his back. But I knew from all the years that I spent with Michael, the way the firefighters honored and celebrated one another, that Dare was duty bound to go.

Hell, I had the same obligation. Bailey was on the team that rescued me. It didn't matter that he had been unconscious. He had risked his life going into that building.

Stepping to the living room window, I pulled back the curtain just enough to look at the sky above. Michael was somewhere up there, watching me. He wouldn't judge -- he never had -- but I could feel his building sadness in the way the clouds gathered and darkened.

Looking over my shoulder, I caught Dare staring in my direction. His jaw tightened when he noticed me staring back.

"Will this be okay for the party?" I picked at the cuff of my sleeve. "I rinsed the red blouse last night. I can change into that if this isn't--"

He shook his head. "You look perfect, but you don't have to go."

Copying the gesture, I took my first step toward where he sat on the couch. "Michael would want me to."

His mouth twisted. Reaching forward, he wrapped a hand around each of my hips and guided me onto his lap. It was the most intimate we had been since I crawled off the pullout that morning. I curled into him and hid my face against his neck.

"He was a good man," Dare said, his strong arms curling around my shoulders. "He would understand if we stayed here."

I pressed closer to Dare, my palm flat against his chest. I scratched lightly at the fabric of his shirt as if I could trace the words that I was thinking. It wasn't Michael's potential disappointment that worried me at that moment. I didn't want to let Dare down or create a rift between him and his friends. I also didn't want to alienate them in case I decided to stick around a little longer.

"I want to go with you," I whispered. "I want to meet the men who help keep you safe."

His throat bobbed with a rough swallow and he hugged me more tightly to him.

"Baby, I want to kiss you."

Every ounce of me yearned toward him, but I pulled back. Straining upward, I planted the barest kiss center of his forehead then stood. As I moved, my hands trailed along his arms to finally grasp his fingers.

"I want you to kiss me, too." My fingers tightened around his and I almost returned to his lap. "But we'd likely get distracted."

His eyebrows bobbed in agreement and, to my relief, a faint smile edged the corners of his mouth. I let go of his hands and he pushed up from the couch. He brushed the back of one knuckle against my sleeve then pinched the fabric.

"You'll like Bailey. Cam, well..."

A slight grunt and a reddening of Dare's cheeks told me all I needed to know about the other man.

"Occasionally, I need to put him in a headlock," Dare finished, his biceps flexing in a promise to subdue Cam if necessary.

"But he's your friend." I looped my arm through his and turned us toward the kitchen where our coats hung next to the door leading into the garage. "He can't be that bad."

"He just needs to find the right girl. One whose existence will convince him to finally grow up."

Helping me into my coat, Dare fixed me with an odd look before his gaze dropped to focus on the bottom of my jacket where the zipper refused to yield to his attempts at threading the two ends together.

"Here," I said, lightly brushing his hands away. "It's not made for a man's thicker fingers."

My words stirred a memory from earlier that day and how very thick his fingers had felt inside me. Rubber replaced the muscle and cartilage of my knees and it took all my effort to remain standing. With a knowing chuckle, Dare grabbed the ends away from me and made quick work of the zipper. Lifting the pull toward the collar, his gaze followed its progress until our gazes met. He pinched my chin, a smile flashing across his face.

"Are you sure we need to delay that kiss?" His low voice nudged at my thighs.

I gulped in air and nodded. If he kissed me, we would soon find our way into his bedroom, the box of condoms spilled across the bed, one wrapper opened, its contents snugly holding his cock. I sucked in another breath and shoved his coat at him.

"We really need to go -- now," I said, foolishly believing that meeting Dare's friends was safer than an evening alone with him.

Eden

Cam Stevens rented a house a few blocks from Dare. A red Jeep filled the narrow driveway, so we parked on the street.

"Looks like the guest of honor was the first to arrive," Dare joked, opening his door.

I reached for the release on my seatbelt, but he covered my hand. I waited for him to get out, come around to my side and open the door before I pressed the button and slid the belt off my shoulder. Unaccustomed to such courtesies, I couldn't quite meet his gaze as I took his hand and let him help me from the truck.

"Whenever you want to leave," he started, repeating the same assurance he had offered me getting into the vehicle.

"I'm sure everything will be fine," I said. Like Dare, both Bailey and Cam were older than me. I expected their dates would be, too. So there was little chance I would know anyone.

The front door opened as we stepped onto the porch. A man with dark blond hair and glittering brown eyes lifted his chin in greeting. His mouth danced in what looked like suppressed amusement, but he said nothing.

Loose knots began to form in my stomach. A little less than two days had passed since the fire. I didn't know what was being said around the fire house, but I recalled how Dare had told the man with the clipboard after the fire that I was Michael Burke's daughter. He had said it like the name should mean something to the guy. So it wasn't hard to imagine that the man had spread the information around. Had the mention of my dead stepfather stirred old gossip about Helen and Frank?

I hoped not.

With his hand lightly positioned against the small of my back, Dare guided me into the house. I busied myself with the zipper of my coat, my gaze fixed on the task to avoid the smile on Cam's face that was quickly turning into a smirk.

"Drinks are in the kitchen," Cam said, turning away from us. "I need to finish dumping shit onto the snack tray."

A woman's laugh caught my attention just as Dare put his hands on my shoulders. I looked up, the coat sliding off my arms with Dare's help. A few feet away from us, a slender woman was curled up next to a man on Cam's couch, her back to me and all her attention focused on her companion. They both had red hair, his dark and cropped close to his head. The woman wore her hair long, its familiar red-orange shade making the knots already formed in my stomach tighten and coil together even though I hadn't seen her face yet.

A glance at her reflection in the darkened television screen confirmed my growing suspicion that I knew Bailey's date.

"I thought he dumped her months ago," Dare whispered against my ear. He was hanging my coat on a hook by the door, but his arms froze as he recognized Anna McPherson, my former classmate.

Recovering, he finished storing the jacket then cupped my elbow with one hand. "They must have gotten back together after he was injured."

I dipped my head, my gaze on the floor as I hoped for a few more seconds of anonymity. "Yeah, well...almost dying can make a person do stupid things."

Feeling Dare's grip on me tense, I cursed my big mouth. He probably thought I was talking as much about what had passed between us over the last two days as I was about Anna and Bailey.

"I didn't mean--"

"Sure," he said, cutting me off. "Do you want to leave?"

I shook my head, the gesture dishonest. I wanted out of there so fast I would have strapped a rocket launcher on my ass, but I refused to give Anna McPherson the satisfaction of seeing me tuck tail and run.

Cam returned from the kitchen carrying a heavy tray. He dropped it on the coffee table with a loud thud that made Anna jump. She laughed a second later.

"Feeling lonely, Cam? Do you need us to pay more attention to you?"

His brows lifted and then his head bobbed in our direction. "You two lovebirds are so wrapped up in one another, you missed our new arrivals."

I took a step backwards as both Anna and Bailey swung their heads in the direction of the front door. Her smile, already dipped in plastic, froze as she took in my face and recognized me.

"Eden Burke?"

"You know each other?" Bailey asked, his voice sounding pleased and inviting. Clearly he had missed the tone in her question and the building horror in my face.

"I went to North," I answered as Anna continued to stare at me.

"Same year?" Bailey wondered, still not catching a clue.

When neither of us answered, he gave Anna's arm a little jostle and repeated his question. "Babe, same year?"

"Yeah," she said, her voice almost detached from her body. "I can't believe you're back in town, Eden."

Shocked at the reproach in her tone, I turned toward Dare. I was more than ready to leave. I opened my mouth to tell him just that when I heard voices on the porch. A second later, the front door swung inward. The inside knob collided with Dare's hip. He stepped to the side, exposing another couple.

My brain slowly processed their identities. A woman with curly blond hair, vapid blue eyes and a slack mouth, entered with a man following close behind, his hands on her hips and his face obscured except for a lecherous grin as he looked down at the woman's ass.

"Hustle that pussy inside before I freeze my balls off, babe."

I didn't need to see his face or hear his voice. The ginger hair and dumb blond giggling at his crude words told me it was Tom McPherson, Anna's cousin. Worse than that, the blond was Molly Quade.

Clearly, the universe had an agenda to ruin my life, but first it wanted to degrade me more than it already had.

I looked at Dare, wondering what part he had to play in my little tragedy. Was he another villain or just a hapless subject like me?

Tension pulled at the corners of his eyes and mouth. He hadn't removed his jacket yet. He reached for where my coat hung next to the door. Molly rubbed against him as she tried to make her way further into the house. Her gaze landed on me at last, her slack face suddenly sharpening with a less-than-complete sense of recognition.

A sharp-tipped finger, its nail coated in red polish, extended in my direction. "Hey, don't I know you?"

"It's Eden Burke," Anna volunteered. "She's the one Dare rescued from that hotel fire in Pole Town."

A sneer spread across Molly's face. Over her shoulder, I saw Tom's head whip in my direction, his smile predatory.

"Pole Town?" Molly's voice sounded sweet and innocent, but I knew it was a ruse.

I braced in anticipation of what she would say next.

"Isn't that where all the whores and druggies live? Like, no one decent lives anywhere near there."

God, the girl was every bit as psycho as the last time I saw her!

"I sure hope so," Tom laughed. He tried to step around Molly, but she collared him with one hand. She reached for Dare with the other, her red-tipped fingers closing around his wrist as he started to hand me my coat. "I thought you were having lunch with Laurie tomorrow? She said you texted her today and scheduled it."

My gaze jumped to his face. Red flashed across his cheeks. I couldn't tell if it was guilt about this Laurie person or anger at the way Molly clawed at him.

"I asked if she had a few minutes to see me," he admitted. He looked at me, his expression suddenly veiled. Twisting his hand free, he handed me my coat and curled his arm around my shoulder.

"Maybe it's the concussion," Bailey interrupted from the couch. "But I feel like I'm missing something."

Cam snorted once, his face sobering instantly as Dare's gaze cut in his direction.

Turning his hard stare toward Tom so that the man moved, Dare tugged me to the door as he answered Bailey. "Well catch up at the station."

"We'll catch him up tonight," Molly cooed, her eyes on me and just as stabby as they had been that night in Anna's car.

I froze, my limbs paralyzed. I didn't know if it was anger or the fear a mouse felt encountering a cobra. My body felt both, the tension from the opposing emotions ripping at my flesh. Feeling me stop as he tried to lead me out of the house, Dare lifted me over the threshold and pulled the door hard behind him.

The windows rattled from the force, the vibrations rippling through me. Numb, I let him place the coat around my shoulders, but I couldn't get my legs to cooperate.

"Do you really want them to see me carry you to the truck?" he asked, his voice gentle but edged with anger.

"It doesn't matter, I won't be seeing them again." My words issued as hollow as I felt. My anger and fear had yielded to a familiar hopelessness.

"I don't like the sound of that, Eden." Dare braced one arm against my back and then placed a palm flat against my stomach so that he could propel me forward to the truck without lifting me or knocking me over. Taking me around to the driver's side, where none of his friends could see me if they were looking out the window, he lifted me into the cab then pushed me across the bench seat.

Finished securing me in place with the seatbelt, he curled a hand along my chin and forced me to look at him. "You're going to stay in Hagersburg and let me help you. You may occasionally run into them."

I pulled back, breaking contact. "You've been friends with them all along..."

With the accusation hanging in the air, Dare turned and jammed his key in the ignition. He threw the truck into drive and pulled slowly away from the curb. His grip tightened against the steering wheel, flexing every few seconds until he spoke at last.

"Bailey is my friend," he answered with a tight throat. "He has shitty taste in girlfriends. Tom and Molly aren't around unless Anna is. Tom works EMT, so I can't completely ignore him and Cam occasionally invites him regardless so he can torture the dumb prick."

He huffed, seemingly impatient that I wasn't racing ahead to connect the dots and tell him I was wrong, that I forgave him any contact he had to suffer with that deranged crew of my old classmates.

"You were gone, Eden, and I didn't know where--"

"You would have," I interrupted softly. "If you had answered my emails."

He stopped arguing with me after I shot that little barb at him. With only a few blocks between his house and Cam's, we were already home. But "home" was the wrong word for it -- at least it was for me. I had only spent two nights at Dare's and I didn't expect to spend more than one last night with him.

If I still had an invitation to do so.