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Authors: Kate McMullan

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BOOK: Knight for a Day
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Wiglaf’s eyes grew wide. Knuckle and Squint were kidnapping Sir Lancelot!
“Farewell, runts!” Knuckle cried. “By the time you get out of there, we’ll be feasting on nice juicy pork chops!”
“Nooo!” Wiglaf wailed. “Do not eat my pig!”
The door to the Rose Chamber slammed.
In a fury, Wiglaf kicked at the wardrobe door. His foot split through a rotten board. He kept kicking. Soon he had made a sizable hole. He scrambled out through it. Erica came next, followed by Angus.
“Come on,” said Erica. “We must get our swords. Then we shall capture the thieves!”
“And save Sir Lancelot!” cried Angus.
“And Daisy!” cried Wiglaf. “Poor Daisy!”
The three ran down the staircase. Wiglaf’s head was spinning. He had to get to Daisy—before it was too late!
They raced out of the castle. A full moon lit their way as they ran across the castle yard.
“Look, there they are!” Wiglaf whispered. He pointed toward the gatehouse.
Lancelot stood just outside the gatehouse. He held his steed and the wagon horses. Squint and Knuckle were inside the gatehouse, bent over the drawbridge crank.
“That crank is rusted stiff,” Erica said.
Wiglaf, Erica, and Angus kept to the shadows as they ran closer. They flattened themselves against the castle wall.
“We must rush them at once!” Erica said.
“Hold on,” cautioned Angus. “The squires are armed and dangerous. And we are not,” he pointed out. “We cannot win if we rush them.”
“You may be right,” said Erica. “But we must do something! They are about to escape!”
“Let us sneak up on them with the Quick Stalk,” Wiglaf suggested. “That way we shall have surprise on our side.”
Erica and Angus nodded.
With Wiglaf in the lead, they bent their knees and began stalking. No stalkers ever stalked more stealthily than did those three that night. Soon they could hear the thieves’ voices.
“Crank it down!” Squint growled. “Hurry!”
“I’m doing my best!” Knuckle said. “I could use some help, you know.”
“I can’t put down this bloody pig!” Squint said. “She’ll kick her way out of the bag.”
Wiglaf heard Daisy squealing as they crept nearer still.
“Here it goes!” Knuckle cried suddenly.
Wiglaf heard the groan of a chain. The crank was working! He stood helplessly by as the drawbridge came down with a bang.
Wiglaf’s heart pounded. He couldn’t let them get away! Not with Daisy in their clutches. He had to act! He started running at the thieves. He let out a warrior’s cry.
“ARRRRRRRRR!” Wiglaf roared as he ran.
Erica and Angus were right behind him. The thieves whirled around, startled.
The horses whinnied. They bolted away from Sir Lancelot, galloping for the stable.
“Come on!” cried Squint. “Let’s s move!”
Squint, Knuckle, and Lancelot took off running across the drawbridge.
The thieves were big and strong. But Wiglaf, Erica, and Angus were young and fast. They caught up with the thieves in the middle of the bridge. Wiglaf lunged for Daisy. He grabbed his pig and hung on for dear life.
“Gimme that!” cried Squint. He tried to pull the pig away.
But Wiglaf held on tight. He wrenched Daisy away from the thief.
Squint lost his grip on the bag, and he lost his balance. He teetered at the edge of the bridge. He windmilled his arms. But it was no use. Squint toppled off the bridge and into the moat-splash!
Angus grinned when he saw what had happened. Then he lowered his head and ran full speed at Knuckle. He butted him—hard!
“Ooof!” Knuckle gasped as Angus knocked the wind out of him. He let go of the gold. And he, too, fell into the moat.
“Your turn!” Erica yelled at Lancelot.
“Not I!” Sir Lancelot turned and started running back to the castle.
Erica stuck out her foot.
“Whoa!” Lancelot cried as he tripped over it. He, too, splashed into the moat. His armor made him sink up to his chin.
Wiglaf was still struggling with the knot on Daisy’s sack. He heard someone running behind him. He glanced over his shoulder. He gasped. A black-hooded figure in a nightshirt was speeding toward him, swinging an ax!
“I heard a commotion, boys!” cried the axman, who, of course, was Master X. “What is it? What’s going on?”
“Thieves are in the moat!” Erica cried. “Quick! They’re trying to get away!”
The ex-executioner ran to the foot of the drawbridge. Erica and Angus were right behind him. They jumped off the bridge and ran to where the soaking wet thieves were crawling out of the moat.
“Not another step, scoundrels!” Master X cried from beneath his hood. “Drop your weapons! Or I shall cut off your heads and use them for bowling balls!”
Knuckle, Squint, and Lancelot quickly threw their swords onto the bank of the moat.
On the drawbridge, Wiglaf finally untied the knot that held Daisy in the bag. His pig bounded out.
“Iglaf-way!” she cried happily. “Oo-yay avedsay y-may ife-lay!”
“Daisy!” Wiglaf wrapped his arms around her. He glanced down at Sir Lancelot. “See, sir?” he said. “I told you she could talk.”
Chapter 8
W
iglaf and Daisy jumped down from the drawbridge. They hurried over to the others.
Wiglaf stared at Sir Lancelot as he stood dripping beside the moat. He looked different somehow. He was barefoot, for one thing. And then Wiglaf realized that without his boots on, the knight was very short.
“What a good thing Frypot asked me to take night patrol for him tonight,” Master X said. He took a step toward Knuckle. “I think I’ll behead you first.”
“Not me!” cried Knuckle. “Do Squint first!”
“Tell me who you are!” Master X demanded.
“I’m Knuckle Squeegee,” Knuckle said, cracking his you-know-whats. “And that’s my baby brother, Squint.”
“Squeegee!” cried Master X. “Why, I’ve chopped off dozens of Squeegee heads! You come from a family of robbers, cutthroats, thugs, thieves, and homicidal maniacs!”
“That’s us,” said Squint proudly. He yanked off his eye patch.
“Wait! I know you,” Wiglaf exclaimed.
“Iglaf-way!” cried Daisy. “Int-squay and-yay Uckle-knay un-ray e-thay utcher-bay op-shay in-yay Inwick-pay!”
“The butchers of Pinwick?” Wiglaf said. No wonder Daisy had been so scared! And no wonder Knuckle and Squint looked so familiar. They were his father’s mead-drinking buddies!
“False knight,” said Erica. “Who are you?”
“I am no false knight!” Sir Lancelot said.
“The Squeegee brothers kidnapped him,” Wiglaf said. “Isn’t that so, sir?”
“That’s it exactly,” the knight agreed quickly.
“Not so!”said Erica. “Give your name!”
“He is Sir Lancelot!” Wiglaf cried. “We saw his sword-shaped birthmark.”
“Birthmark smirthmark!” Erica took a step closer. “Let’s have a look at it now.”
“I am who I say I am,” Sir Lancelot said.
“Then show us your left heel,” Erica said.
“Back off, knave!” Sir Lancelot cried.
“Do as he says!” Master X demanded.
Sir Lancelot scowled. But he turned around. He held up his left foot. Wiglaf saw that the “birthmark” was half gone.
“Ake-fay ight-knay!” cried Daisy.
“A dragon spit fire at my heel,” the knight said. “He burned off half my birthmark.”
“The truth, sir!” Master X said, raising his ax.
“He is Leon of the Lake,” Knuckle offered. “Lancelot’s twin brother.”
“Do not listen to him!” the knight cried.
“Lancelot is perfect,” Squint added. “But Leon is perfectly awful.”
Erica gasped. “You mean...”
“Yes,” said Squint. “Leon is Lance’s evil twin!”
Erica turned to Leon. “But Sir Lancelot makes no mention of you in
A
Knight Like
I.”
“Don’t rub it in,” Leon said sulkily. “We are twins, yet we have some differences. Lance is right-handed. I am left-handed. Lance is—”
“Tall,” Erica cut in. “And you are short.”
“Let Leon tell his story,” Wiglaf put in quickly. After all, what was so wrong with being short?
“When we were born,” Leon began, “except for the sword-shaped birthmark on Lance’s heel, we looked as alike as two peas in a pod. But our father believed that twins were bad luck. So he gave me away to a peasant family passing through Camelot. He never guessed that they were Squeegees.”
“Icked-way utchers-bay!” muttered Daisy.
“I had an excellent education,” Leon went on. “I started out picking pockets. Moved on to snatching purses. Robbing the collection plate at church. I dabbled in highway robbery. Some hit-man jobs. The usual. But every night I came home and read The
Medieval
Times. There were always stories about Lance. Lance killing dragons. Lance saving damsels. Lance fighting ten evil knights at once.”
Wiglaf felt half sorry for Leon.
“Lance became a knight,” Leon went on. “Damsels fainted for love of him. Oh, how I wanted to be him! I wanted to know how it felt to be perfect. And then Knuckle here came up with a plan.”
Knuckle cracked his knuckles. “The ‘Win a Knight for a Day’ contest was my idea.”
Wiglaf’s heart sank. Some contest winner he was. The whole thing was a scam.
“To pass for Lancelot, all I had to do was to act really, really conceited,” Leon said. “And wear elevator boots.”
“I should have known fuzzy dice weren’t Sir Lancelot’s style,” Angus said glumly.
“You have on Sir Lancelot’s armor, Leon,” Erica pointed out. “I know it by the bud vase on the chest plate, just above the heart.”
“Humph.” Leon fingered the small, silver vial. “I thought it was a snuff pouch.”
“It is meant to hold violets that damsels give to Sir Lancelot,” Erica said. “How is it that you have on his armor?”
Leon only smirked.
Master X brandished the ax again.
“I...I hired the witch, Morgana le Fay, to put a curse on Lancelot,” Leon confessed.
“A curse most foul!” cried Knuckle.
“Lance is too feather-brained to rescue damsels now!” Squint added. He and his brother cackled wickedly.
“I’ve heard enough!” cried Master X. “I shall execute all three of you at once!”
“But you said you were retired,” Leon whined.
“I’ll come out of retirement,” said Master X.
“Which,” he added, “will make me an ex-ex-executioner.” He eyed the three thieves. “Have you robbed other schools?” he asked.
“Nah,” said Squint. “This was our first. We heard that the headmaster here had lots of gold. And that he was none too clever.”
“My Uncle Mordred is very clever,” Angus said loyally.
“Where is Mordred anyway?” asked Erica.
“Oh, he’s safe,” Squint said with a wink.
“Very safe!” cried Knuckle.
The brothers laughed and slapped hands.
Daisy nudged Wiglaf. “Ordred-may is-yay in-yay is-hay afe-say!”
Wiglaf gasped. “Master X!” he cried. “They’ve locked Mordred in his safe!”
“We must get him out!” cried Angus.
“Don’t execute anyone until we get back, Master X,” Erica said. “Promise?”
“Oh, all right,” said Master X grudgingly.
“I’ll take these goosewits to the dungeon.” The ex-executioner poked Leon with his ax. “Get a move on,” he said. “Chop, chop!”
Wiglaf, Daisy, Erica, and Angus ran back toward the castle. Angus picked up Mordred’s sack of gold on the way.
They burst into the headmaster’s office.
“Uncle Mordred!” Angus cried.
A dull thump came from inside the safe.
“I’ll get you out, Uncle!” shouted Angus.
“But how can you?” asked Wiglaf. “No one knows the combination to Mordred’s safe.”
“That’s what he thinks,” Angus said. He ran to the safe and began spinning the dial. Half a minute later—
click!
—he opened the door.
There lay Mordred on the floor of the safe. Knuckle and Squint had tied him up like a turkey. They stuffed his socks in his mouth.
“Uggggg!” Mordred said.
Daisy lay down in a corner while the three rushed into the safe and untied Mordred. Angus yanked the socks out of his mouth.
“You peeked!” Mordred cried. He struggled to his feet. “You peeked at the combination to my safe!”
“No, Uncle!” Angus said.
“How else could you have opened the door?” Mordred bellowed. “It’s the thumb screws for you, nephew!”
“No, please!” Angus begged. “You doze sometimes at your desk. You talk in your sleep. I couldn’t help but hear the combination.”
“A likely story,” Mordred grumbled. “And what is that
pig
doing in my office?”
“Ust-jay esting-ray,” said Daisy.
Suddenly Mordred’s face fell. “Oh, jester’s bells!” he wailed. “I’d forgotten. My gold was stolen! Every lovely coin of it is gone!”
BOOK: Knight for a Day
6.05Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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