Authors: Morgana Phoenix,Airicka Phoenix
“I didn’t.” He lowered himself back down on the stool and clasped his hands on the table in front of him like he was about to start prayer. “That’s one thing I can promise you.”
Julie shook her head, more to clear it than in denial. “Shaun said you ... Shaun?”
It was as though someone had smacked her upside the head with a two by four. The crack of it echoed through the chambers of her brain until her eyeballs rattled. But she kept them focused. Kept them trained on him.
Mason dropped his gaze to his fingers. The gesture said everything.
“But why?”
He shook his head slowly. “It doesn’t matter—”
“No, it does matter!” She yanked open a drawer and grabbed all the spoons from their slot. “That’s what this is all about. What does he have against me? Why would he do something so ... horrible?”
Mason made a sound between a sigh and a groan. He mashed the heel of his hands into the back of his eyelids and rubbed.
“Because of me.” He dropped his hands and raised his head. “Because he knew I liked you and he thought it was funny.”
“Why would that be funny?”
Mason hesitated. “Because he knew I would never do anything about it. At least, not at the time. He thought it was funny that of all the girls that wanted me, I was fighting like hell to keep away from the one I wanted back. Inviting you to that party was his way of dangling the carrot, so to speak. He wanted to see me fail.”
Shaken, Julie could only stare at him as his every word slammed into her, syllable by syllable, like tiny metal fists. So much of what he was saying were things she had longed to hear from him for so long that it hurt. The rest only made her furious.
“Julie,” he murmured when she could only shake her head.
“He’s an asshole!” Her voice trembled.
A grimace of pain crossed Mason’s face. “Shaun’s not the easiest guy to understand, but he means well ... most of the time.”
Julie almost laughed. “Means well? He humiliated me because he thought it would be funny.”
“That’s not...” He broke off with an exasperated sigh. “It was me he was trying to prove a point to.”
“But you’re not the one who got hurt, Mason. He never even apologized.”
He shifted in his seat and leaned closer. “I’m not going to make excuses for him. We’ve been friends since diapers, so I know he’s a royal douche. What I’m trying to tell you is that I had nothing to do with what happened.”
It was the truth. It gleamed almost pleadingly in his eyes and in the way his mouth had pursed into a thin, white line. He searched her face with a tinge of desperation that reflected in the straight, tense lines of his shoulders.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” She sucked in a breath to calm herself. “Why didn’t you come after me? You’re telling me all of this now, four years too late and expect me to ... what? What do you want, Mason? Forgiveness? Does it even matter at this point? You’re leaving in three days and we will never have to have this conversation again.”
He pulled in a lungful of air, held it, and let it out in a loud growl. “I want you to stop looking at me like I broke your heart! That’s what I want.”
Heat prickled her cheeks, but she never broke eye contact. “But you did. To me, it wasn’t a stupid crush. I genuinely loved you and you just stood there that night and said nothing as everyone laughed at me for being an idiot.”
“You left before I could say anything,” he replied.
Julie threw open her arms, spoons still clutched in her hands. “What did you expect me to do? Stand there and continue to be humiliated? And what exactly would you have done had I stayed?” She laughed, short and cold. “Somehow I doubt that, because you looked green enough to be sick when I showed up.”
“You caught me by surprise, first by showing up, second by how ... beautiful, you looked in that pink dress, your hair around your shoulders and then you just stood there, hands fisted, looking so determined and scared ... I wasn’t prepared. I panicked.” He had the decency to bow his head. “I was eighteen, damn it!” He raised his gaze to her face. “I was a kid. I was stupid. I admit it. There are a lot of things I wish now I had done differently, but making the decision to wait until you were older, is not one of those regrets.” He was breathing hard now and his eyes were bright with determination. “I was leaving in two months to go to school in another province. How could I ask you to wait for me at fifteen?”
“But I would have!”
“I didn’t want you to!” he shot back with equal verve. “I didn’t want to only see you on holidays and maybe weekends. I didn’t want to steal those years from you. I wanted you to experience high school like a normal teenager, one who didn’t have a boyfriend who couldn’t take her to dances, or movies, or call her regularly. Go ahead.” He threw his hands up. “Call me a selfish bastard, but I fucking loved you enough to let you go.”
Julie’s jaw dropped. Her heart missed two whole beats in her chest. All the anger and hurt evaporated to a numb silence that seemed infinitely louder between her ears. It sounded like the ocean, vast and perpetually churning.
“What ... what did you say?”
His grin was humorless. “I—”
Wendy shuffled into the room, yawning widely. Her slippers scuffled on the hardwood as she staggered towards the island and Julie.
“I’m awake,” she announced. “I dreamt I was pink.” She yawned again, louder, all the while still talking. “Even my eyeballs and hair, and I had to go to school like that.” She blinked several times and squinted at the items lined on the counter. “Can I have oatmeal?”
As if on cue, the water on the stove came to a boil, bringing Julie completely out of her jumbled thoughts. She quickly shut it off and motioned for Wendy to take a seat at the table. The girl climbed up on a stool instead, next to Mason, who had yet to take his eyes off Julie.
Rick arrived next, followed by Luis, who was still recovering from his failed hot dog eating contest the night before and waved offers of breakfast aside. Dustin looked reasonably more cheerful when he strolled into the kitchen. He poured himself a bowl of cereal and scrambled up onto a stool.
“What are we doing today?” he demanded while drowning his corn flakes in milk. “I want to go into town.” He took a giant bite and, while chewing, announced, “I need to get the new
Dead Space
game. Mom said I could.”
Julie was still lost in the sea of her own thoughts and wasn’t fast enough to respond. Wendy and Rick picked up on the idea and squealed their approval, shouting their own needs in town.
“I want to get a pretty dress!” Wendy announced. “And
shoes
!”
“Can we go to the beach?” Rick asked.
“We don’t have a beach, dummy!” Wendy exclaimed, nudging Rick’s arm and making him drop his spoon. It struck the lip of Rick’s oatmeal bowl and clattered noisily to the counter, splattering porridge across the counter. “We have a lake.”
“Look what you made me do!” Rick cried angrily.
“Guys!” Nearly balanced in her thoughts, Julie approached the counter and faced the three watching her. “Let’s finish breakfast. Then we’ll decide.”
That satisfied the masses. They ate quickly, dumped their dishes into the sink, and scurried out of the room to get dressed.
Julie, thankful for Luis keeping Mason occupied, hurriedly rinsed the few dishes and wiped down the table before leaving to dress herself and get away from the gaping chasm threatening to swallow her whole.
In her room, she shut the door and leaned against it. The wood made a dull thud as the back of her head struck it. She shut her eyes.
Mason Brody loved her.
Mason Brody loved her.”
M
ason...
She wanted to cry. She wanted to squeal in excitement and dance crazy around the room. But she definitely wanted to cry. She wanted to curl up on the floor and sob. And it wasn’t out of happiness. The mammoth-sized ball of emotions crammed down her throat and suffocating her wasn’t joy. It was something else, something she couldn’t settle down long enough to name. Everything inside her was a jittering mess.
Pushing away from the door, Julie staggered to the terrace doors and peered through the rain splattered windows at the turmoil turning the heavens the color of sludge. Below, the lake churned. The water was the same mucky color as the sky. The waves lapped over each other and slammed into the dock and spilled over land. Around it, trees thrashed and swayed, shivering violently against the winds tearing through them. Julie felt a tickle of laughter in her throat that never made it to her lips. It was, in a grim way, funny how much the outside world fitted her insides.
A knock on the door startled her. She turned away from the terrace and moved to answer, part of her already knowing who she would find on the other side.
Sure enough, Mason raised his head and met her gaze. He was still clad in his flannel bottoms and t-shirt. His hands were in his pockets. He offered her a lopsided smile.
“Hey.”
Not sure how to act, or react, Julie could only stare back at him. Her fingers tightened around the doorknob.
Mason’s smile faded and grew serious. “The kids are waiting downstairs.”
Grateful that he wasn’t there to continue their talk, Julie nodded. “I just need to grab my purse.”
He didn’t stop her when she shut the door, putting it between them. Sucking down as much air, calm, and strength she could draw in, she snatched her purse and coat off the chair by the door and headed out.
Sure enough, Wendy, Rick, and Dustin hovered impatiently by the front doors. Dustin had his headphones on and stood slumped against the corner, but he kept casting annoyed glances towards the stairs. He quickly straightened when Julie came into view. He yanked the earbuds from his ears and stuffed the cords into his pocket.
“You guys ready to go?”
It really didn’t need to be said. Nevertheless, their enthusiasm made Julie smile and that was what counted.
Together, they scrambled out of the house and piled into the car. Julie fluffed the humidity and stray beads of rain from her hair with one hand and inserted her keys into the ignition with the other. She was fiddling with the knobs on the heater when the passenger’s side door swung open and Mason’s long, toned body folded itself into the seat. He grunted and slammed the door shut behind him.
“Whew!” he said, adjusting his frame more comfortably in her tiny compact. “I thought you guys were going to leave without me.”
Julie simply stared at him.
He stared back. “What? I need to pick a few things up.” He twisted his torso to look over his seat at the kids in the back. “You guys don’t mind if I tag along, do you?”
“Yay!” Wendy cheered.
Dustin and Rick made equal sounds of enthusiasm.
Mason turned back to Julie. “You okay with me coming along?”
Not sure what else to say, Julie shrugged. “Yeah, sure. It’s fine.”
Driving with him sitting less than a foot away proved to be harder than it should have been. Every turn was stiff. Every thought was a second too slow. She made three wrong turns before finding the center of town and the shops, which should have been impossible considering there was only one road that led into the heart of town.
Salmon Cove wasn’t famous for its giant outlet malls. Instead, they had tiny family run stores with shiny bay windows and warm, golden lights. It was the perfect place for tourists who wanted the picturesque scenery. Normally, Julie would have been one of them, but a lot of that thrill was sucked out by the cold tension that followed their every step, down every road and into every store. Warm, welcoming smiles instantly melted into tight, pinch-lipped frowns the moment their gazes bounced from Julie to the figure behind her. One woman even told them she was closing up for lunch, even though it had only been ten in the morning.
“I’m not having fun,” Wendy murmured as they left the only hobby and toy store in town empty handed.
Julie ran a gentle hand over the girl’s silky hair. “I know, sweetie. I’m sorry.” Her gaze roamed along the surprisingly bustling street and the row of shops on either side. “What do you say we get something to eat and try again?”
Wendy nodded gloomily. Beside her, Rick stood quietly, his face drawn. Dustin simply looked pissed, and she couldn’t blame any of them.
She turned to Mason standing tall and silent beside her. “Where’s a good place to eat?”
His blue eyes were dark, matching the thick overcast. “There’s a diner just up that way.” He gestured with a jerk of his chin. “But maybe I should head back, or wait in the car.”
Julie frowned at him. “What good would that do?”
He sighed and met her gaze squarely. “It might make things easier on you guys.”
Disgusted, not at him, but at the situation, Julie shook her head. “No, we came here together and we are going to stay together. This is ridiculous. Come on.”
She took Wendy’s hand firmly and tugged the group down the street in the direction of the ranch style cabin at the end of the block. Music, something western, filled the streets when Julie pushed open the door. Several heads turned, but the hushed whispers didn’t actually start until Mason stepped over the threshold.
Julie’s jaw set. Her temper crackled. She gripped Wendy’s hand tighter and dared the onlookers to say something. No one did, but the glances continued, as did the whispers.
“Let’s find a seat,” she muttered, propelling them through the maze of tables to an empty booth.
The kids slid in first. She and Mason took the ends.
A waitress came out from the back room behind the long counter at the other end of the room. Her pen and pad were already in her hands when she started towards them. Then her gaze went from Julie to Mason and she stumbled mid-stride. Her eyes flicked anxiously away and she veered off course towards another table.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” Julie hissed under her breath.
“You said a bad word,” Wendy whispered from beside her.
Julie ignored the girl and watched the waitress as she stood hovering over a table that had already been served.
“Jewels, I think—”
“Stop!” she ordered Mason before he could say another word. “This is bullshit. Hey!” she called when the waitress pulled away from the table and made a hasty dart towards the kitchen again.