Kiss of Fire (St. James Family) (24 page)

“
Nat. Whose apartment is this?” Toni said, in complete disbelief. It was better than she imagined.

“
Come look at the kitchen.” Nat took her arm and lead her into the remodeled space. Marble countertops and gray cabinets greeted her, along with top of the line appliances. “See? A dishwasher, because I know you hate washing dishes.” Toni nodded dumbly, still in shock. “I went a little crazy in here, even though you don't cook. I couldn't resist,” Nat said. “And see, the dining room is connected.”

“
It's amazing. Huge. So beautiful,” Toni said, looking around the kitchen.

“
Two bedrooms, two baths. Wait til you see the shower in the master bath.”

“
Oh my God. You didn't.” Toni said.

“
You're going to love it.”

“
But wait,” Toni held up a hand. “I want to know why.”

“
Why what?”

“
I want to know why. Why are you giving me an apartment?” She looked from her sister's face to Christophe's. They glanced at each other and then back at her.

“
Well your birthday's coming up. And you got a promotion.”

“
My birthday is in two months,” Toni said. “And the promotion is not that big of a deal.” She could tell there was something else that they weren't saying.

“
Just tell her, Annie,” Christophe said. Nat fiddled with her diamond earring.

“
Tell me what?”

“
Well, we like having you close, and you can't keep staying overnight at our place.”

“
If you don't want me to stay over, just kick me out, Natty! You don't have to give me an apartment!”

“
You can't stay overnight at our place because you won't have a room anymore,” Nat said carefully, linking her fingers with Christophe's.

“
Why won't I have a room anymore?” Toni asked, looking from Nat to Christophe. Both of them were grinning like dummies and her heart jumped in her throat.

“
Tell her,” Christophe said.

“
Because your old room is going to be the nursery.”

“
What?!” Toni yelled.

“
I knocked your sister up,” Christophe said proudly. Nat jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow.

“
Oh my God!” Toni rushed into them and threw her arms around them. “Are you serious?!”

“
Yes, very serious,” Nat said.

“
How long have you known? I can't believe you've been keeping secrets from me!”

“
I'm three months along.”

“
Boy or girl?”

“
We don't know yet,” Christophe said.

“
We don't want to know,” Nat said, laughing. “We're taking it day by day. I'm getting a little older and...”

“
The doctor says everything looks good. Annie is being paranoid,” Christophe said.

“
We're not telling anyone yet, because it's so early. Well, except for you.”

“
I'm so happy for you guys,” Toni said, planting a kiss on her sister's cheek. “Really. But I don't know if I take this apartment. It's too much.”

“
It's too late. Your name is on the deed,” Christophe said. “It's all you.”

“
Christy finally sold his loft and we just figured maybe it would be time to buy some more real estate,” Nat said with a shrug. “Luckily, you get to benefit. And this is the last gift we're giving you for awhile so you better enjoy it.”

“
You guys.” Toni looked around, seeing the apartment with new eyes. The kitchen was brand new and gorgeous. She peeked into the living room, which had a bay window. She put her hands on her chest, feeling her heart running a mile a minute. “You guys!”

“
Come on. Let me show you the shower. You're going to love it,” Nat said, and Toni followed her into the bedroom, giggling giddily. Nat took her room by room, showing her the rest of the apartment, and Toni couldn't believe that it was all hers. She kept looking around at the blank white walls, imagining living there. It was all so crazy. It was all so...
hers.

When Nat and Christophe were ready to go, she stayed behind alone, wanting to take it all in. She sat down in the middle of the living room in a huff, shaking her head. It was all so unbelievable. She'd need so much furniture. And what a kitchen! For someone who didn't cook, it was a little ridiculous. Maybe with access to a kitchen like that, she'd finally have to learn. She laughed to herself, sliding her phone out of her back pocket, knowing there was only one person who would fully appreciate the irony.

***

O'Donovan shouldn't have come. He knew he shouldn't have, but he couldn't stop himself.  But he told himself he needed to see it, with his own eyes. He needed to see the final nail in the coffin of his and Toni's relationship.

“Come in.” She smiled bright and tugged on his arm, pulling him into the dark foyer. The apartment  went on and on, and he wondered how big it was. “Come look at the kitchen,” she said, and he followed her into the brightly-lit, renovated kitchen with expensive appliances. It was just as empty as the rest of the apartment, and brand new. “What do you think? Could you make me breakfast in a kitchen like this?”

“
Toni—”

“
I think this is a perfect kitchen for you to make me breakfast. And lunch. And dinner.” She giggled at his expression, which he was pretty sure was close to a scowl, then pulled a bag out of the fridge. “But for now—takeout.”

“
You actually got food and had it waiting for me?” O'Donovan said, now fully suspicious.

“
I knew you'd be hungry,” she said, glancing back at him innocently. “It's crazy right?” she said, unpacking the bag. “This apartment is way beyond what I ever would have thought it would be. Two bedrooms, two baths. A classic six, Christophe called it.” O'Donovan took a deep breath, trying to tamp down on the anger in his chest. He'd spent the last few weeks trying to distance himself from Toni St. James and her life, and yet here she was, smacking him in the face with it again. He turned and walked into the living room, needing a minute.

The nagging pain he'd been feeling in his chest since the night of the ballet was suddenly searing, and he knew he couldn't deny it any longer. Things with Toni were wrong. She was wrong for him and they weren't going to work. Period. And it made him fucking angry. But what else could he do? He'd known all along it was going to end, and it had gotten completely impossible to pretend that they had any reason to be together. She was so far out of his world, she might as well be on another planet.

“Come look at the shower,” Toni said, her voice breaking through his thoughts. “It's got the massage thing we like.”

“
I don't want to,” he said gruffly.

“
What's wrong?” she asked. He shook his head, gritting his teeth. He was such an idiot for thinking... what had he thought? He knew from the beginning they would never work out. Before he'd ever touched her, he knew. And yet here he was. Running to Manhattan the minute she called, his blood pumping fast and his dick hard because he was excited to see her. Craving her body wrapped around his, craving her laugh, craving it all. Holy Mary. He was so fucked.

“
Toni,” he growled. “This is so fucked up.”

“
What?”

“
How the fuck are they just going to give you a million dollar apartment? You don't have a problem with that?”

“
It was a gift,” she said, furrowing her brow. “I mean, what was I supposed to say?”

“
What fucking planet am I on right now? This shit is bizarre,” he said, shaking his head.

“
You're pissed at me,” she said. “Why?”

“
Because this is bullshit! Christophe Van der Kind paying for that kitchen, that shower, this whole fucking place. Another man putting you up, and you don't have a problem with it?”

“
It doesn't have anything to do with Christophe!” she yelled.

“
Don't.”

“
Don't what?!” she screamed. “They're having a baby! They want me close because we're
family!
”

“
It's not because they're family. It's because they're fucking rich. That's why they spoil the shit out of you. And you're stupid enough to take it, instead of working for shit on your own.” He watched her shut down, completely close herself off at his words. It was the desired effect, but it still hurt like hell to know he was the one hurting her.

“
Fuck you,” she said. “You self-righteous asshole!”

“
Bury your head in the sand, Toni. Pretend that this shit isn't fucking weird. Or are you so far beyond the real world now that you don't get that?”

“
I can't believe you're saying this to me.”

“
I knew you were a spoiled brat from the minute I fucking laid eyes on you. And I just kept trying to pretend that it didn't matter. But it matters, Toni. It fucking matters!”

“
It's none of your business anyway! What right do you have to judge me?”

“
Why did you invite me over here tonight? To fucking rub my face in this shit?”

“
I invited you because I'm in love with you and I missed you and I wanted to share it with you!” she screamed and all the air seemed to evaporate from the room. Her eyes widened, like she hadn't meant to say it, but it was too late to take the words back. She was in love with him. The reality of her words hit him in the guts like a fist, and possessiveness reared up in him. She was his. Toni St. James was his. But he couldn't have her. He couldn't fucking do it to her, or to himself. They were crashing and burning, right then and there.

“
Fuck this,” he said, trying to catch his breath. He passed her on his way toward the door, but didn't dare look at her. It would be too hard to look away.

“
Don't leave,” she said, her voice clipped like she couldn't breath either. “O'Donovan!” He didn't stop, just kept going and didn't look back. But she wasn't going to let him go that easily, and he should have known she wouldn't. She slipped around him, slamming her back against the front door. “You don't get to leave like this,” she said, eyes pleading.

“
Get out of my way,” he said, leaning close to her.

“
Do you love me?” she asked, lifting her chin defiantly, despite the tears that glistened in her eyes. He slammed his palm into the door above her head, the rage welling up needing an outlet. She jumped, but didn't drop her gaze. “If you love me, don't go.”

“
Move, Toni,” he said through gritted teeth.

“
I've never felt this way about anyone,” she said softly.

“
Was it that good, huh?” he bumped his hips against hers and she gasped. “I fucked you, and now you think you're in love?” Her nostrils flared and he knew he was working her up. “Guess what? We're not good for each other.”

“
You're the only one who gets to decide if we're good for each other?” she asked, angry now, too. Good.

“
I've already decided,” he said, yanking on the doorknob. The door swung open, but Toni shoved her foot against the wall and pushed, slamming it closed again.

“
What are your reasons, huh? I want to know why I'm not good enough for the high and mighty Sebastian O'Donovan.”

“
You're
too good for
me
. That's the problem. Well, it will be a problem. Just wait. When you can't have all the stupid shit you want because I don't make enough money. When I can't take you to all the fancy places you want.”

“
I don't care about that stuff! Besides, I have my own money, you know. I don't need a man to do those things for me.”

“
Christophe Van der Kind seems pretty keen to do all that shit for you. And you aren't in any hurry to stop that gravy train, are you?” Her mouth dropped open and he knew he'd gone too far. She shoved at him, pushing him against the wall.

“
Get the hell out!” she hissed then strolled down the hallway, not giving him another look. He wrenched open the door, and stood at the threshold for a minute. The thought of leaving her, after all the awful shit he'd said, seemed unbearable. Part of him wanted to go and drop to his knees and beg for forgiveness. But he knew he couldn't. He had to go. So he forced his legs to move and he left.

He was halfway to the elevator when she yanked open the door and ran out into the hallway, her chest heaving like she was about to hyperventilate.

“Don't go,” she said. “Don't you dare go!”

“
Fuck,” he sighed, knowing that he had to go, but not wanting to. The anger still simmered under his skin—at Van der Kind and at the situation that the rich asshole had forced on them. Toni wasn't to blame, after all. How could she say no to such a lavish gift? She looked so scared at him leaving, but he realized that her fear was leaching out and snaking into him. He would be okay after Toni, he told himself. It might be terrifying now for her, but she would be okay, too. She was young. She had a lot more time to find the one that was right for her.